Turned down my dinner invitation - Page 2

#21 30.06.2011, 23:34

	Quote:	Marsalforn
	I have a close friend who I have known for years. We often have dinner together, at his place or mine. We both have girlfriends, but neither of us live with them. I invited him to dinner at my place recently, going to great trouble to prepare to make him welcome. However, one day before, he cancelled, saying he had to see his girlfriend that night. I was furious, and still am. He sent me an SMS to apologise after telling me personally, but I didnt answer, as I feel pretty let down. He's a good mate. Do you think I am wrong to be angry? We work in the same bank, but I have now avoided him for 3 days. I dont want to stop being mates with a good friend, football mate, drinking buddy, but I am pretty pissed off. I hate cooking, but went out of my way to get in stuff for a nice evening. My girlfriend says drop him, as you just dont do that to a friend. What do you think?

Hmmm, GF says drop him

...maybe you should get a second opinion from mummy

Phil_MCR · #22 30.06.2011, 23:47

	Quote:	Marsalforn
	I have a close friend who I have known for years. We often have dinner together, at his place or mine. We both have girlfriends, but neither of us live with them. I invited him to dinner at my place recently, going to great trouble to prepare to make him welcome. However, one day before, he cancelled, saying he had to see his girlfriend that night. I was furious, and still am. He sent me an SMS to apologise after telling me personally, but I didnt answer, as I feel pretty let down. He's a good mate. Do you think I am wrong to be angry? We work in the same bank, but I have now avoided him for 3 days. I dont want to stop being mates with a good friend, football mate, drinking buddy, but I am pretty pissed off. I hate cooking, but went out of my way to get in stuff for a nice evening. My girlfriend says drop him, as you just dont do that to a friend. What do you think?

just tell him why you are pissed off and be done with it. sheesh, the way you're behaving makes me wonder if you're actually a 16 year old school girl.

jacek · #23 30.06.2011, 23:55

Friend in need's a friend indeed - gem of wisdom that always applies both ways and 10/10.

Marsalforn · #24 01.07.2011, 08:37

Thanks to all of you that replied, you have helped me see things clearer, and I shall be following your advice. Some of you could have been kinder in the way you said what you had to say though....No, I am not a 16 year old girl, but sometimes, male or female, I guess we all get hurt by people we associate with occasionally. My mate knows how I hate cooking and entertaining (GF does it when we invite people!!) so I guess it was that that pissed me off the most. Also, its not something I would ever do myself.

No problem though, I'll get over it and invite him out for a beer or three.

Rangatiranui · #25 01.07.2011, 09:05

	Quote:	couta
	yeah... go easy on the guy.. stuff like that happens all the time.... what got me going was: "My girlfriend says drop him, as you just dont do that to a friend"

Bad idea to drop him.

Even if you and he end up marrying your current girlfriends, same-sex friends stay very very important. They often keep you sane.*

*not like i'd profess to know anything about sanity..

Village Idiot · #26 01.07.2011, 09:13

	Quote:	Marsalforn
	Do you think I am wrong to be angry? We work in the same bank, but I have now avoided him for 3 days. I dont want to stop being mates with a good friend, football mate, drinking buddy, but I am pretty pissed off.

How did you ever make it through high school? I think it's time to put on your big-boy pants and HTFU.

summerrain · #27 01.07.2011, 09:25

	Quote:	Marsalforn
	Some of you could have been kinder in the way you said what you had to say though....

Dude, CHILL OUT!!!!!

swedishguy · #28 01.07.2011, 09:38

OMG sounds like you have a proper bromance going on there..

How old are you?

Its never nice when a mates GF goes yoko on youre friendship but it happens..whats important though is that he gives you a good explanation. Unfortunately a lot of men have problems expressing this..

Anyway its not a big deal my friend..hardly new thread worthy if you ask me, im kinda wondring if youre trolling..

i-b-deborah · #29 01.07.2011, 09:38

Did you ever think he cancelled cos he's scared of your man-crush?

	Quote:	Marsalforn
	Thanks to all of you that replied, you have helped me see things clearer, and I shall be following your advice. Some of you could have been kinder in the way you said what you had to say though....No, I am not a 16 year old girl, but sometimes, male or female, I guess we all get hurt by people we associate with occasionally. My mate knows how I hate cooking and entertaining (GF does it when we invite people!!) so I guess it was that that pissed me off the most. Also, its not something I would ever do myself. No problem though, I'll get over it and invite him out for a beer or three.

PaddyG · #30 01.07.2011, 09:41

Fark me, what the hell is EF coming to?
Get over it, eat what you bought, get shitfaced on the booze and forget about it.

bigblue2 · #31 01.07.2011, 09:42

the op is in touch with his feminine side, isn't that what woman say they want? go easy on him .

Else he might cry

summerrain · #32 01.07.2011, 09:43

	Quote:	i-b-deborah
	Did you ever think he cancelled cos he's scared of your man-crush?

jaysus Debs, you are so mean...!

	Quote:	bigblue2
	the op is in touch with his feminine side, isn't that what woman say they want? go easy on him . Else he might cry

Excuse me, some of us females arent even that er....sensitive.

bigblue2 · #33 01.07.2011, 09:45

	Quote:	summerrain
	Excuse me, some of us females arent even that er....sensitive.

then your in touch with your masculine side

lol

PaddyG · #34 01.07.2011, 09:47

	Quote:	bigblue2
	then your in touch with your masculine side lol

or she can be in touch with my masculine side

lost_inbroad · #35 01.07.2011, 09:51

	Quote:	Marsalforn
	I have a close friend who I have known for years. We often have dinner together, at his place or mine. We both have girlfriends, but neither of us live with them. I invited him to dinner at my place recently, going to great trouble to prepare to make him welcome. However, one day before, he cancelled, saying he had to see his girlfriend that night. I was furious, and still am. He sent me an SMS to apologise after telling me personally, but I didnt answer, as I feel pretty let down. He's a good mate. Do you think I am wrong to be angry? We work in the same bank, but I have now avoided him for 3 days. I dont want to stop being mates with a good friend, football mate, drinking buddy, but I am pretty pissed off. I hate cooking, but went out of my way to get in stuff for a nice evening. My girlfriend says drop him, as you just dont do that to a friend. What do you think?

Suck it up princess....let me tell you something I've learned from my travels to distant and foreign lands. Friends are like icecream...when things are cool, everything sticks together...as soon as matters heat up, everything melts apart.

grynch · #36 01.07.2011, 09:53

Remember that wisdom from the ages, ( or was it Forest Gump)
life is like a box of Chocolates, sometimes you get the nuts

Carlos R · #37 01.07.2011, 09:58

	Quote:	grynch
	Remember that wisdom from the ages, ( or was it Forest Gump) life is like a box of Chocolates, sometimes you get the nuts

EF members:

bigblue2 · #38 01.07.2011, 09:59

they are on offer at coop at the moment

yumyum

	Quote:	Carlos R
	EF members:

PaddyG · #39 01.07.2011, 09:59

Or, as some wag said, for Vanessa Phelps, life really is a box of chocolates.

#40 01.07.2011, 10:03

I'm just wondering how the thread would have turned out with the following minor tweaks to the plot...

1) I invited my Swiss colleague to dinner the other night but he didn't show up...

A whole range of "the Swiss" related stereotypical responses at how the Swiss have no social skills and no respect for foreigners' attempts to mix in.

2) I invited my (female) colleague to dinner the other night but she didn't show up...

Jocular questions about the size of the OP's manhood / his cooking skills, and (pah!) women (pah!). Followed by advice like "Ignore her" and "Obviously a stuck up cow".

I think both of these alternatives would have drummed up more EF sympathy. Why not when it's simply a mate that lets you down?