The first 3 on your list are all meeting your requirements
(wädenswil, horgen and Adliswil)
Pfaffikon is further away and seems to have less character or centre of village and I personally would have killed my husband if he had moved me there, but thats just my preference.

I know less about uster, but there is good expat stuff there for kids, also some womens society with loads of activities for kids...
http://www.wac.ch/