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  #101  
Old 04.11.2014, 14:05
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Re: London vs Zurich

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I haven't been in London since 2000 (on a week's holidays). What changes should I expect to see if I go back?
Further to other comments, commuting is more busy/congested during rush hours. Many more bicycles around the centre and close to.

Depending which parts of London and time of day or night, lots more immigrants, so maybe on a bus and lack of English speakers.

Not sure what date Sunday opening started in UK, but many or most shops are now open on Sundays. I even found a Post Office open on a Sunday, though not all are & there are no postal collections on a Sunday.
The Government at some point recently mentioned they wanted General Doctor surgeries to be open on a Sunday!

The reason I mentioned the shops opening, is it has caused so much congestion on what was once a quiet day, especially for visiting friends on another side of London or outside, as previously it was quicker before Sunday opening.
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  #102  
Old 04.11.2014, 14:08
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Re: London vs Zurich

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@FuriousRose - I was actually referring to Singaporean women when I said "manipulated" but I agree with you regarding the contractual aspect of some of these marriages with traditional Asia. The concept of romantic love is often absent here in Asia even in Singapore. That's one of the reasons so many Asian women want to date Caucasian men because they marry into a love culture and also get treated better than traditional Asian men (marrying for romantic love is a traditionally European idea)...
Not necessarily marrying for romantic love. As I said, it's merely a contract. Perhaps these women are looking for better treatment. Although different cultural values can be counterproductive (e.g. Western men are somewhat not used to with the idea of marrying Asian women including their big family).
Western and Caucasian men are not all offering romantic love either. Some of them buy the idea of Asian women who serve and submit to their husbands (a German friend of mine is all over Japanese women because he thinks these women treat their men as flowers, e.g. adore and honour them ). Meanwhile, there's also an underlying reason here: the stereotype of Western Caucasian people as superior to Asian people.
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  #103  
Old 04.11.2014, 14:52
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Re: London vs Zurich

@ Tanny - yes you do see some Singaporean men with Caucasian women and they tend to be the younger educated generation but they are still vastly outnumbered by the vice versa pairing. It's also the case that often Caucasian women are bigger than Asian women sometimes due to obesity but Asian men are often of a smaller build than Caucasian women. Happy to meet for coffee if I move to Zurich.
@FuriousRose - agree about the stereotype of Caucasian superiority but most Europeans are very egalitarian and they go to Asia and Asians treat Caucasians as if they Asians are inferior. I don't get it; when I first arrived here a shop assistant would often serve the Caucasians first even if they weren't first in the queue !?!

Anyway thanks for your comments guys - maybe we can revert to the Zurich vs London debate...
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  #104  
Old 04.11.2014, 15:24
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Re: London vs Zurich

http://therealsingapore.com/content/...ept-craigslist
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  #105  
Old 04.11.2014, 15:37
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Re: London vs Zurich

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most Europeans are very egalitarian and they go to Asia and Asians treat Caucasians as if they Asians are inferior. I don't get it; when I first arrived here a shop assistant would often serve the Caucasians first even if they weren't first in the queue !?!

Anyway thanks for your comments guys - maybe we can revert to the Zurich vs London debate...
Yes, it is unfortunately the inferiority complex of some Asians. Due to the colonial background of the countries, many still think highly on the western powers. A Japanese would prefer things made in Japan, but it is not the case in many developing countries or even developed country like Singapore. Maybe things will change one day when the region becomes even richer than say Europe or US....
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  #106  
Old 04.11.2014, 15:53
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Re: London vs Zurich

Tannie has written what I was mulling over for the past hours.

I do think that stereotyping certain nationalities/ races are not helpful and just smacks of xenophobia. When I met my OH, it was never about our skin colours, or our education levels, etc. It was about "Hey, that man is quite kind, and charming, and makes me laugh". Although we are physically different, it took us no time to find out that we are eerily similar (same values inculcated, same discipline at home, etc.). We sometimes joke that if we did not look so physically different, we may have had to dig in our family background .

OP, I think the issue about location should not be your main concern. I would say take some time and focus on what a good partner really means. A good man could be standing right next to you but if you focus on the physical appearance, you may well miss him. L'habit ne fait pas le moine.

Good luck
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  #107  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:04
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Re: London vs Zurich

Phil, you are probably not aware what the website you just shared is... "the real singapore" is the local teenage troll HQ infamous for making things up or ripping things out of context or proportion. I'd bet ten bucks that they either fabricated the story themselves or fell for another troll.

OfficeGirl- if there is one person on this thread who gave me the impression she believes in being something better than an Asian... that would be you. The racial undertones in your post suggest that you read far too much Singaporean tabloids. Chinese and Vietnamese are for example real humans as well and not some sort of trash for working class Singaporean men.
This sort of argument is major turn-off for any caucasian guy like me who happens to have Asian friends... like most expats in Singapore. Won't make you look good at a date, trust me. I live here for some years as well and btw: Most Asian guys would love dating western women, but well: Most expat women are not interested. Which means they up front decide that 90% of the population is not good enough for them... and then complain that the other few are less discriminating.

I find your explanations why you see more western men with Asian women around here rather bizarre and based on rather daft stereotypes. It is simply statistics: Most people get married in their late 20s to 30s. Most Europeans posted here for a job are by a massive margin men. Single men find often local girls, others bring their partner from Europe. Single Western women are a tiny fraction of the population. If they want to can they easily find a local man, but most don't... and rather bitch about how "easy" the local girls are.
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  #108  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:05
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Re: London vs Zurich

@ Tannie - please take a look at the results of this research paper on international marriages:-
http://www.ari.nus.edu.sg/docs/wps/wps12_174.pdf
See in particular page 8 "Different characteristics of spouses in the case of males and females marrying spouses." Most men from developed Asian countries marry women from deuveloping Asian countries. Only 1% marry western women. Most women from developed Asian countries marry men from developed countries, 25% of these marriages are to Caucasian men.

There is also a very interesting survey that was done on interracial dating by okcupid in the US. Unfortunately I can't post the link as the Singapore government has blocked the link to the chart but you can google it.

Anyway, take a look at the statistics yourself before screaming bigotry and offence. I will leave it at that and hopefully we can return fully to London vs Zurich.
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  #109  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:06
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Re: London vs Zurich

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And the ones you meet here will have a certain level of education and a decent job
Not so sure about that, if you believe some people on this forum there are ex-pats in Zurich who earn less than 120,000 CHF!
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  #110  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:13
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Re: London vs Zurich

i think dating biases can be explained with a few simple factors:

- women like to date men who are taller than themselves. this automatically creates racial biases due to differences in height e.g. tall black people, short asian people
- men and women like to date people 'better' than them. this can be in looks, youth, wealth, intelligence, kindness etc.
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  #111  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:18
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Re: London vs Zurich

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i think dating biases can be explained with a few simple factors:

- women like to date men who are taller than themselves. this automatically creates racial biases due to differences in height e.g. tall black people, short asian people
There are tons of tall Asian men in Singapore, but most of them are of Indian origin which seems to be particularly not accepted by expat ladies...
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  #112  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:19
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Re: London vs Zurich

@ Treverus - have you ever lived in Asia? Before you start claiming bigotry, I consider myself to be way more open minded than most people; I moved to Singapore to be with my Indian boyfriend whose family rejected me. I then funnily enough found myself stuck in the middle of this weird dating scene where as accurately depicted in the real Singapore, many many (not all) Asian women are chasing Caucasian men. After dating Indian men I realized that the intercultural (including sometimes unequal gender roles) is just too big a bridge to cross. And by the way most Chinese families and men are the same as Indians and consider Caucasian women too vociferous and opinionated to make a decent wife. Date a Caucasian girl (especially Indian men) but marry an Asisn girl - that's the way it is here. Western society is more free and open hence why Indian, South Korean, Japanese women emigrate to the west because their societies have a cut off point when they are considered too old to get married. So they go to the west to meet nice brainwashed liberal people like you who are blind to cultural differences.
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  #113  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:32
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Re: London vs Zurich

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@ Treverus - have you ever lived in Asia?
I live in Singapore and have done so for some years..
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  #114  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:33
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Re: London vs Zurich

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Tannie has written what I was mulling over for the past hours.

I do think that stereotyping certain nationalities/ races are not helpful and just smacks of xenophobia. When I met my OH, it was never about our skin colours, or our education levels, etc. It was about "Hey, that man is quite kind, and charming, and makes me laugh". Although we are physically different, it took us no time to find out that we are eerily similar (same values inculcated, same discipline at home, etc.). We sometimes joke that if we did not look so physically different, we may have had to dig in our family background .

OP, I think the issue about location should not be your main concern. I would say take some time and focus on what a good partner really means. A good man could be standing right next to you but if you focus on the physical appearance, you may well miss him. L'habit ne fait pas le moine.

Good luck
I agree with Clumsy Maman here. OfficeGirl, who knows you'd probably meet a Singaporean man in London and end up living in Zurich
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  #115  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:40
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Re: London vs Zurich

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There are tons of tall Asian men in Singapore, but most of them are of Indian origin which seems to be particularly not accepted by expat ladies...
the fact that there are many tall asian men in singapore does not impact my point.
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  #116  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:41
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Re: London vs Zurich

Getting back to Z v L, the two are really very different cities, each great in their own way. Perhaps the distance between here and Singapore is making them seem a little too similar... If you can, why not take some time out from Singapore to reconnect with people you know in both the UK and Switzerland? Spend some time in Zurich and London and see what clicks for you. Better still, if you have the luxury of time and enough money, travel to some new places. Who knows who you'll meet en route and what ideas for the future you could have
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  #117  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:46
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Re: London vs Zurich

@ Treverus - you're a Caucasian man, I'm a Caucasian woman. Did you take a look at the marriage stats? Do you still think that we're all equally attracted to each other?

@ FuriousRose and Clumsy Mama - of course it's not about skin colour but you need to be physically attracted to someone to have a relationship and cultural differences have a disproportionately bigger impact on women rather than men!! Many Asian societies are rigid, hierarchical and patriarchal (apart from Singapore and Hong Kong) - another reason so many Asian women want to flee!!
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  #118  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:53
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Re: London vs Zurich

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@ Treverus - you're a Caucasian man, I'm a Caucasian woman. Did you take a look at the marriage stats? Do you still think that we're all equally attracted to each other?
You are taking the marriage statistic out of context and I already told you so. How many expats in Singapore are single men vs. single women? Not a surprise at all that there are more international marriages with Caucasian men if they outnumber the ladies 10:1, no?

You cannot at the same time say "I had an Indian boyfriend" as well as "I am not attracted to Asians". You do not make sense...
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  #119  
Old 04.11.2014, 16:57
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Re: London vs Zurich

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You cannot at the same time say "I had an Indian boyfriend" as well as "I am not attracted to Asians". You do not make sense...
Many people do not consider Indian's to be Asian's

She is basically saying skin colour is not an issue but she's not attracted to the oriental man....I think.
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  #120  
Old 04.11.2014, 17:01
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Re: London vs Zurich

@ Treverus - Asia is a huge place - Indians are generally physically more similar in size to Caucasians than Chinese.

Regarding the marriage stats - I have loads of (slim, attractive, pleasant) Caucasian girlfriends. Out of ten, two have found boyfriends here (one has a Caucasian boyfriend and one had an Indian boyfriend), three have left Singapore boyfriendless having found it difficult to date or have had short relationships with Caucasian men who "want to be free and enjoy Singapore." The others are still single and looking!! This has been told to me many times by Caucasuan women. Interestingly divorce lawyers estimate the expay divorce rate in Singapore to be around 70%. Maybe you can invite one of them on a date or wait you want to show that you're so open minded and well travelled that you only date women from Exoticstan.
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