A polar bear walks into a bar and says "I'd like a Gin ............................. and tonic please".

The barman asks "What's with the big pause?"

To which the bear replies "I don't know, I've always had them".

Q: What do you call a polar bear in the jungle?
A: Lost

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks "Why the long face?"

helps break the ice

What's the first thing mother polar bears teach their offspring?







Don't eat yellow snow

and another one:One day, up in the frozen north a polar bear and his son were out for a stroll. Daddy bear sat on a lump of ice to admire the view and sent his son off to play. Two minutes later Junior came back to dad and says, "Can I ask you a question dad?"

"Sure, son what is it?"
"Am I a real polar bear, Dad?" asks Junior.
Dad smiles and says, "Of course you are, son. Now go and play."
So off Junior goes again throws some snowballs at the seals but soon he's back.
"Hey Dad, are you sure I am a real polar bear? Is there not a wee bit of brown bear or black bear in me?"
Dad smiles again and says, "Look son you've got big hairy black feet, a white coat, and a black shiny nose...of course you're a polar bear....now go back and play."
Once again Junior runs off...slides down the ice....chases a couple of seagulls...after ten minutes of fun he returns with a puzzled look on his face.....
"Daaaad....are you absolutely sure I'm a polar bear?"
"Look son...I'm a polar bear, your mums a polar bear, your granny and grandpa were polar bears...why are you asking all these questions?"
Junior looks up and says...."Cause I'm freezing! "

For students of the Rev. W.A. Spooner ......



A funny bowler pair.

Ahh. A bipolar bear.

Baby Polar bear: "Mummy, Am I really a Polar Bear ?"
Mummy Polar Bear: "Yes dear"

Baby Polar bear: "Mummy, Am I really a Polar Bear ?"
Mummy Polar Bear: "Yes dear"

Baby Polar bear: "Mummy, Are you sure I really am Polar Bear ?"
Mummy Polar Bear: "Yes dear"

Baby Polar bear: "Mummy, Are you really really sure I am a Polar bear ?"
Mummy Polar Bear: "Yes dear, why do you keep asking ?"
Baby Polar bear: "Cuz I am f***king freezing..."

Just got a bad case of Deja vu!

Yes, lol, that will teach me to type first post later...

What, again?