Go Back   English Forum Switzerland > Living in Switzerland > Daily life  
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #41  
Old 17.07.2012, 00:44
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Remember it so well - like you, a foreign mum without family support and a husband working very very long hours, often nights and week-ends. I was so lucky we lived in a house, albeit a semi- with a small garden, and not a flat. Don't beat yourself up about this, very few of us managed to be perfect super-mums! Certainly not me, that's for sure.

But try if you can to get to know your neighbour, and talk about things that could help. Perhaps, say if you know neighbour has a nap between 2 and 3 - you could ensure that kids are out of the house or doing quiet activities at that timel watching TV, or painting, etc. And if there is one room which is more of a problem - then try to avoid that room for noisy activities, or find a carpet for that area. The last thing you need is feeling guilty - or escalating trouble with neighbours.

Could you try and find a group with other mums in your area, to get out of the place, and share. Share the kids, share the guilt (ALL mums feel guilty some of the time!), share solutions, and the joys too.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank for this useful post:
  #42  
Old 17.07.2012, 00:58
Newbie
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Witikon
Posts: 6
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Halohalo has no particular reputation at present
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
Remember it so well - like you, a foreign mum without family support and a husband working very very long hours, often nights and week-ends. I was so lucky we lived in a house, albeit a semi- with a small garden, and not a flat. Don't beat yourself up about this, very few of us managed to be perfect super-mums! Certainly not me, that's for sure.

But try if you can to get to know your neighbour, and talk about things that could help. Perhaps, say if you know neighbour has a nap between 2 and 3 - you could ensure that kids are out of the house or doing quiet activities at that timel watching TV, or painting, etc. And if there is one room which is more of a problem - then try to avoid that room for noisy activities, or find a carpet for that area. The last thing you need is feeling guilty - or escalating trouble with neighbours.

Could you try and find a group with other mums in your area, to get out of the place, and share. Share the kids, share the guilt (ALL mums feel guilty some of the time!), share solutions, and the joys too.

Thanks, I think it is a good idea to check about her nap time. It is hard for me to say where my kids can play as we are living on the top floor above the two units below us. The old lady unit happens to be under where the living, dinning and play area are. And the other end are our bedrooms above another unit. My kids, if they are at home, they spend most of their time at the living room or at the play area.

Actually I am just wondering did the 'crazy' man opposite our apartment instigate her to complain as she never complained of my kids for the past 2.5 years.
Reply With Quote
  #43  
Old 17.07.2012, 01:04
Newbie
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Witikon
Posts: 6
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Halohalo has no particular reputation at present
Re: Fussy Neighbours

And when my kids watch tv, they like to copy the characters on screen, dancing and jumping together with them. They could never sit still on their seats. After watching for a short while, they would either run to the playarea or onto the sofa, and then try to jump down from there. You know, no matter how much i told them not to, they thought it was funny.
I tried giving them some activities to do, and after finish their acitivities, they again happily skipping around. And when time to bring them out, they are also skipping happily.
Anyone has such kind of active kids like me? They are boys!
Reply With Quote
  #44  
Old 17.07.2012, 03:18
poptart's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Boston
Posts: 1,785
Groaned at 33 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 3,013 Times in 1,242 Posts
poptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
In fact, under my window was a kids' playground for a long long time. It is not too convenient if you want to have a nap during the afternoon, but you can get get used to it easily. God, how I missed the sound of happy kids yelling and playing when I moved.

To me, those are the sounds of life.
It's a city and, really, who wants to tiptoe around their apartment all the time in fear of getting the neighbor with an armadillo up their arse all over them if their child decides to run around barefoot during normal waking hours? Of course, I'm the kind of person who sleeps through a fire alarm so...maybe I'm not the usual light sleeper who can't focus during the day when needed and is distracted by flatulent passers-by. (And I also enjoy the sounds of happy kids playing...not so much crying anymore now that I have my own since it seems to demand my attention, even when I try to ignore it but...that's life. ).

Always living in fear of pissing someone off or invoking some sort of legal issue was a serious problem in my 'quality of life' while in Switzerland. Too many people who want to live in a remote alpine village but live in a congested 'bowl' that is Zurich and desperately trying to make fantasy into reality.
Reply With Quote
  #45  
Old 17.07.2012, 03:20
poptart's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Boston
Posts: 1,785
Groaned at 33 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 3,013 Times in 1,242 Posts
poptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
Yeah...but the BIG difference in America is that they will solve the probably easily and just shoot you. You know, in USA guns solve everything...
You read the Enquirer too much. Besides, folks are too poor for guns nowadays and they just eat you zombie style now. Beware the zombie army of silenzzzzzz.
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank poptart for this useful post:
  #46  
Old 17.07.2012, 03:29
poptart's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Boston
Posts: 1,785
Groaned at 33 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 3,013 Times in 1,242 Posts
poptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
Thanks, I think it is a good idea to check about her nap time. It is hard for me to say where my kids can play as we are living on the top floor above the two units below us. The old lady unit happens to be under where the living, dinning and play area are. And the other end are our bedrooms above another unit. My kids, if they are at home, they spend most of their time at the living room or at the play area.

Actually I am just wondering did the 'crazy' man opposite our apartment instigate her to complain as she never complained of my kids for the past 2.5 years.
In the apt we lived in, we were lucky as the lady across the hall was the shit-stirrer in the building; leaving shoes in the hallway/on the stairs, having loud parties and, something even I occasionally noted, wearing heels and clomping around in them on the tile floors which made it sound like a jackhammer was taking down a wall somewhere. I'm sure folks bothered here, but she didn't care and often ranted in very colorful Italian whenever she was yelling at the hauswart. Nobody touched that lady so....I think it depends on the house and who lives there but, honestly, kids are kids and unless you drug them or tie them up, they're going to make noise. Sure, it's a good thing to advise them of being considerate of others in the building but, that doesn't mean they shouldn't be allowed to be active. I don't know what to recommend as the best course but I certainly wouldn't worry if your children are making a normal amount of noise in normal waking hours. I'd confront whomever is complaining and ask them just what they were expecting living in an apartment building (assuming your unit is 3+ bedrooms) without children in a unit that is family-sized....
Reply With Quote
  #47  
Old 17.07.2012, 05:00
Bobbie Jean's Avatar
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Arizona USA
Posts: 72
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 36 Times in 22 Posts
Bobbie Jean has no particular reputation at present
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
Buy some black bin bags (not the official taxed ones). Put your rubbish in it making sure that you remove anything with an address, or receipt or even a bar code. Then borrow a letter from your neighbors' post box and open it. Take it out but don't read it cos you ain't a perv. Screw it up and put it in your prepared rubbish. Then put it out as usual, except late at night.

Note that this revenge is probably illegal and would only work in Switzerland.

When the police visit your neighbours complain afterwards about all the noise.
Genius! Pure genius.

Remind me never to fall afoul of your best side.
Reply With Quote
  #48  
Old 17.07.2012, 19:22
JBZ86's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Zurich and various mountains
Posts: 3,709
Groaned at 520 Times in 337 Posts
Thanked 4,258 Times in 1,944 Posts
JBZ86 has a reputation beyond reputeJBZ86 has a reputation beyond reputeJBZ86 has a reputation beyond reputeJBZ86 has a reputation beyond reputeJBZ86 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
Buy some black bin bags (not the official taxed ones). Put your rubbish in it making sure that you remove anything with an address, or receipt or even a bar code. Then borrow a letter from your neighbors' post box and open it. Take it out but don't read it cos you ain't a perv. Screw it up and put it in your prepared rubbish. Then put it out as usual, except late at night.

Note that this revenge is probably illegal and would only work in Switzerland.

When the police visit your neighbours complain afterwards about all the noise.
Someone did a similar thing like this to me.

I received a letter that I had disposed of waste. Long story short, due cablecom sending many a letter and box etc to my old address repeatedly, new tenants evidently decided to just dump it.

I received a nice big bill and learned all about a case that been ongoing behind the scenes.

Fortunatley, I was able to demonstrate I had already moved at date of said letters and was off the hook.

So, in summary, this is evil, but hey, why not
Reply With Quote
  #49  
Old 17.07.2012, 20:14
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
You read the Enquirer too much. Besides, folks are too poor for guns nowadays and they just eat you zombie style now. Beware the zombie army of silenzzzzzz.
LOL...no you are living in denial. America is the "shoot first-ask later" society. Especially with their "stand your ground law." And that has nothing to do with the Enquirer. You are not in Kansas anymore Dorothy...you are in one of the most violent countries in the world. Some parts on par with Afghanistan and Iraq! Ask some of your soldiers who have gone through tours of duty unscathed and come back to the USA and have been killed and maimed. The Swiss may complain at times but they do not bring a gun with them to solve the issue!
Reply With Quote
  #50  
Old 17.07.2012, 20:29
JamesAG's Avatar
Member
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Schliengen, Germany
Posts: 217
Groaned at 6 Times in 4 Posts
Thanked 302 Times in 120 Posts
JamesAG has an excellent reputationJamesAG has an excellent reputationJamesAG has an excellent reputationJamesAG has an excellent reputation
Re: Fussy Neighbours

While there are some parts of Basel that I wouldn't necessarily want to visit in the middle of the night, overall, Switzerland is a very safe place.

I grew up in the suburbs of Los Angeles in the 1970s and 80s - I left LA at the height of the gang wars at the end of the '80s. At that time, drive-by shootings and carjackings were a daily occurrence in LA, and the rate of homicides was three times higher than it is today.

The USA is much more violent than most other "first-world" countries, there is no doubt about this. The history of the USA was that of pioneers who learned to defend themselves and their property, because there was no police or military forces around to help them. This is very different than the European "world", where the Prussians set up a strong central government and police force. Europeans learned "the state will protect me" while the US was built on a "I have to protect myself" attitude, which is still very much alive today. That's why gun control laws can be enacted easily in Europe while any kind of gun control will cause the US citizens to start violent protests.
Reply With Quote
  #51  
Old 17.07.2012, 20:38
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Fussy Neighbours

I've got one of those mini trampolines- used for exercising without jarring joints. Perhaps one of those would be helpful, as they could take turns bouncing on that - especially with a rug underneath. But should not be used unsupervised- because although it has a 'skirt' all around to protect from springs, a small foot could get caught if they mis-judge.

If you can ask her which room causes the main irritation for her, and the corresponding room above in your apartment- maybe that would help.
Reply With Quote
  #52  
Old 17.07.2012, 21:50
PaddyG's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Pensier, Fribourg
Posts: 9,243
Groaned at 118 Times in 102 Posts
Thanked 16,857 Times in 5,912 Posts
PaddyG has a reputation beyond reputePaddyG has a reputation beyond reputePaddyG has a reputation beyond reputePaddyG has a reputation beyond reputePaddyG has a reputation beyond reputePaddyG has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
Some parts on par with Afghanistan and Iraq!
What, they have suicide bombers and IEDs going off daily?

Reply With Quote
  #53  
Old 18.07.2012, 01:04
Newbie 1st class
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Allschwil
Posts: 13
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 2 Times in 1 Post
yannick4123 has no particular reputation at present
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Swiss people including my gf (pshhhh ) for some reason cant comprehend that other human beings have a right to exist around their apartment
Reply With Quote
  #54  
Old 18.07.2012, 02:27
poptart's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Boston
Posts: 1,785
Groaned at 33 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 3,013 Times in 1,242 Posts
poptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
LOL...no you are living in denial. America is the "shoot first-ask later" society. Especially with their "stand your ground law." And that has nothing to do with the Enquirer. You are not in Kansas anymore Dorothy...you are in one of the most violent countries in the world. Some parts on par with Afghanistan and Iraq! Ask some of your soldiers who have gone through tours of duty unscathed and come back to the USA and have been killed and maimed. The Swiss may complain at times but they do not bring a gun with them to solve the issue!
You don't need a gun to be violent, PJ. Switzerland's tiny population and high rate of domestic violence lead me to think that Switzerland is anything but a serene place on a pedestal...not to mention all the road rage and otherwise angsty folks. That being said, there's nothing like a 'Charter NRA member' decal on your front door (I'm not) and a 160 pound dog to deter crime in the US. I'm not sure where in the US you grew up, but I'm pretty sure it was a lot more of a ghetto than I'm accustomed to living. Everything is the same wherever you go, it's just distributed differently. Your consistent rabid, and mostly inaccurate, anger towards the US also leads me to believe that you have unresolved issues here. Perhaps you should take care of that sometime.
Reply With Quote
  #55  
Old 18.07.2012, 02:30
poptart's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Boston
Posts: 1,785
Groaned at 33 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 3,013 Times in 1,242 Posts
poptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond reputepoptart has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
What, they have suicide bombers and IEDs going off daily?

Well, we did have a tanker roll on 128 early this morning...800 gal of gas on fire. I'm sure the Swiss would have sued the trucking company for the noise (and for needing to be evacuated...)
Reply With Quote
  #56  
Old 19.07.2012, 12:58
Newbie 1st class
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: zentral
Posts: 10
Groaned at 2 Times in 1 Post
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
hdybe has no particular reputation at present
Re: Fussy Neighbours

I can totally relate to OP, I have had similar experience with the OP. It has driven me mad.
Reply With Quote
  #57  
Old 19.07.2012, 16:52
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: CH
Posts: 1,038
Groaned at 244 Times in 117 Posts
Thanked 699 Times in 434 Posts
Bucentaure is considered a nuisanceBucentaure is considered a nuisanceBucentaure is considered a nuisance
Re: Fussy Neighbours

Quote:
View Post
...
Where does it stop?
NO-ONE will prosecute you or evict you for normal family noise during the permitted hours.
Hell yes, and it can be much worse. So attention with that crappy strategy that can make one's life miserable and unbearable.

As somebody suggested before (good advice), you might have some point if we are talking somebody not living next door having a miserable boring life,

but people the apartment downstairs probably don't waste their nerves for no reason telling somebody to calm his kids.
Bad isolation can be one of the major causes for such an impression,

non respect of siesta and night quiet hours request (or disagreement on the amount or placement of those hours) another issue.

I would try to find out how the rumor level in downstairs flat is, if it's due to bad isolation and if carpets and matresses could do the trick (another appoach would be that one to enroll the kids in judo or whatever activity classes so at least for some hours they are exhausted).

I would ask the old lady that hadn't complaint for 2.5 years if she hadn't done so because general rumor level was +- OK (so if she agrees on "turning back" to that level means problem solved) or if she just didn't want to envade her neighbours' space as the OP's kids did, apparently.
Reply With Quote
Reply




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Let's just say; non-Swiss are not that fussy about decor or Feng-Shui... transition Daily life 35 20.04.2011 13:39
Meddlesome neighbours summerrain Complaints corner 68 22.02.2010 15:18
Swiss - a fussy neighbour?? Kupus Complaints corner 15 15.05.2009 15:42
Noisy Neighbours English Beancounter Housing in general 4 02.12.2008 10:41
Nice neighbours (part3 Sh*tty neighbours) HAT Complaints corner 7 06.10.2006 14:15


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 08:09.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0