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  #81  
Old 18.06.2012, 03:16
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

All I know to be a lifecoach here you really only need a passion to help others and some monetary back up. I too am rather suspicious of their qualifications and feel it has become just some trend to do this type of job. As far as knowing how you came across to this person you just met I have no idea really to judge. But what I will say about the power of attraction is: It is how you make others feel about themselves. We all have big ego's and they can be brushed positively or negatively and alas you have brushed this person the wrong way which in turn upset her partner.
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Old 18.06.2012, 08:45
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

It's just occured to me that perhaps all EF folk could add "life Coach" to our CV's, given the number of times we offer advice and opinions on each others' lives.
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  #83  
Old 18.06.2012, 09:31
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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these are particularly difficult to discuss at dinner parties.
But I would expect a Eheberater -- Sozialhelfer -- Psychiater -- Strassen-Berater to be able to cope with awkward questions very easily. That she found it difficult shows that she was/is not really up to the job. Yes, C&A and H&M look for fairly educated sales-women
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  #84  
Old 18.06.2012, 14:48
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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I was at a dinner recently where a guy known to the group brought his new girlfriend and introduced her profession as a Life Coach. She looked to be in her late 20's, maybe early 30's so it got my curiosity up to know what qualified her to be a Life Coach to others'. I was thinking certainly she must have already accomplished some amazing things to be qualified to coach others and get paid for her services at a relatively young age.

I've often wondered this about people who I see in ads or articles about them being a Life Coach but I've never spoken to one. So I asked her to tell some of the things she's done or accomplished that led her to become a professional Life Coach. She proceeded to give a bunch of vague answers about being a good person and having found herself and thought she could help others. She doesn't have a degree in Psychology or a related field, has never worked even as a counselor for say alcoholics or in shelters and doesn't have any type of a degree at all. When I asked for more details about what happened to lead her to that conclusion the conversation died out and they walked away to another group.

Later I was told the guy complained what a jerk I was and that I was very rude to have embarrassed his girlfriend in front of others. 2 others who were there at the time this happened told me I didn't come across as sarcastic or talking down to her and they thought it was strange the answers she gave.

Does anyone know a Life Coach and do they consider it rude to ask them such questions?

Stuck next to a life coach at a dinner party? Sounds more like Dante's Hell to me


(...I couldn't resist)
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  #85  
Old 18.06.2012, 15:23
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

What I read from this thread is, a life coach does not:

- have to sit at a desk like me
- have to populate bespoke software or spreadsheets with data like me
- have a piece of paper to say they are skilled at their job like me
- have a degree to show that they were part of the "uni club" like me, and therefore are imbeciles
- do something I understand and thus can not do anything as valuable as me

Sure, I can imagine there are people out there who claim to be something they are not. Sure, there are great administrative assistants and terrible ones. Great financial advisors and scammers.

But just because you do not understand something, can not get you head around something or can an not envisage what is required to do something or enrich other peoples lives. It does not mean that it does not exist, or is superficial.

I would not necessarily say your questions were rude, however, it sounds like they were uneducated. You made an assumption that is nothing to do with what being a life coach is, and then proceeded to put this person on the spot to satisfy an answer they would not have given as it was nothing to do with what they do. On the basis that this was a first meet, and you did not know this person, then it was perhaps a little rude to be somewhat patronizing and belittling in your questions.
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  #86  
Old 18.06.2012, 15:29
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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A good life coach would have deflected your question and turned it around so you spilled all your dirty secrets and insecurities in front of the crowd. Then offered you practical solutions for your problems.
Otherwise she was inept, and you exposed her. I guess she was embarrassed.
Alternatively, she was a decent woman who thought, I could really expose this ill educated person about what a life coach is and put them on the spot, but I have just met this guy I am dating and I do not want to cause a scence or embarrass him, but I cant believe this jerk thinks you need to achieve great things in life to be a life coach. I shall entertain him and pretend I am shy and eat my food and hopefully he will start asking the chef how he can be a cook if he hasnt tried every food in the world to know whats good to cook.
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  #87  
Old 18.06.2012, 15:51
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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I my book, you did nothing wrong...but I'm suspecting, that we both "suffer" from having similar ways of talking to people...and at times, said people, especially those with massive sticks up their rear end take it the wrong way and get offended.

On the topic of life coaches, I find that this recently emerged to be one of those trendy professions (along with zumba instructors, distance learning educators, dog walkers etc.)...where people can easily obtain certifications and basically just feed of the hype that modern media and Hollywood are constantly bombarding us with....but thankfully, not everybody falls for the Rayban and Uggs boots wearing, Ipod and Decaf-doubleshot espresso-fruity-mocha-frappucino carrying expectations that some overly flamboyant metro/homosexual is currently having in store for the gullible.
What's so bad about being a distance learning educator? I've done a fair bit of online training myself. Try teaching hospital drug administration if you don't know what you're talking about. Come to think about it alot of kids in the Australian outback are taught over the internet/radio etc.
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  #88  
Old 18.06.2012, 15:53
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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Come to think about it alot of kids in the Australian outback are taught over the internet/radio etc.
Which explains a lot....
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  #89  
Old 18.06.2012, 16:17
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

how about dissing a life coach and his twitter ramble... here's a pro at it...

http://twitter.com/JoshMalina/status/179362270340591618

i-rude-ask-life-coach-why-they-were-qualified-job-life_coach_tweet.jpg
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  #90  
Old 18.06.2012, 16:49
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

Sounds like she just needs a good life coach. Next time, ask her if she knows one.
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Old 19.06.2012, 09:07
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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Well there you it shows she was not strong enough to make her own decision,
So because she used to young, and because she made bad decisions in the past, she cant be relied on to advise people now?

You don't think there may be a remote chance that she learned something from her personal experiences, and could be in a position to help others deal with their own issues
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Old 19.06.2012, 10:21
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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So because she used to young, and because she made bad decisions in the past, she cant be relied on to advise people now?

You don't think there may be a remote chance that she learned something from her personal experiences, and could be in a position to help others deal with their own issues
Living in Switzerland (wealthy country, no natural disasters, no war, no major events happening etc) I doubt that the lady in question would have experienced much yet at such an early age. Of course I don't know her personal circumstances, but I think she is a little young to go around handing out advice.

I know at 25 any advice that I gave out would probably not be very helpful, I just hadn't lived enough.
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  #93  
Old 19.06.2012, 10:34
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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Living in Switzerland (wealthy country, no natural disasters, no war, no major events happening etc) I doubt that the lady in question would have experienced much yet at such an early age. Of course I don't know her personal circumstances, but I think she is a little young to go around handing out advice.

I know at 25 any advice that I gave out would probably not be very helpful, I just hadn't lived enough.

Hahaha I think this is the funniest of replieis thus far!!
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  #94  
Old 19.06.2012, 10:57
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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I know at 25 any advice that I gave out would probably not be very helpful, I just hadn't lived enough.
Looking at my 27-year-old stepdaughter, SHE needs a life coach! But she sure as h**l isn't qualified to give anyone who has passed Kindergarten age any advice!

I work as a senior-level information systems consultant - I have more than 25 years of professional IT experience and have been consulting for almost half of that time. I feel quite confident that I could advise someone how to properly plan and execute projects ... but even after 25 years in the industry, I wouldn't ever claim to be an executive coach or "life coach" anything like that. I have learned how to work with different kinds of people - many of whom I wouldn't necessarily associate with on a personal level. I have had to learn this through experience - when I was younger, I wouldn't have understood or paid attention to some "life coach" trying to give me advice. And now that I'm older, I don't need someone with less life experience than me trying to give me theoretical advice - I have learned what works and what doesn't FOR ME IN MY CASE. Asking someone else to pay me for this would be fraud - I couldn't guarantee that my experience is of any use to anyone else.
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  #95  
Old 19.06.2012, 12:23
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

well, i am a bit with wolli. i think it is not the question you were asking that put her off but the way it came across. especially if she is not a native english speaker there is a difference between "what qualifies you" and " i am just curious, but what school/education one need to accomplish in switzerland to become a life coach?" and if it sounds cheeky or really interested is another story. swiss people tend to translate the question word by word and qualifies you= was qualifiziert dich, if one understands it that way, it has a offensive note in german language/understanding.

asking "how does one become a life coach?" might have done the trick.
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Old 19.06.2012, 18:16
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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Hahaha I think this is the funniest of replieis thus far!!
I would just rather be advised by somebody who has been through some sh!t and come out the other side than somebody whos biggest decision was which colour shoes to wear to the office today.
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Old 19.06.2012, 18:43
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

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I would just rather be advised by somebody who has been through some sh!t and come out the other side than somebody whos biggest decision was which colour shoes to wear to the office today.
Fair enough, each to their own and all that.

It was just amusing to me as it was probably the best example of someone not understanding exactly what a life coach is/does, and thus your rationale for selecting one based on your criteria was brilliantly outrageous.
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  #98  
Old 19.06.2012, 18:57
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

"What qualifies you to..." is quite offensive in English too. It implies that the person shouldn't be doing that job. The polite thing would have been to say " How interesting and what sort of qualifications does one need to become a life coach?" or something of that nature.
Incidentally just because someone is young shouldn't disqualify them from giving good advice. At my age (old) I might well want an older life coach, but I would be prepared to bet that most younger people would prefer to take advice from someone nearer their own age.
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Old 19.06.2012, 19:12
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

So in conclusion; yes it was rude, but rightfully so?
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Old 19.06.2012, 21:20
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Re: Was I rude to ask a Life Coach why they were qualified for the job? ?

Well here I go stepping into the fire. I am a coach and have been for 14 years and no, the length of times does not make me a good coach.

There have been people who are sometimes somewhat sarcastic and might ask this type of question. I accept this and I suppose if I can not then I should not be a coach. Hopefully I have got it a little bit together not to respond.

Actually I tell my clients to ask me questions and to tell me when they do not like what I say or do. I am not perfect.

As a coach, I do not fix people. I do not know anyone who does not have some sort of a problem or issue in their lives. I am a coach and trainer. I help people or guide people.I encourage and support them. I do not give them answers but help them to find their own answers. As a trainer I teach them logical practical skills on how to survive.
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