Part 1

I am a native swiss guy, I grew up here and I am living here for a bit more than 20 years. Given the fact that people from my country are often seen as weird and I have been reading a lot of that stuff recently across the net, I have decided to join this nice community and share my opinions and experiences with the people of my country and my impressions.

English is not my native language, so please forgive me my syntax and sometimes strange ways of expressing myself.

Living here for around 20 years, I still feel like a stranger in my own country, despite being a more or less true swiss. Mostly of french swiss descendants, but also elements from France and Italy are included.
I am living in the german part of Switzerland for mostly involuntary purposes(work, school etc.), but mostly due to me parents coming here for work from the french part. I did all my school stuff here, speak the local swiss german dialect without issues, but also speak accent free french(which is my main language spoken at home and with parents).

As I said I am a real swiss guy, and essentially have everything to be considered as one - still I have failed to understand my own people and I find them odd and weird(even my own parents, despite them saying such things quite often too lol).

But with the years I have understood and did some research and I have realized quite a few things that could be useful for new people coming to Switzerland and/or help swiss guys that are in the situation like myself.


The definition of a swiss girl:

Swiss girls aren’t a matter of nationality, but it all comes down assimilation and integration. Regardless of where you come from. If you live here for longer than 8 or 10 years and are familiar with the habits and how the swiss country works, including speaking the local dialect/or at least speaking some good french/german or italian and are behaving like all the swiss people( it comes automatically if you’re willing to assimilate and integrate) - you can be considered a swiss person, or in this case a swiss girl.

Speaking of swiss girls - they can come from the three main parts of Switzerland, each part has their own language as you know. They might be different in terms of language and origins, but their behavior and attitude is exactly the same.

Girls from the french speaking part and italian speaking part might be a little bit opener and smile more often, but essentially they aren’t much more different than those from the german speaking part. French speaking swiss girls have often descendants from the german speaking part(judging by their last names) and or/their families live in that part for a long time - so they still have the swiss mentality.
Girls from the german speaking part can also have origins from the french or italian speaking part - but that doesn’t change anything regarding their behavior.

While most girls from the italian speaking part are of italian descent, they also have the swiss mentality because they were born and risen there and Ticino has been a part of Switzerland for long enough to follow it. Ironically people from Ticino don’t seem to like italian people - so they can be considered as one of the most xenophobic parts of Switzerland(right before the swiss germans, especially from central Switzerland).

So wherever you go and whoever you talk to - you’ll encounter the same narrow minded mentality and ignorance.

Social behavior of swiss girls

Swiss girls are considered to be the most difficult, most controversial and most ignorant women on this planet. Myself, as a native, I can confirm that. Once they’re assimilated they become like that - and I am talking about women of all social classes and all ages.

Swiss girls think they’re the best on this planet, the most beautiful and most attractive women who have ever lived, and their behavior clearly shows it. The majority of inhabitants in Switzerland are quite wealthy, there are only a few who are extremely rich - but the majority of people have more than enough money, even those with less paid jobs - because the salaries are just so damn high in this country. Just look right and left, see the perfect roads, expensive houses and cars and high end shops everywhere. Made in Switzerland is still something that stands for extra quality!

So they grow up in a world where everything is handed to them on a silver platter. Nearly all girls have a lot of expensive hobbies, such as horses, shopping trips around Europe, shopping every day in the cities, the gym, their own car, sometimes their own flat when they turn 18. The seem to spend money everyday and their parents offer them what they want. The majority of swiss girls are princesses - and they wanna be treated like that. All that paired with an ignorant and arrogant behavior. The go on expensive vacations 4 times a year - everything has to be expensive and exclusive. Just look at some of their social media accounts - they’re proud to show off their well being.

Swiss girls come across as rude, ignorant and arrogant, but also shy, reserved and prude sometimes.
When they go on an overseas trip they usually do a lot more stupid stuff - because they will leave it there and their reputation isn’t in danger. Swiss girls like to hang around with girls a lot - and some make out with them. The way they talk to each other is horrible, describing themselves as close sisters, giving compliments to each other and even doing some dirty talk lol. Their social media accounts are infested with comments from their female friends - they need every second a compliment giving them the confirmation that they’re the best on this planet. But careful: Compliments from strangers are a harassment to them - compliments can only be given within the social circle.

The nightlife in Switzerland is one of the most difficult to understand in the whole world. While in other countries nightlife mostly serves to get to know other girls and or talk to them, nightlife in Switzerland is something completely different.

There’s next to no nightlife during the week, because Swiss people need to work hard to cope with the rising expenses. There will be some occasionally clubbing on Thursdays(mostly for students) or going to a bar until 11 PM during the week to drink a beer and chat with your social circle. That’s it. During the weekend and on Fridays, most swiss girls wanna break out of their normality. They wanna get wasted - but still look good and keep their reputation.

Reputation is a key word in Switzerland. It all comes down to reputation, at work and in your free time. So if you have a bad reputation and/or your charisma is very bad - you will have a hard time in this country. Girls know that, and so they pay extremely attention to what they do and don’t do - just to have a good reputation in the world and especially in their social circle.

Swiss girls have the ability to spot men easily who only want an adventure and nothing serious. They must be the best in the world at it, because according to several statements those things are impossible in CH.
Men who have the reputation of only being interested in fast action won’t be looked at in CH and disowned all the time. You’re likely to go down in the hierarchy of your social circle. It’s also strictly forbidden to start relationships with ex-girlfriends of close friends within your social circle - apparently that can lead to very serious problems and your reputation will go downhills.

Clubbing in Switzerland is just having fun within your social circle, get wasted and do silly things. NOT to meet new people. Girls often come with groups of friends, their social circle and their clique. They have no interest in other men when they go out. They just wanna have a good time and enjoy themselves - be aware of that. If you’re not part of a group, or social circle, or clique - you won’t have a good time in any club or bar. If you approach girls in swiss clubs, they will mostly either ignore you , tell you they’re taken or walk away. If you insist, they will most likely go to one of their male friends in their social circle and he will take care of the issue and basically tell you to off and leave their women alone.

This goes for all parts of Switzerland - their mentality is the same everywhere.

So again: Clubbing in Switzerland and talking to random girls in bars to get to know them better or find new friends in clubs and bars is essentially impossible in this country - which makes it quite unique in the world.

Oh - and ONS and more of the like are impossible here too. Girls and men watch their reputation a lot - they prefer visiting a hooker instead(which isn’t quite good, but at least their need is solved lol).

So don’t waste your time to get to know new girls at night or in nightlife! It’s a virtual and physical impossibility!



The social circle - the key to get to know girls(if you manage to enter that secret club).

Social circles in Switzerland are unique in this world. They basically come down to a cult. You get to see groups of people calling their social circle even „their family“ - so see how far it goes. The older you get, the more difficult it gets to establish a social circle. Basically after 30 it’s impossible to start from 0 - you gotta know where you stand, who you wanna meet at that time. Loneliness is a big issue in this country and lots of people suffer from depression - because they’re alone. There are a lot of psychiatric institutes in this country and even more psychiatrists - you can guess why!

Social circles start in preschool. People get to know each other - then some of them leave but there will always be a person who will go with you to primary school - so that’s the first step - somebody has been around you for more than 3 years! You’ll meet new people in primary school , then again some of them leave and others will follow you to secondary school. After school - you can choose to go to high school or do an apprenticeship - where again you’ll meet new people but also have acquaintances from earlier schools who will remember you and approach you! The loose social circle of girls and guys is built!

Of course during those school days, most swiss guys will get to know and approach girls, which are quite easy in school - but extremely picky! That goes all the way up till they finish high school!

All couplings and relationships and sexual experiences happen within their social circle during their free time and at school! None of them happen in clubs or somewhere where they enjoy themselves - keep that in mind. Hookups are unknown here and it also comes down the social network they’re frequenting.

Sexual education starts early in Switzerland, and if you don’t start to interact with girls very early here - you’re done for your life. I personally had never a relationship with a woman, because I have been rejected during my school times, suffered from occasional bullying and still have my V-card. Girls will develop fast and guys usually make their experiences quite early and quickly here. I somehow failed going through that time and when I finished high school - it was already too late.

So essentially I have no social circle(I had a fake one during high school, just because people pretended to be friends but turned out to be total assholes), and 0 experience with girls.

I have arranged myself and I essentially don’t need all that stuff in my life. I just don’t wanna watch people do the same mistakes as I did.

After high school when people work or study - they don’t make new friends. They will basically stay with all their acquaintances from school and preschool for their life. By the time swiss girls have a huge social circe of several hundreds of people - it’s easy going from there for them.

Keep in mind: If you didn’t socialize with people during school and are not a local from Switzerland with lots of acquaintances - you won’t be part of a social circle and therefor will have no access to swiss girls. Reputation is important in a social circle - so that’s why people are careful.

Swiss girls are extremely cautious and distrust everybody who isn’t from their place. People with no social circle will be ignored. Don’t forget that CH is a small country, a lot of people know each other and the cities are more likely to be big villages. While social circles in cities are more diverse and subcultural - in rural areas it’s just horrible. Often there’s only one social circle within younger people, with hundreds of people.
So even as a swiss person from another place you won’t have access to those social circles - if you’re not a local. They might give you the opportunity to present yourself and hang out a bit, but you didn’t know them for 15 years or longer - so they’ll keep you at distance and away from the girls. Social circles in Switzerland are a bit like those motorcycle gangs - you’re basically a „Hangaround“ at best if you’re not from the place.

So again: If you’re new in town - don’t bother to enter those social circles, because you will never be accepted as one them. It’s not worth the humiliation.

People will tell you to join local sports clubs or other clubs in general to get enrolled in the local community - this is only correct to a certain extend. You might be seen as a valuable player, or good member of the team - but you will never be accepted to be one them - and you won’t have access to all the activities that happen outside of the clubs, such as going out together or talking to the girls that are in that group. When you’re working for the club, or a good player or whatever they see you as somebody that belongs to them, you’re useful to them in fact. But everything that goes beyond those activities - they will let you feel it, you’re not one of them and never will be!

Also girls in social circles tend to have a lot of guy-friends, so basically guys they went to school with and did some stuff in the past. Usually they fall in love with one of them - so your chances if you’re new in town are pretty much 0. Only go for the girls who are in your social circle, is the rule number 1 here in CH, and if you don’t have a social circle, even as a local swiss guy, you won’t get near a girl anywhere, anytime.

So if you’re moving to CH, make sure to have social circles in advance, or bring a partner from your place you met there. Switzerland isn’t a place for small talk, casual flirts, compliments and easy going pick up/chat up women. Even men who had success in all other countries you could imagine - didn’t get near any swiss girls.

Us swiss guys have a tough life lol - but we gotta cope with it and honestly living without a woman on your side of any experience with women isn’t that bad. The problem will mostly be the fertility rate, which is quite low and that there will be too many women in the end. HAHA!!


The high divorce rate and women who think they’re still good at 46

CH has one of the highest divorce rates in Europe, which is nearly 50%. How comes that? Well people in CH aren’t happily married. It’s mostly because they have to, mostly to keep things within the family. Divorced people are still stigmatized in central CH and conservative places these days - so it makes sense. There's also lots of single women in CH, mostly because they failed within their social circle or they moved away from the place. There’s a high percentage of women having kids very late - which means between 35 and 40. CH women seem to be very fertile till very late - some even have healthy kids at 44 or older. So it’s not surprising if you see women marry only at 40 and have kids on or two years later - and then divorce lol. But they got what they wanted - which is children and the poor men can pay for nearly the rest of their lives.
A main reason why CH has one of the lowest birth rates.

There’s surprisingly few women who have children between 25 and 34, mostly because they’re occupied with their own careers or they feel too young to be a mother lol. In CH there exist two types:
One type has a first child very young, between 15 and 24. Those cases are mostly damned for life, because they either don’t have enough savings, need to live with their parents and of course can’t continue their work and studies. Their partners often break up with them and they’re left alone and stigmatized for life. Those partners are always part of their social circles.

Then there’s the women who have worked hard for a long time of their life, made some decent money and have some excellent careers and academic grades. Now they just get to look around a bit in their social circles for a similar partner for the sole purpose to have a child and break up then because they can’t stand their beta male behavior - but they want their money lol. If a woman has no social life at that time they can also go to a sperm bank and do it that way.

Women in CH think they’re the best till a quite advanced age. Women at 40 still think they’re excellent wife material and that they will have a life like at 20 - while in other countries women are disillusioned. But that quickly changes at 50 when the majority of them will directly fall into a midlife crisis - and most of them will suffer from psychiatric problems. At lot of swiss girls are already very mental at a young age, having a skewed view of the world and especially of men.

So yes, most CH women are mentally challenged here, regardless of their age - that’s why so many swiss men are either alone or go overseas to meet women from other countries. Even in Austria and Germany the chances are excellent. Every other place on the earth is better to seek and meet women - but CH is just absolutely horrible - and that’s coming from a native local who knows how the country works!

At an early age but especially when you’re older your social circle is also useful for all sorts of corruption and nepotism. If you know the right people it will help you to pursue your career or place your money - that’s why the CH people love their „Apéro“ lol.

Part 2 follows below

Part 2

What swiss girls really want and what kind of men they seek:

Compared to other countries there aren’t that many 10’s in CH. Most swiss girls are around 5 and 8 at best - some are even 4 or lower. All they seek for are men which are 8 minimum and ideal 10’s.
Younger women tend to like 9’s and 10’s - as they grow older and the urge to have kids(if they don’t already have one) takes over, they will also go for the beta 4 to 7 guys who have a good career and some cash but look so hyper correct and clean - that i’’s almost frightening. Usually those relationships don’t last long as explained above.

So if you’re not a 8 to 10 in your social circle - girls won’t even look at you, especially at a younger age(under 34). To be in the inner circle of a social circle - you gotta have some qualities - that place is usually reserved to those who are at least an 8 if not higher. Swiss girls always have more power than men! They always had and it will always be like that. They can be 5 at best - but they gotta get the 10’s or their reputation will be damaged. Swiss girls have a sense of entitlement that I have never seen anywhere else on the world(keep in mind that swiss people are generally rich and don’t need money). They act like they’re a princess in most cases. A man can keep offering drinks and such to a swiss girl - but she doesn’t mind that gesture because most girls have more than enough money of themselves. There were even girls telling men to off when they wanted to pay the bills, or at least a part of it, and they stated that they weren’t in need of any money from them.

So yes, swiss girls don’t appreciate anything. Money, nice men who help them and listen to them, men who can do the household and cook and more of the like aren’t the key on here - most of them will go by the looks and work on their reputation if they’re seen with a 10 guy!

Swiss men are generally not bad looking, at least those who I have seen being in a couple. Their girlfriends weren’t that bad either, but certainly not 10’s. There’s no essential busted guy, there are guys who could do more of themselves, but essentially if a girl takes care of them they will turn to 8 or 9’s. Guys who don’t have the looks swiss girls seek are quickly thrown out of the window and are not interesting for any swiss women or girl. Most men will look in nearby countries or overseas - sometimes they succeed. It starts quite early at school, where girls start to choose and categorize men. There are men they only wanna be friends with, usually 5 to 7, and then there are the perfect men 8 to 10 - that’s what they’re seeking for. In my school days I was a perfect 4 - so absolutely not interesting for any girl!

Most swiss girls ideally want a sporty, muscular man and he should be extremely good looking and a bit on the metro side, taking almost too much care of himself - while the girls are often average. So the standards in CH for men are insane - and it’s not worth the effort if you could get girls easier in other countries with less efforts. A lot, and I mean a lot of swiss girls have a crush for boybands and male singers(aka Justin Bieber in their teens) and more appropriate singers when they grow older. And they want all boys to look like them or at least come close to them. If you don’t look like one of those you have one point less.

But what nearly all swiss girls want, and that’s what boils it down to the infamous social circles, is reputation!
Reputation is a magic word in CH as said before. Reputation is everything here - if your reputation is bad you can prepare yourself to leave the country, because nobody is gonna give you a job anymore or help you!
People who have ed up in CH can’t come back, even the local natives. CH people have a tendency to be cold and harsh, a bit less in the latin parts, but still present.

Keep in mind, the country is extremely small, cities are like big villages and a lot of people know each other. So even by changing the area, your past will always be present and swiss people rarely forget things, especially if they’re bad. Swiss girls are the worst though, they are mistresses at keeping everything in their mind about former incidents and will approach you or others and tell them your mistakes over and over again. They can’t just forget stuff. Even mistakes that are as old as 20 years or more - they won’t forget them. Like if you insulted a person once at school - they will come up to you and tell you that 20 years later.
Don’t up in CH and watch your reputation - because this is the essential key on here!

So if a guy has an excellent reputation in his social circle and in life generally, the looks match and he perhaps has got some good cashflow in his pocket and even better his own car and flat, lots of friends, no social issues and all the things mentioned in the above text - there’s essentially no issues to get near a swiss girl.


But as a random tourist who stays two weeks in CH and wants an adventure with a swiss girl, or a guy who doesn’t have the things mentioned above - swiss girls will always be untouchable and unreachable. Most encouraged by their parents who aren’t better than their children and have risen them like that.
The whole system in CH is outdated and a lot of swiss men have become workaholics or have left the country for good - because of the issues mentioned above.

Steps how to avoid issues with swiss girls(based on my own mistakes). Serves for future generations:

- If you’re not a good looking person who is at least a 7 to 10 - you won’t have any success with swiss girls -ever! So if you’re not estimated as such a person by the „others“ - your game is pretty much over!

- Build up your social circle as soon as possible, as it will stay with your during your entire life. Socialize with people as soon as possible, build your circle with caution and choose carefully your future friends. It will become more and more difficult the older you get and the closer you will finish school.
If you don’t have a solid social circle before you turned 20 it’s pretty much over.

- Make sure not to be the shy guy when you got the chance to be in a social circle. Swiss girls don’t like them for some reason. Fortunately most swiss guys aren’t like that - but you can also learn how to act like that just by observing the others at early age and imitating them.

Build up a solid reputation within your social circle and keep defending it. Make sure not to up - your reputation shouldn’t be damaged in any way. Swiss girls love reputation and they totally rely on it - for themselves as well as for their potential partners.

- Don’t be the nice guy. Swiss girls like interesting guys with a good reputation within their social circle and some decent status overall. Do that - and they will instantly like you!



So the conclusion is:

If you wanna come to Switzerland for work purposes(with excellent career chances and good salaries(given the high prices here lol)), to study or do some training at one of our famous enterprises, schools or universities, to visit the beautiful landscape, the lakes, the mountains or just to live in a stable country with a more or less good economic future - then you’re welcome. If you’re coming here and already have a family of your own, already have acquaintances and exactly know what you wanna do and have everything planned a long time ahead - then you’re welcome. You won’t have too many issues - because you will be with people that are like you and your future is secured.

But if you’re coming to Switzerland without having a plan and for the sole purpose of meeting, picking up and/or talk to girls/women, be friends with (swiss) people who live here for a long time and are not part of a community(like the english communities etc.) - you’ll have an extremely hard time and it’s not recommended to come here if thats your intention. You won’t get access to their social circles and they will never accept you as one of their own. The people of Switzerland(also those who are assimilated) have a village mentality and are extremely narrow minded - even towards people from other parts of the country, sometimes even from other cantons. (Zurich and Basle don’t like each other for example). They can be quite brutal in terms of ignoring and excluding you.

Don’t make those mistakes

Thanks for listening

Fork me, it's not even Friday yet.




Hey there, disgruntled Swiss person...and welcome to the forum.

The pseudo-back story of being Swiss and living here 20 years is quite likely not true. So welcome back bicycle and enjoy the short stint here.

And even if it's not bicycle: yaaaaaawwwwwwwnnnnnnn

Don't believe me @richdog? Read this conclusion from the horses mouth.

Thanks for writing this epic post it's interesting to see this point of view openly expressed.

Post more on other topics!

tisn't bicycle. Agree on the yawn though.

What a bundle of frustration. I genuinely hope things work out for you.

Ah - it's Cata1yst's sock puppet.

You're welcome. Seemed like you needed to get it off your chest.

...I'm anxiously awaiting part 3 now!!

So anyone actually read all this?

This is all we needed to know.

As an Auslander who has had a few flings and a few relationships with Swiss women over the years, and has met many nice and normal, down-to-earth Swiss girls, I really can't identify with what you write. I also know or have known many other expats who have had flings and also either had in the past, or currently have, relationships with very nice Swiss girls.

I can only assume that you have personal issues (physical, character or more likely a combination of both) which stop you having luck with attracting the opposite sex, which in turn makes you want to write things like this.

Swiss girls have their quirks (don't we all), but there are a lot of nice ones out there.

PS: I highly doubt that you are Swiss, your "syntax" reads like a native English speaker.

Is the OP your alternate account, by any chance? Either that, or just similarly incompetent in communicating with the locals.

Will somebody kindly supply an executive summary of that.

Ha! You've got to second base and it's all over.

Swiss "girls" (women?) are shit.

Hth.

Sure. Kids are asleep and I'm procrastinating writing an email in German.

If you’re coming to Switzerland without having a plan and for the sole purpose of meeting, picking up and/or talk to girls/women - Don't.

ok. this looks like gold, but no time to read now.

why, oh why, didn't you wait for friday to post this???

When you're 20 something and you don't get laid as often as you think you've a right to you have a tendency to think and write weird shit which you are convinced is dispassionate and somehow empirical.

Otherwise known as a Testosteronestau.

Well now, you are 20 and you know it all? Interesting


How to explain then the "So essentially I have no social circle" ?


Please don´t!