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  #21  
Old 06.05.2015, 00:22
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

... the Hauswart told my wife that is was not done to put just any kind of flowers in ones flowerboxes on the balcony in the Mehrfamilienhaus. No, in CH one plants geraniums ... red ones. At least in THIS Mehrfamilienhaus thank you.
But you can leave them now. Just take 'm away next week. Thank you. And would you please take your laundry off the line at 07:00 because Frau XY needs the washing machine then and needs the clothesline at 09:00 and the Zivilschutz is checking the Luftschutzkeller next week so if you would please clean up your ....

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  #22  
Old 06.05.2015, 00:36
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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Haha.

Without an inkling of German, and needing to use the restroom badly, I see the signs "Damen" and "Herren". So I peed in the women's bathroom.
Don't worry my Swiss wife and I often go to events where there is a queue for the ladies toilet so she regularly goes in the "Herren" WC.
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  #23  
Old 06.05.2015, 00:36
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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When you cannot get your kid booked in any local activities as they are all fully booked, you know that you are not "one of them"
How would you know it was just a pretext
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  #24  
Old 06.05.2015, 00:37
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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... the Hauswart told my wife that is was not done to put just any kind of flowers in ones flowerboxes on the balcony in the Mehrfamilienhaus. No, in CH one plants geraniums ... red ones. At least in THIS Mehrfamilienhaus thank you.
But you can leave them now. Just take 'm away next week. Thank you. And would you please take your laundry off the line at 07:00 because Frau XY needs the washing machine then and needs the clothesline at 09:00 and the Zivilschutz is checking the Luftschutzkeller next week so if you would please clean up your ....

Bu##er, I have pink Geraniums.....
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  #25  
Old 06.05.2015, 00:41
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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... the Hauswart told my wife that is was not done to put just any kind of flowers in ones flowerboxes on the balcony in the Mehrfamilienhaus. No, in CH one plants geraniums ... red ones. At least in THIS Mehrfamilienhaus thank you.
But you can leave them now. Just take 'm away next week. Thank you. And would you please take your laundry off the line at 07:00 because Frau XY needs the washing machine then and needs the clothesline at 09:00 and the Zivilschutz is checking the Luftschutzkeller next week so if you would please clean up your ....

I must be an atypical auslander because I quite like my Swiss and non-Swiss neighbours. (with a single exception, but nothing dramatic)
Our Hauswart is a nice guy too.
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  #26  
Old 06.05.2015, 04:03
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

Fotze in Swiss German would be FUTZ
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  #27  
Old 06.05.2015, 04:40
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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Fotze in Swiss German would be FUTZ
Thanks Wolli, I think we get it.
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  #28  
Old 06.05.2015, 09:46
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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How would you know it was just a pretext
The classes are really full. My point was not that I thought the folks were trying to exclude us - no, they have been wonderful. The incident was due to a lost in translation moment (which meant we were in a waiting list for 5 months), and perhaps a lack of the Swiss network! On Monday, I wish I could do a bit of begging in Swiss German
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  #29  
Old 06.05.2015, 15:18
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

When a Swiss man follows and heckles you for a few mins scolding you for crossing the road without waiting for the green man even though there were NO CARS and then tells you "If you don't like how we live here, go home!"

When you speak to someone in hochdeutsch and they reply in Swiss German then get annoyed at you for not understanding.

When your "house mother" or the woman who takes care of your apartment building knocks on your door at 1.10pm and asks you why you are not yet using the laundry room if you booked it for 1pm...

When the IMMIGRATION OFFICE doesn't speak English and doesnt seem to want to put you on to someone who does...

When you have to "book" a social outing/ having coffee with someone a month in advance or more...

Yep. Switzerland is definitely a relaxed place to be...
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  #30  
Old 06.05.2015, 18:45
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

when your swiss colleagues tell you that "Schweizermacher" is totally completely and utterly exaggerated and you find, hm, you actually recognized a lot ...

when you find out that in Switzerland things will never change because of two simple reasons:
1. das hei mer nie so gmacht (we have never done it that way)
2. das hei mer immer so gmacht. (we have allways done it that way)
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  #31  
Old 06.05.2015, 19:22
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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Bu##er, I have pink Geraniums.....
I never had Geraniums and was never told that I should!
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  #32  
Old 06.05.2015, 21:29
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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Bu##er, I have pink Geraniums.....


Better that than climbing clitoris...did I mean clematis??
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  #33  
Old 06.05.2015, 23:15
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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when your swiss colleagues tell you that "Schweizermacher" is totally completely and utterly exaggerated and you find, hm, you actually recognized a lot ...

when you find out that in Switzerland things will never change because of two simple reasons:
1. das hei mer nie so gmacht (we have never done it that way)
2. das hei mer immer so gmacht. (we have allways done it that way)
Ebbe! Enjoy.
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  #34  
Old 06.05.2015, 23:46
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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Better that than climbing clitoris...did I mean clematis??
You mean it's good enough for a British princess but not for you?

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Wyevale Garden Centres is launching a double flowering clematis named after Princess Charlotte this week.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/gardening...-Princess.html
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  #35  
Old 07.05.2015, 00:01
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...when on entering Switzerland they x-rayed me in Basel to see if I was bringing tbc into the country.
Or some exotic lung-worms whatever.
From the Netherlands, that is.

... I had to pay a SFr 200 deposit for my telephone connection and no one tells you that you can get it back when you get your C-Bewilligung ...

... they let me pay church taxes with my "Quellensteuer" although at "Religion" I entered "--" and it took me many years to find out that I could get my money back ... (I know I know, my mistake, but why doesn't anybody tell you?!)

Last edited by lost_inbroad; 07.05.2015 at 00:16.
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  #36  
Old 07.05.2015, 11:05
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

... I stepped off the mat at the Multimat for a second, when paying bills.

It ate my card. This is apparently well-known to everyone, so there were no signs warning me of the possibility. Also self-evident was the fact that the bank staff couldn't open the machine to give me my card back until after the bank holiday, nor could they give me a cash advance as I didn't know my account number (it was on the card)...

I had a very quiet Bank Holiday weekend, and was first in the queue when the bank reopened.
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  #37  
Old 07.05.2015, 11:24
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

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... I stepped off the mat at the Multimat for a second, when paying bills.

It ate my card. This is apparently well-known to everyone, so there were no signs warning me of the possibility.
I must be an Auslander because I have absolutely no idea what this is.

( obviously never encountered it as my card has never been eaten)
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  #38  
Old 07.05.2015, 11:48
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

I'm going back a bit here, 10-12 years, before e-banking really took off. Multimats are those big machines next to the ATMs in bank lobbies - you feed your payment slip into one hole, your bank card into another, and don't have to plug in all of the details yourself. I'm not sure they even exist any more!

I remember it so acutely because I'd been over here for about six months, was really pleased with myself for learning so much about a new culture/language and felt I was really getting the hang of it. A long weekend without cash really knocked me back into place...
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  #39  
Old 07.05.2015, 12:00
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

The other day the SBB ticket inspector told me off because I had signed my GA with the wrong type of ink.
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  #40  
Old 07.05.2015, 14:09
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Re: I knew I was an auslander when......

A positive auslander experience:

Shortly after arriving here I applied for a TV decoder box with some extra English channels from our local TV service provider by posting them a form I got from a display stand in our local shopping center, the next day the decoder was delivered to our post box with a funny little orange payment slip....

As an auslander from Africa I could not believe they sent it so quick and without receiving any kind of payment....
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