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Old 16.06.2015, 15:44
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When did you get your s*** together?

I'm 34 and still haven't decided "what I want to be when I grow up" Is that unusual? Is there a point when it would get too late for certain avenues? How does one decide, and is one supposed to be absolutely sure they have made the right choice?
Those of you who got it together more or less straight away, had you always known exactly what you wanted to do?
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Old 16.06.2015, 15:51
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

I think it will be when I have kids...
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Old 16.06.2015, 15:54
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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I think it will be when I have kids...
That would explain why I'm still waiting to become an adult, and I've got quite a few years on you a Pixie!

To be serious, I've never been one for making plans, I've just taken what comes and gone with the flow. Seems to have worked out ok.
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Old 16.06.2015, 15:56
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

Define $h£^?
Define "together"?
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Old 16.06.2015, 15:56
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

Now that I'm retired I know what I would like to have done...
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Old 16.06.2015, 15:59
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

There is no prerequisite in life to get ones shit together. In fact shit changes.

The shit that was important at 24, you don't give a shit about at 34.
And again at 54, there is shit you never even knew existed, and probably wouldn't have been in a position to digest at 24 anyway.

The biochemistry of your brain changes with age too. Which puts you seriously in the shit if you thought things were going to stay the same.

Focus on what you love and what you love to do.

And let others worry about their own shit* - else things get really messy.


*unless they ask for help of course.. in which case, be sure to always have a pack of wet-wipes handy.



Oh.. and remember: It's never to late to have a happy childhood
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Old 16.06.2015, 16:05
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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I'm 34 and still haven't decided "what I want to be when I grow up" Is that unusual? Is there a point when it would get too late for certain avenues? How does one decide, and is one supposed to be absolutely sure they have made the right choice?
Those of you who got it together more or less straight away, had you always known exactly what you wanted to do?
I've always known what I wanted to do, but not the same thing for very long and frequently totally unrealistic

It's too late when you're dead, prior to that it's really just down to your abilities. Yes, some avenues are closed - you'll never be an olympic gymnast; on the other hand in the real world you can probably do most stuff.

If you are happy you made the right choice - until you aren't happy, then you need to make a new choice.
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Old 16.06.2015, 16:24
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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I'm 34 and still haven't decided "what I want to be when I grow up" Is that unusual? Is there a point when it would get too late for certain avenues? How does one decide, and is one supposed to be absolutely sure they have made the right choice?
Those of you who got it together more or less straight away, had you always known exactly what you wanted to do?
Best is to do some orientation about cats.
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Old 16.06.2015, 16:30
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

Rangatiranui- what a great post! In my mid 60s- I now realise there is a lot of sh*t that I cared for, or thought I did, or worry about- that I really wish I had not wasted time on, that is for sure!

All my friends in the Lycée wanted to become teachers (yiiiiikes, not ME) and wanted to get married (treble 100x yiiiikes not ME) and have kids (x1000 and more - yiiikes NOOOOT MEEEE)- So I went to London to begin my adventures around the world. didn't get very far- and 40 years later I was still in the UK, married at 20, 2 kids by age 25, and became a teacher aged 32. Hey ho, and no regrets. Turn left, turn right- make mistakes, pick yourself up, make more mistakes, correct trajectory and get it right from time to time. I used to say to my 6th Formers (aged 16 to 19) - there is NO right choice or WRONG choice- and you often learn a hell a lot more from your mistakes, than from what you get 'right'.

I still don't know what I will do when I grow up- hopefully I never will- and Ive still got a few more adventures up my sleeve before I kick the bucket lol
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Old 16.06.2015, 16:35
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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Best is to do some orientation about cats.
Bu Pixie has a husband and kids; so I think she can skip the "cat lady" job .
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Old 16.06.2015, 16:49
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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Bu Pixie has a husband and kids; so I think she can skip the "cat lady" job .
then there is no need to worry.
go with the flow and enjoy life!
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Old 16.06.2015, 16:58
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

7 May, 1989. Around 1400 if I recall correctly.
At least that is what I tell my OH when she asks the same question.
...often.
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Old 16.06.2015, 17:28
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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I'm 34 and still haven't decided "what I want to be when I grow up" Is that unusual? Is there a point when it would get too late for certain avenues? How does one decide, and is one supposed to be absolutely sure they have made the right choice?
Those of you who got it together more or less straight away, had you always known exactly what you wanted to do?
Yes it does get too late. Too late for the army, etc... You need to find something else in that case. Draw a diagram, and label each avenue with the "must do by xxx date or too late". Start heading down the ones that are about to expire at full speed. If you don't like it stop and try the next one. If you have missed one out then it can't be that important can it?

I think you should just do *SOMETHING*, passionately, and with full commitment. At first things are a bit wiffly waffly, you have no idea, you are not sure if this reall is "it", then it all just clicks.
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Old 16.06.2015, 17:57
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

Don't live for tomorrow but don't live like tomorrow won't happen.

Do more in your life that makes you genuinely happy and be prepared that others won't understand.

Don't try to be happy doing what you think you should do, be happy with the things you want to do.

One thing I learned - perhaps later than I should - is the following:
We all have different ideas of what is important in our lives - it could be money, family, friends, social, home, job, career etc etc. I call these my pots - my home pot might be larger than yours - but your friend pot bigger than mine. There is no judgement between each person's pots.

Each day we are "given" time and we can use that time to do things that will fill each of those pots. For a long time I filled pots that weren't the ones that were important to me - I spent time on/with people that weren't the ones I really wanted in my life - I spent time doing activities that although they may have been enjoyable, didn't make me happy.

When I sat down and reflected on it I had filled the pots that I thought that mattered but not the ones that really did. Once I figured out which pots mattered and started filling them with my time I became a happier person.

I am sure, that over time, the pots change in size, not massively but enough, so that our perspective of what is important alters.

Maybe my "getting my shit together" moment was the moment when I knew which pots I wanted to fill - and was less worried about what pots I should fill to make others happy.
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Old 16.06.2015, 18:03
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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I'm 34 and still haven't decided "what I want to be when I grow up" Is that unusual? Is there a point when it would get too late for certain avenues? How does one decide, and is one supposed to be absolutely sure they have made the right choice?
Those of you who got it together more or less straight away, had you always known exactly what you wanted to do?

"Getting your s*** together" is over-rated. Unpredictable spontaneity is where its at. It will keep you younger longer.
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Old 16.06.2015, 18:08
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

I am also 34 and still getting it together or rather keeping it from falling apart again. I wish I could finally find something I would like to study here. Not in the sense of another degree, but a profession.
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Old 16.06.2015, 18:15
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

About 15 minutes ago, thanks for asking. Feel much better now.
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Old 16.06.2015, 18:23
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

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About 15 minutes ago, thanks for asking. Feel much better now.
thanks for your one liners that make me laugh
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Old 16.06.2015, 18:25
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

i feel like i get a little more sh*t together each day, but i also let some of the sh*t i once had together go each day. in the end i don't really give a sh*t.

otherwise, in terms of knowing what i wanna do with my life- well i did at 28 but then it changed and then i had to change it because we moved here. now i find it most fulling to do my profession half time and to do what brings me joy half time. works for me because it makes me still enjoy my profession doing it only 50% of the time and the other 50 i do what i love and i still just love it because it's not so much of a job that i depend on it. the key is to find what you like and what you're good at and do a bit of both.
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Old 16.06.2015, 18:37
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Re: When did you get your s*** together?

Everytime I may feel like I got my S*** together I realize Im not nearly there, and I guess is what keeps me going.
I thought I had it together when I opened my own business in mexico at age 21. After leaving that business for my ex, a divorce and 2 kids, I realize I never have it all good, theres always something missing and I feel thats good because else it would be too boring. Enjoy what you have and what you do while you travel to get to your ideal goal.
What is making you feel incomplete? carreer? family?
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