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  #41  
Old 27.12.2010, 18:15
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

My uncle died of alcoholism. His situation was painful - for him, his immediate family and for the rest. I shamefully have to admit that to provide help was as difficult as impossible. At times I was not sure if I have sympathies for him or my aunt or cousin, who was a kid at that time. Even now I still recall some really nasty scenes I do not wish to share here. In his case the main problem was the addiction fact. He did get professional help and medical attention, but the long term substance abuse took its toll.
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  #42  
Old 27.12.2010, 18:58
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

Helpful link on AA: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature...&v=n86JKqA8o4w
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  #43  
Old 27.12.2010, 22:40
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

"He gets crazy when he is drunk, a completely different person to who he normally is."

Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde
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  #44  
Old 27.12.2010, 23:02
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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Alcoholics anonymous, is one of the few programmes that I have heard does actually work for some people.
I recommend you read the Cochrane Review on this one. Also, it could be suggested that AA is one of the few programs that can foster addiction...to AA.
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  #45  
Old 27.12.2010, 23:12
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

As said, it's not really alcoholism.
In Germany, we call somebody like him a "periodic drunkard" - Quartalssäufer.
(If he really stays sober in between, that is).

Of course, this is no consolation.
There is nothing that can be done from others, from outside.
Only he himself can change something.
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  #46  
Old 28.12.2010, 00:47
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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I agree that Î wouldn't class this sort of once-in-a-while binge drinking as alcoholism.

Moreoever, I don't think the occasional binge is that unhealthy or stupid. It.
Then what is it? Of course it is unhealthy. There is a lot of denial about that too!!! And stupid? Look at the uncontrolled behaviour and/or conversation of anyone who is drunk. Hardly sensible is it?
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Old 28.12.2010, 01:14
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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Then what is it? Of course it is unhealthy. There is a lot of denial about that too!!! And stupid? Look at the uncontrolled behaviour and/or conversation of anyone who is drunk. Hardly sensible is it?
Do you think occasionally loosening control is stupid?

Actually I think it's a bit more unhealthy and silly to remain buttoned up and teetotal.
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  #48  
Old 28.12.2010, 01:39
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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Do you think occasionally loosening control is stupid?

Actually I think it's a bit more unhealthy and silly to remain buttoned up and teetotal.
This arguement is often used - I have heard it a lot, especially from those who do find it hard to enjoy themselves without the aid of alcohol, for whatever reasons. In reality, there are other choices and not everyone needs alcohol to feel relaxed, have fun and enjoy life. I'm having fun.
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  #49  
Old 28.12.2010, 08:19
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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Do you think occasionally loosening control is stupid?

Actually I think it's a bit more unhealthy and silly to remain buttoned up and teetotal.
I don't drink at all and haven't since my teens. I never liked it anyways. Of course, I still use it in cooking because a risotto without white wine is blasphemous at best.

Seriously though, I do ho it up and undo some buttons every once in a while. Plus, I'm the last one left dancing when I party, despite being completely sober.

Fortunately, my friends have the good sense to get wasted, which means they don't notice my appallingly bad dancing. Unfortunately, when I do stupid things, I can't blame it on the booze.
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Old 28.12.2010, 11:38
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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This arguement is often used - I have heard it a lot, especially from those who do find it hard to enjoy themselves without the aid of alcohol, for whatever reasons. In reality, there are other choices and not everyone needs alcohol to feel relaxed, have fun and enjoy life. I'm having fun.
I'm not really sure why you groaned my comment, it's not like I criticized you.

I'm not saying you can't enjoy yourself without alcohol. I'm just saying that there's nothing wrong with occasionally overdoing it. In fact there are some great events promoted on this very web site which are great fun and great social events, but do require some drinking, e.g. Puzzler's magnificent treasure hunts

Yes . . . frequently getting too drunk, or drinking alone etc are dangerous and should be addressed. But not all social drinking should be seen as the start of a dangerous slide. Less puritanism please.
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Old 28.12.2010, 12:12
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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I'm not really sure why you groaned my comment, it's not like I criticized you.

I'm not saying you can't enjoy yourself without alcohol. I'm just saying that there's nothing wrong with occasionally overdoing it. In fact there are some great events promoted on this very web site which are great fun and great social events, but do require some drinking, e.g. Puzzler's magnificent treasure hunts

Yes . . . frequently getting too drunk, or drinking alone etc are dangerous and should be addressed. But not all social drinking should be seen as the start of a dangerous slide. Less puritanism please.
'morning Gastrognome, my groan was not directed personally at you, but rather at the argument that I have heard so many times before. And I am glad that you agree that it is possible to enjoy oneself without alcohol.

Not sure that the fact that the fact that this website ( more accurately , individuals who use the website,) promotes any particular event, is necessarily proof that overdoing the alcohol is not harmfull to the body...

Puritanism? Do you know me? LOL! I have never been accussed of moral rigour before let alone avoided fun, social events, dancing etc, including being a longtime runner with various very social hash house harrier groups around the world.

Drinking alone? Is that more dangerous than drinking when not alone? Hhhmmm, I will ponder upon that one, whilst thinking of various friends who live alone....... but don't want to get too pedantic.
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  #52  
Old 28.12.2010, 12:55
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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'morning Gastrognome, my groan was not directed personally at you, but rather at the argument that I have heard so many times before. And I am glad that you agree that it is possible to enjoy oneself without alcohol.

Not sure that the fact that the fact that this website ( more accurately , individuals who use the website,) promotes any particular event, is necessarily proof that overdoing the alcohol is not harmfull to the body...
I'm not really making a rigorous argument about the harm that an individual binge session can do . . . of course that can damage the heart and the liver, certainly hangovers can be painful and drinking can lead to embarrassing behaviour.

What I am saying is that this really isn't a big deal if you just drink occasionally and if the silliest thing you is slurring 'I think you're really attractive' rather than blowing CHF 60,000 on Cristal, hookers and roulette. In fact, in the latter case you really shouldn't be blaming the alcohol.

Equally, occasionally having a bit to drink is not alcoholism and the dangers getting drunk shouldn't be exaggerated as the inevitable first step on the road to ruin.

And yes, I do think that if you're teetotal you are, for example, missing out on some rather nice wines that are staggering achievements of taste. I don't mind if you offer to drive though.
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  #53  
Old 28.12.2010, 13:05
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

I dont think the problem here is Alcoholism or even blowing money on prostitutes and gambling. The person in questions has an addictive nature and is an adrenaline junkie looking for excitement and kicks.

One good suggestion could be to get this person to take up some extreme sports like paragliding, surfing, snowboarding, skydiving, golf etc. That would divert his attention from seeking cheap thrills in alcohol and Puteras.
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Old 28.12.2010, 13:43
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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I dont think the problem here is Alcoholism or even blowing money on prostitutes and gambling. The person in questions has an addictive nature and is an adrenaline junkie looking for excitement and kicks.

One good suggestion could be to get this person to take up some extreme sports like paragliding, surfing, snowboarding, skydiving, golf etc. That would divert his attention from seeking cheap thrills in alcohol and Puteras.
He does have an addictive nature. Golf might be pushing it a bit though... wayyy to extreme.
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Old 28.12.2010, 13:45
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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He does have an addictive nature. Golf might be pushing it a bit though... wayyy to extreme.
I know, I was reluctant to add it to the list, look what happened to Tiger Woods.
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Old 28.12.2010, 13:59
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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I dont think the problem here is Alcoholism or even blowing money on prostitutes and gambling. The person in questions has an addictive nature and is an adrenaline junkie looking for excitement and kicks.

One good suggestion could be to get this person to take up some extreme sports like paragliding, surfing, snowboarding, skydiving, golf etc. That would divert his attention from seeking cheap thrills in alcohol and Puteras.
This is an very interesting angle on the problem. There is a connection isn;t there? Thanks for bringing it up. (But golf??? That didn't keep Tiger away from the pros'

Gastrognome: I don't particuarly like the taste of wine, seafood, whiskey or steak and kidney pie, so don't generally partake in any of those. I only like beer after mowing the lawn on a hot NZ summer, Sunday afternoon and that beer MUST be cold. However, I will not turn down a plate of vanilla icream covered in baileys, with chocolate raisons added, on the rare occassions that is offered to me.

Yes, I am happy to be the designated driver at any stage. An evening out, with nil alcohol is not a problem for me.
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Old 28.12.2010, 14:02
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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As said, it's not really alcoholism.
In Germany, we call somebody like him a "periodic drunkard" - Quartalssäufer.
(If he really stays sober in between, that is).
Again, you are wrong: coming from a family of alcoholics I can tell you that many alcoholics are in fact periodic drinkers (although alcoholics all of the time). They stay dry for days, weeks, months or even years (dr. Jekyll) with horrific binge drinking periods in between (mr. Hyde) in which they possibly endanger their own and others lives.

These are the most hidden alcoholics as mostly family and friends (who are co-addicts) do everything they can to hide and protect their troubled loved ones during these periods (tragically making the situation worse as taking responsability off the alcoholic takes away the reason to stop drinking).

The difference between occasional drunks and these people is a thin line but the crux is that when they start drinking they cannot stop - the mechanism of 'now i've gone too far' is completely shut off.

Moreover, it is obsessive behaviour in which the 'fun' aspect is missing which makes it different from 'occasionally overdoing it'.

From Meisie's remarks it seems like this person is on the wrong side of the line (especially that he is a totally different person when he drinks and the degree to which she as a good friend worries about him).
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Old 28.12.2010, 14:20
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

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This is an very interesting angle on the problem. There is a connection isn;t there? Thanks for bringing it up. (But golf??? That didn't keep Tiger away from the pros'
I know because I am the same. I can do without alcohol for days and weeks but when I start drinking I cannot stop. The other night I dont even remember how I got home and I had so much alcohol in my system that I was a bit tipsy the next day too.

The only thing that can keep me away from alcohol is something exciting that gives me kicks. Have a strong tendency for getting addicted. The only difference is my addictions dont control me, but I only go for them when Im bored.
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Old 29.12.2010, 11:26
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

I also found this interview to be very informative. Check it out if you can. http://www.democracynow.org/shows/2010/12/24 - Good luck! L
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Old 29.12.2010, 11:35
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Re: Advice on alcoholism

Sounds like your friend has nothing to lose, and everything to gain.

Wikipedia reference-linkIbogaine

Think of Ibogaine as the Etchasketch of the soul.

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Proponents of ibogaine treatment for drug addiction have established formal and informal clinics or self-help groups in Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean, Costa Rica, the Czech Republic, France, Slovenia, the Netherlands, Brazil, South Africa, the United Kingdom and New Zealand, where ibogaine is administered as an experimental compound. Many users of ibogaine report experiencing visual phenomena during a waking dream state, such as instructive replays of life events that led to their addiction, while others report therapeutic shamanic visions that help them conquer the fears and negative emotions that might drive their addiction. It is proposed that intensive counseling, therapy and aftercare during the interruption period following treatment is of significant value. Some individuals require a second or third treatment session with ibogaine over the course of the next 12 to 18 months. A minority of individuals relapse completely into opiate addiction within days or weeks.
Addiction is a terrible thing that can be cured by re-engineering the dark engines that drive them.

Good luck to your friend and good on you for caring.
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