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  #101  
Old 05.12.2010, 04:42
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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The overwhelming majority of what's on the telly is appalling. Especially the supposedly "intelligent" stuff. I would sooner gnaw off my own foot than watch a television documentary.

There's a great documentary series from science/historian James Burke called the "The Day The Universe Changed." You should check it out if you like television documentaries.
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  #102  
Old 05.12.2010, 11:54
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Making small talk about television, or making 100+ posts about talking about television? Seems a bit redundant. I think it's time to fix your TV. or buy an Xbox.

Posted on the internet at four o' clock in the morning.

Who's the sad **** here?

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You should check it out if you like television documentaries.
I don't like television documentaries, as they're all aimed at four year olds.
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  #103  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:23
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Re: People who talk about the telly

Its a bit dismissive to criticise an entire media....its like saying "I don't like anything thats written"....

Saying "I don't like TV documentaries" means what? That you don't like getting information on factual matters presented in a manner which is both audio and visual??

And saying that all TV documentaries are aimed at 4 year olds is ....well.....just not true, is it?

Instead of your borderline trollage , what kind of stuff have you ever enjoyed watching? I can't believe that there has never been a TV programme that has appealed to you
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  #104  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:26
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Re: People who talk about the telly

the show "Lost" was not real, it did not happen? Could it happen? I`m cushed, well i better go read a book then. Maybe a Fiction
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  #105  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:31
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Its a bit dismissive to criticise an entire media....its like saying "I don't like anything thats written"....
Cobblers. It's more like saying "I don't like Westerns" or "I don't like Chick Lit".

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Saying "I don't like TV documentaries" means what? That you don't like getting information on factual matters presented in a manner which is both audio and visual??
Correct. The compression of a subject in order to make it suitable for an hour long television documentary serves to render it almost meaningless. It's either that, or the other extreme (seen in science documentaries) of expanding one point to fill an hour, with inane questions like "but what would happen if someone threw a match into the petrol tank...?" every five minutes, presumably to keep the four year olds interested in what's coming next.

I'd much rather read it on the internet, where I can get the information I want quickly and efficiently, or in a book, where I can learn about the subject in some kind of depth.

And don't get me started on the subject of tramping Romans' feet...

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And saying that all TV documentaries are aimed at 4 year olds is ....well.....just not true, is it?
No. Some documentaries are aimed at adults with the minds of 4 year olds, too.

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Instead of your borderline trollage , what kind of stuff have you ever enjoyed watching? I can't believe that there has never been a TV programme that has appealed to you
Did I ever say that? I like the telly. I just don't like people boring me senseless about programmes I've never seen, and in which I am not remotely interested.

Please do keep up, old chap.
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  #106  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:35
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Did I ever say that? I like the telly. I just don't like people boring me senseless about programmes I've never seen, and in which I am not remotely interested.
I know! But I want to hear what you like.....
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  #107  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:36
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Re: People who talk about the telly

Now children, Mr L. would like some lunch. Can I trust you to behave yourselves while I go off into the kitchen, or must I send one of you to your room first?
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  #108  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:40
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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I know! But I want to hear what you like.....
Why does it matter to you?
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  #109  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:42
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Now children, Mr L. would like some lunch. Can I trust you to behave yourselves while I go off into the kitchen, or must I send one of you to your room first?
Goodness.....you think this is a spat??

Just asking the great man what he watches on the TV, thats all!

I know his answer is a bit prickly, but he doesn't allow himself to vent at Wagner or Katie on a Saturday night, so we are his collective scratching post.....its an honour!
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  #110  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:44
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Why does it matter to you?
Doesn't matter at all

Was just making conversation
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  #111  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:44
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Just asking the great man what he watches on the TV, thats all!
I don't watch the telly. Didn't you get that bit?

And less of the "great man", please. This is an internet forum, not an eighteenth century salon.
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  #112  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:45
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Goodness.....you think this is a spat??
No, but I'm still in grandchildren mode from yesterday.

Re documentaries - they often have the Reader's Digest Syndrome. Just as you think they are getting their teeth into something, they stop.
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  #113  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:47
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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I like the telly.
"I don't watch the telly. Didn't you get that bit? "

Oh god.....I'm going to another thread.....

*head explodes in confusion*
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  #114  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:48
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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Re documentaries - they often have the Reader's Digest Syndrome. Just as you think they are getting their teeth into something, they stop.
You've hit the nail right on the head!

I can't remember ever having watched a television documentary that didn't have me throwing things at the telly in fury at how inane and shallow the whole business was.

It's even worse if you actually know something about the subject they're covering. You find yourself wondering if the researchers ever bothered to leave their Facebook and espresso machines long enough to look anything up.
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  #115  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:51
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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"I don't watch the telly. Didn't you get that bit? "

Oh god.....I'm going to another thread.....

*head explodes in confusion*
I like sitting by the Aegean Sea with a glass of ouzo and a plate of fish.

I don't sit by the Aegean Sea with a glass of ouzo and a plate of fish, because it's a long way away and I have no money and I have to go to work.

In the same way, I like watching the telly, but, as it happens, I don't actually watch the telly.

Bloody hell, Caviarchips. I'm beginnning to wonder if watching all that telly has turned your brain to jelly...
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  #116  
Old 05.12.2010, 12:53
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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I like sitting by the Aegean Sea with a glass of ouzo and a plate of fish.

I don't sit by the Aegean Sea with a glass of ouzo and a plate of fish, because it's a long way away and I have no money and I have to go to work.

Bloody hell, Caviarchips. I'm beginnning to wonder if watching all that telly has turned your brain to jelly...
Oh, that's why you don't watch the telly?! Well, I never knew that...

(scribbles furtively on Christmas list)
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  #117  
Old 05.12.2010, 14:14
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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I like sitting by the Aegean Sea with a glass of ouzo and a plate of fish.

I don't.

I'm fed up with going abroad and being treated like a sheep.


I mean, what's the point of being carted around in buses surrounded by sweaty mindless oafs from Kettering and Boventry in their cloth caps and their cardigans and their transistor radios and their 'Sunday Mirrors', complaining about the tea, 'Oh they don't make it properly here do they not like at home' stopping at Kephalonian tavernas, selling fish and chips and Watney's Red Barrel and calamares and two veg and sitting in cotton sun frocks squirting Timothy White's suncream all over their puffy raw swollen purulent flesh cos they 'overdid it on the first day'! And being herded into endless Hotel Miramars and Bellvueses and Bontinentals with their international luxury modern roomettes and their Watney's Red Barrel and their swimming pools full of fat German businessmen pretending they're acrobats and forming pyramids and frightening the children and barging in to the queues and if you're not at your table spot on seven you miss your bowl of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup, the first item on the menu of International Cuisine, and every Thursday night there's a bloody cabaret in the bar featuring some tiny emaciated dago with nine-inch hips and some big fat bloated tart with her hair brylcreemed down and a big arse presenting Syrtos for Foreigners. And then some adenoidal typists from Birmingham with diarrhoea and flabby white legs and hairy bandy-legged wop waiters called Nicos, and then, once a week there's an excursion to the local Delphian ruins where you can buy cherryade and melted ice cream and bleedin' Watney's Red Barrel, and one night they take you to a local restaurant with local colour and colouring and they show you there and you sit next to a party of people from Rhyl who keeps singing 'Never on Sunday' and complaining about the food - 'Oh! It's so greasy isn't it?' and then you get cornered by some drunken greengrocer from Luton with an Instamatic and Dr Scholl sandals and last Tuesday's 'Daily Express' and he drones on and on and on about how Mr. Smith should be running this country and how many languages Enoch Powell can speak and then he throws up all over the Cuba Libres. And sending tinted postcards of places they don't know they haven't even visited, 'to all at number 22, weather wonderful, our room is marked with an "X". Wish you were here.', 'Food very greasy but we have managed to find this marvellous little place hidden away in the back streets, where you can even get Watney's Red Barrel and cheese and onion crisps and the accordionist plays "Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner"' and spending four days on the tarmac at Luton airport on a five-day package tour with nothing to eat but dried Watney's sandwhiches and there's nowhere to sleep and the kids are vomitting and throwing up on the plastic flowers and they keep telling you it'll only be another hour although your plane is still in Iceland waiting to take some Swedes to Yugoslavia before it can pick you up on the tarmac at 3 a.m. in the bloody morning and you sit on the tarmac till six because of 'unforeseen difficulties'. i.e. the permanent strike of Air Traffic Control in Paris, and nobody can go to the lavatory until you take off at eight, and when you get to Athens airport everybody's swallowing Enterovioform tablets and queuing for the toilets and when you finally get to the hotel, there's no water in the taps, there's no water in the pool, there's no water in the bog and there's a bleeding lizard in the bidet, and half the rooms are double-booked and you can't sleep anyway because of the permanent twenty-four-hour drilling of the foundations of the hotel next door - and you're plagues by appalling apprentice chemists from Ealing pretending to be hippies, and middle-class stockbrokers' wives busily buying identical holiday villas in suburban development plots just like Esher, in case the Labour government gets in again, and fat American matrons with sloppy-buttocks and Hawaiian-patterned ski pants looking for any mulatto male who can keep it up long enough when they finally let it all flop out. And the Greek Tourist Board promises you that the raging cholera epidemic is merely a case of mild Hellenic tummy, like the previous outbreak of Hellenic tummy in 1660 which killed half London and decimated Europe - and meanwhile the bloody Army are busy arresting sixteen-year-olds for kissing in the streets and shooting anyone under nineteen who doesn't like the Generals. And then on the last day in the airport lounge everyone's comparing sunburns, drinking Retsina, buying cartons of duty free "cigarillos" and using up their last pesetas on horrid dolls in Greek National costume and awful straw donkeys and posters with your name on "El Greco and Brian Pules of Norwich" and 3-D pictures of the Pope and Kennedy, and everybody's talking about coming again next year and you swear you never will although there you are tumbling bleary-eyed out of a tourist-tight antique Olympic Airways airplane.

BTW, where's Wagbo?
.
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  #118  
Old 05.12.2010, 14:16
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Re: People who talk about the telly

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I don't like television documentaries, as they're all aimed at four year olds.
I agree but as usual I found an exception. BBC Horizon docs were generally thoughtful and focused on the more mature crowd.
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  #119  
Old 05.12.2010, 14:23
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Re: People who talk about the telly

Weejeem - I really needed a good laugh- thanks. Caught a cold on train coming back from Venice. Going abroad is like banging your head against the wall - it feels so good when you stop. And Venice really makes you realise how CHEAP Switzerland is and how varied the food! (paid E17 for 2 cups of black coffee).
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  #120  
Old 05.12.2010, 14:27
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Re: People who talk about the telly

I've been outranted!

Magnificent!
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