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Old 24.03.2011, 09:37
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Re: Getting pregnant

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If I want to win the lottery, I've got to do step 1 - buy a ticket. If my wife and I want to make a baby, we've got to do step 1 - regular, frequent unprotected sex. With each other.

If Carlos's friends really aren't doing step 1, then he is right - they're wasting their time getting infertility treatment. But it is hard for people to accept that perhaps, just possibly, the fault lies with them. With their lifestyle. So, I can understand that. But it doesn't evoke much sympathy.

I don't agree with that, because there are successful parents, who lived with lack of success for many years. My sister and her hubby went through the whole gamut - though balked at IVF. They accepted that becoming parents was unlikely. Three years later, my nephew came along. They'd be well qualified to give both points of view, because they've been there.
well then you misunderstood as what i was perhaps too subtley saying was that for those that have experienced or are experiencing ivf or icsi, its an extremely sensitive time and they cannot respond with the same objectivity that other more fortunate couples can. Finally, its a good job that the medical profession doesnt adopt such a stilted approach to any couple that consults them because any professional that responded by simply saying well derr what do you expect now stop wasting my time, would do more damage than he could possibly imagine. but fortunately that is not the case. one last point, that some may not be aware of, ivf/icsi or whatever you try tends to cause the woman to baloon up in the midrift because of the huge amount of homronal drug treatment she has to endure.
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Old 24.03.2011, 11:26
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Re: Getting pregnant

People are definitely overreacting, and Carlos was smart to put a disclaimer at the beginning, but let's face it, this thread could have only gone one way.

You don't make a thread like this and expect for everyone to reply, "Well, kind sir, in the specific case of the clueless couple you mentioned, I absolutely agree!" This is a very emotional topic and there's just too much baggage for most people. Most will undoubtedly feel that it's somehow aimed at them and criticize you for insensitivity and give counter-examples from their own experience. While some will perhaps even recognize themselves and their own past mistakes in what he listed and react even more violently (not saying that's the case for anyone in this thread, mind you). And you shouldn't expect anyone who's guilty of what Carlos listed to actually own up to it in this thread. They probably can't even admit it to themselves.

So I hope Carlos feels better after venting, but he should also realize that, by design, this thread wasn't going to reach its target audience and only piss people off.
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