thanks for the welcome, all!

I'm comfortable traveling throughout the U.S., including the conservative parts, so I think I'd be fine.

@22 yards: we could probably legally get married elsewhere. There are states in the U.S. that don't recognize a change of gender, so we'd be considered an opposite-sex couple in them. Plus there are a few states (like Iowa) where we'd be legal. But you're right, we shouldn't get married just for the permit, and I'm really not ready to get married yet, though who knows how I'll feel by next year.

@phos: I'm not Thai, though I've met some wonderful people of transgender experience who are. I'm white (mixed european with a German name). And I wouldn't assume the men aren't aware of her previously assigned gender. Often that knowledge makes men (of various orientations) much more interested.