Are you trying to be sardonic?

Tom honestly- I can assure you most people who suffer from depression can't afford it either

Of course not!

Tom

Or their families and loved ones....

Note that being calm and nonplussed does not exclude you from depression, and in fact if you're calm because you're denying feelings, that can create more problems in the long run. But if you don't have it, good for you.

To the OP: sorry about this. It's not fun. But I do admire you for seeking out a diagnosis and talking about it. Lots of different things work for different people. I've dealt with both anxiety and depression, some meds were/are great for me, others not. Likewise some therapists work, others not. Same with supplements. Exercise can help but first you have to feel like going to do it. and in some people, time is a great healer. For me, the right meds worked wonders, and writing helped a lot too. In the end I learned to think differently, too.

Anyway, take care of yourself, take it slow. All the best.

Keith, all the very best to you. Take care and be kind to yourself. I sincerely hope that you will soon be feeling better.

Keith, I am happy to read you did something about your depression. In your case, that's seeing a doctor. I know there are many different approaches but I am just glad that you didn't ignore your symptoms. It's really brave of you to post about it on the forum too.

*big hugs and wishes that you feel good* You deserve it.

Some have learned to be calm in extreme situations. I think it is a very useful skill. Emotional intelligence?
The train crashes. Would you rather be amongst individuals that start directing mobile individuals to the nearest opening, or the screaming ninny shouting "we're all gonna die". I don't think it needs to be a sign of depression, or of denying your emotions.
Said "calm, directive" person will at some stage in the future be in a position to scream like said ninny.. but at that time, it is inappropriate and not very useful.

Depression, from what I have seen in others, is a very debilitating disease, effecting a lot of people around the person who is suffering the disease.

Keith, I hope you have the opportunity to contact close (as in emotionally close) relatives about this. It is a time when you need the people who love you most. Allow them to love you too- even if you don't feel its deserved. Love never is, you just do

Dear Keith,

Someone earlier posted about embracing it - and I agree.

Its a crippling sickness and seriously ignore everyone who dont believe that its truly one and its for the weak, because it isnt. It can bring you the darkest, loneliest places but if it helps, remember that you are not alone.

My best advice is to do everything your doctor says - take your medication and do your follow ups religiously. Get a support network with the help of a few trusted friends and family. From personal experience, if it helps, bring your OH/ trusted family member to the doctor's/psychiatrist's appointment with you. Depressed people arent peaches to be with and the illness can test the family’s love. They too need help in understanding what you're going through to aide your recovery.

Dont be disheartened if some days are worse than others. Baby steps. And bang out a post on here if you feel like. Sometimes it helps to just put how you feel on paper.

I wish you strength.

Hi,

Another person posting to say that I admire you having recognised there was a problem, got a diagnosis and are accepting that diagnosis.

I've been on both sides of the fence - have had several severe bouts of depression myself, but have also met people worse off than me in hospital... and also have watched a family member struggle with depression (but refuse to admit it, to take meds regularly etc.).

At the moment I'm doing a cognitive behavioural therapy group on 'Taming Depression' which I'm finding very useful... I would share here but I know not everyone finds the theory useful (which is what we've covered so far). Also I'm dealing with the aftermath of a migraine and my fingers can't seem to hit the right keys.

But if you'd like to know more about the theoretical aspects, feel free to PM me.

My late wife had a few bad years in the 90s, her depression started in such a way that the doctor saw immediately what was wrong - she simply refused to get up one morning. We tried everything, and, I have to say this, most of the professional help she was subjected to, both here and in England - was hopeless. Pills, pills, pills. These people deal in things they themselves don't understand. You need to find the RIGHT person for your heart. This is an illness that has to be treated with compassion and understanding in the foreground. After finding such a person she became quite stable and could enjoy life again - but it was always there, peeping through in many ways.

Oddly enough it cleared completely up within hours after she visited a farmer in the Jura who did nothing other than place his hands on her head for about ten minutes. We then spent two qcalming weeks on a boat on the Norfolk Broads at her request and she never looked back.

Leave no stone unturned.

Hi Keith,

Sorry to hear about your diagnosis At least you now know what it is and can, hopefully, get the right treatment, and things will improve and you will feel better. I've known a number of friends who've struggled with depression for various reasons -- some clinical, some situational, some due to hormonal changes -- and have tried different medications/supplements, therapies, life changes, etc., all with varying degrees of success. Whatever happens, don't give up. You will find whatever is the right thing for you.

My very best wishes to you!

Sorry your going such a bad time.
My Hubby had a really bad time 4 years ago with depression (when I say bad I mean really bad) he managed to get through it by going to a day clinic in Kloten
Could really recommend it (they wanted to put my hubby in clinic where he couldnt come home, which he didnt want) you do a course for 2 months or so where you go everyday, you do sport, group therapy, painting etc. If you want the name PM me.
Wishing you and your family lots of strength to get through this

It's a good thing to come forward and not to suck it in! I know the opposite from one of my family members. He was always calm, polite and positive about almost everything, the last person you'd expect to be depressed. Then one day, without any specific incident having occurred, he suddenly had a psychotic break, was admitted to a mental hospital and diagnosed with severe depression, had to stay there for a longer time. If you start early enough to take it serious, there is a better chance it won't go that far.

I am truly sorry to read that, depression can be nasty and I hope you recover soon. It is doable, and now that you have a diagnosis and you have accepted this, I would really recommend to follow the doctor's instructions to the T, best wishe to you!

For all expats who first got your depression in Switzerland, do you think you would have also become depressed while living in your home country?

That's a good point! I think, everyone who has a depression going on but isn't aware of it, has developed over the years some everyday rituals/routine to avoid confrontation with the innermost self. If you head to a new destination, there is a good chance you won't be able to keep up with this routine in your new environment. Therefore your protective barrier breaks and all of the sudden your depression becomes evident to yourself. So there's probably a much higher chance not to become but to realise you're depressed, when you're an expat.

Probably impossible to say - but perhaps working with a new health system can make it more difficult to get a diagnosis, to find resources to help. Regardless of what triggered the illness - in one's own country one has a better idea of where to go so earlier intervention is more likely.

When moving to a new country/culture, much gets swept under the rug or written off as 'adjustment'.

A large problem is the isolation that is part of many expats' lives. If one is without friends or family here, even if one has found appropriate medical care the lack of day-today support is a barrier to recovery.

And of course if one is completely isolated here there is no one to even notice that something may be wrong, and to help you get help. Expat life can put quite a bit of stress on a marriage in the best of times; the person one usually turns to for support, one's partner, has his/her hands full with new responsibilities and night not notice that something is wrong, or might not not have the time or resources to provide support.

Add to that the language barrier that some face...

If one is here on an expat assignment, the prevailing corporate culture might influence one's private life to a larger degree. If that is the case, showing anything that could be construed as weakness - even in the private arena - can impact your, or your partner's, career. The unwritten rule is that one puts on a brave face, does the 'Showtime!' routine... and battles one's demons in private. Not a healthy situation.

And of course one often doesn't recognize depression for what it is - rather ascribing the pain to external factors specific to the new country.

So... I have no idea to what extent being away from one's own country or culture can be considered a cause, but certainly being a 'stranger in a strange land' does have an impact on how one may deal with the condition.

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Wishing you all the best, Keith.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all your kind words and advice. I feel as if a great preasure has now been released just by telling people and by not hiding it and being fearful of what people think.

The worst thing about this illness is that people just tend to think what a carry on about nothing we all have bad days.
They dont realise its an illness even if you dont have anything bandaged up