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  #41  
Old 07.08.2012, 13:51
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

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It's infuriating, but then again the English generally don't appreciate intellectualism in conversation.
You must have been moderating a forum to have such an in-depth insight of the matter. (This post is totally irony-free).
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  #42  
Old 07.08.2012, 14:30
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

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English people tend to interupt each other all the time. On a recent trip to England explaining something which ought to have taken a minute, I was interrupted numerous times; in frustration, I politely asked if they'd just listen then they'd understand. One woman snapped "How German!". I was doing them a favour and end up getting chastised.

It's infuriating, but then again the English generally don't appreciate intellectualism in conversation. It seems to make them uncomfortable, yet they aren't *generally* stupid people. (Although their Celtic cousins simply call them 'Boring'...)

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  #43  
Old 07.08.2012, 15:26
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

OMG this is totally my issue as well. Now I have become more conscious of it, so I try to stop myself but often times I have started to talk even before I have realized I am doing it!

Frankly there is no excuse for it, I have to get better. Currently, I squeeze my fingers below the edge of the table to stop me from interrupting.

With old friends its ok, they just pass a rude comment and are done with it, but it makes shy people nervous. Nobody has ever complained, but I've noticed
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  #44  
Old 07.08.2012, 16:02
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

I don't interrupt people and I don't surround myself with people that ... Excuse me? Yes.

Anyway, I wouldn't like my people to constantly ... yes, I can see that, thank you.
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  #45  
Old 08.08.2012, 00:25
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

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You've got it right in one lost_inbroad. I think it's more that men tend to ignore women here when talking to couples.
I definitely feel like this happens... and the speaker is looking at my DH the whole time (maybe because he is fluent and I am not...) but then they can't even see the non-verbal cues that I have a question or would like to say something. Husband said I should write down or mentally note what I would like to say later, but sometimes it's not relevant later or we just wasted time speaking about XYZ for 20 minutes when I could have told them something otherwise. At one meeting... the man meeting with us simply wrote down "Herr Diamondscan" and not Familie or Frau or anything. It's like I'm not there.

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You don't recognize the "right" moments to interrupt as a non-native speaker because you're probably dragging a little behind in the conversation. Your other half should realize that and not be so harsh on you.
Exactly... I told him I was too stupid to recognize the end of a sentence in German... otherwise I would at least interrupt in between sentences instead of mid-sentence. But then he said I do it in English too.... but has yet to give me an example of when or how I do it in any language. He has said he should start recording me...

I do find it interesting that DH thinks it's absolutely not polite to interrupt because he learnt it in school. I always thought that is is helpful sometimes when done politely or for a reason. I don't necessarily find it a plausible reason not to interrupt simply because one does not do that and one should learn that in school. But I do care about being socially integrated here, so of course it bothers me if I'm coming off as really rude.

Thank heavens I at least married a man who will let me talk and finishes his sentences for him sometimes.
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  #46  
Old 09.08.2012, 14:55
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

Still laughing at the full duplex conversation (know exactly what you mean), but like others here, I have to hold back on the so-called interrupting too. Mainly because;

1. I would like to quickly add to what you just said..
2. I fully understand what you are saying (2 minutes ago)
3. oh sry, thought you were going to let someone else get a word in.

But don't hold back too long, the conversation might loose it's appeal after the first 5 mins.

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....but then they can't even see the non-verbal cues that I have a question or would like to say something. Husband said I should write down or mentally note what I would like to say later, but sometimes it's not relevant later or we just wasted time speaking about XYZ for 20 minutes when I could have told them something otherwise.
That is probably the best reason why we 'interrupt'

Last edited by aob; 09.08.2012 at 15:31.
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  #47  
Old 09.08.2012, 15:04
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

another tactic is to take out your iphone and start checking facebook while he talks at you :P
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  #48  
Old 09.08.2012, 15:13
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Re: Do you interrupt people?

I am biased on this. The genes from my German grandmother hate to be interrupted but the genes from my Italian grandmother interrupt all the time. In the middle sit the genes of my Swiss grandfathers and try to neutralize the German and the Italian side.
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