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  #101  
Old 20.06.2015, 23:07
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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The only other person who appears to (visibly) take her side on this thread is also from the same country.
are you being intentionally ironic?



to the OP - let your daughter make up her own mind. if she is uncomfortable at all about the situation, I am sure she will tell you.
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  #102  
Old 20.06.2015, 23:48
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I can not understand how this thread has lasted 6 pages.

I know plenty of paedophiles and not a single one of them is into Volleyball.

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  #103  
Old 21.06.2015, 00:31
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Re: Transexual as a coach

Jim'll Fix It.

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So, what's the answer?
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  #104  
Old 21.06.2015, 01:07
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I worked with a transsexual once. She was probably one of the nicest people
I have ever known. I used to get quite angry/embarrassed/protective when other colleagues (generally men) made jokes about her.

I only ever knew her as a woman, it must have been a bit strange for those that worked with her when she was a man as well.
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  #105  
Old 21.06.2015, 09:04
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Re: Transexual as a coach

Just an observation: it seems like the majority of people on this thread have a transsexual friend or two....some even a few of them.
I don't want to imply anything, just wonder if this is statistically possible. Anyway, whatever.

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My 10 year old daughter joined a local volleyball club last year for 8-12 year olds. Last week, without any notification, the coach brought in a transsexual to help train the team. The person is currently in transition and will be undergoing the operation next year. I believe the person is under psychological evaluation. This person will now be helping train the team.

Am I asking to much to be informed when there is a new coach ? Is this something that I just have to accept?? What is the norm here in Switzerland?
OP, I think you just have to accept it. Maybe you don't see the benefits of this for the moment, but try to think of future life situations you're daughter will come across with. If she learns to be OK with someone being so different from her/your family/environment now, it will help her immensely later on. It's not for her coach benefit, it's for her own.
P.S. "She" might be a great coach actually, and that should matter more than anything else, unless your daughter doesn't really go there for Volleyball. (only to be with her friends etc etc )

Last edited by greenmount; 21.06.2015 at 09:31.
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  #106  
Old 21.06.2015, 10:22
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Just an observation: it seems like the majority of people on this thread have a transsexual friend or two....some even a few of them.
I don't want to imply anything, just wonder if this is statistically possible. Anyway, whatever.
I once met a bloke who claimed to come from Jupiter.

I don't think there's any money to be made in transplanetary surgery, though...
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  #107  
Old 21.06.2015, 10:49
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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I once met a bloke who claimed to come from Jupiter.

I don't think there's any money to be made in transplanetary surgery, though...
I'm actually amused at the amount of PCness on this thread. Most parents have their own prejudices and "no-go areas". Or maybe I'm the only one who comes from a conservative family and whose father was always keeping an eye on his little flower's "entourage" ... (that includes "humiliating" moments for me that we both laughed about later on)
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  #108  
Old 21.06.2015, 10:59
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Just an observation: it seems like the majority of people on this thread have a transsexual friend or two....some even a few of them.
I don't want to imply anything, just wonder if this is statistically possible. Anyway, whatever.
Of course you mean to imply something, else you wouldn't have taken the time to write it. However, using a phrase like statistically possible displays a certain lack of understanding as to how statistics work. They describe probabilities, not possibilities. Thus, stats will never show anything to be impossible.

Anyway, I have no transgender friends whatsoever (that I'm aware of). Couple of gays on both sides of the gender divide, sure, but none crossing it. I do wonder about your use of the term political correctness, though: are you implying that people who respond negatively to the OP's prejudices are doing so only out political correctness, and that none of them have genuine compassion for the LBGT community? Or are you stating that people should be allowed to express those prejudices without a counter view being aired?
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  #109  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:01
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Just an observation: it seems like the majority of people on this thread have a transsexual friend or two....some even a few of them.
I don't want to imply anything, just wonder if this is statistically possible. Anyway, whatever.
That's because the people who have transsexual friends or work colleagues, and experience of them are the ones replying to this thread - and on the whole they are positive experiences.

Yes, I worked with three in one office.

Perhaps we need more people like you replying:

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I'm actually amused at the amount of PCness on this thread.
It's not PC. It's the way it is.

And...

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Or maybe I'm the only one who comes from a conservative family and whose father was always keeping an eye on his little flower's "entourage" ... (that includes "humiliating" moments for me that we both laughed about later on)
Yes, we need more people like you on this thread. No transsexual friends or work colleagues but you still need to add your piece about coming from a conservative family etc. (whatever that is supposed to imply).
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  #110  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:02
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Just an observation: it seems like the majority of people on this thread have a transsexual friend or two....some even a few of them.
I don't want to imply anything, just wonder if this is statistically possible. Anyway, whatever.
I have to admit that I have no transexual friends but I feel a lot of sympathy for Bruce Jenner.
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  #111  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:02
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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I'm actually amused at the amount of PCness on this thread. Most parents have their own prejudices and "no-go areas"...
I'm amused for a number of reasons. One that someone could possibly start a thread like this without expecting to provoke a group attack. Another that I'm sure some of the more self-righteous participants would have, in earlier decades, thought Gumpy's reaction to be right and proper.

It's possible to be obnoxiously PC and still right.

Rather than vilify people who hold objectionable opinions, it would be better to engage them in the hope of making them think, and even change their mind. Unfortunately, certain sections of the community are so convinced of the rightness of their outlook that they consider even talking to their opponents in a civilised manner to be tantamount to condoning them. The hypocritical intolerance of the "tolerant". Fortunately, other members do seem to, in this thread, adopted the educative approach.
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  #112  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:04
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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I'm actually amused at the amount of PCness on this thread. Most parents have their own prejudices and "no-go areas". Or maybe I'm the only one who comes from a conservative family and whose father was always keeping an eye on his little flower's "entourage" ... (that includes "humiliating" moments for me that we both laughed about later on)
PCness? Not seeing much, what I see are comments from people who are amused and/or simply don't get the problem, perhaps a sign of society moving on.
I wonder however what kind of reactions this thread would generate on a forum with people of "simpler means"
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  #113  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:14
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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I'm actually amused at the amount of PCness on this thread...
I've been following this thread since the start, and I guess I am not that surprised. When you think about it, EF is largely comprised of expats - folks that tend to take a less traditional view of things and get out of their comfort zones to experience something new. I wouldn't say we're a bunch of bleeding-heart liberals or anything, but we're a pretty open bunch.

As for the OP's situation, my first thought about the hair, nails and makeup discussions was that the new coach is just trying to make small talk and become friends with the girls. Many girls start to be very interested in that stuff in the age range of 8-12. If she's getting into the details of how the transition from man to woman will occur maybe that's a bit TMI. But if it's small talk and the rest is about volleyball, I think it's fine.

Kids are adaptable and open. They don't need to know all the specifics to understand that people are different. They do need to know that they are loved and safe. Having a transgender coach doesn't make your child any less loved and safe, imo.
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  #114  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:14
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Of course you mean to imply something, else you wouldn't have taken the time to write it. However, using a phrase like statistically possible displays a certain lack of understanding as to how statistics work. They describe probabilities, not possibilities. Thus, stats will never show anything to be impossible.

Anyway, I have no transgender friends whatsoever (that I'm aware of). Couple of gays on both sides of the gender divide, sure, but none crossing it. I do wonder about your use of the term political correctness, though: are you implying that people who respond negatively to the OP's prejudices are doing so only out political correctness, and that none of them have genuine compassion for the LBGT community? Or are you stating that people should be allowed to express those prejudices without a counter view being aired?
I'll shortly answer to only one question: I'm implying that OP has his/her own concerns and people dismissed them in a way that makes me wonder if they're here solely because of their compassion or because they felt the urge to preach tolerance and open-mindedness only to elevate their "status". If they're for compassion here (but then again, it wouldn't be necessary to emphasise that you have friends from a certain group, as compassion should go to any group that is different from us and has nothing to do with how close we feel to a certain group's issues), it is obvious you can't preach compassion by treating OP in a totally un-"compassionate" way.
We don't have to agree with each other, in fact I'd be worried for myself if we do.
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  #115  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:17
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Of course you mean to imply something, else you wouldn't have taken the time to write it. However, using a phrase like statistically possible displays a certain lack of understanding as to how statistics work. They describe probabilities, not possibilities. Thus, stats will never show anything to be impossible.
Exactly. Coincidence, or perhaps some of us have less traditional groups of friends and entourage. I spent the whole day yesterday with a transsexual friend actually. She was a local official, married with children until about 10 years ago. She Posted on her FB page the other day a video of an interview with Jenner's x wife, and how moving that was. The other was my brother's ex's son- who became a daughter with full reversion aged 20- very young and un-usual- and in her case, the only transsexual I've ever known of who is totally and absolutely convincing as a woman, physically, her voice, face and the usual tell-tale 'culprit' feet and hands. Nobody would ever guess. She is happily married to a man.

As said, the 3rd never had the courage to admit to herself and mainly to her very domineering father how she felt- and by the time father died, and she had a massive breakdown -it was too late as she was then about 60. She finally has managed to come to terms with herself- but with so many regrets she didn't stand up to her father and went through the therapy and reversal. Born in the mid 1940s- it was just not possible then.

Believe me or not- is totally irrelevant to me.

Greenmount, of course it is normal for a father/parents to have concerns about the safety of their children. Now if this 'transsexual' behaves outrageously, wears clothing, jewellery or make-up totally unsuitable for sport training, etc, etc- then it would be normal to address this with the manager of the club- but not because the person happens to be trans, per se.
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  #116  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:18
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Yes, we need more people like you on this thread. No transsexual friends or work colleagues but you still need to add your piece about coming from a conservative family etc. (whatever that is supposed to imply).
Oh dear! Is Greenmount not reading from the Little Red Book?

Send her away for re-education! There's no place for heterodoxy on EF!
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  #117  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:22
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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Believe me or not- is totally irrelevant to me.
... so irrelevant you just made a post all about it!
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  #118  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:23
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Re: Transexual as a coach

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I'll shortly answer to only one question: I'm implying that OP has his/her own concerns and people dismissed them in a way that makes me wonder if they're here solely because of their compassion or because they felt the urge to preach tolerance and open-mindedness only to elevate their "status".
Wow, you do have a vivid imagination, don't you?

Ever heard of Occam's Razor?
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  #119  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:24
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Re: Transexual as a coach

So what does the acceptable list of concerns for one's children include?

Race
Nationality
Handicap
Sexual orientation
Religion

.... No Red Book here.... but I had a dream, that we had got beyond, somehow, judging people and their acceptability according to the above. PC - BS!

If that person behaves in an unacceptable manner, whatever the above or not- then it needs dealing with, of course. One of the young teachers at a school where I taught came out about 6 years after starting there. He was a Year 6 teacher (children aged 10) and the uprorar from some parents was shocking. We all stood firm for him, management, union and Governors together, and the majority of the parents (in the 80s) he is still senior teacher there and Head of IT, and a brilliant teacher, loved by all.
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  #120  
Old 21.06.2015, 11:25
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Re: Transexual as a coach

I was going to say I don't know any transgender folks, but then realised I actually know two (one of each). I'd forgotten about it, they're just a couple of people I know.
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