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  #21  
Old 06.09.2009, 16:46
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Re: I love you?

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If it was a male friend I would call him anything stronger than "mate"

Where I come from up North we might show affection by calling women and kids "Luv" or "Pet". But some Southern women might take offence at this

And I might kiss or hug a female friend but I'd never, ever, kiss a "mate"
My heart starts beating every time I get someone calling me "Luv" over the phone I just can't get used to it but I do kinda like it
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  #22  
Old 06.09.2009, 17:09
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Re: I love you?

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I often used to say to my husband 'Ich habe dich Lieb'. He would be dissapointed because he would want me to say 'Ich liebe dich.' A linguistic difference I wasn't awear of. He says he uses 'Ich habe dich Lieb' with his mother and the more romantic 'Ich liebe dich' for me.
In the first half of the 20th century, it was very unusual to use the verb "liäbä" in Swiss German ("lieben" in Standard German). You used terms like "gärn haa" even when madly in love. I'm not quite sure and I cannot verify it, but I think things changed with very popular songs like Artur Beul's "Margritli" (1940), where the refrain goes, "Margritli, i liäb di vo Härzä mit Schmärzä" ("Peggy I love you with all my aching heart"). That song has made it even into today's radio programs, and I suspect it was stuff like that, sort of synthetic Swiss German, that popularized "I liäb(ä) di" instead of "I ha di gäärn." I was born after WWII, but saying "I liäb di" is something I'd never say.

In Standard German and in many dialects in Germany, things are a bit different, especially in that "gern haben" is normally used for things, not persons, although there may be certain exceptions. The Standard German "lieb haben" sounds terribly affected when literally translated into Swiss German, although it may have infiltrated some terrain through German TV and radio too.

So, if you say to your hubby, "Ich habe dich lieb" in Standard German, his objection may be correct, because that's below the level of "Ich liebe dich." However, if you use the correct Swiss German version, "I(ch/g) ha(n) di(ch/g) gä(ä)rn," I might disagree with him in that it's a matter of the right generation. Languages change.
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  #23  
Old 07.09.2009, 08:49
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Re: I love you?

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[...] and ... sorry Ghaladh, I didn't mean to offend you.
Thank you for your comprehension Sada
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Old 07.09.2009, 09:01
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Re: I love you?

That's more a cultural thing than a linguistic one, I see. It's funny to think that expressions of feelings and sentiments have special rules in every country, overall but not only limited to bodily expressions of them (hugs, kisses and else).
This, beyond the linguistic usage of the words, could turn into an interesting thread about that argument, in my opinion. Although this is an English language forum, it gathers people from many different cultures and that's what brought me to subscribe at first instance.
Perhaps, I will start a new thread about that in the proper section.

Leaving the OT behind...
"Ich habe dich lieb" is in German the correct expression of affection for a friend, then?
"Ich liebe dich", from what I understood, is reserved to the partner in love instead. Isn't it?
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  #25  
Old 07.09.2009, 09:03
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Re: I love you?

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If it was a male friend I would call him anything stronger than "mate"

Where I come from up North we might show affection by calling women and kids "Luv" or "Pet". But some Southern women might take offence at this

And I might kiss or hug a female friend but I'd never, ever, kiss a "mate"
When you say 'north' and 'south', do you mean in England, luv?
Am I wrong to think it's not the US of A?
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  #26  
Old 07.09.2009, 09:09
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Re: I love you?

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That's more a cultural thing than a linguistic one, I see. It's funny to think that expressions of feelings and sentiments have special rules in every country, overall but not only limited to bodily expressions of them (hugs, kisses and else).
This, beyond the linguistic usage of the words, could turn into an interesting thread about that argument, in my opinion. Although this is an English language forum, it gathers people from many different cultures and that's what brought me to subscribe at first instance.
Perhaps, I will start a new thread about that in the proper section.

Leaving the OT behind...
"Ich habe dich lieb" is in German the correct expression of affection for a friend, then?
"Ich liebe dich", from what I understood, is reserved to the partner in love instead. Isn't it?


This is an English language forum, and it gathers people from many different... please get this right
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  #27  
Old 07.09.2009, 09:17
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Re: I love you?

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"Ich habe dich lieb" is in German the correct expression of affection for a friend, then?
"Ich liebe dich", from what I understood, is reserved to the partner in love instead. Isn't it?
In Standard German, "Ich hab(e) dich lieb" is just a slightly toned-down version of "Ich liebe dich." Normally you wouldn't say it to a friend, unless you are trying to turn that friendship into a romance. You may say it to your parents, your aunt, your cousin etc., and you may say it to your spouse or lover once in a while, provided you say "I love you" often enough too.

Some people may say "Ich liebe dich" also to their close relatives, but I think most prefer "Ich hab(e) dich lieb."
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  #28  
Old 07.09.2009, 09:33
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Re: I love you?

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This is an English language forum, and it gathers people from many different... please get this right
You are right. I have not been politically correct, but it was unintentional.

Thank you for the clarification, Captain Greybeard.
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  #29  
Old 07.09.2009, 09:42
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Re: I love you?

And to further confusion - if you hear "diä hämmer dänn gärn" (hard to translate, something like "don't we just love those"), it is NOT a term of endearment, but an insult. Imagine you organise something and ask everyone whether it's ok, they all agree, but one, who insists on changing everything. That's when you say "diä hämmer dänn gärn!".

Another variant is when you give someone an unpleasant task or say something playfully insulting to a friend, then that person may reply "ich han dich AU gärn" with an intentionally pained smile. It's a sort of reverse psychology thing, the reasoning being that if you liked the person, you wouldn't do/say what you are doing, so you sarcastically remark that you are fond of them too - not. This is very informal though.

And then there is "Weisch was? Chasch mi gärn ha!", which is basically "You know what? Screw you!".

Ich hab dich lieb is distinctly High German but us Swiss are increasingly letting the lingo of The Large Canton (aka Germany) permeate our Helvetic tongue. Which is a shame, there are some brilliant Swiss German expressions...
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  #30  
Old 07.09.2009, 09:52
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Re: I love you?

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"Margritli, i liäb di vo Härzä mit Schmärzä" ("Peggy I love you with all my aching heart").
Margritli is Swiss German for Peggy? I didn't know that.
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  #31  
Old 07.09.2009, 10:01
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Re: I love you?

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Margritli is Swiss German for Peggy? I didn't know that.
It's easier to find out that Margritli is a little Margrit = Margaret than figuring out that Peggy / Peggie is the same. As for the -li suffix, see Help for 'leiin' word .
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  #32  
Old 07.09.2009, 11:33
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Re: I love you?

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When you say 'north' and 'south', do you mean in England, luv?
Am I wrong to think it's not the US of A?

I was thinking England or else maybe Australia, you are correct in your thinking that this is not a common expression in the US.

The nearest thing to it in the US is "hun" or "hon" (short for "honey") and actually is opposite in that it is more commonly used in the South rather than the North. Folks in more metropolitan areas tend to see it as a bit "country" or unsophisticated.

Sometimes, depending on the gal or who is saying it, it can be taken as overly familiar / cheesy / schmoozy it can be taken (or meant!) offensively, similar to the "sarcastic" uses of "don't you just love that" sort of stuff mentioned above.
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  #33  
Old 07.09.2009, 12:10
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Re: I love you?

One thing I hear quite often lately is "I heart you" which seems to imply love but not lust.

Not sure why it seems new to me. It could be an Americanism, a young and trendy thing or maybe I'm just getting more loveable as I age.
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  #34  
Old 07.09.2009, 12:17
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Re: I love you?

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One thing I hear quite often lately is "I heart you" which seems to imply love but not lust.

Not sure why it seems new to me. It could be an Americanism, a young and trendy thing or maybe I'm just getting more loveable as I age.
I'd've thought it just grew from those loathesome "I (heart symbol) NY" bumper stickers.

Which makes me wonder -- do (US) Americans call them "fender stickers"?
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  #35  
Old 07.09.2009, 12:18
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Re: I love you?

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One thing I hear quite often lately is "I heart you" which seems to imply love but not lust.

Not sure why it seems new to me. It could be an Americanism, a young and trendy thing or maybe I'm just getting more loveable as I age.

It probably comes from instant 'messaging'.

And, yes, you're probably getting mellower and more lovable .
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  #36  
Old 07.09.2009, 12:18
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Re: I love you?

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When you say 'north' and 'south', do you mean in England, luv?
Am I wrong to think it's not the US of A?
England, pet. Yorkshire to be exact. In Lancashire I think they say "chuck".
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Old 07.09.2009, 12:19
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Re: I love you?

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England, pet. Yorkshire to be exact. In Lancashire I think they say "chuck".
Oo aye. And in Scotland it's perfectly acceptable for a man or a woman to call another man or woman "hen".
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  #38  
Old 07.09.2009, 21:54
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Re: I love you?

"pet" is so sweet in English, but be careful it means flatulence in French when the "t" is pronouncedTry it with a French or Swiss gal and you might not get the expected response
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Old 08.09.2009, 20:07
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Re: I love you?

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Which makes me wonder -- do (US) Americans call them "fender stickers"?
I'm trying to put it very carefully, because otherwise sure like heck someone will say, "Hey, here in Onehorsetown, Iowa, we call that an xyz." So I say, in the northeastern Midwest of the US (LP & UP) it's a bumper sticker.
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Old 09.09.2009, 11:35
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Re: I love you?

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I'm trying to put it very carefully, because otherwise sure like heck someone will say, "Hey, here in Onehorsetown, Iowa, we call that an xyz." So I say, in the northeastern Midwest of the US (LP & UP) it's a bumper sticker.

Phooey on you for making me think when my tummy is telling me it is lunch time rather than thinking time...

I have to say that of all the places around the US I've lived as well as being surrounded by Americans who hail from all over themselves (one of the glories of being a military "brat" ) ... I do not recall any of my friends (whatever part of the country they came from) calling it anything other than a "bumper sticker."

I think this is one that you're fairly safe with.
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