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-   -   The ultimate Swiss neighbor (https://www.englishforum.ch/complaints-corner/238050-ultimate-swiss-neighbor.html)

dachshund 01.08.2015 12:33

The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
I just need to let out! If I keep it for myself I might end up burning this building down to ashes!

So, happy birthday Switzerland! 1. August is your day and people should celebrate, not my downstairs neighbor though. She tends to be weird but normally would keep her weirdo crap for herself and not bother anyone, until today.

At 06:45 as any other day my puppy started jumping and crying to go out. As any other day, I woke up, got dressed and went out with her looking like a heroin addict. 15 minutes later we are back, catch the lift and find a note on my door saying that I should be quieter. No name, no nothing.

I say alright I might have been too loud... whatever... it is the first time. At 09:45 while drinking my well deserved coffee and reading the news my doorbell rang, who could it possible be?, I asked to myself. The neighbor with the Police!! Before starting asking questions they told her to piss off and go home. I let them in and asked them what was this all about. Apparently the neighbor got so angry to be woken up at 06:45 that she called the police saying that I was hitting my GF (she went to Belgium for the weekend) and screaming. She went a step further saying that she saw me leaving this morning with my hands covered with blood.

The police just said that there is no evidence of what she told them, that it is obvious that she has a mental problem and that she will be fined for disrupting me, they also offered me the chance to press charges against her (which I won't do as she is mentally ill). So at 11 or so they left. Time for a second walk with my puppy, she comes out of her apartment and calls me. She invited me for coffee and her husband explained to me that she is bipolar with something else and that they are very very sorry. Outside another neighbor approaches and says that it is not the first time.

I'd much rather have one of those standard bastards that complaint about footsteps or leave dog poop in your mailbox.

Although in this very particular case the subject is Swiss I am aware it can happen with anyone anywhere.

Sorry, I just needed to vent.

Guest 01.08.2015 12:40

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
:goodpost: Let it out. That is a story & a half. Good luck for future episodes.

J_T 01.08.2015 13:56

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
That was fun.

Subscribed for the next chapter. :msncool:

SOBEIT 01.08.2015 15:05

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Classic - only in Switzerland.

Guest 01.08.2015 15:21

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
You are lucky she's bipolar. At least, she's nice 50% of the time :D

porsch1909 01.08.2015 15:41

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
So where did you hide the body?

Village Idiot 01.08.2015 15:50

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by porsch1909 (Post 2427386)
So where did you hide the body?


(she "went" to Belgium for the weekend)

Did you never see Weekend at Bernie's?

Urs Max 01.08.2015 16:07

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Well done :D
Now that the police know your neighbor has a mental problem they'll dismiss any future calls, so you can "take care" of your GF all you want.

Anjela 01.08.2015 16:27

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
At least the husband had the good grace to apologise for his wife's behaviour and has offered you an explanation for it.

If you know your dog is going to start 'jumping and crying to go out' every morning at 6.45, perhaps you could try to be a good neighbour too and pre-empt the noise by walking her at six-thirty for a while, or possibly as late in the evening as possible to empty her bladder?
A bit of a pain I know but I think I'd also be pretty fed-up about being disturbed every morning by someone else's dog.

dachshund 01.08.2015 16:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anjela (Post 2427406)
At least the husband had the good grace to apologise for his wife's behaviour and has offered you an explanation for it.

If you know your dog is going to start 'jumping and crying to go out' everymorning at 6.45, perhaps you could try to be a good neighbour too and pre-empt the noise by walking her at six-thirty for a while, or possibly as late in the evening as possible to empty her bladder?
A bit of a pain I know but I think I'd also be pretty fed-up about being disturbed every morning by someone else's dog.


We have a 5cm thick carpet and a sound barrier panel underneath it where she sleeps to avoid noise. I am sure she is unable to hear anything coming from that room. Her problem is my door, which does make a lot of noise when opening or closing (reported to the landlord many times but he says noise is not a problem big enough to have it changed. My landlord is also hers).

Quote:

Originally Posted by porsch1909 (Post 2427386)
So where did you hide the body?

I usually hide them in the kitchen. Chunk 'em into small pieces and fill a couple Zürisäcke with it.

Is it done differently in CH? :D:D:D

doropfiz 01.08.2015 16:49

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Okay, I find the above responses witty... so I must have been on this Forum for a while. :)

Dachshund, for your sanity, it is absolutely great that the police really did arrive and also that her husband spoke to you. I can truly sympathise, as I once had a really, really seriously mentally ill neighbour who caused a lot of trouble.

I suggest you document everything as, sadly, this is unlikely to be a once-off incident. As far as possible, get the names and addresses an direct phone numbers (and ideally email-addresses) of every police officer you speak to. If you don't have that of those who visited you, that's fine... it's a reason to go down to the Police Station to ask them, and to thank them for their intervention.

And of the husband.neighbour. And the other neighbours.

Then try to meet the husband-neighbour alone, or better still with your GF, if she lives with you at least some of the time.

He will probably be very grateful if you make it clear (as you have done in this thread) that though the incident upset and angered you, you do not, in fact, intend to press charges, as you understand that his wife is mentally ill.

Ask him for advice... what you should do if there is any further unpleasant incident.
Ask him for contact details: can you call him during the day and night, and on what number?
Ask him if you may have the telephone numbers (and ideally email addresses) of his wife's emergency contact persons, e.g. doctors, crisis centres, psychologists, nurses, parents, siblings or adult children, etc.

Once you've had that conversation, go down to the Police Station, and ask to talk to someone about when they came by to you. The purpose of that visit it twofold:
a) to demonstrate, by a calm demeanour, that you are a responsible citizen (and not the crazy one), and
b) to get them to write something about it in a file.

A police officer (not involved in the case) gave me the tip to do this.
He advised me to stay in the Police Station as long as possible, repeatedly expressing my concern about my neighbour's health, telling them that I want the situation to get better, and asking for their advice about how to proceed next time, if there is anything that causes me, or my other neighbours, upset, and thanking them for having spoken rationally to me and for helping to keep the trouble to a minimum. That officer said I should remain in the Station, talking, asking, expressing concern and gratitude, until I could get someone to actually make notes, a record, of my visit. And to ask for their card with the name of the person I spoke to.

Then to go to the neighbours, (the husband first, of course) and tell them you did that, and that Officer Mr X was very understanding and helpful, and them give them the contact details on the card, too.

Document all you have done, with date and time.

This tactic helps to ensure that there are not dozens of silly rumours, but to channel the information sensibly. And to make the file thicker.

Next incident, go through the same procedure again. If you can find a way to contact the doctors involved, do so. They are not allowed to discuss anything with you, of course, but they can receive information from you.

Once you have a few rounds of this, you can mail all the professionals (not the neighbours). Remember that they are not allowed to talk to one another, because of their professional data protection. Therefore, the therapist may not know at all that the police were involved, and the police may perhaps not even know that there is a doctor on the case, or of they do, who that doctor is. But you are outside of that, as long as you remain courteous and say nothing that is untrue.

The professionals are not allowed to reply to you with information about the woman and can, at most, simply say that they have received your mail (ask them to do that minimum). But in the case of my neighbour, it was only when I mailed all the professionals simultaneously, explaining the conversations I had had with each separate officer/therapist/social worker, etc., that they could each discover the missing parts of the puzzle. That opened the way, at last, for effective steps to be taken to find my neighbour better therapy (and, what a blessing, other housing) and only then did the situation de-escalate.

I wish you peace and wisdom!


P.S. just read your further post about the door. That's another of those things to document. And include in your circular mails. Who knows, the therapist may understand a deeper significance to this (e.g. a trigger/stimulus to remembering a trauma) and be able to bring the necessary persuasion to the landlord to fix the door.

Anjela 01.08.2015 16:49

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dachshund (Post 2427409)
We have a 5cm thick carpet and a sound barrier panel underneath it where she sleeps to avoid noise. I am sure she is unable to hear anything coming from that room. Her problem is my door, which does make a lot of noise when opening or closing (reported to the landlord many times but he says noise is not a problem big enough to have it changed. My landlord is also hers).

You'd be surprised how even the smallest of noises can disturb people, especially if they're sensitised to it.

Anyway, if you think it's the front door that's at fault explain to the landlord that it's disturbing your neighbours and insist he does something about it!!!!

It's almost certainly not necessary to change it (assuming he means replacing the whole door), but is more likely a question of changing the hinges or perhaps the lock mechanism... depending on where the noise is coming from. It must be annoying for you and everyone in the building if it makes a lot of noise every time you open or close it.

3Wishes 01.08.2015 16:50

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dachshund (Post 2427409)
...I usually hide them in the kitchen. Chunk 'em into small pieces and fill a couple Zürisäcke with it.

Is it done differently in CH? :D:D:D

You will get fined for not composting your organic waste. ;) Oh dear this is almost a Friday thread...

dachshund 01.08.2015 17:04

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by doropfiz (Post 2427413)
Okay, I find the above responses witty... so I must have been on this Forum for a while. :)

Dachshund, for your sanity, it is absolutely great that the police really did arrive and also that her husband spoke to you. I can truly sympathise, as I once had a really, really seriously mentally ill neighbour who caused a lot of trouble.

I suggest you document everything as, sadly, this is unlikely to be a once-off incident. As far as possible, get the names and addresses an direct phone numbers (and ideally email-addresses) of every police officer you speak to. If you don't have that of those who visited you, that's fine... it's a reason to go down to the Police Station to ask them, and to thank them for their intervention.

I asked the police to send me a report, with their names, the name of my neighbor and to state that they also consider her mentally ill. They said not a problem and that it should arrive next week.

I called my landlord after the incident and explained everything (gotta love Wallisdüütsch) all he said was to call him if this happens again and that he will ask her to leave the apartment as it is not the first time. He also offered to fix the door.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anjela (Post 2427414)
You'd be surprised how even the smallest of noises can disturb people, especially if they're sensitised to it.

Anyway, if you think it's the front door that's at fault explain to the landlord that it's disturbing your neighbours and insist he does something about it!!!!

It's almost certainly not necessary to change it (assuming he means replacing the whole door), but is more likely a question of changing the hinges or perhaps the lock mechanism... depending on where the noise is coming from. It must be annoying for you and everyone in the building if it makes a lot of noise every time you open or close it.

I am positive that industrial sound isolation would block any sound wave that is propagated vertically. So even if she would have the hearing range of dog she wouldn't be able to hear a thing from that room.

I'll get someone to check the door next week and send the bill to my landlord.

doropfiz 01.08.2015 19:18

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
If you get someone to check the door, yourself, at your own bidding, then you are liable to pay that bill yourself. You cannot, in general, assume that the landlord will pick up the tab. Moreover, you may well upset your landlord (and it seems you're getting on quite well with him, now) if you just send him a bill, especially since he offered to fix the door.

As this is a very, very common bone of contention amongst tenants and landlords in Switzerland, I'd urge you to first ask him if he is going to look at the door himself, or if he would prefer you to get someone in on your time (and his expense).


And would you please post a link, here, to that industrial sound insulation you have? I'm sure many here could be glad of such an effective barrier! Thanks.

dachshund 01.08.2015 20:44

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by doropfiz (Post 2427444)
If you get someone to check the door, yourself, at your own bidding, then you are liable to pay that bill yourself. You cannot, in general, assume that the landlord will pick up the tab. Moreover, you may well upset your landlord (and it seems you're getting on quite well with him, now) if you just send him a bill, especially since he offered to fix the door.

As this is a very, very common bone of contention amongst tenants and landlords in Switzerland, I'd urge you to first ask him if he is going to look at the door himself, or if he would prefer you to get someone in on your time (and his expense).


And would you please post a link, here, to that industrial sound insulation you have? I'm sure many here could be glad of such an effective barrier! Thanks.


Yes sir! I am aware of how that works. He told me to do it myself and as usual I asked him to send me an e-mail confirming this. We have done it in the past and it has never been a problem :msnnerd::msnnerd:


These: http://www.swilo.ch/de/schallschutzm...mm-bi50sk.html
are the ones we use and on top a pretty thick carpet. Also the room is 30% covered with acoustic foam. I play the guitar in there as well. They are cheaper in germany but these people need to eat as well ;-)

Urs Max 02.08.2015 12:37

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

I usually hide them in the kitchen. Chunk 'em into small pieces and fill a couple Zürisäcke with it.

Is it done differently in CH? :D:D:D
Fail. You're supposed to use grey/black bags and deposit them in the neighbor community.

Obviously you still have a lot of integrating to do :D:D

JagWaugh 02.08.2015 14:15

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dachshund (Post 2427343)
The police just said that there is no evidence of what she told them, that it is obvious that she has a mental problem and that she will be fined for disrupting me, they also offered me the chance to press charges against her (which I won't do as she is mentally ill). So at 11 or so they left. Time for a second walk with my puppy, she comes out of her apartment and calls me. She invited me for coffee and her husband explained to me that she is bipolar with something else and that they are very very sorry. Outside another neighbor approaches and says that it is not the first time.

I'd much rather have one of those standard bastards that complaint about footsteps or leave dog poop in your mailbox.

Although in this very particular case the subject is Swiss I am aware it can happen with anyone anywhere.

Sorry, I just needed to vent.



Good on you for not pressing charges and handling it well. Bipolar people can be a challenge at the best of times, giving them a justifiable ground for a persecution complex isn't going to make your life any easier.

batucada 03.08.2015 11:08

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
It sounds like you are well on your way to some kind of resolution.

I will digress a bit and just say that bipolar disorder is something that can be medically treated with a bit of patience and persistence, and that one can have it and be a fully functioning and normal individual. I don't have it myself thankfully, but I was astonished to hear that one of my former colleagues has it and is a totally normal and pretty awesome all around person! It totally changed my outlook on mental illness.

I hope that your neighbor will get some treatment to improve her life and the lives of those around her.

cheesey 04.08.2015 08:34

Re: The ultimate Swiss neighbor
 
Collect egg boxes. Then give them to her husband so that he can glue them to his ceiling. Or he may chose to make a caccoon out of them and hide. He's the one I feel most sorry for in all this. Him and the copper who has to deal with stuff like this.


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