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  #21  
Old 01.05.2012, 00:12
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

I just want to "re-hash" this old thread...b/c I am sure I am not the only one feeling sad for all these innocent (lovely) pets.

As with all topics on this forum, it is cyclical, but still, we are talking about living beings, not just salaries or housing or goods for sale.

And as I said the first time, I know circumstances arise but...<sigh>.

Say it with me now...FOR-EV-ER.
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Old 01.05.2012, 00:23
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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I just want to "re-hash" this old thread...b/c I am sure I am not the only one feeling sad for all these innocent (lovely) pets.

As with all topics on this forum, it is cyclical, but still, we are talking about living beings, not just salaries or housing or goods for sale.

And as I said the first time, I know circumstances arise but...<sigh>.

Say it with me now...FOR-EV-ER.
In an ideal world, yes. However, few of us actually live in ideal worlds and, much as it pains us enormously, sometimes we have to part with our beloved pets. Sometimes circumstances occur in our lives that our beyond our control and we pet owners, much as it pains us, have to do our utmost to ensure that our pets go to a loving new home.

I am saying this as it happened to me. It broke my heart at the time but I am happy in the knowledge that my lovely little cat went to a gorgeous, loving home where she is flourishing and happy.
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Old 01.05.2012, 00:31
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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In an ideal world, yes. However, few of us actually live in ideal worlds and, much as it pains us enormously, sometimes we have to part with our beloved pets. Sometimes circumstances occur in our lives that our beyond our control and we pet owners, much as it pains us, have to do our utmost to ensure that our pets go to a loving new home.

I am saying this as it happened to me. It broke my heart at the time but I am happy in the knowledge that my lovely little cat went to a gorgeous, loving home where she is flourishing and happy.
...as I said already, circumstances arise. I know it is difficult. I am not saying it isn't. But you are supposed to consider things even outside of what you can plan for when the livelihood of another being depends on you. And by "you", I mean the collective "you" (not you personally).

I have pets. I have had pets all my life. And I have had to make tough choices too. But never once did that include giving one away. For me, the animal is permanent...until one of us dies. full stop.
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Old 01.05.2012, 00:47
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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...as I said already, circumstances arise. I know it is difficult. I am not saying it isn't. But you are supposed to consider things even outside of what you can plan for when the livelihood of another being depends on you. And by "you", I mean the collective "you" (not you personally).

I have pets. I have had pets all my life. And I have had to make tough choices too. But never once did that include giving one away. For me, the animal is permanent...until one of us dies. full stop.
Good for you. However, I did not have that choice so, in the circumstances, did the best that I could for my cat. One can never predict what may happen to you in your life and do you honestly think that "I did not consider things even outside of what you can plan for when the livelihood of another being depends on you"? In my own case I had to make the extremely difficult decision as to what was best for my cat's future happiness and well-being, and that meant leaving her in loving care in an environment that she was used to and one in which I knew that she would thrive.

In addition to which, six months ago I adopted the cat of a friend who was leaving the country to live in Ireland in an environment with two dogs. That was a difficult decision for her but I can assure you that her (my) cat is now incredibly happy in her new home and as much loved as she ever was. Animals, like humans, can (and do) adapt.

PS: I see that meloncollie is thanking all of JLF's posts and thus agreeing with her/his sentiments ..... whilst at the same time wishing another poster good luck in re-homing their cat ...

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Old 01.05.2012, 01:23
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

This isn't a personal attack on you or anyone else (hence the "collective you" in a previous post).

I am expressing my frustration and sadness for the situations that so many animals seem to be in at the moment...this is, after all, what the complaints corner is for.

We all do what we can. I never said you didn't. I never said anyone else didn't either. And, like meloncollie (who is an animal-lover, like me), I am hopeful that these animals will find new homes and thankful that re-homing is happening...that we have success stories like Sutter's.

I am just sad for the animals...
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Old 01.05.2012, 01:30
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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This isn't a personal attack on you or anyone else (hence the "collective you" in a previous post).

I am expressing my frustration and sadness for the situations that so many animals seem to be in at the moment...this is, after all, what the complaints corner is for.

We all do what we can. I never said you didn't. I never said anyone else didn't either. And, like meloncollie (who is an animal-lover, like me), I am hopeful that these animals will find new homes and thankful that re-homing is happening...that we have success stories like Sutter's.

I am just sad for the animals...
I too am an animal lover (in case you hadn't noticed). And why be sad for the animals? I am absolutely certain that the cats that Sutter has very kindly taken on will be as happy with her as they were in their previous home.

(And yet another thank for you from meloncollie, who has chosen to ignore my comment above and obviously doesn't recognise that I am a fellow animal lover).
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Old 01.05.2012, 01:43
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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PS: I see that meloncollie is thanking all of JLF's posts and thus agreeing with her/his sentiments ..... whilst at the same time wishing another poster good luck in re-homing their cat ...
I see no contradiction here.

You'll notice that what I actually said was "Hope your cat finds a loving forever home."

Further judgement is not relevent to that thread.

But as most folks here already know - I do not condone giving up a pet.

Working in rescue, I've probably seen it all. At some point you simply become numb, roll up your sleeves, and get on with it. The only thing I care about anymore is the animals.
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Old 01.05.2012, 01:48
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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The only thing I care about anymore is the animals.
Me too.......
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  #29  
Old 01.05.2012, 01:57
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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I too am an animal lover (in case you hadn't noticed). And why be sad for the animals? I am absolutely certain that the cats that Sutter has very kindly taken on will be as happy with her as they were in their previous home.
You are right. In the cases where the animals are re-homed properly (as with Sutter's and yours), usually they will be fine...and usually they do adapt.

But there are also the cases where the re-homing isn't done properly. It happens all the time, and a lot more than we hear about on the EF (or in any other "news" outlets for that matter). These are the concern...these are why I am sad for the animals. And it goes back (for me) to the principal of making your home a "forever" one so the animal doesn't have to be re-homed in the first place.

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Working in rescue, I've probably seen it all. At some point you simply become numb, roll up your sleeves, and get on with it. The only thing I care about anymore is the animals.

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Me too.......
Me three.
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Old 01.05.2012, 09:00
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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...as I said already, circumstances arise. I know it is difficult. I am not saying it isn't. But you are supposed to consider things even outside of what you can plan for when the livelihood of another being depends on you. And by "you", I mean the collective "you" (not you personally).

I have pets. I have had pets all my life. And I have had to make tough choices too. But never once did that include giving one away. For me, the animal is permanent...until one of us dies. full stop.
I believed that too until I realized my little cat was deeply unhappy living in an household with a baby. How should I prevent that?? There were no ways to figure it out until an actual baby came into the house.

After one year of hiding, I should have keep her going through this because I have to keep her until she dies? No, I found her a family without kids where she could be the queen of the house and become an happy cat again.

My other cat, Toutoune, loves kids. I could see the difference so badly ta it was cruel for me to keep her in an environment she hated.

Yes, sometimes there is special situations.
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Old 01.05.2012, 12:33
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

Agreed Nil!
I haven't owned a pet for years now as our circumstances would not be suitable for one. However were we to have had a pet when we had our baby, the baby would have come first. EVERY time.
Anyone who keeps a pet that acts aggressively towards a baby or child is irresponsible, no matter how often others say that 'it can be managed'. No it can't and it shouldn't be tolerated if a child is at risk.
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  #32  
Old 01.05.2012, 12:57
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

Of course a child should come first. But this is something that should be thought through before becoming a pet owner.

(This is one of the reasons the rescue with which I volunteer has a guideline of not rehoming to families with young children.)

As I said when this thread first appeared, I would urge anyone considering getting a pet:

If you can even imagine a situation where you would give up your pet, for any reason - please do not get a pet at this time. Wait until your life is at a point where you can whole-heartedly make the necessary committment.
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Old 01.05.2012, 13:13
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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Of course a child should come first. But this is something that should be thought through before becoming a pet owner.

(This is one of the reasons the rescue with which I volunteer has a guideline of not rehoming to families with young children.)

As I said when this thread first appeared, I would urge anyone considering getting a pet:

If you can even imagine a situation where you would give up your pet, for any reason - please do not get a pet at this time. Wait until your life is at a point where you can whole-heartedly make the necessary committment.
I am a pet owner for ever, we always had animals in me family and I got my cat 12 years ago. I got my dog and my other cat 11 years ago. I didn't know my dog would die in the fire of my appartment at age 5 and the two cats would survive. Nor tha I knew I would broke up with my then fiancé and meet my husband in an other country. Nor that I knew that I will give birth of a girl at age 32.

I made sure at all time that my pets had everything thy needed. Many times they ate before I could afford to feed myself. With all the love and care, I couldn't prevent my appartment to burn and take my dog with.

Like I couldNt plan that my cat will hate to share me with a baby, that she will be so scared of her. What should I have done? Not have a cat a the first place? Why? Toutoune is 17 years old, has been with me for 12 years, in 4 differents countries, met tons of people and fight like crazy to stay with me longer.

She loves the kids and I couldn't think a cat could be so cool. My little one can't stand them, it would have been cruel and irresponsible for me to force her to live in an household she wasn't happy anymore.

Should I choose to not have a child without knowing how she would take it? Should I had choose to not have her andlet the farmer drown her bacause no one wanted to adopt his already too many cats on the farm?

Come on, life change, situations change, it doesn't mean people are irresponsible and heartless. What about the well being of the animal???

Sometimes,it is much more responsible to find an other family for the cat than keeping him or her in a situation that make his life miserable.
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Old 01.05.2012, 13:16
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

We adopted roxy and charlie on Sunday 2 cats ( Sisters ) and they have settled in right at Home.
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Old 01.05.2012, 13:29
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

I have moved so many times in my adult life, and I got my first dog when I was 25 years old. That dog is 15 this year, and he's still with me here in Switzerland. Every decision I ever made, every time I ever moved, for richer, for poorer, when I was down with knee surgeries, shoulder surgeries, traveling for work or whatever... I always made sure that he and my other dog were cared for and/or could go with me. My first question whenever I look at an apartment is "not how much is it?" or "when is it available?" Not at all. My first question is "do you allow DOGSzzzzz?" This is my first question because it's the deal breaker. Usually the answer is "no" or " just one". At which point I terminate the call. I'll keep looking. I've had to take apartments that were further away from work than ideal because they allowed two dogs, and the rent was right, and the pet deposit was right, etc.

And if Switzerland had a pet quarantine like the UK used to have, then I wouldn't have taken this job. That would also have been a deal breaker. The vet in the US almost didn't issue my 15 year old his health certificate because of a heart murmur, which I had to see a canine cardiologist for. If the cardiologist hadn't cleared him, then he would not have been able to travel. I would not have given him up though, I would have turned down the job. (believe me... that possibility was very real)

Me and my dogs are a package deal wherever we go, and being a dog owner means making sacrifices. Now we are leaving Switzerland and the dogs are going back with me. Budgeting for my move means making sure I have money for their transportation costs and any pet fees in hotels, their health certificates, etc. I can't have an excuse that leads to having to give them up. It's simply not an acceptable circumstance. I will go into debt before I allow my dogs to be rehomed.

To me, this is what it means to be a responsible pet owner, and to provide a FOREVER home for my pets. I am the only alternative they have.
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Old 01.05.2012, 13:54
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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Well said Nil.

I sometimes wonder whether all the more self-righteous amongst us actually act for purely altruistic reasons.

They are making an assumption that re-homing is wrong, per se, which it absolutely is not. As mentioned above, I adopted a friend's cat about six months ago as, due to extenuating circumstances, she had to leave the country and would be living with dogs. In the circumstances, she felt that it would be kinder for Ping to stay in the country and environment that she knows (different climate) and with someone who would love her as much as she does. This has worked perfectly and Ping is now a loving, and loved, part of our family.
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Old 01.05.2012, 14:09
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

I believe that sometimes, in individual cases, it can be ethical to find a new home for a pet. It can be and usually is heartbreaking, as it was for NSchuzi and for Nil. I don’t give myself the luxury of judging anybody’s decisions or life circumstances. Saying good bye does not mean that you stop loving your pet.
I just try not to think in absolutes regarding anything, especially ethics.
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Old 01.05.2012, 14:41
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

this is an interesting thread- i too noticed the rise in pets to be re-homed here, mostly cats, it seems. i admire and agree that when we choose to take a pet into our lives and families, it should be with the mind set that it is a family member- i also know that circumstances and ability to cope with difficult situations and life changes creates a real issue for what is best for a pet.

when we left ny, we had two cats. outdoor mostly- they had lot's of land and space to hunt, roam and enjoy. we had tried to get them in for the most part, but they wouldn't have it- not even for more than a cuddle and a bite to eat in the winter. we had a really difficult decision to make on whether we would be doing the best for them by bringing them here, to an apartment and indoor cat life which they refused for so long. we were lucky that my parents, who lived very close to our old home loved these two and wanted to keep them, so they could continue to roam, hunt and enjoy the area that they knew their whole lives. it was so hard, my son is and was very attached to them and he wanted them to come and we really struggled with what would be best. in that situation we decided that it would be better for them to stay in ny with people who loved them as much as we did and have the space and freedom that they were used to, instead of an apartment and very little to keep them occupied, except toys- which outdoor cats have little use for.

it was against my beliefs to 'give up' the two, but looking back now i think it would've been a bit cruel to bring them thru all the changes because we wanted them with us. we ended up getting two cats here, indoor from the beginning and content with toys and a settled life. we know that if, for some reason, we had to leave these two would be along for the ride-regardless, because we don't have the same issues and flexibility we had before. and we took this into account when we chose to take these two. but i'm sure, whoever has to make that difficult decision to rehome their pets don't take it lightly- it's not easy but if they are at the point where they know they can't take care of their pet the way they deserve, perhaps it is better for the pet to be elsewhere?

i wonder, if it is different in rehoming cats vs. dogs? just curious...
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Old 01.05.2012, 14:50
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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this is an interesting thread- i too noticed the rise in pets to be re-homed here, mostly cats, it seems. i admire and agree that when we choose to take a pet into our lives and families, it should be with the mind set that it is a family member- i also know that circumstances and ability to cope with difficult situations and life changes creates a real issue for what is best for a pet.

when we left ny, we had two cats. outdoor mostly- they had lot's of land and space to hunt, roam and enjoy. we had tried to get them in for the most part, but they wouldn't have it- not even for more than a cuddle and a bite to eat in the winter. we had a really difficult decision to make on whether we would be doing the best for them by bringing them here, to an apartment and indoor cat life which they refused for so long. we were lucky that my parents, who lived very close to our old home loved these two and wanted to keep them, so they could continue to roam, hunt and enjoy the area that they knew their whole lives. it was so hard, my son is and was very attached to them and he wanted them to come and we really struggled with what would be best. in that situation we decided that it would be better for them to stay in ny with people who loved them as much as we did and have the space and freedom that they were used to, instead of an apartment and very little to keep them occupied, except toys- which outdoor cats have little use for.

it was against my beliefs to 'give up' the two, but looking back now i think it would've been a bit cruel to bring them thru all the changes because we wanted them with us. we ended up getting two cats here, indoor from the beginning and content with toys and a settled life. we know that if, for some reason, we had to leave these two would be along for the ride-regardless, because we don't have the same issues and flexibility we had before. and we took this into account when we chose to take these two. but i'm sure, whoever has to make that difficult decision to rehome their pets don't take it lightly- it's not easy but if they are at the point where they know they can't take care of their pet the way they deserve, perhaps it is better for the pet to be elsewhere?

It reminds me a bit the Free Willie story :-)
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Old 01.05.2012, 15:59
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Re: Pets and a Sense of Responsibility

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It reminds me a bit the Free Willie story :-)
then i'm sure there must be two different movies with that title cuz, um...
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