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  #21  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:09
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

I don't mean to offend by saying he is uneducated. what I really should just say is that more than anything else, he looked aggressive and not like someone who wanted to talk it out. My friend wanted to solve the situation and tell him exactly what happened. the guy said he dint want o hear what he had to say. when my friend asked, "do you really know what happened?" the guy said "you think my wife is lying?". when my friend said, "can we just resolve this in a normal manner, he started racially insulting BOTH of us to get a rise out of him. Most people who are slightly intelligent can at least make some valid arguements. This guy just kept shouting at him in German " you are stupid, you are an ass**le." and giving no valid reason of why he was there, what my friend had done...nadda.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:14
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Exactly. You are looking at it from the point of view of a woman. For us, we have a set-to, threaten all sorts of stuff, plot revenge for weeks, discuss it ad nauseum with our friends, cry over it, stare and hiss at the person as we pass them in the street then eventually delete them from Facebook and never speak to them again.

As a chap, they have a one-off barney in a bar, maybe a bit of a scuffle then a week later it's forgotten.
Talk about generalizing

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You have said the guy looked uneducated in two different posts. What does this have to do with anything? How can you make this assumption? What is uneductated? I didnt go to university, I dont have a degree or masters, I didnt stay on at school beyond 16 to even do a-levels? Am I uneducated and thus inferior or prone to aggression and assaults?
No Jordan you are just prone to being a smoking diva
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  #23  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:20
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

honestly i can't speak for the op but i've understood 'uneducated' not to mean an actual academic education but more in a way of learning how to behave with others. in spanish we would call someone maleducado or uneducated if they are rude, disrespectful or don't know how to behave with others.

some of the most educated people i know can also be the most uneducated, in this sense.

anyway, back on topic. honestly, racial comments and threats? i would report it to the police- did no one else at the cafe get involved or stand up to your friend? and your friend's boss or the owner of the cafe? i wouldn't let someone treat me like that and it seems that the cafe owner should be involved at that point. good luck,
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:22
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

If the guy threatened violence at the time and also threatened violence in the future then surely this is a matter for the police.

I would go into your local police station with your friend and your evidence and let them decide how to proceed. At the very least it will be recorded. And if he does this regularly the police might already have a list of complaints from others and they will act.

Also, if your video was taken on a public street then I don't think he has any grounds for complaint about that. No idea if it affects it's status as evidence, but you can certainly post it on Youtube

Seems to me like this bully has been allowed to get away with this behaviour for too long.

Last edited by DanLF; 30.08.2012 at 13:28.
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  #25  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:25
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

Gummy your caring attitude towards you friend touched my heart.

There are lot of people in this world with whom logic won't work. So best to ignore them if possible. Maybe report it to the police in case the thug ends up doing something more stupid.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:25
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

Avoiding a repeat of the circumstances is your only way to move on here. There are thugs the world over, no need to have to justify your actions/inactions. The more you live, the wiser you'll become and learn to get streetwise and read people and avoid clashes.

Sorry for what happened to you and your friend.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:26
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

Amaraya- you took my thoughts exactly..I didnt mean "educated" as in an actual degree...I meant more on the lines of not knowing how to behave and to respect others.

As for Youtube...is there any law about posting such a video? and especially from Switzerland?
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:28
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Exactly. You are looking at it from the point of view of a woman. For us, we have a set-to, threaten all sorts of stuff, plot revenge for weeks, discuss it ad nauseum with our friends, cry over it, stare and hiss at the person as we pass them in the street then eventually delete them from Facebook and never speak to them again.

As a chap, they have a one-off barney in a bar, maybe a bit of a scuffle then a week later it's forgotten.
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Talk about generalizing
Well, it was intended as tongue-in-cheek to this point here.

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To be honest, as I am not a man...I dont know how this whole male ego/fighting thing goes...but as a woman bystander, it terrified me.
But I guess I made it a bit too... umm.. subtle.
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  #29  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:28
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Talk about generalizing

No Jordan you are just prone to being a smoking diva
I would say quite the opposite, surely the anti's are the divas. I just try to educate
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  #30  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:29
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Avoiding a repeat of the circumstances is your only way to move on here. There are thugs the world over, no need to have to justify your actions/inactions. The more you live, the wiser you'll become and learn to get streetwise and read people and avoid clashes.

Sorry for what happened to you and your friend.
i'm not sure being street wise is always avoiding clashes, or better yet letting others get away with that kind of behavior. i've been street wise since forever and sometimes you have to call someone out on being an a*******. being streetwise is more knowing when you are safe to call them out yourself and knowing when someone like the police need to be involved, likewise knowing when to do nothing. in a case including threats of violence i don't think doing nothing is an option-
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:32
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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As for Youtube...is there any law about posting such a video? and especially from Switzerland?
First post some stills from the video here. If the guy sees you posted the video on Youtube he might go crazy.
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  #32  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:34
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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First post some stills from the video here. If the guy sees you posted the video on Youtube he might go crazy.
absolutely! and it won't really do anything to help the situation anyway. humiliation, i'm thinking, wouldn't make this loco more peaceful
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  #33  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:34
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

Well, my friend is a local, so posting some stills here will have no effect. I would love to show him what an arse he is on youtube...but I also dont want to break the law.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:36
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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i'm not sure being street wise is always avoiding clashes, or better yet letting others get away with that kind of behavior. i've been street wise since forever and sometimes you have to call someone out on being an a*******. being streetwise is more knowing when you are safe to call them out yourself and knowing when someone like the police need to be involved, likewise knowing when to do nothing. in a case including threats of violence i don't think doing nothing is an option-
The police won't be there quick enough to settle a dispute as was posted. It's there and then, you either know that you can handle the assailant physically or you plan an exit, there is no other practical option. You only lose if you escalate a situation, even if you're in the right. It's about not being physically assaulted or actually harmed that is your goal, being called an asshole may not be pleasant, but you won't need a blood transfusion to get over it.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:36
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Well, my friend is a local, so posting some stills here will have no effect. I would love to show him what an arse he is on youtube...but I also dont want to break the law.
You are not breaking any law if you filmed it in a public space.
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  #36  
Old 30.08.2012, 11:38
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Well, my friend is a local, so posting some stills here will have no effect. I would love to show him what an arse he is on youtube...but I also dont want to break the law.
Make and Event inviting EF members to come have a look and that way you don't need to upload anything!
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:39
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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honestly i can't speak for the op but i've understood 'uneducated' not to mean an actual academic education but more in a way of learning how to behave with others. in spanish we would call someone maleducado or uneducated if they are rude, disrespectful or don't know how to behave with others.

some of the most educated people i know can also be the most uneducated, in this sense.

anyway, back on topic. honestly, racial comments and threats? i would report it to the police- did no one else at the cafe get involved or stand up to your friend? and your friend's boss or the owner of the cafe? i wouldn't let someone treat me like that and it seems that the cafe owner should be involved at that point. good luck,
This again goes back to cultural differences.

For example, the behaviour of the people here that a lot of expats pick up on with the rudeness/courtesy/disrespect etc would get people regularly verbally abused or put on their backside in London. It just would not be tolerated and you would soon learn to shape up or find you are getting shouted at and hit alot.

But the Swiss, despite their actions in coming across this way, will rarely get in a confrontation. Its normal for them to just treat people this way be it deemed unpolite here or not.

Thus, I dont see it as uneducated or particularly right or wrong to confront someone and say I am not taking this crap. Yes it can lead to violence, but more often than not, the personn being called out knows they have done wrong or come across a certain way that another will not tolerate, learns from it, and realises some people in this world will not tolerate you being a complete prick, whether you realise it or not.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:42
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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The police won't be there quick enough to settle a dispute as was posted. It's there and then, you either know that you can handle the assailant physically or you plan an exit, there is no other practical option. You only lose if you escalate a situation, even if you're in the right. It's about not being physically assaulted or actually harmed that is your goal, being called an asshole may not be pleasant, but you won't need a blood transfusion to get over it.
i don't meaning calling the police during the dispute. but if there is video showing the threats and aggression, then this is what should be brought to the police. of course he can't respond to the guy in the first place, it's his place of work and there are others around (p.s did nobody else do anything?). my point is not to escalate this situation, but that i don't think in this case it is a matter of being streetwise- more of being protective and avoiding conflict. it's not as if the victim was walking down the street and it was random, but with the loco knowing where he works, when and all the details, i'm not sure that just continuing to work and not pay attention is a good solution either, it's quite an easy target then, no? for that reason i recommended the police as a buffer to avoid further problems, as it sounds inevitable as there would be-
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:48
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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This again goes back to cultural differences.

For example, the behaviour of the people here that a lot of expats pick up on with the rudeness/courtesy/disrespect etc would get people regularly verbally abused or put on their backside in London. It just would not be tolerated and you would soon learn to shape up or find you are getting shouted at and hit alot.

But the Swiss, despite their actions in coming across this way, will rarely get in a confrontation. Its normal for them to just treat people this way be it deemed unpolite here or not.

Thus, I dont see it as uneducated or particularly right or wrong to confront someone and say I am not taking this crap. Yes it can lead to violence, but more often than not, the personn being called out knows they have done wrong or come across a certain way that another will not tolerate, learns from it, and realises some people in this world will not tolerate you being a complete prick, whether you realise it or not.
very true but i don't mean to say that uneducated is to confront someone when being an ass. actually it's the contrary. uneducated to mean that someone is acting out of line. calling someone out on their behavior is commendable in many situations but uneducated is more pushing old ladies out of the way, not holding the door open for others, calling people racially charged names, etc. just to explain what i mean.
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Old 30.08.2012, 11:49
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Re: Witness of threat and almost violence

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Who said Anything about Alcohol being involved??? Why people assume all arguments are fueled by alcohol is beyond me! Because no one fights without it right??

Before assuming it was Alcohol, why not read the thread properly first before jumping to conclusions.

You missed a tiny word that makes a bit of difference in what I said:

IF

I said, IF alcohol was involved.
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