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Old 24.10.2008, 20:57
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what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Hi All,
I will start in November my new job. I will work full time and right in Novemebr my partner will be travelling. I am somehow worried if my daughter (almost 11 months) will get sick during this time. I will not be able to take her to the daycare and since I am just starting this new job, I dont feel like I can take off right at the beginning (although I know it's my right to do so).
Unfortunately we do not have relatives living close by that could help and all our friends are working too. what are the possibilities around (red cross, spitex, ..), what would you reccomend us?
Thank you for your advices.
Sally
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Old 24.10.2008, 21:16
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Well, I am afraid to say that if my 11 month old child was sick there is no way I would even consider trying to palm them off on anyone.
In my opinion - they come FIRST before your job. It is your responsibility to care for your child if they are poorly especially at that age.
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Old 24.10.2008, 21:44
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Maybe someone on this forum might be an "on call emergency" nanny for the right pay...

The Red Cross and the Kinder Spitex are not going to help you. They assist in chronically ill cases...

Switzerland is not really set up to encourage Women with small babies to work... I suspect you will struggle finding someone under these circumstances and you might just have to accept that you'll have to take the day off work.

If you're german is any good you could also try putting up an advert on this site:

http://www.liliput.ch/

Good Luck

Last edited by Lynn; 24.10.2008 at 21:51. Reason: adding a link
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Old 24.10.2008, 22:11
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Maybe you can try to find someone that can look after your child for a couple of hours? It is usually easier than to find someone for the whole day. That way you can go in to work and sort out the most urgent issues and the rest maybe you can do from home?

Also it may be good to prepare yourself to be able to work from home when this happens. Make sure you have phone and laptop connections set up etc.

And when your husband is home, I would suggest that you split the days in half so that you stay home half day each. That way both of you can work a couple of hours each day.
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Old 25.10.2008, 05:13
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

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Well, I am afraid to say that if my 11 month old child was sick there is no way I would even consider trying to palm them off on anyone.
In my opinion - they come FIRST before your job. It is your responsibility to care for your child if they are poorly especially at that age.
I think it's unfair that your slapping this woman with strong words when she's just being truthful and looking for support. She wouldn't have wrote this if she wasn't very nervous and concerned about being alone in a country with her partner away and starting a new job and leaving her child.

Last edited by Oldhand; 25.10.2008 at 15:29. Reason: Repeating myself
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Old 25.10.2008, 06:54
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Under Swiss law I think you are allowed to take 3 days off work each time your child is ill.
I have been in your situation on a few occasions and I have used the Red Cross when my kids are ill - not with anything serious but enough to keep them from attending the local garderie. The Red Cross is an excellent service but it can be expensive (linked to salaries). If you pay an additional amount on your health insurance (above the compulsory level) then your insurance may pay for this service up to about 250 CHF. If you are considering using the Red Cross it is worth contacting them in advance as setting up your file can take a while and you won't want to be doing this while you are stressing on the morning your child is ill! That way you can also ask them about the service in your area and the severity of a child's illness before they agree to sending someone out.
Hope this helps!
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Old 25.10.2008, 07:12
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

God protect us(we need all the help we can get) from the perfect Parent who, given the first opportunity, will jump on your back and slap you repeatedly about the head. The answer is to carry a very big stick to beat them off, I've mine for 4 years now works a treat. The perfect parent is usually to be found raising a few psychopaths and possibly a serial killer and the reason: too busy telling the rest of us what to do.
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Old 25.10.2008, 08:52
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

BTW, I also know that some health insurances offer this service as extra. Might be worth checking out.
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Old 25.10.2008, 13:34
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

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God protect us(we need all the help we can get) from the perfect Parent who, given the first opportunity, will jump on your back and slap you repeatedly about the head. The answer is to carry a very big stick to beat them off, I've mine for 4 years now works a treat. The perfect parent is usually to be found raising a few psychopaths and possibly a serial killer and the reason: too busy telling the rest of us what to do.

I know what it is like to be a working parent with all the stresses that go with it and you seem to have missed my point.

If Sally's baby is not well enough to go to daycare the last thing she needs is to be separated from a familiar face when she is unwell plus it would be equally stressful for Sally aswell.
I did not profess to be "the perfect parent" and have raised three balanced children who are certainly not psychopaths but very worthwhile members of society.
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Old 25.10.2008, 13:46
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

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I know what it is like to be a working parent with all the stresses that go with it and you seem to have missed my point.

If Sally's baby is not well enough to go to daycare the last thing she needs is to be separated from a familiar face when she is unwell plus it would be equally stressful for Sally aswell.
I did not profess to be "the perfect parent" and have raised three balanced children who are certainly not psychopaths but very worthwhile members of society.
So you're referring to "Balanced" then, why don't you give Sally the same courtesy and stop judging what she should or shouldn't do.. and I would reckon that Sally is the best judge of her own child and not you.
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Old 25.10.2008, 17:28
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

If your daughter happens to be sick, explain the situation to your manager and take a day off. Your manager is a human being and should be capable of understanding.
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Old 26.10.2008, 10:26
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

I agree. As a mom, leaving a healthy child in someone else's care is hard enough. The stress of what to do when they are sick and you need your job is even worse. If you have a problem taking a day off, I agree that time sharing with your husband where possible is helpful. Mine usually has back to back meetings all day, so that is not an option for me. I used to sometimes negotiate with my employer to work the time back either broken up during the week or on a Saturday if I was unable to work from home when my first child was little. But guys, let's not "sling mud" please. Sometimes people just phrase their well meant response wrong and intend no harm.
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Old 26.10.2008, 10:58
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

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Hi All,
I will start in November my new job. I will work full time and right in Novemebr my partner will be travelling. I am somehow worried if my daughter (almost 11 months) will get sick during this time. I will not be able to take her to the daycare and since I am just starting this new job, I dont feel like I can take off right at the beginning (although I know it's my right to do so).
Unfortunately we do not have relatives living close by that could help and all our friends are working too. what are the possibilities around (red cross, spitex, ..), what would you reccomend us?
Thank you for your advices.
Sally
I think I speak for many members here who, like you, are trying to balance work and family life and are not surrounded by extended family. In your home country, you may have the support of a parent, or a sibling to call on in situations like this. For many here that option just doesn't exist. Babies and children are not just sick for one day, it can be days, even a week or more. This is why daycare is, in my opinion, not the best option if you do not have a flexible work schedule and an instant alternative to daycare.

Rather than groan at you, which I assume others have done so because they don't think you have your priorities in order, I would like to offer you some suggestions:

Find an au pair or a babysitter to come to your home, or find someone to share a nanny with. Another possibility is to find a neighbour, possibly a stay at home mom or someone who has older children who can help you out in a pinch. Put a notice up locally that you are looking for someone. You just never know who might see it.

Some daycares are stricter than others about under what circumstances a child is alllowed to attend. A sick child, especially an infant, needs to be comforted and kept comfortable and a mother is not necessarily the only person who is capable of doing this. Of course, you may feel guilty going to work living a sick child at home, but if you have left your child with a reponsible caregiver, you have no reason to feel you have done anything wrong. Your priority should be seeking medical attention for your child, if need be, ensuring she is settled. If that means taking a few hours off work, or a half day, or a day, so be it.

The three most dreaded words a working mom can hear in the morning is "Mommy I'm Sick." You need a reliable back up plan for these situations. That is how you will be able to manage work and family obligations. It's not easy, but many of use have done it and survived and our children did not suffer.

Good luck with your new job.
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Last edited by Mrs. Doolittle; 26.10.2008 at 17:58.
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Old 26.10.2008, 11:12
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Depending upon where you work it may not be a problem at all, check your work contract. I'm a single parent, when my child is ill then I have to take time off to look after him and my time off is classed as a sick day.
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Old 27.10.2008, 09:38
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

This is a tricky situation. I have two small children who are quite often sick and my husband and I do take time off to stay with them when we do not feel that they can go to daycare, but this is because we work in the public sector and have been in our jobs for a few years so people in the office know us well. I know that it is different when you are just starting a new job, especially if it is in the private sector.

This is how we cope when our children are really sick so often that we can not continue staying at home: we arrange for Red Cross babysitters to come. This is not cheap, but is a very good solution for a few days. And then we ask our mothers to come and spend a few days or weeks with us every 3 months or so. So we have them on stand-by about 4 months per year.

I know that many people can not stand their mothers, let alone their mothers-in-law, for such a long time. I also heard that some grandparents are not so keen on spending long periods of time with their grandchildren. It is a matter of culture also, where we come from families are more tight-knit, so this works without major glitches.

If this is not an option, then you can try with an au-pair or a part-time nanny in addition to daycare but if this is too expensive or your employer is very demanding and you think that the office culture would not tolerate frequent absences, then a full-time nanny is the only solution.

I think that it was unfair to lecture on priorities here. This is not about putting job first but about being able to maintain a balance between one's family and career needs. Which is necessary if you have to (or want to) have both.
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Old 27.10.2008, 09:58
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

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Depending upon where you work it may not be a problem at all, check your work contract. I'm a single parent, when my child is ill then I have to take time off to look after him and my time off is classed as a sick day.
That's exactly how it is classed in our place and our company seems to work from a non-special, run of the mill, kind of work guidelines. When any of the kids of my colleagues or managers are sick the HR company just logs it as an employee sick day. After three days you are supposed to get a note from the child's doctor which goes to HR and everyone is tickety boo.

I'm lucky up to now that my son has had nothing more serious than a two-day bug here and there but you might find when you put your little one into daycare, the first few months can be the worst as they come into contact with all the new bugs of the other kids. After that they are tough as old boots. My 2 year old has had just four minor sick days in the last 6 months compared to a permanent snotty nose punctuated by sporadic runny-bum for his first 4 or 5 months in nursery .

Remember, you aren't the first working person to have kids and you definitely won't be the last and any employee who thinks kids don't get sick is either daft or kidding himself/herself.
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Old 27.10.2008, 10:43
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

thank you for all the replies and for sharing your experiences with me.
I know that it is possible to stay home when the baby is sick, it already happen to me one time in the company where I used to work, and there I had to provide the doctor certificate to show that the baby was sick, even after one day.
Of course if my daugther is sick and I can stay home (although working from home does not seem to be very much considered in the company where I will start working in Nov), I would do so and arrange that my boyfriend come home earlier. But my worries are for that special days when you NEED to be at work and the baby is sick.. so there is where I need to call someone to come over maybe for few hours till I can sort out all I need to do at work.
For that i was interested to know what are the best possibilities, getting in touch with the red cross or spitex or having a baby-sitter who is willing to come from time to time.
anyhow, thanks again for your advices.
cheers,
Sally
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Old 27.10.2008, 16:50
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Hi,

First off I would like to give a big groan to those who chose to hijack this thread with - quite frankly - unhelpful tirades.

Back to the topic...

The Kinderkrippe (crêche) we send our son to is planning to setup a service for the situation where you have a sick child who ordinarily would be sent home. They would then charge extra on top of the normal daily fee and (I believe) a trained nurse would be on hand to help.

In June our little one was too sick to go to Kinderkrippe - he had a temperature and it was a bug doing the rounds which while it did not require treatment from a doctor nevertheless meant he needed a bit of TLC at home - and with the aid of a few 'Zäpfli' (anti-fever medicine) we were able to get his temperature down. As my wife had to be at work that day, I stayed off with him - and as per Article 36 of the employment act - http://www.1eltern.ch/arbeitsrecht_kranke_kinder.php - my employer was duty bound to allow me up to 3 days to care for a sick child.


Cheers,
Nick
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Old 27.10.2008, 16:59
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

Hi,

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Depending upon where you work it may not be a problem at all, check your work contract. I'm a single parent, when my child is ill then I have to take time off to look after him and my time off is classed as a sick day.
Under Article 36 of the Swiss Employment act, you are entitled to up to 3 days per "case of illness" to care for a sick child. The employer can ask you to produce a doctor's note however.

Cheers,
Nick
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Old 27.06.2012, 13:00
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Re: what do when your child is sick and you have to go at work

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That's exactly how it is classed in our place and our company seems to work from a non-special, run of the mill, kind of work guidelines. When any of the kids of my colleagues or managers are sick the HR company just logs it as an employee sick day. After three days you are supposed to get a note from the child's doctor which goes to HR and everyone is tickety boo.

Remember, you aren't the first working person to have kids and you definitely won't be the last and any employee who thinks kids don't get sick is either daft or kidding himself/herself.
Is this still the case? My little one has got chickenpox and the doctor has given me a note to say she must stay home for the next ten days (EDIT: sorry I can't count it's 7 days) I informed my boss and explained that my other half will bring home my laptop tonight so I can still continue to work as and when possible until I go back.

He is less than impressed and says we need to talk when I go back as I am only allowed three days regardless of having a doctor's note.

As my boyfriend is not my girls biological daddy, he can't take time off to help and her biological dad refuses my doctor said Red Cross wouldn't help in this situation as he has "signed me off" and a call to them confirmed this.

I need something concrete to take to work next week to back myself up.

My boss seems to think that I'm taking some kind of free holiday he obviously hasn't had a whingey kid who won't stop scratching and who can't eat much because of blisters in her mouth hanging off his leg! My poor baby

Last edited by mimi1981; 27.06.2012 at 15:35.
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