If you were looking for the archetype of tidiness then do not look further because he's living just next to me, my dear neighbour. His garden serves probably as model for the gardener magazines. His green and perfect lawn does not have time to enter in contact with a falling leaf or a dandelion. My neighbour is a lawn-doctor and he leaves no space or time for an emerging wild plant, he spends hours on his knees cutting, shaping and taking care of every single herb. Every object in his garden has a reason for being there and staying there. There is no tolerance for individual initiatives or breaking of ranks. He's the general and the entire garden obeys silently for spring and summer is the battle season.
During the winter, my first reaction when I wake up is to check anxiously from the window if the night was snowy and if I need to shovel snow. Every time I drive by his house I discreetly check his entrance and it leaves me always with this bitter impression that all the snow obediently avoided his house and concentrated on our houses. I then start wondering why he removed so nicely the snow, he's retired and he almost never leaves his house and receives 3-4 visits from his acquaintances and only during spring and summer.
He retired not only from work but almost from social life. He's not the most popular among the farmers as he keeps complaining about the cow's bells; he was once politely told that the cows were here in the village before him. He has no contacts to the neighbours except the short morning or evening greeting loaded with a reproachful stare because of my plants slightly invading his Lebensraum. Yes, I am not a talented gardeener and as tidy although I sense an envious admiration when observing his garden. I recently noticed that he's put nets under his roof to prevent any bird to come and nest there. My house is hosting 2 nests under the roof and the twigs they leave around would have been a war declaration in his garden. I like the idea of this lives nesting and growing under my roof. Picking up their twigs in the morning is like collecting my kids toys strewn over the garden.
My neighbor does not have kids and we don't know if it's by choice. I feel sorry sometimes for him as I get the impression that he's the lonely guardian of a museum or graveyard without visitors

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Resist, support, donate: ACLU
They tried to bury us, they did not know that we are seeds (Mexican proverb)

Hey, pop by for a drink. I've been meaning to say hi...I have some...things... I would like to ...share with you.

Ok, I am curious. Do you like him or don't you?

I agree though, pop by. It could be the start of a beautiful bromance.

Mr Vertico feels sorry for him ,for good reasons

Unless he's rolled and cut the lawn for 500 years, it can't possibly be perfect.

I feel sad for your neighbour. Like his house was a museum.

Everything stay the same, no matters what happens.

a Dead place.

Desperately filling the final minutes of life.
It could be us one day.

...and then there's the guy who lives next door to him who takes notice of all his little details...

...which made a nice story to share and that I enjoyed to read....

Hmmmm, this sounds very BRITISH to me .... Are you sure he's SWISS?

Very nice story. I once lived in a Flemish-speaking area of Brussels, and shared a 3 apartment block with 2 other British/ Irish families. We were the opposite to tidiness (the guy on the ground floor once had an old 2CV car that he he didn't know what do with, so he dug a huge hole in the garden and buried it!) The guy next door had a house with a 2-car garage, and every week he took every single item out of it to scrub the interior! I know that our Flemish neighbours were amazed at our casualness and gossiped about us. But we all lived in easy tolerance, and enjoyed the occasional neighbourhood barbecue.

It takes all sorts, and there's nothing so strange as folk!

The thought also occurred to me, too. Sounds like a gardening hobby.

Mr Vertigo - does he Kärcher-wash his wheelbarrow at the end of his gardening sessions? If so, he could be the neighbour that my parents had until a few years ago.

"Mum, you'll never guess; Mr Daffodil-tickler from No. 26 has moved to Switzerland!"

I am just looking out the window into the backyard where I grew up, crazy naughty greenery, wild bushes, big grass all over, many tall, untrimmed trees and kids in every inch of that jungle. I would hate the feeling of ultimate control over nature some people need...OCD, if you ask me. I don't think it has anything to do with esthetics. On the other hand, who are we to nag, it's his little kingdom. I love the idea of having my own garden one day, just to recreate some wild and poetic biodome there.

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"L'homme ne peut pas remplacer son coeur avec sa tete, ni sa tete avec ses mains." J.H. Pestalozzi

“The only difference between a rut and a grave is a matter of depth.” S.P. Cadman

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." A. Einstein

I don't hate or like him. He's more a source of interrogations on how I want to grow old.
He's ben invited many times to neighbours parties, but systematically declined. He clearly avoids contacts with everyone.

At least compared to my standards of gardening it does look perfect

We are in a small village, everyone knows everyone. With the years even if you don't take voluntarily notice of the details you'll see recurring patterns. During vacation every neighbour asks someome to take care of garden or house while they are away. He never asks and is never asked.

@sandgrounder @starfish
He's swiss-german and yes definitely makes extensive use of Kärcher. The only thing that I want to thank him for is that he does not have Gartenzwerge Or maybe he has them in a shrine inside, we don't know as nobody from the neighbourhood has been ever invited.

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Resist, support, donate: ACLU
They tried to bury us, they did not know that we are seeds (Mexican proverb)

Wild and poetic biodome - that's brilliant. I hate gardening and if we were ever lumbered with one I will use that description with gusto!

Not sure how we will explain the burnt out car, rusting next to the wheelie bins, though, which seems to be characteristic of the other end of the scale of British gardening enthusiasm...

Maybe he is afraid it will cost him something.

Does he even go on holidays anywhere?

What's Karcher?

Do you mind he lives differently? He sounds like a loner, or somebody who is happy avoiding society. Why would people have to live the same life, though. So what all community does things certain way. I like people who dare to be different, hermits. If I was an Autist, garden would be my church. Well, garden would be my church in any case...

How about asking him for advice in gardening?

Kärcher = high pressure washer. Good for shifting dirt off patios and wheelbarrows.

Lawn ornaments

He seems excellent to me, not a nuisance as he keeps himself to himself. Maybe he is a Russian sleeper, and they forgot about him?

Sounds like this guy is just a natural introvert and/or may be suffering some depression... perhaps due to a loss of a spouse. Maybe gardening is the one thing he has left in his life to provide him happiness and to take his mind off of other things. I think the nicest thing one could do is to honor his desire for privacy and to just cast him a friendly smile now and then.