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Old 09.04.2015, 15:15
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some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

encounter #1

Last tuesday, I was in Bern bahnhof reading the Blick newspaper.
I was alone, and this man sits beside me. There are a lot of places to sit but he choose to sit next to me. It was really uncomfortable.

encounter #2
I was looking at the big fahrplan in Bern bahnhof, the time, the gleis, etc.. And this guy was staring back at me. Et quoi? que?


I find it weird and unusual because I don't get glances in other countries. I don't find the schweizer men that attractive, they are too white for my taste. And I'm not used to being stared...by mostly men.

And mostly inside the train, they would sit beside me.
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:19
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

Conclusion - avoid bahnhof in Bern
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:26
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

I wish I can avoid it. But Bern bahnhof is my only means of transportation right now. It will take awhile but I can get used to it.

Last edited by 3Wishes; 09.04.2015 at 15:29. Reason: removed huge photo - feel free to resize and blur faces.
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:34
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

Some fun reading for you about stares. Get used to it:

Swiss Stare

Be aware of your belongings in the Bahnhof or any public area when people are very close to you. A friend of mine was recently pick-pocketed in a shop at the Bern Bahnhof. She had her arms over her head reaching for something high, and a lady actually unzipped my friend's purse while she was distracted and removed her wallet. My friend had seen the woman close by looking at some other clothes, but didn't realize how close the woman was getting or that her purse had been opened until the woman bumped her while running out the door.
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:44
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

Maybe you are attractive.
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:47
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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Maybe you are attractive.
.... or a shit magnet.
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:49
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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Some fun reading for you about stares. Get used to it:

Swiss Stare

Be aware of your belongings in the Bahnhof or any public area when people are very close to you. A friend of mine was recently pick-pocketed in a shop at the Bern Bahnhof. She had her arms over her head reaching for something high, and a lady actually unzipped my friend's purse while she was distracted and removed her wallet. My friend had seen the woman close by looking at some other clothes, but didn't realize how close the woman was getting or that her purse had been opened until the woman bumped her while running out the door.
Oh, I will be extra careful from now on going to Bern bahnhof!
I get stared in Geneva also but it was different compared to Bern.
In Geneva it was a friendly/warm kind of stare. (Mostly from portuguese/brazilian/latin americans)
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Old 09.04.2015, 15:55
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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Maybe you are attractive.
I'd say VERY likely you are attractive and gorgeous
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:03
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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.... or a shit magnet.
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:04
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

Being stared at doesn't necessarily mean attractive - ugly people get stared at, so do the disabled and disfigured. It means nothing. I get stared at apparently but told that usually by the people who are with me as I don't notice it because I'm not looking at anyone so it stands to reason people stare and you only notice it if you are looking at people...

I had an Arab man circle me whilst I was sitting on a bench near Bern Station, stand to one side and just stare at me and then sat way too close for my liking on a bench big enough for six people and started talking to me (not that I knew what he was going on about!) but this has happened to me in Africa and in the UK. There are odd people everywhere!
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:06
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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encounter #1

Last tuesday, I was in Bern bahnhof reading the Blick newspaper.
I was alone, and this man sits beside me. There are a lot of places to sit but he choose to sit next to me. It was really uncomfortable.

encounter #2
I was looking at the big fahrplan in Bern bahnhof, the time, the gleis, etc.. And this guy was staring back at me. Et quoi? que?


I find it weird and unusual because I don't get glances in other countries. I don't find the schweizer men that attractive, they are too white for my taste. And I'm not used to being stared...by mostly men.

And mostly inside the train, they would sit beside me.
are you male or female?
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:11
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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Being stared at doesn't necessarily mean attractive - ugly people get stared at, so do the disabled and disfigured. It means nothing. I get stared at apparently but told that usually by the people who are with me as I don't notice it because I'm not looking at anyone so it stands to reason people stare and you only notice it if you are looking at people...

I had an Arab man circle me whilst I was sitting on a bench near Bern Station, stand to one side and just stare at me and then sat way too close for my liking on a bench big enough for six people and started talking to me (not that I knew what he was going on about!) but this has happened to me in Africa and in the UK. There are odd people everywhere!
You are yet another attractive one
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:17
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

@MidfieldGeneral female
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:23
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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And mostly inside the train, they would sit beside me.
In Swiss trains it's normal to sit in the following ways:

o indicates empty seat, x indicates seats occupied by objects (bags etc.)
u indicates seats occupied by people

First

oo
oo

Then

ux
oo

Then

ux
xu


Then

uu
xu

Then

uu
uu



If it goes like this

first

oo
ux

and then immediately

oo
uu


that's weird for Swiss standards.
To avoid this reoccurring, next time do as most Swiss do and put your bag on the seat next to you in a 4-seater if the two seats opposite you are empty. If the person wants to sit next to you, point to the seat across from you or your bag (or a seat down the aisle if you prefer). If person (hopefully at least nonverbally) demands to sit next to you, give them a smile and keep your bag and body precisely where they are.
To not appear like a total d*kw*d however, if the train is packed, someone walks up and the two seats across from you are occupied already (like shown below)

uu
ux

remove your bag before or at the latest when someone asks "isch da no frei" ("is this seat (the one with your bag on) unoccupied?") and let them sit down.

If your bag is too heavy and you'd prefer not to lift it, tell them that you have problems lifting the bag and if they could kindly help you place it on the overhead bars, between the seats (some 4-seaters have luggage-sized gaps between them) or under your seat. Most travellers are helpful if you're polite and straightforward about e.g. inability to lift something.

It's down to a science, I tell you


If you feel uncomfortable/scared by someone on public transport (harassment, violence), know that swiftly walking in direction of travel will have you bump into a conductor sooner or later. There, report what has happened and request that he sort things out right away.

If you see someone else being harassed, it's IMO safest to do one of the following:
a) walk up to the person and ask: "Can I help you"/or French or German or Italian or whatever. If person says yes, tell them to come with you and go straight to the conductor, where you both report things.
b) go to the conductor straightaway, and report that someone's being harassed and they should sort it out right away.
c) address someone directly (e.g. "You in the blue shirt") and tell them to call the police if you don't have a phone on you to do so yourself and feel police is necessary.
d) call the police yourself if you have a phone on you and feel police is necessary.

Don't pick a fight with the harasser if you're not sure you'll be able to sort things out without any help and without overstepping your legal boundaries.

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Be aware of your belongings in the Bahnhof or any public area when people are very close to you.
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Oh, I will be extra careful from now on going to Bern bahnhof!
Make sure you don't start avoiding the train station as such though, because public transport is very important in CH.

Yes, be attentive when out and about, keep your bag (if not a backpack) in front of you rather than at your side or behind one hip. It's easy to keep a hand on it then. Put items between your legs (and frequently check they're still there) rather than under chairs/benches. As a matter of fact, on public transport travelers tend to place bags between their legs rather than under or behind seats if there is no empty seat they can occupy with it. If the bag is too large (e.g. a rollaboard), that goes between or under the seats.

Also, check out this highly useful thread: Harassment in train

Last edited by glowjupiter; 09.04.2015 at 17:28.
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:41
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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encounter #1

Last tuesday, I was in Bern bahnhof reading the Blick newspaper.
I was alone, and this man sits beside me. There are a lot of places to sit but he choose to sit next to me. It was really uncomfortable.

encounter #2
I was looking at the big fahrplan in Bern bahnhof, the time, the gleis, etc.. And this guy was staring back at me. Et quoi? que?


I find it weird and unusual because I don't get glances in other countries. I don't find the schweizer men that attractive, they are too white for my taste. And I'm not used to being stared...by mostly men.

And mostly inside the train, they would sit beside me.
May be don't read Blick or Fahrplan??

Sometimes staring back works well. Just stare back. You would then know when to call the police :-). The strategy of keeping your bag on the seat to next usually works and also keeps you away from holding your bag on your lap. Makes it comfortable for sure, unless there is a good crowd.

I don't know why you mention "schweizer men " because I don't think by simply looking/glancing/staring at people you can find their nationality.

Regards
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:41
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

Just remember:
- if there's one thing worse than being stared at ........



....... it's NOT being stared at.
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:41
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

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I find it weird and unusual because I don't get glances in other countries. I don't find the schweizer men that attractive, they are too white for my taste. And I'm not used to being stared...by mostly men. .
A racist female on EF?

Let me just call superhero to get you back on the straight and narrow so that you can love everyone for who they are and not based upon the color of their skin ....
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:50
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

This post is useless without pictures.
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:52
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

+1
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Old 09.04.2015, 16:54
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Re: some weird encounters in Bern bahnhof

It's almost Friday... who's bringing the popcorn?
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