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  #41  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:26
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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Oh merde, Du Scheiße, now I have a date with a methodist girl... I need strong booze.
I appreciate you think I am a girl although I am 37 years old.

But seriously. "No, there is nothing wrong with people looking at each other, but there is something wrong with objectifying other people and believing their purpose is to be attractive, for you. Young women are going to work, going to meet friends, going to classes, you know, doing things that people do, people who have pursuits and interests and are not just ornaments to be stared at."
"The fact that men believe women exist for their viewing pleasure IS A PROBLEM. It doesn’t matter how much men like it. I should be able to leave my house without feeling watched…"

from stopstreetharassment.org
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  #42  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:28
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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I cannot leave it or forget about it. I feel I need to talk to the owner of this bar.
You come from an area which is a little rustic, and you live in an area which is a little MORE rustic. Its a shame you feel that the behavious of middle aged men in Valais is a touch old fashioned and inapproproate.

I suggest you move, I'm afraid. You are going against centuries of isolation and a conversation with the bar owner won't help one jot.

From your description however, it doesn't seem that major, so maybe you should try to just let it pass, or take your junior BF along next time to support
  #43  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:30
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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It's fine to brand him sexist but whats with the tattoo comment, what has body art got to do with anything. The women might have been their friends or sisters who knows....
I didin't comment his tatoos in the bar.
  #44  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:31
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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I live in a small village near Sion. There is a newly open bar& restaurant in my neighbourhood which I had considered as a decent place.I don’t drink alcohol, sometimes when the restaurants are open, I go for a meal or a cup of coffee.

Yesterday evening it was first time when I went to that bar, quite cosy and clean inside, like the pubs in Connemara in Ireland. I brought my laptop and a nice girl who works in the restaurant helped me with theWiFi. I preferred to stay inside, as there were lots of flies outside bar. The evening seemed to go well, there were some families with children while the other guests were sitting on the terrace. the music was ok, from the 80’s. But the families left and I stayed alone for a while inside the bar. After a cup of Ovomaltine I ordered a coffee and continued working on my laptop. Then, around 22.00pm the group of four Swiss people came in. Two men and a woman aged 55-65 and a woman in her 40‘s, slightly overweighted. They took places at the nearest table, I answered their „bonsoir“ and, being completely absorbed by the things on my laptop, I didin’t spot when these women dissapeared. I heard one of these men talking to me but the music was loud and I didin’t understand him. I approached their table and the man wanted to shake my hand to „know the young girl‘s name“. I said I wasn’t young and refused to shake his hand. He stared at me from head to toe and said something to his mate. I said I had a boyfriend 12 years my junior, the older man groaned. I returned to my table, I saw their female mates returning and these men behave as if nothing happened. I wanted to approach them and to tell to these women how I was treated but the owner of he bar sat next tot hem and started a conversation. I waited until the two couples left the bar and then I went back home.

I wasn’t dressed inappropriately, I am rather unfeminine, I always wear trousers, never skirts nor dresses, and I wear shirts with long sleeves. If this bar looked rough, I would never go inside. When I lived in both Ireland and the UK, I often went tot he pubs on my own but I was treated with respect. I never start a conversation with strangers. Today I was very angry. I cannot leave it or forget about it. I feel I need to talk to the owner of this bar.
The Merriam-Webster dictionary should quote your words for the definition of Drama Queen.
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  #45  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:31
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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I should be able to leave my house without feeling watched…"
You say it yourself, your words: The problem is FEELING watched, not being watched. The problem is inside you, because you won't be able to make the world blind. However, you sure managed to disgust to guys in the bar and a couple more in this thread. You didn't want to be an object of desire, enjoy being an object of despise.
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  #46  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:31
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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But you know that Switzerland is not a middle-west state, right?
HEY! We Midwesterners know how to check out a piece of tail far better than this lady got it; don't insult us along with her!

She's obviously got Utah leanings anyway.....
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  #47  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:33
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

No but on here you are making a comment that he was a tattoed villain, your words, so in the same way you want to be judged as an equal you are happy to make comments about body art, and also weight? Interesting line in hypocrisy
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  #48  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:35
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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Interesting line in hypocrisy
We must give her credit for that: She was honest about it, she did say she is a methodist...



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HEY! We Midwesterners know how to check out a piece of tail far better than this lady got it; don't insult us along with her!

She's obviously got Utah leanings anyway.....
I hereby openly offer my most humble apologies, I wrongly thought Utah qualified as middle-west. m(_ _)m <=Japanese smiley for humble self humiliation.
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  #49  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:37
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

True story:While I was on holiday once I dude roughly 3 times my size if I wanted to get it on....I'm a dude by the way. I then escaped and bring up the long version of the story at parties for a laugh. Life is way too short to be getting worked up by stuff like that. And anyway they didn't make a sexist comment. I'm assuming you are younger than them which makes you young in their eyes. If not they were making you a compliment. Worst case was they were flirting with you which tends to happen once in a while in secular society. Best case was they were being friendly and just wanted to introduce themselves to a new inhabitant. And anyway seeing as he looked at you from up to down after you had a fit for them asking your name I'm guess the look was less 'oooh your hot' and more in a 'WTF who do you think you are?' way. But as I said even if they were flirting so what they said nothing sexist nor derogatory
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  #50  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:38
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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Its a shame you feel that the behavious of middle aged men in Valais is a touch old fashioned and inapproproate.

I suggest you move, I'm afraid. You are going against centuries of isolation and a conversation with the bar owner won't help one jot.

From your description however, it doesn't seem that major, so maybe you should try to just let it pass, or take your junior BF along next time to support
It is a shame for you to make comments like that.

I come across many valaisan women suffering in silence because of husbands, bully-bosses, street-bullies, etc.
The owner of that bar is risking losing the clients. I can be proactive and fight.

And stay away from commenting my BF.
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  #51  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:41
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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I'm assuming you are younger than them which makes you young in their eyes.
Funny point btw: I assume they said jeune fille, which is in this context the exact translation of Miss (as opposed to married Mrs) on which she insisted heavily on when I called her Mrs Calvin. Irony, irony...
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Old 01.07.2012, 00:42
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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It's fine to brand him sexist but whats with the tattoo comment, what has body art got to do with anything. The women might have been their friends or sisters who knows....
So the tattoll comment was also an obvios objectification base on pysical appearance. One has the right do that, I will not complain or judge, but I feel if I expressed such hypocracy or ignorance, I would be going straight to hell
  #53  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:43
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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We must give her credit for that: She was honest about it, she did say she is a methodist...



. [/I]
But in an other thread, she said she wasn't religious...
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  #54  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:45
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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But in an other thread, she said she wasn't religious...
My guess is, being methodist doesn't mean being religious to her, it just means being right.
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Old 01.07.2012, 00:47
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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You say it yourself, your words: The problem is FEELING watched, not being watched. The problem is inside you, because you won't be able to make the world blind. However, you sure managed to disgust to guys in the bar and a couple more in this thread. You didn't want to be an object of desire, enjoy being an object of despise.
This is a quote from a website, if you read it correctly, but that concerns the same problem: a harassment.

How do you think I managed to disgust the guys in the bar? The fact is that they have humiliated me, I wasn't rude with them.

And how I disgusted you and the other guys on this forum and why are you speaking on their behalf?
  #56  
Old 01.07.2012, 00:49
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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And how I disgusted you and the other guys on this forum and why are you speaking on their behalf?
Just a wild guess...
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Old 01.07.2012, 00:50
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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But in an other thread, she said she wasn't religious...
Religion and faith in God are two different things. Religion was invented by people, it is a human tradition. I prefer to focus on faith in God.

Methodism is not a religion, protestantism is not a religion either.
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Old 01.07.2012, 00:50
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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This is a quote from a website, if you read it correctly, but that concerns the same problem: a harassment.

How do you think I managed to disgust the guys in the bar? The fact is that they have humiliated me, I wasn't rude with them.

And how I disgusted you and the other guys on this forum and why are you speaking on their behalf?
I am sorry but the thing is, I have a great deal experience of harassment and well, I wasn't there but following your story, I can't find how they were harassing you.

Maybe you forgot to add some details? Because If it is what you said, it is like saying a girl failed pregnant swimming in a pool.
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Old 01.07.2012, 00:52
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Methodism is not a religion, protestantism is not a religion either.
Just log yourself in wikipedia, you have work to do.
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Old 01.07.2012, 00:52
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Re: Unwanted sexist comments from men in public

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Just a guess...
In the past I had a director in a company who said often: "Don't guess, give the facts, the evidence".
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