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  #81  
Old 04.03.2015, 04:46
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Third Culture Kids

I read this article- thought it was excellent.

For me it hits a nerve concerning the hidden grief of children for a culture misplaced; a sense of incongruity with society.
Most children go through an identity crisis, but when you are a mixture of cultures and homelands it maybe difficult to find anyone to relate to; no role models to be found. Children may feel 'different' on multiple levels

Hopefully more will be written on this subject, at least this is a start.

http://iwasanexpatwife.com/2013/01/1...cks-sometimes/
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  #82  
Old 04.03.2015, 05:54
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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I read this article- thought it was excellent.

For me it hits a nerve concerning the hidden grief of children for a culture misplaced; a sense of incongruity with society.
Most children go through an identity crisis, but when you are a mixture of cultures and homelands it maybe difficult to find anyone to relate to; no role models to be found. Children may feel 'different' on multiple levels

Hopefully more will be written on this subject, at least this is a start.

http://iwasanexpatwife.com/2013/01/1...cks-sometimes/
I grew up travelling a fair bit, long before any of these nice words such as third culture kids had been coined, but I guess I must have been one. Neither did we get international schools or and other silk glove treatment. If we complained about the local school being too difficult, my parents said just try harder.

I think it was being confronted with different stupid rules in different countries that started me thinking a lot about the meaning of laws and rules and ultimately of the meaning of government. Different people, most of them doubtlessly well-meaning (but some clearly not so) trying to help us but in reality only making things worse got me thinking about the role of authority in interfering with people's lives and the sum of all this is that I became critical of petty governmentisms and nanny-statehoods. I hated it for example when a teacher told other kids to be friendly with me. I wanted them to be friendly with me on their own terms, not because the teacher told them to. I think its something other kids never understood, and indeed other adults still don't understand.
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  #83  
Old 04.03.2015, 07:57
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Re: Third Culture Kids

It is a heartbreaking thing to see sometimes. I am a teacher at an international school and I often speak with students about this topic. Those who have been in and out of schools and whose families have moved a few times really sometimes struggle with their identity. As for myself, I have come to realise that I don't feel quite at home here, but when I go back to my home country, I also do not feel quite at home there anymore either. Feels like loss some times. Expat life I guess. But oh, what adventures there are to be had.
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  #84  
Old 04.03.2015, 08:24
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Re: Third Culture Kids

I think it puts a heavy burden on parents and may forge tighter bonds. Tighter bonds can be good; or bad-if they become shackles. Non-immediate nuclear family members or new partners may feel left 'outside the circle'.

Also, if you are a partner of a culturally-mixed person, it can take longer to get to know the object of your affection, especially if your lover is not open and willing to explain themselves
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Old 04.03.2015, 08:58
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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Hopefully more will be written on this subject, at least this is a start.
There are books on TCKs. You're probably a TCK. I'm a TCK. Most of EF would be TCK, if they were only kids.
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Old 04.03.2015, 09:13
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Re: 31 Signs You’re A Third Culture Kid

My kids are second generation TCK on their mother's side. We're close, but not closed family, so they all have a strong sense of identity and are well integrated in the local society.
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Old 04.03.2015, 11:15
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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I have come to realise that I don't feel quite at home here, but when I go back to my home country, I also do not feel quite at home there anymore either. Feels like loss some times. Expat life I guess. But oh, what adventures there are to be had.
Its common. This is an essay on that condition from Utne Reader in 2000. It predates the TCK coinage. I found it comforting to read when I was grappling with it, knowing that I wasn't the only one:
Stranger in a strange land

It is a lot more difficult as a child, during the formative years, when still struggling for identity. I think loneliness is the most difficult part. Hopefully, it should be more manageable, and it really can be quite enjoyable as an adult.

For me, its actually compatible with my Christian convictions. The model being Abraham, who left his home and wandered into the desert. And also living out the fact that we are just travellers through this world, and this is not our final home.
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Old 04.03.2015, 12:08
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Re: 31 Signs You’re A Third Culture Kid

I 'discovered' I had been a TCK (now I'm an ATCK, or Adult TCK, according to lingo), when I was doing my Masters - and I actually ended up writing my thesis on the subject. While I don't define myself exclusively by the concept, it did provide a language to describe certain challenges, like the difficulties of answering "where are you from", when my mother's origin, my father's origin, where I was born, where I grew up, where I went to school, my passport nationalities, are all different countries.

I haven't read through this whole thread so this might be redundant, but for a good book on the subject, (basically THE book), which also describes the spectrum of the experiences of growing up in multicultural settings, have a look at
Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds.
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  #89  
Old 04.03.2015, 18:49
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Re: 31 Signs You’re A Third Culture Kid

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I 'discovered' I had been a TCK (now I'm an ATCK, or Adult TCK, according to lingo), when I was doing my Masters - and I actually ended up writing my thesis on the subject. While I don't define myself exclusively by the concept, it did provide a language to describe certain challenges, like the difficulties of answering "where are you from", when my mother's origin, my father's origin, where I was born, where I grew up, where I went to school, my passport nationalities, are all different countries.

I haven't read through this whole thread so this might be redundant, but for a good book on the subject, (basically THE book), which also describes the spectrum of the experiences of growing up in multicultural settings, have a look at
Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds.
Thanks- I'll share with my TCK's ( now ATCKs)!
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Old 04.03.2015, 19:00
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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Its common. This is an essay on that condition from Utne Reader in 2000. It predates the TCK coinage. I found it comforting to read when I was grappling with it, knowing that I wasn't the only one:
Stranger in a strange land

It is a lot more difficult as a child, during the formative years, when still struggling for identity. I think loneliness is the most difficult part. Hopefully, it should be more manageable, and it really can be quite enjoyable as an adult.

For me, its actually compatible with my Christian convictions. The model being Abraham, who left his home and wandered into the desert. And also living out the fact that we are just travellers through this world, and this is not our final home.
I think it is easier to transition if you have support systems- like a religious belief. I left my kids alone to choose their own, now one is Reformiert and one atheist, turned agnostic (perhaps still reforming?). I sought out like-minded Quakers, then became Muslim, now in the US I am a reformed Muslim/agnsotic! Hubby stays away from religion, he says real scientist are atheists. But suppose our children as TCKs had become prey to ISIS role models .
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Old 04.03.2015, 19:49
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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... Hubby stays away from religion, he says real scientist are atheists.
I thought real scientists always question everything and never have a definitive answer
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Old 04.03.2015, 22:26
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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I think it is easier to transition if you have support systems- like a religious belief. I left my kids alone to choose their own, now one is Reformiert and one atheist, turned agnostic (perhaps still reforming?). I sought out like-minded Quakers, then became Muslim, now in the US I am a reformed Muslim/agnsotic! Hubby stays away from religion, he says real scientist are atheists. But suppose our children as TCKs had become prey to ISIS role models .
Ironically, TCK was first identified predominantly amongst children of missionaries. Maybe your husband is just trying to tell YOU something.

There are real advantages TCKs have they may not have fully realized yet.
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  #93  
Old 04.03.2015, 22:56
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Re: Third Culture Kids

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I thought real scientists always question everything and never have a definitive answer
This should cheer you up-Stephen Hawkins https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7L7VTdzuY7Y

Last edited by Hoppy; 04.03.2015 at 23:01. Reason: Addition
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  #94  
Old 04.03.2015, 23:03
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Re: 31 Signs You’re A Third Culture Kid

Also Einstein-
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