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Old 13.07.2017, 13:32
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Don't you have a house for your rubbish? Forcing those bags to be out in all kinds of weather should be fined.

Here is mine, it houses two.
I wish I did have a wheelie bin, it would make life so much simpler but alas I need to leave the bags on the pavement after 7am on collection day.
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Old 13.07.2017, 13:57
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Not really surprising.

1) galavanting about without lingerie.

2) Fans/open windows causing drafts.

If you'd just worn a scarf you would be fine, now you've gone and kilted yourself.
I bought a scarf, actually. And I was buying PJs - nothing exciting.

I'm self medicating with cherry coke and wotsits.
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Old 13.07.2017, 14:22
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

I once ordered a baby chicken in a Vietnamese restaurant and it came with the head still attached.

Where do these people think they are, Vietnam?
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  #3144  
Old 13.07.2017, 14:25
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

Due to the fitter having food poisoning, I have to wait an extra day for my new oven...
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  #3145  
Old 13.07.2017, 14:44
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Every 2017 delivery from Nespresso the capsules are all banged up. What would Clooney do about this?
You are talking about the worse Batman ever... dont expect much
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  #3146  
Old 13.07.2017, 19:20
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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You are talking about the worse Batman ever... dont expect much
Ah, the capsules being batted is part of the advertising stragedy then?
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  #3147  
Old 13.07.2017, 19:33
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Due to the fitter having food poisoning, I have to wait an extra day for my new oven...
Why on earth did you poison him before the job was completed? Plain old feminine malevolence, or did he fail to wipe his feet on the doormat as he carried the oven in?
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  #3148  
Old 13.07.2017, 20:09
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Why on earth did you poison him before the job was completed? Plain old feminine malevolence, or did he fail to wipe his feet on the doormat as he carried the oven in?
Oi! Nope - he apparently was poisoned on Monday - nothing to do with me. The oven is not in my house...

I have a toddler, a labrador and a large husband. And we live in the countryside. The wiping of the feet is generally a tertiary consideration at best!
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Old 13.07.2017, 20:18
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Oi! Nope - he apparently was poisoned on Monday - nothing to do with me. The oven is not in my house...

I have a toddler, a labrador and a large husband. And we live in the countryside. The wiping of the feet is generally a tertiary consideration at best!
So.. you poisoned him before he even arrived at your house. Presumably for having installed an oven in some other house.

Never mind your claims of tolerance with respect to his usage of your doormat, you've tried to murder the poor man!

Come come madam, confess and hope for leniency from the court.
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  #3150  
Old 13.07.2017, 20:32
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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So.. you poisoned him before he even arrived at your house. Presumably for having installed an oven in some other house.

Never mind your claims of tolerance with respect to his usage of your doormat, you've tried to murder the poor man!

Come come madam, confess and hope for leniency from the court.
With the Power Of My Mind?

Hardly. I'm crocheting a garter for my friend's wedding. Not got time for telekinetic homicide. He's coming tomorrow - failing that the Stunt Installer (i.e the bloke from the front office who still has all his paperwork up to date just in case) will be stepping in.

Have you been watching Ironside re-runs? Or have the exhaust fumes crept under the stovepipe brim?
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Old 13.07.2017, 20:38
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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Have you been watching Ironside re-runs? Or have the exhaust fumes crept under the stovepipe brim?
I've been feeling a bit light headed since I dipped my feet in RTV Silicone, but that is probably just the acietic acid smell. It's not much stronger than Salt and Vinegar crisps, but the sensory input of crisps on Thursday may have thrown my finely tuned neurology a bit (more) off.
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Old 13.07.2017, 22:08
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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I've been feeling a bit light headed since I dipped my feet in RTV Silicone, but that is probably just the acietic acid smell. It's not much stronger than Salt and Vinegar crisps, but the sensory input of crisps on Thursday may have thrown my finely tuned neurology a bit (more) off.

You need to balance the salt and vinegar with artificial cheese flavourings.
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  #3153  
Old 14.07.2017, 14:44
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

The was cold in the fridge.
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  #3154  
Old 14.07.2017, 15:13
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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The was cold in the fridge.
?
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  #3155  
Old 14.07.2017, 18:13
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

It goes without saying, if it's cold don't stick it in the fridge.

I have just given myself a sneezing attack from mosquito repellent spray which is basically my summer perfume.
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Old 14.07.2017, 20:27
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

I don't think I have any clean white socks to play tennis on Sunday
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  #3157  
Old 14.07.2017, 20:28
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

Drove my other car today for a change and almost forgot it had no parking sensor!
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Old 15.07.2017, 01:48
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

I was feeling so low just now that I opened a packet of peanut saturated Flips, in the hope of reliving cheese Wotsits. It can only be downhill from now, and I feel completely disgusted with myself.
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Old 15.07.2017, 08:32
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

My nose was cold last night. Camping at 8 degrees, I think my bikini stays packed this trip.
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Old 15.07.2017, 08:41
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Re: The First World Problem Thread

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I was feeling so low just now that I opened a packet of peanut saturated Flips, in the hope of reliving cheese Wotsits. It can only be downhill from now, and I feel completely disgusted with myself.
Even when things are going well, Peanut Flips just make them worse. If you start at a low and add Flips then you'll need some form of antidote. I suggest a crisp butty with butter and Salt and Vinegar crisps, followed by a couple of Mars bars or a Magnum or three.

Once your system has passed the toxins from the flips you'll be fine. Maltesers may speed the process somewhat
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