Hello all,

I'm from California where we have beautiful sun for more than half the year, beaches everywhere and always something to do. I'm currently living here in Switzerland and finding it extremely hard not to be depressed. I've made a couple friends (an American and a German) which I hang out with, but coming from a culture where you always have at least 10 people to call for fun, I feel really lonely. I live in Wollerau, about 30 minutes from Zürich, so there's really no social scene in my area or opportunity for me to meet new people. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do to get more familiar with fun things around here and meet fun people around my age?

Here's a list of things I've tried already and a little personal information to help.

* I'm 24 and just finishing college
* I work full time (probably changing to a 60-70% schedule soon)
* I live with my boyfriend who's Swiss
* I'm in the process of learning the language
* I've attended the Professional Women's Group in Zürich (older people)
* I've gone to the Toast Master's meeting (older people)
* I've talked to random people on the train
* I've thought about going to events posted on the calendar, but people
seem a lot older than me or married.

Thanks in advance for all your help.

I've been there. The resolution that got me through:

Be the fun-loving gregarious person you are no matter what. Don't accept the coldness and aloofness as a reprove. Smile when you see a scowl. Know that you know better. Remember to first give out what you want to get back. Eventually you will attract people of like mind. We are out here.

I know I sound like a fortune cookie, but it worked for me.

Oh, and send 50CHF to EF for the advise.

Cheers!

Keep an eye on the calendar - Uncle Max's fortnightly Talacker nights (on a Wednesday, you just missed one) are a good start and there's always other little bits and bobs being posted.

Hope you find stuff that makes you happier!

Hi there,

Going to the Forum events really is a great way to meet people, everyone is very friendly. Of course not everyone is going to be of the same age and background, but if we were all the same that would make things a little boring , and surely its part of the living abroad/expat experience that you get to meet lots of different people.

I do understand what you mean though, sometimes it is difficult when you dont have the same social network and support that you had at home. I've found the best way to get through that is just to be open and talk to someone. I think most people have been through that plateau of having made a few friends, but still not feeling as comfortable as at home, and they can empathise.

I PM'd you as well

Claire

It is hard to come here especially from a Sun state. I am
also from a sun state and find the amount of rain hard
to get used to.

I know what you mean about meeting people. People in the
US are more friendly and outgoing. The English Forum is
a great place to meet English speakers.

Come to some of the events, and you will get to know a
few good people.

This is a beautiful country. Enjoy!

I don't think it matters where you come from or go to - being somewhere new is always going to be tough at first. I'm sure just about everyone on the forum has felt the same way you do at some point in their Swiss adventure - but it gets better. Look at it this way, at least you have someone who knows the language, knows the place and how things work - you're actually in a better position than many others here! Get on a train and come to Wed night drinks at the Talaker - you'll meet more people than you'll be able to remember, and if nothing else, meet a couple of people who won't replace your friends back home, but may be going through the same thing, and can share an email back and forth.

Please attend an EF event- you'll find that there are alot of people your age.

There are tons of things to do here... just no surf or Fashion Island's (btw, I'm from So. Cal. too).

"... coming from a culture where you always have at least 10 people to call for fun..." I really don't think that is cultural; you've moved that's all! And like all of us here, you need to create a new life for yourself.

You have a great opportunity to be able to live here, with a native... take advantage of it.

What I mean by the ¨culture¨remark is that in the US we tend to have a lot more friends and acquaintances, so we always have a big pool of people to choose from; whereas, here the people have about 4-5 true diehard friends. Its just different, but I know what you're saying. Thanks for the advice.

Er, there's a *cool* reggae concert tonight, you're welcome to join us. We're about 12 having dinner first, then a few more join later for the show itself.

We don't all know each other - I LOVE how this works on EF - but those that do know each other do so purely through the Forum.

This site provides many opportunites to get to know others. As a veteran on here I've met many, many wonderful people whom I call friends. I also make sure not to limit myself to just English speaking people (that way lies madness) although the temptation is wildly easy.

Utilise your partners friends - actively pimp them to provide contacts they have whom you may get along with, they'll understand the request and everyone knows someone in a similar position - and get to grips with the uphill graft that is learning the language.

But for spontaneity, you'd be hard pressed to find someone in Wollerau, so get your SoCal backside off the sofa and come and join us sometime. There are people from teens to Seniors who join us, it's a great community.

Did I mention the Gregory Isaacs concert at the Rote Fabrik this evening?

(See the calendar for details )

__________________
English Forum Social Events Calendar / Advanced Forum search / If all else fails / Props

...oh, and there's five-a-side Football (soccer) tomorrow afternoon in downtown Zurich, marathon runners notwithstanding. See my sig for details.

All abilities are welcome, and the Lady players often run rings around the chaps.

Then we go for beer and fries.

There are about 20 people signed-up for tomorrow, from many different nations. It's all very casual.

I hope you don't mind some Chili Peppers on your thread. If you do, please ask me to remove it.

It will take time, but you will make more friends, (see i am now your friend). I know it seems hard now, but things will get better. Please do go to an event i have been to a few, i have even travelled nearly 2 hrs to get to one of them so much they are brilliant everybody is different, but really nice, and i always have a fantastic time. I am not 24 anymore, but that does not mean i cannot act 24years old lol. I am also married, but that does not stop me from having fun talking to other people, my husband comes also to the events, but he also goes off, and talks to people. Have a look at the photos at **** up at the brewery go to page 8, and have a look at the people in them

__________________
I am no longer a fluffy bunny. watch out a new Sutter is in town

Sutter is übercool!

I know exactly how you feel. We moved to the confederation 9 months ago from Bangkok (via Oman prior to our UK base) and I felt and still do feel like a fish out of water. OUr daughter is 6 and goes to International school, I sometimes feel so lonely and isolated I am at the school 30 minutes before she finishes so I can find someone to talk to. I do spend a lot of time on EFS, time that could be more productively spent on housework and jobseeking TBH, but.......................................
If you want to meet up, PM me, I am available most/all of the time.
I should warn you that I am 43 coming on 44 but I do have a youthful outlook - at least I'd like to think I have

__________________
The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world
Educate a woman, educate a nation

I hope that you have found everyones answer has made you feel more positive knowing that most people feel that awful feeling of isolation and feeling lonely.
I must echo what some members have said about not restricting yourself to just people of your own age. My son is at University and his friends still come round to visit me and I also go out with my daughters friends and she is 22! Although I have never been to an EF event I am going to make the effort this year and travel up north. They sound like GREAT fun and the nice thing is that the age range is very varied,

So - I SHALL SEE YOU THERE

Sorry, a bit off tangent to the subject of the original post.
But this RHCP video is massively cool! Thanks for posting it!

I hear you! I'm from the Midwest but my last home in the States was in FLORIDA!!! Now I must be living in THE greyist corner of Switzerland and it can be depressing...

I can't add much to what has already been said (i's all good advice), but there is one thing: Get out and take some classes, like dancing, cooking, whatever.

Btw, how are you getting along with the language? Does your partner speak English or SG to you?

You don't have to go north to find EF events.

Heather

Substitute mountains for beaches: go climbing, mountain biking, skiing - it's great fun.

EF for lots of English speaking friends.

And just go to pubs and start talking in English to people your own age - they'll happily join in.

But stick to it - I went through the rough times too, but then I bought a bike and went cycling everywhere and had a real blast.

Cool. Glad you liked it. You know, there's a thanks button at the bottom of each post. Cheers!