Sorry, I have to disagree. Don't leave the baby to cry - especially if it makes you feel bad or you're sitting "guiltily" in the next room, wondering if you are doing the right thing. Try the baby hammock - you'll be pleasantly surprised how calming it is.
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I can fully sympathise with you, it is very hard work and even harder when you're on your own. I agree with what Lou said previously. If you know your baby is fed, watered and changed, has no fever or isn't in pain etc, (by now mum's tend to know the difference between their babies types of cries) then lay them down in their cot with a musical toy if you have one, then shut the door and leave them to it. Leave them for at least 10 minutes, and if they're still crying go in and talk to her but DON'T pick her up. It's just a quick reassurance to her that you're still there. Leave her another 15 mins or so, if she's settled then great, if she hasn't settled and is still crying, just go in and give a quick soothing talk and reset her musical toy or something, and again don't pick her up. She will eventually settle, but I know from experience being at home alone with a husband who is away on business just how hard it is. Put the tv on a bit louder than normal and leave her to cry till she tires herself out. Some people may think this sounds awful, but as long as you know your baby is well and just crying (which babies sometimes do) then take some time our for yourself and leave her to it. It's a cycle that some babies can get in to and to keep your sanity it's a cycle that needs to be broken. I understand the feelings of wanting to shut her up, it's understandable to any mother who has a baby that cries and cries. It's very hard to deal with, and boy would life be easier if babies came with a remote control and you could switch on the mute button. But give yourself a break, go have a shower and sing in it (loudly!!!) then watch some tv. No harm will come to her from crying. She may cry for up to an hour maybe more, but only go in every now and then, and only to reassure her, no picking up, no rocking in arms etc. This is advice I read in quite a few of the books I got from my health visitor and from the library when I had trouble with one of my babies. It takes time, but it works. Hope some of this helps.
Catherine | |
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