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  #121  
Old 08.08.2012, 11:48
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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And not only did the OP do all this at work, but he also wrote a long detailed story about it too!

Maybe he should Instagram it as well next time?
While he was still sat on said toilet, contemplating his next course of action.
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  #122  
Old 08.08.2012, 11:50
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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While he was still sat on said toilet, contemplating his next course of action.
Thanks Paddy, should I ever need a spokesperson about the shit I do on a daily basis...I will definitely keep you in mind.
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  #123  
Old 08.08.2012, 11:51
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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While he was still sat on said toilet, contemplating his next course of action.
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  #124  
Old 08.08.2012, 12:00
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Thanks Paddy, should I ever need a spokesperson about the shit I do on a daily basis...I will definitely keep you in mind.
You don't need a spokesperson, you're coping perfectly well as it is.

But, you're welcome nonetheless.
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  #125  
Old 08.08.2012, 12:05
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Re: Toilet issues at work

This thread is very inspirational.

Back in 10 minutes (ehem)....
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  #126  
Old 08.08.2012, 12:06
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Re: Toilet issues at work

Carry on without me, I have to go.

When a (wo)man's gotta go, a (wo)man's gotta go .
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  #127  
Old 08.08.2012, 13:16
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Re: Toilet issues at work

I went out, enjoyed the sun and came back and nothing new on this topic.... I thought someone closed it.

I guess we did the tour of the whole bowl.
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  #128  
Old 08.08.2012, 13:21
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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I went out, enjoyed the sun and came back and nothing new on this topic.... I thought someone closed it.

I guess we did the tour of the whole bowl.

Looks like they may well do
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  #129  
Old 08.08.2012, 13:57
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Totally wrong in all aspects.

Contact with foreign substances help to build up the body's natural defences against that particular substance. I'm not going to go into the scientific evidence in detail, it's easy to look it up.

In actual fact, hospitals are pretty dirty places, the only true aseptic environment is the operating theatre in order to prevent pathogens entering an open wound.
But you're letting the facts get in the way of a good argument.
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  #130  
Old 08.08.2012, 14:00
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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This thread is very inspirational.

Back in 10 minutes (ehem)....
Get a smart phone!
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  #131  
Old 08.08.2012, 14:14
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Get a smart phone!
That would be taking the piss .
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  #132  
Old 08.08.2012, 14:21
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Re: Toilet issues at work

All this immature toilet humour, this shit just ain't funny!!!
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  #133  
Old 08.08.2012, 14:23
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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you mean to say you don't know how to use the 3 seashells?
Hey, Does anybody but me remember this reference from the old Sylvester Stallone film? I think that it was Demolition man with Wesley Snipes? It also starred pre academy award Sandra Bullock.......I've definitely got too much time on my hands.

(movie nerd hangs head in shame )
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  #134  
Old 08.08.2012, 14:41
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Hey, Does anybody but me remember this reference from the old Sylvester Stallone film? I think that it was Demolition man with Wesley Snipes? It also starred pre academy award Sandra Bullock.......I've definitely got too much time on my hands.

(movie nerd hangs head in shame )
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  #135  
Old 08.08.2012, 14:49
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Hey, Does anybody but me remember this reference from the old Sylvester Stallone film? I think that it was Demolition man with Wesley Snipes? It also starred pre academy award Sandra Bullock.......I've definitely got too much time on my hands.

(movie nerd hangs head in shame )
I received a couple of thanks and some rep love from gata, so I'm pleased with the subtle appreciation of my contribution.
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  #136  
Old 08.08.2012, 15:24
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Re: Toilet issues at work

I use to go to the toilet several times during the working time.
Maybe you think I am joking, but I wonder...
Is there any informal restriction about it, in swiss companies?
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  #137  
Old 08.08.2012, 15:27
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Re: Toilet issues at work

Ghost poo
The kind where you feel the poo come out, but there is no poo in the toilet.

Clean poo
The kind where you poo it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper

Wet poo
The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and underwear so you won't ruin them with a stain.

Second Wave poo
This happens when you're done poo-ing and you've pulled up your pants to your knees, and you realize that you have to poo some more.

Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Forehead-poo
The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

Gassy poo
It's so noisy, everyone within earshot is laughing.

Drinker's poo
The kind of poo you have the morning after a long night of drinking. Its most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

Lincoln Log poo
The kind of poo that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush. {ee ee eew}

Corn poo
Self-explanatory.

Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-poo- poo
The kind where you want to poo but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

Spinal Tap poo
That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you would swear it was leaving you sideways.

Wet Cheeks poo (The Power Dump)
The kind that comes out of your butt so fast, your butt gets splashed with water.

Liquid poo
The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out your butt and splashes all over the toilet bowl.

Mexican poo
It smells so bad your nose burns.

The Surprise poo
You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you're about to fart, but oops.a poo!!!

The Dangling poo
This poo refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done poo-ing it. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose!!
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  #138  
Old 08.08.2012, 18:18
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Ghost poo
The kind where you feel the poo come out, but there is no poo in the toilet.

Clean poo
The kind where you poo it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper

Wet poo
The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and underwear so you won't ruin them with a stain.

Second Wave poo
This happens when you're done poo-ing and you've pulled up your pants to your knees, and you realize that you have to poo some more.

Pop-A-Vein-In-Your-Forehead-poo
The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

Gassy poo
It's so noisy, everyone within earshot is laughing.

Drinker's poo
The kind of poo you have the morning after a long night of drinking. Its most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

Lincoln Log poo
The kind of poo that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush. {ee ee eew}

Corn poo
Self-explanatory.

Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-poo- poo
The kind where you want to poo but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

Spinal Tap poo
That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you would swear it was leaving you sideways.

Wet Cheeks poo (The Power Dump)
The kind that comes out of your butt so fast, your butt gets splashed with water.

Liquid poo
The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out your butt and splashes all over the toilet bowl.

Mexican poo
It smells so bad your nose burns.

The Surprise poo
You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you're about to fart, but oops.a poo!!!

The Dangling poo
This poo refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done poo-ing it. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose!!

Yep, think I've experienced all those at some time or another.
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  #139  
Old 09.08.2012, 14:34
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Re: Toilet issues at work

Hey LiB,

I just wondered today (don't ask me where ) -- have you ever thought about who, or what, touched the toilet paper you use for your doughnuts?

You might want to get rid of a few rounds before using them, or maybe cut around the wet spots.
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  #140  
Old 09.08.2012, 14:39
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Re: Toilet issues at work

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Hey LiB,

I just wondered today (don't ask me where ) -- have you ever thought about who, or what, touched the toilet paper you use for your doughnuts?

You might want to get rid of a few rounds before using them, or maybe cut around the wet spots.
Why did you mention that? He most possibly will start to produce his own toilet paper tomorrow. You know how to drive somebody crazy, don't you
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