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  #81  
Old 20.06.2015, 18:02
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I really hope it is not a beach volleyball team.
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  #82  
Old 20.06.2015, 18:22
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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on a slightly more serious note, why not just talk to the new/assistant coach..get an understanding of their approach, skills, method, experience etc. as thats what counts and also gives you an opportunity to judge the character of the person if you are concerned.
How would that help? OP has clearly made their mind up already.
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  #83  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:05
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Re: Transexual as a coach

The role of a parent (maybe even stronger for a father) is to protect their offspring from danger, which in practice also means uncomfortable and unusual events and situations. It is a natural instinct. For some people this situation is clearly a red flag, for others not so. Times may have changed but not for everybody and this is also ok.

In this situation my father would react differently to me, and also my son who is 14 would react differently to me, it is also a generational thing because of the environment that we grew up in.

My father would react badly and immediately, I have to think about it as it is not something I am totally comfortable with but I understand that it should be ok, and for my son it probably isn't an issue.

Unfortunately we cannot just click our fingers and change the habits and prejudice of 50 years, however uncomfortable other people may feel about it.

It takes time and understanding, and the OP needs more of both, but that's OK and I don't think he is the only one.
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  #84  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:08
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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The role of a parent (maybe even stronger for a father) is to protect their offspring from danger, which in practice also means uncomfortable and unusual events and situations. It is a natural instinct. For some people this situation is clearly a red flag, for others not so. Times may have changed but not for everybody and this is also ok.

In this situation my father would react differently to me, and also my son who is 14 would react differently to me, it is also a generational thing because of the environment that we grew up in.
I think it is as much a cultural thing as a generational thing - the OP isn't from Europe - she's from across the pond where even showing a breast in public becomes a national debate.

The only other person who appears to (visibly) take her side on this thread is also from the same country.
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  #85  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:17
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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I think it is as much a cultural thing as a generational thing - the OP isn't from Europe - she's from across the pond where even showing a breast in public becomes a national debate.

The only other person who appears to (visibly) take her side on this thread is also from the same country.
I think maybe more people can see the "problem" but nowadays you are not allowed to voice your concerns for fear of being labelled.

Like I said, in the same situation I would need to think about it too. Whether it is generational or cultural I can't say for sure, but it is not easy for me to accept it automatically, although I did know somebody who had gone through this whole process socially for a couple of years and I never had a problem with that person.
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  #86  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:20
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Re: Transexual as a coach

OP, it is "transsexual".

No matter what you think of your kid's current, future or past life, you need to accept that you cannot (and should not) control everything that happens in it.
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  #87  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:27
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I've worked with a lot of transsexuals in a past job and to be honest, they're pretty normal in the grand scheme of things.

It's really not a big deal.
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  #88  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:30
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Re: Transexual as a coach



Tom
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  #89  
Old 20.06.2015, 19:32
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Re: Transexual as a coach

Actually there's a lot in your industry...
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  #90  
Old 20.06.2015, 20:01
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Re: Transexual as a coach

Transsexual and transvestites are not the same thing.
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  #91  
Old 20.06.2015, 20:05
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Transsexual and transvestites are not the same thing.
Indeed.

"I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania"

Tom
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  #92  
Old 20.06.2015, 20:35
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Transsexual and transvestites are not the same thing.
They're both just labels, together with a dozen or so more that are used in similar fields, and in practice none of them have a single definitive meaning. Yes, it shows a lack of understanding and perhaps a level of prejudice to use them interchangeably (but this was just a song reference, so let's not get carried away) but these days I think it's less likely to cause offence than it used to be.

The trouble with specific labels is that (groups of) people who feel that the label fits them tend to try and take ownership of it, which often ends up with them excluding and even discriminating against others whose interests/feelings/beliefs are often overlapping but don't quite 'fit' their world. For example it wasn't accepted by some in 1980s UK the gay community that one could be bisexual - they firmly asserted that you were either gay or straight, with nothing in between, which is pretty much the opposite of current thinking.
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  #93  
Old 20.06.2015, 21:35
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Does he take showers with them?

Tom
That's low, even by your standards
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  #94  
Old 20.06.2015, 21:40
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I have 3 good friends who are transsexual- 2 who have had a full reversal, 1 who has not as it was too late ... neither of them are sexually predatory. Many 'straight' guys are ... some of them rapists and peodophiles- why do they seem safer to you, somehow?

Last edited by Odile; 20.06.2015 at 22:06.
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Old 20.06.2015, 21:57
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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8-12 is quite late to have not already been told about such things imo. My kids have known about LGBT for as long as they have known about gender, relationships and marriage; it was always explained at the same time.
I don't think at that age it is late! It really depends on the environment where you live/ socialise. I have not seen any LGBT people around us, so it is likely that my kids may go till their early/mid teens before we get the question! I think I may have seen one lady, who used to be a man (I think it was in Baden( but my kids did not even bat an eyelid. To them, she was a woman wearing a dress.
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  #96  
Old 20.06.2015, 21:58
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I never had you down as one of the beige mac brigade, Adrian!

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I'm using a Mac; I don't appreciate your prejudice.
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Old 20.06.2015, 22:02
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I've nursed two men going through the transition, the first was around 25 and having his breast implants removed as he had changed his mind, he was a star!!

The second was on MAU the guy had taken an overdose due to the stress of it all.
Also one head of nursing at the hospital I trained at was a transsexual who had completed the change , she was a completely normal person.

My point is that I've had contact with three , the first was happily screwed up from it all , the second was a mess and the third was fine.


None of them were strange or weird.

I've nursed many people who've attempted to take their own lives sadly, all for different reasons. People are people at the end of the day and I'm sure that the new coach has been thoroughly vetted out by the teams managers.

If you are concerned speak to the other coach.

I understand your concerns and I just hope that it all works out . It must be very difficult for the new coach and they must be brave.
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  #98  
Old 20.06.2015, 22:32
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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... I'm sure that the new coach has been thoroughly vetted out by the teams managers.
I'm betting not actually. This is Switzerland and authorities tend to shy away from difficult decisions. They are more likely to take the line of "nobody complained yet so where is the problem?". I would very much doubt if any thought had been given to this at a high level.
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Old 20.06.2015, 22:38
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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That's low, even by your standards
On the contrary, it's a very valid question.

So, what's the answer?

Meanwhile, "Myra Breckinridge" is one of my favorite books.

Tom
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Old 20.06.2015, 22:39
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Re: Transexual as a coach

You are the OP and ICMFP!

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Indeed.

"I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania"

Tom
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