Go Back   English Forum Switzerland > Help & tips > Insurance
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 21.09.2015, 10:29
zmaster1911's Avatar
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Zurich
Posts: 238
Groaned at 10 Times in 8 Posts
Thanked 155 Times in 78 Posts
zmaster1911 has no particular reputation at present
Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Hey guys,
So I'm sure i am not the only one being annoyed by the telemarketers even though I got a brand new number quite recently for work. Instead of blowing up on them every time they call, Ive put together a list of things you could say to them to annoy them or get them to stop calling.
Feel free to add your own.

Sure, I'll switch to your XYZ brand insurance...however my insurance has a clause that states that I have to pay them up in full if I cancel...if you are willing to do so, here let me supply you with their banking details.

Give the phone to the nearest 4 year old and tell them its santa (i am sorely tempted to try this on a bus once)

Speak in a totally foreign language that they have no chance of understanding (Zulu/Xhosa for me Lots of clicking sounds...

Pretend that you are a hostage negotiator, and try to get the telemarketer to release the hostages.

Order food from them (pizza, burgers etc). the more they deny that they are not a pizza place, the more addons on your pizza

Get overly sexual (unfortunately it was a nogo zone for me as most of them were males...hoping for a poor woman to call me soon and decide to change her career after the call)

Open EF Free Stuff page, and try sell the telemarketer something from there

If they ask you how are you, go into a lengthy description of your days activities.

Ask for their full name...then proceed to remember them and listen to them worry that they called an old friend.

Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank zmaster1911 for this useful post:
  #2  
Old 21.09.2015, 10:40
TiMow's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Fribourg
Posts: 9,310
Groaned at 292 Times in 196 Posts
Thanked 12,189 Times in 5,300 Posts
TiMow has a reputation beyond reputeTiMow has a reputation beyond reputeTiMow has a reputation beyond reputeTiMow has a reputation beyond reputeTiMow has a reputation beyond reputeTiMow has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

You're lucky to speak with someone - most calls I get originate from an automated dialer. When the call is answered, there is often no operator available, so I'm greeted with silence .... so much so, that I don't even bother putting the receiver to my ear for unrecognised numbers/out of area codes - I just pick-up, press green, immediately followed by red.
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank TiMow for this useful post:
  #3  
Old 21.09.2015, 10:47
lorena1's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: N/A
Posts: 644
Groaned at 51 Times in 39 Posts
Thanked 563 Times in 313 Posts
lorena1 has a reputation beyond reputelorena1 has a reputation beyond reputelorena1 has a reputation beyond reputelorena1 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

LOL dont let them annoy you. Just hang up. I dont mind them as much..it s a job that pays the bills. One complimented me on my voice and attempted asking me out for coffee
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank lorena1 for this useful post:
  #4  
Old 21.09.2015, 10:51
NutsAndBolts's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Zurich
Posts: 63
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
Thanked 77 Times in 56 Posts
NutsAndBolts has earned some respectNutsAndBolts has earned some respect
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
LOL dont let them annoy you. Just hang up. I dont mind them as much..it s a job that pays the bills. One complimented me on my voice and attempted asking me out for coffee
As usually the calls are recorded, for evidence purposes, he/she must have really liked your voice.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 21.09.2015, 10:56
Castro's Avatar
à la mod
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Basel-Land of Smiles
Posts: 4,773
Groaned at 91 Times in 73 Posts
Thanked 12,711 Times in 4,143 Posts
Castro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

I have a great deal of sympathy for the working man/woman, so I'm pretty boring and polite. I just say that I already have an xyz plan, thank you for calling and I'll keep them in mind for the future.

or

I ask them what colour underwear they're wearing?
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank Castro for this useful post:
  #6  
Old 21.09.2015, 11:08
22 yards's Avatar
Only in moderation
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Basel-Land
Posts: 6,611
Groaned at 188 Times in 147 Posts
Thanked 10,974 Times in 4,533 Posts
22 yards has a reputation beyond repute22 yards has a reputation beyond repute22 yards has a reputation beyond repute22 yards has a reputation beyond repute22 yards has a reputation beyond repute22 yards has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

My two favourite strategies:

1. Ask them if they'll hold for a bit, then lay the receiver on your desk and keep on working (so they can hear that you're still there). Check back after ten minutes.

2. If they call you at home, ask for their home number and tell them you'll call them back. When they refuse, ask them why it's OK for them to call you at home, but not OK the other way around.
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank 22 yards for this useful post:
  #7  
Old 21.09.2015, 11:47
Tom1234's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Kanton Luzern
Posts: 10,064
Groaned at 267 Times in 211 Posts
Thanked 14,178 Times in 5,756 Posts
Tom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

We used to get around two calls every day.

They stopped a couple of months ago. We've been black-listed by the tele-marketeers.


Sometimes being polite doesn't give you the results you need.
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank Tom1234 for this useful post:
  #8  
Old 21.09.2015, 13:29
lorena1's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: N/A
Posts: 644
Groaned at 51 Times in 39 Posts
Thanked 563 Times in 313 Posts
lorena1 has a reputation beyond reputelorena1 has a reputation beyond reputelorena1 has a reputation beyond reputelorena1 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Sure hope you won’t hear back, but seems to me telemarketers don’t give two hoots about what people say or do. They’re usually pretty thick skinned and perseverant. Best to not waste energy or time... they will be back either way


Quote:
View Post
We used to get around two calls every day.

They stopped a couple of months ago. We've been black-listed by the tele-marketeers.


Sometimes being polite doesn't give you the results you need.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 21.09.2015, 16:40
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Geneva area
Posts: 278
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
Thanked 253 Times in 121 Posts
hairybadger has earned the respect of manyhairybadger has earned the respect of manyhairybadger has earned the respect of many
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
We used to get around two calls every day.

They stopped a couple of months ago. We've been black-listed by the tele-marketeers.

Sometimes being polite doesn't give you the results you need.
So what was the magic formula you used to get them to go forth and multiply?
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank hairybadger for this useful post:
  #10  
Old 21.09.2015, 16:53
Tom1234's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Kanton Luzern
Posts: 10,064
Groaned at 267 Times in 211 Posts
Thanked 14,178 Times in 5,756 Posts
Tom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
So what was the magic formula you used to get them to go forth and multiply?
The last time they phoned, she spoke German.

I asked her whether she understood English as my German was very bad.

When she said yes, I said "Well, you'll understand this then, F*** Off!"


A bit crass but these calls were getting to be a real pain.
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank Tom1234 for this useful post:
  #11  
Old 21.09.2015, 17:01
mirfield's Avatar
Moddy McModface
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Basel
Posts: 8,204
Groaned at 51 Times in 45 Posts
Thanked 8,096 Times in 2,954 Posts
mirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
I have a great deal of sympathy for the working man/woman, so I'm pretty boring and polite.
I'm with Castro on this. Otherwise, you may as well stand there shouting at advertising hoardings on the street.

Just say you're not interested (if you're English, you can probably even apologise for that) and hang up.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank mirfield for this useful post:
  #12  
Old 21.09.2015, 17:10
Tom1234's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Kanton Luzern
Posts: 10,064
Groaned at 267 Times in 211 Posts
Thanked 14,178 Times in 5,756 Posts
Tom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
I'm with Castro on this. Otherwise, you may as well stand there shouting at advertising hoardings on the street.

Just say you're not interested (if you're English, you can probably even apologise for that) and hang up.
And how many times should one do that? One? two? a hundred? A thousand?

We signed up for the opt-out 'star' scheme so we really shouldn't be getting these calls anyway and they should know that.

I don't want them to call me - ever.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Tom1234 for this useful post:
  #13  
Old 21.09.2015, 17:20
Castro's Avatar
à la mod
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Basel-Land of Smiles
Posts: 4,773
Groaned at 91 Times in 73 Posts
Thanked 12,711 Times in 4,143 Posts
Castro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond reputeCastro has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Swiss telemarketers are choirboys compared to 'chuggers' (Charity Muggers)

Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Castro for this useful post:
  #14  
Old 21.09.2015, 17:25
mirfield's Avatar
Moddy McModface
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Basel
Posts: 8,204
Groaned at 51 Times in 45 Posts
Thanked 8,096 Times in 2,954 Posts
mirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
And how many times should one do that? One? two? a hundred? A thousand?
I get maybe three or four calls a year.

My free time is too precious to me to waste it ranting at a low paid stranger.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank mirfield for this useful post:
  #15  
Old 21.09.2015, 17:32
Tom1234's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Kanton Luzern
Posts: 10,064
Groaned at 267 Times in 211 Posts
Thanked 14,178 Times in 5,756 Posts
Tom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
I get maybe three or four calls a year.
As I wrote, we were getting one or two a day.

Quote:
View Post

My free time is too precious to me to waste it ranting at a low paid stranger.
That's what I though but stopping what I was doing to answer the phone was a waste of my time too - especially as they used to phone up early evening when I was cooking.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 21.09.2015, 17:36
BokerTov's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: USA, former Zurich
Posts: 1,815
Groaned at 11 Times in 11 Posts
Thanked 3,710 Times in 1,337 Posts
BokerTov has a reputation beyond reputeBokerTov has a reputation beyond reputeBokerTov has a reputation beyond reputeBokerTov has a reputation beyond reputeBokerTov has a reputation beyond reputeBokerTov has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post
Swiss telemarketers are choirboys compared to 'chuggers' (Charity Muggers)
OMG, so true!!! I was recently "charity mugged" by a guy on the street in Philadelphia, he did not even let me talk, but gave me a very aggressive tirade about my individual responsibility in the fight to abolish the death penalty in Pennsylvania. Once he stopped to breathe, I politely let him know that 1) I cannot vote; 2) I don't even live in Pennsylvania; 3) I was there by random chance.

He was so baffled! He told me that I could still get on their web-list or whatever - SURE, I am giving my personal details and my signature to a random dude on the street!!!

I feel bad for the people who get suckered in. Whatever the "cause" - DON'T SIGN stuff off the street!
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank BokerTov for this useful post:
  #17  
Old 21.09.2015, 18:00
Newbie 1st class
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Montreux
Posts: 11
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 5 Times in 3 Posts
missyalexhill has no particular reputation at present
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

I usually say, "do you speak English?"
They say "a little" and start the blah... in English
I interrupt and say "do you speak English? I don't understand you"
Generally they get embarrassed and hang up or you just say it again.
We got loads of calls, but they seem to have stopped...
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank missyalexhill for this useful post:
  #18  
Old 21.09.2015, 18:04
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Neuchatel
Posts: 19,376
Groaned at 368 Times in 275 Posts
Thanked 22,381 Times in 10,070 Posts
Odile has a reputation beyond reputeOdile has a reputation beyond reputeOdile has a reputation beyond reputeOdile has a reputation beyond reputeOdile has a reputation beyond reputeOdile has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Everytime I see this title I can't stop thinking it is a bit early to start talking about skiing

Now I have a really horrible way of getting rid of Telemarketers. Is this Mrs G? Hmm no. Can I speak to her please? Hmm no she is dead. Oh sorry, can I speak to M. G? Hmm no he is dead too. Phone down. I'm sure my dearly departed parents don't mind (we took over their phone number when we moved here).

Last edited by Odile; 21.09.2015 at 18:17.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Odile for this useful post:
  #19  
Old 21.09.2015, 18:20
mirfield's Avatar
Moddy McModface
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Basel
Posts: 8,204
Groaned at 51 Times in 45 Posts
Thanked 8,096 Times in 2,954 Posts
mirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond reputemirfield has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

I doubt that abuse or tricks make any difference. They've heard it all before; finish that call move on to the next.

The company has paid for that number. They're not going to let the feelings of a call-desk (or more likely, call-sweatshop) agent get in the way of that. All you're doing is making one person's day that bit shitter. Meh.

If the calls have stopped, it'll be another reason. They'll be back soon enough.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 21.09.2015, 18:31
Tom1234's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Kanton Luzern
Posts: 10,064
Groaned at 267 Times in 211 Posts
Thanked 14,178 Times in 5,756 Posts
Tom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond reputeTom1234 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Annoying Telemarketers (fun thread)

Quote:
View Post

The company has paid for that number. They're not going to let the feelings of a call-desk (or more likely, call-sweatshop) agent get in the way of that. All you're doing is making one person's day that bit shitter. Meh.
As I wrote - They're breaking the law. We've opted out so they shouldn't be calling us - ever.

It's not really my problem that they've paid for a number that they shouldn't be calling.
Reply With Quote
Reply




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Number list of well known telemarketers zurichzoro Daily life 11 04.02.2015 20:47
One way to deal with Telemarketers Chemmie Jokes/funnies 0 09.05.2011 17:17
(thread split) Thread for sensitive, thin-skinned people to ramble aimlessly higgybaby General off-topic 80 03.11.2009 16:53
How To Handle Telemarketers! Maple Leaf Jokes/funnies 1 06.05.2008 19:06
How to deal with telemarketers AbFab Jokes/funnies 4 30.10.2006 02:23


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 11:48.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0