Hey guys,

I need a bit of advice on local etiquette.

I'm having a few friends around on Sunday for lunch, are there any Swiss DOs and DON'Ts that I should be aware of? Don't want to start my social life in Switzerland with any mother-of-all-faux-pas .

examples, if the guests bring wine, do you drink open it at the table or not? shoes on or off? butter on the table or oils? stuff like that...

maybe not be terribly important given that the guests are French

thanks in advance

EDIT: about the guests being French, didn't mean that they have no manners, meant that they may or may not be too worried about Swiss customs - would still like the suggestions though

My advice would be to relax, enjoy and do your own thing in your home.

If you're happy then your guests should be too.

From the other side, as somebody's guest, I enjoy seeing how other cultures do things.

Just have a nice time, relax and don't sweat the details.

If you were invited to their house, i guess you wouldnt expect them to try and be Italian.
Therefore, im sure they are not expecting you to be anything but yourself.
So just relax and enjoy it.
Show them the way you like to wine and dine and not how you think the swiss/french would do it.

Play to the stereotypes, smother everything in garlic and onions, wear a stripey t-shirt and say Ooo lalala a lot.

For added effect serve boiled chicken with one small carrot and claim it's 3 star Michelin class food.

Just be sure to wait until everybody is served and then say 'Bon Appétit!' before beginning to eat!

I'm used to different cultural practice, but then I'm always a bit surprised when Brits begin shovelling down their food without saying anything I'd say it's the only truly 'shocking' thing for us Swiss

1. Make them take off their shoes when they come in. I've been in homes where the host actually has slippers for guests. However, none of the slippers never fit me correctly and I always ended up just walking around in my socks.

2. Ahh... the wine. A meticulous host has unbottled the wine to let it "air out" before the dinner, so there's no need to use their bottle unless you want to. Just remember, you might drink two bottles of wine so it would be best sticking to the same kind.

3. Forget everything and do what makes you feel comfortable. There's nothing more successful than a charming hostess in a comfortable home.

Tell them to make themselves at home and you won't feel so bad when you ask them to later fill the dishwasher. Make sure they're fed soon after arrival; guests are usually hungry. Don't spend an hour in the kitchen leaving them bored and hungry...

Relax and have a good time, enjoy the company and they will too. Everyone loves an invitation to a friend's house and appreciates a home-cooked meal.

As the host, it is your privilege to pick up your wine glass first and say "santé". If you see them eyeing their brimming cups with longing, it's time!

Walter. It's your house. Treat them to your hospitality.

Hi Walter, I will be brief!

• Shoes
• Wine
• Common etiquette
• Surprises

Viel Glueck! may you be the host with the most!

I really like that "Surprises" thread Hsiang!


Meanwhile, for the OP...
If you are hosting a dinner, just do things as you would usually do at home.

If you remove your shoes, make sure you have a good place where folks can feel comfortable removing their shoes. As it is cold out (and a bit chilly inside too) these days, it is a good idea to have slippers handy for your guests.

Regarding the wine: If you are brought wine that would go with the meal (and not clash with whatever wine you're serving), go ahead and serve it. If it will not go with the meal, do not serve it. I have had both happen when dining with my Swiss brother-in-law... I've brought a wine I like for them to try at some point (which did not get served) and I've brought a wine that they like - which happened to go with the meal and we all enjoyed during the meal.

Butter vs oil on table...
That's a toughie for me as if I am hosting a meal, I will have everything I would use with each stage available for that stage. I've only ever had oils on the table when eating at Italian restaurants... if this is a normal thing for you AND it goes with the meal or appetizer plan, do it, otherwise, don't worry. Meanwhile, if I am serving baked (jacket) potatoes, I will have everything I would usually like on my potatoes available - butter, sour cream, chives and cheddar cheese for regular potatoes, butter and cinnamon for sweet potatoes.


Heading to Hsiang's recommended reading list regarding surprises particularly:
I say to be prepared for about anything.
If you are serving copious amounts of alcohol, expect to have someone sleep over, particularly if folks are driving or would be leaving after the last tram. It may not happen but it is better to be prepared.
So, make a check list of things - spare toothbrush(es), spare pillow(s), spare blanket(s), perhaps an air mattress (if couch is ill suited to the occasional visitor snoozing off some drink).
Make sure to have some morning after / hangover remedy on hand, particularly some juice, bread, fruit and pain meds as well as coffee / tea and of course, plenty of water.


Prior to my married days, it was a pretty common thing for me to wind up with (or be) an overnight guest - if it was another female, we tended to just crash in each other's bed, otherwise, some spare bedding was a very good thing to have.

My sis now teases me about all of the bedding I have (which was left with Mom when I came here)... she just doesn't know how to roll I guess.

I'm glad you approve i didnt get many replies on that one though, maybe i sounded flaky

it is quite important to prepare for anything, esp during seasons when the weather can become so bad, that the guests got nowhere to go.

ps: what are you doing up at 7am on a sat?!

If your dinner party is to be held in Canton Schwyz, do:

• invite your guests to bring their own knives;
• insist that they hang their firearms on the hooks in the porch before entering;
• provide convenient bowls under the benches for the purposes of micturition, expectoration and so on;
• send your wife and daughters to stay with relatives at least a week in advance;
• put all valuable and breakable objects in storage;
• protect all windows with chicken wire.

Do not, on the other hand:

• let your guests bring their favourite cows or goats to the table, even if they insist that they possess a marriage licence for them;
• leave candles, lanterns or any other naked flames within reach of your guests or their servants;
• forget the strict rules of hospitality that mean that you are responsible for the welfare of each guest until he leaves the bounds of your parish, transgressions of which may result in a blood debt upon your household, ending with your family being obliged to live in a tower with a retractable ladder.

Apart from that, as other posters have suggested, enjoy yourself!

I went back to bed (shortly) after posting that.

I was up because hubby had to be at work by 6 today and I get up with him to have a morning chat and some hot chocolate before he goes.



I'm trying to think of other do and don't things for having folks over - particularly if you've not cooked for them before.

I'd tend to be careful about serving anything with shell fish or peanuts as both of those are notorious for people having very severe allergic reactions even if it is in tiny tiny amounts.

Also, until you know each other quite well, I'd avoid serving foods that tend to make folks gassy... very little or no broccoli for example. If, on the other hand, a toot or two isn't a big thing with the crowd in question, there's less to worry about.

Make sure to ask if anyone's vegetarian/vegan before they arrive. Nothing worse than having to whip up an omelette (providing they're not vegan of course!) and serve everyone else their dinner at the same time.
I'm vegetarian and always tell the host well before I go to their house for dinner. Yes, it's a pain to have to prepare another meal, but most people who ask me for dinner say it's nice to cook something totally different for a change.

Look at their bottle, decide if it's worth drinking (very likely if it's Swiss: with few exceptions, Swiss people tend to waste their time in the vineyards), if not, open one of your bottles and tell the guests about theirs: "I'd rather use it for some cooking during the week".

well, if you can speak French......

This post is a total puzzle to me. I don't get one word of it. what's this got to do with a dinner party?

If you've chosen a specific wine to complement the dinner, you should use that. A bottle of wine brought by guests is a gift to the household - not necessarily to be drunk immediately. What you can do is ensure that you've already opened your wine - that gives you a good excuse not to open theirs... at least until everyone has reached the stage of inebriation where they can no longer tell if it's vinegar.


That's because we don't have a stock phrase. Some British households might say grace before eating. But for the non-religious, the closest we've got to "Bon Appetit" is "I hope it chokes you". What would you expect us to say?

It's called "humour". hth