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Old 29.11.2019, 18:34
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Shoot the parents!

Clumsiest kid in the school arrives in class today with a "ruler" in the shape of a Toblerone bar filled in with water...within seconds she bangs the wretched thing on her desk, there's a" flood" in the classroom (liquid from ruler and tears from the kid who is upset).


We calm the little angel down, mop up the floor to avoid anyone slipping and breaking a leg or an arm...then ten minutes later same kid takes out of a bag a "pencil sharpener and container" in the shape of a Big Mac...the frigging top comes off and here's little darling with pencil shavings all over her laps and (still wet) floor.


Then we have the giant pencil in the shape of a pink flamingo!


I want to shake some people! Especially when I provide all the stationery (just plain normal and functional), it's obviously not show-off enough.


Rant over, it's the week-end! Yeah!
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Old 29.11.2019, 19:16
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Re: Shoot the parents!

Eat a croissant....
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Old 29.11.2019, 19:16
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Clumsiest kid in the school arrives in class today with a "ruler" in the shape of a Toblerone bar filled in with water...within seconds she bangs the wretched thing on her desk, there's a" flood" in the classroom (liquid from ruler and tears from the kid who is upset).


We calm the little angel down, mop up the floor to avoid anyone slipping and breaking a leg or an arm...then ten minutes later same kid takes out of a bag a "pencil sharpener and container" in the shape of a Big Mac...the frigging top comes off and here's little darling with pencil shavings all over her laps and (still wet) floor.


Then we have the giant pencil in the shape of a pink flamingo!


I want to shake some people! Especially when I provide all the stationery (just plain normal and functional), it's obviously not show-off enough.


Rant over, it's the week-end! Yeah!
Glad you wern't stabbed with the flamingo.
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Old 29.11.2019, 19:40
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Glad you wern't stabbed with the flamingo.
Stabbed by a Flamingo? It‘s Bad enough dancing with the buggers.
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Old 29.11.2019, 19:47
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Glad you wern't stabbed with the flamingo.

At least it's a flamingo and not a dildo! Nothing would surprise me nowadays!
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Old 29.11.2019, 22:54
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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At least it's a flamingo and not a dildo! Nothing would surprise me nowadays!
I had a kid bring her mum's in once. Had taken it out to show her friends in form time... I had to do the stern clipped thing when inside I was weeping with laughter.
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Old 30.11.2019, 01:15
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Re: Shoot the parents!

I got somebody a mini guitar case lunch box. Millions of stickers all over it.

Get over it, McTavge. It can seriously be so much worse.
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Old 30.11.2019, 10:45
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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At least it's a flamingo and not a dildo! Nothing would surprise me nowadays!



Is there any difference ?
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Old 30.11.2019, 16:36
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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I got somebody a mini guitar case lunch box. Millions of stickers all over it.

Get over it, McTavge. It can seriously be so much worse.


At least 15 minutes of fantastic learning down the drain, so to speak, because of some gadgets? Of course it could be worse, but we're a school, not a bazar.
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Old 30.11.2019, 16:41
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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At least 15 minutes of fantastic learning down the drain, so to speak, because of some gadgets? Of course it could be worse, but we're a school, not a bazar.
Do you want to see my "teaching pen"? The pompon attached is bigger than my head!

Of course that everyone wants to kill 15min of fantastic learning time talking about my whacko pen.

What do you think I do...

(Yes, it fits into my briefcase. Now back to your work.)

Last edited by MusicChick; 30.11.2019 at 17:26.
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Old 30.11.2019, 19:29
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Is there any difference ?



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At least 15 minutes of fantastic learning down the drain, so to speak, because of some gadgets? Of course it could be worse, but we're a school, not a bazar.
It's the pens with the daft cumbersome ends that frustrate me - springs and unicorn heads etc. Mind you they tend to be attached to the kids who are more concerned with what stuff looks like than what they are producing with it.
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Old 30.11.2019, 19:50
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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It's the pens with the daft cumbersome ends that frustrate me - springs and unicorn heads etc. Mind you they tend to be attached to the kids who are more concerned with what stuff looks like than what they are producing with it.
I agree absolutely.
Also, for some reason having the latest crazy gadget is often a token or a bargaining chip for acceptance on the playground.
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Old 30.11.2019, 20:18
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Clumsiest kid in the school arrives in class today with a "ruler" in the shape of a Toblerone bar filled in with water...within seconds she bangs the wretched thing on her desk, there's a" flood" in the classroom (liquid from ruler and tears from the kid who is upset).


We calm the little angel down, mop up the floor to avoid anyone slipping and breaking a leg or an arm...then ten minutes later same kid takes out of a bag a "pencil sharpener and container" in the shape of a Big Mac...the frigging top comes off and here's little darling with pencil shavings all over her laps and (still wet) floor.


Then we have the giant pencil in the shape of a pink flamingo!


I want to shake some people! Especially when I provide all the stationery (just plain normal and functional), it's obviously not show-off enough.


Rant over, it's the week-end! Yeah!
Have no idea what you are going-on about, so am pretty revolte. But hey, if a teenage did that then it sound s pretty cool
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Old 01.12.2019, 10:14
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Have no idea what you are going-on about, so am pretty revolte. But hey, if a teenage did that then it sound s pretty cool


"You've groaned at me"??? That's the romance gone!


My point was that parents splash out money on gadgetry that is completely useless and against school policy regarding material (a specific list is issued at the start of the year and there is no room for interpretation), crap usually made of yet more plastic (when Geneva is trying to go non-re useable plastic free by end of 2020), this act as a distractor for a child who REALLY doesn't need more distraction, it creates an unnecessary envy from other kids and finally, when you know your child is clumsy with a tendency to break things every day, you DO NOT provide them with an oversized ruler filled with water.


I could carry on the whole Sunday (shitty weather in Geneva, not going anywhere!), but you get the gist. You may now double click me a "like"!
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Old 01.12.2019, 10:32
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Re: Shoot the parents!

After surviving Black Friday you may want to call in sick tomorrow just out of precaution.
Tomorrow is Cyber Monday.
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Old 01.12.2019, 10:35
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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After surviving Black Friday you may want to call in sick tomorrow just out of precaution.
Tomorrow is Cyber Monday.


It's Cyber Day every day on EF!
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Old 01.12.2019, 10:37
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Re: Shoot the parents!

As a teacher myself, I sometimes wonder what parents will invent next to make my job more difficult. Glittery ink that leaves ALL your copies and bag glittery forever? Check. Soft Architect erasers which make great projectiles when sent all over the class? Check. Fruit scented glue which makes your class smell like toilet freshener? Check.
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Old 01.12.2019, 11:46
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Re: Shoot the parents!

All legit reasons to have fun when teaching.

I got the most fab revenge nailed, though...I send kids home with many many paper planes. Sharp and very pointy tips.

The girl who won the last competition will defo be an aircraft engineer.
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Old 01.12.2019, 12:05
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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As a teacher myself, I sometimes wonder what parents will invent next to make my job more difficult. Glittery ink that leaves ALL your copies and bag glittery forever? Check. Soft Architect erasers which make great projectiles when sent all over the class? Check. Fruit scented glue which makes your class smell like toilet freshener? Check.
Some kid in another class created glittery art, and the assistant laminated it ... laminator ate the page, jammed up completely, and is now full of glitter.

Glitter is the most evil substance in existence and those who manufacture it should be stopped!
It's even worse than those plasticine erasers (soft, gooey, can be separated and squished back together) which the kids play with all day, until they drop it and somebody grinds it into the carpet with their foot. We still have a piece left from the last time we reissued our blanket ban on the stuff three years ago, gradually getting smaller as some kid begs to hear the story and then spends about an hour to pick out half a gram of the stuff. I mean, at least the colour almost matches the carpet, so it doesn't stick out like the proverbial - it also doesn't spread like the plague until every surface is infected.
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Old 01.12.2019, 12:08
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Re: Shoot the parents!

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Some kid in another class created glittery art, and the assistant laminated it ... laminator ate the page, jammed up completely, and is now full of glitter.

Glitter is the most evil substance in existence and those who manufacture it should be stopped!
It's even worse than those plasticine erasers (soft, gooey, can be separated and squished back together) which the kids play with all day, until they drop it and somebody grinds it into the carpet with their foot. We still have a piece left from the last time we reissued our blanket ban on the stuff three years ago, gradually getting smaller as some kid begs to hear the story and then spends about an hour to pick out half a gram of the stuff. I mean, at least the colour almost matches the carpet, so it doesn't stick out like the proverbial - it also doesn't spread like the plague until every surface is infected.

Also Glitter and kids don't do well together, ask Gary!
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