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  #21  
Old 15.03.2017, 18:11
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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It sounds a bit overkill but maybe mention it to the police or, better, if you know where he lives or goes to school report it there.

If nothing else, he seems to need some kind of protection because if he tries it on with other people, or kids, it won't be long before someone thumps him, and he is only a kid, as you say.
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I would tell cops, and add a plea for discretion. It seems like this kid needs some serious help.
I'm curious, what is it exactly you expect the police to do? Or better, what do you expect his school to do? Forbid him from talking to older ladies?

A teenage kid came on to a MILF, that was about it. Blame the abundance of online porn which suggests MILFs crave teenage boys, and move on. And for gods sake, make sure your husband leaves him alone.
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  #22  
Old 15.03.2017, 18:13
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

Honestly, if I imagine somebody else at the receiving end of this boy's "experiments", say young kid...Working with young people every day, this kind of experimenting does not sound right to me. Creeps should be aware of consequences. The sooner the better. Cops are usually discrete and tactful, often it is a social worker who would address this.
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Old 15.03.2017, 18:20
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

I know what you mean, but if it was a teenage girl, it wouldn't be half as shocking.

Point is, at 13, boys (and they are boys) dont know social graces when it comes to women. It wont help if when he tries for the first time, the police come knocking on his door.

Its a bit early to be calling him a creep, based on one story on an online forum, no?
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Old 15.03.2017, 18:20
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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I'm curious, what is it exactly you expect the police to do? Or better, what do you expect his school to do? Forbid him from talking to older ladies?

A teenage kid came on to a MILF, that was about it. Blame the abundance of online porn which suggests MILFs crave teenage boys, and move on. And for gods sake, make sure your husband leaves him alone.
What I would expect is that the police contact his parents, and that his parents impress on him that this is not acceptable behaviour.

And yes, the husband should definitely not go after the kid.

Am I getting you right, the existence of Youporn & Co means that anything goes?
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Old 15.03.2017, 18:26
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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What I would expect is that the police contact his parents, and that his parents impress on him that this is not acceptable behaviour.

And yes, the husband should definitely not go after the kid.

Am I getting you right, the existence of Youporn & Co means that anything goes?
You are not.

The point was that the existence of youporn and co has meant teenage boys have a skewed understanding of sex, and the course of actions and events that lead to sex. How much porn do you know of where the guy gets rejected? It might seem ridiculous to you, but it is real. The affect of porn on the average teenage boys brain is longer than the 13 seconds it takes them to rub one out.

The police wont do that. And nor should they - a crime hasn't been committed. The police should not be expected to intervene every time someone is made to feel slightly uncomfortable by a teenage boy. If there is real risk to life or limb, tell the police. Otherwise, be pragmatic.

At this stage it is a (misguided) amorous advance. Its really no different to a guy walking up to you in a crowded bar asking you to dance.
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Old 15.03.2017, 18:29
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

I don't think cops would deal with this at all, but they contact others. I think this stuff gets dealt with soc dept and dept of familly planning/sex edu, those are usually really discrete and smart young people, educated to not stigmatize. It is fast and efficient, a few sessions might be arranged to help him figure out/realize than he might not be dealing with his urges the smartest way.

I do not think our assumptions are important at all, but how OP feels and she is understandably a bit wigged out. I'd report, help cops identify him, and let the system follow a pretty good and quiet protocol.
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  #27  
Old 15.03.2017, 18:36
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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The police should not be expected to intervene every time someone is made to feel slightly uncomfortable by a teenage boy. If there is real risk to life or limb, tell the police. Otherwise, be pragmatic.

At this stage it is a (misguided) amorous advance. Its really no different to a guy walking up to you in a crowded bar asking you to dance.
Neither of us were there. I'm not evaluating the kid or the OP, nor suggesting that she go to the police right now.

What I am advocating is that the OP record any relevant information, and if it turns out that this wasn't innocent or isolated, then she turn to the police.

One can underreact, or overreact to anything, but there is a third option.
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Old 15.03.2017, 18:40
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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I'm curious, what is it exactly you expect the police to do? Or better, what do you expect his school to do? Forbid him from talking to older ladies?

A teenage kid came on to a MILF, that was about it. Blame the abundance of online porn which suggests MILFs crave teenage boys, and move on. And for gods sake, make sure your husband leaves him alone.
Actually it was more to protect the boy than anything else. Granted there isn't much info from the OP but if he's got "issues" which cause behaviour that less understanding people will act aggressively/inappropriately towards him (hubby was going to punch him and wifey took pics of him as a minor) it's reasonable to approach some authorities who can deal with him.
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  #29  
Old 15.03.2017, 18:40
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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Perhaps he just tries his charm with MILFs?
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A teenage kid came on to a MILF, that was about it. Blame the abundance of online porn which suggests MILFs crave teenage boys, and move on.
It's totally unnecessary and frankly unacceptable to use this term to describe someone you don't even know.

So you watch porn. Congratulations. Now grow up.
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  #30  
Old 15.03.2017, 18:42
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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What I am advocating is that the OP record any relevant information, and if it turns out that this wasn't innocent or isolated, then she turn to the police.
Agreed. Get it written down whilst it's fresh in the mind. My first thought reading the post, was that he was trying to get physically close enough to steal from the OP.
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Old 15.03.2017, 18:49
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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Agreed. Get it written down whilst it's fresh in the mind. My first thought reading the post, was that he was trying to get physically close enough to steal from the OP.
Exactly. Wait till the adrenalin level drops off, sit down and record where, when, and any other details while they are fresh in your mind. Who knows, it may have had nothing to do with the OP directly, the kid's "job" may have been simply to distract her from something else that was going on.
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Old 15.03.2017, 19:51
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

Really happy I am not a 13 / 14 year old kid today.
My first girlfriend was when I was 14.
If a 21 year old girl said - game on - It would have been lotto time. I even fancied my 26 year old biology teacher Ms Fitzpatrick - along with the rest of the class.
How old is the OP?
Think that with all this online communication these days, that people have forgotten the basics of relationships..
Call police, social workers, beat up the kid.
Just get real and deal with it yourself. Unless you fancy him.
My wife's niece normally says come back when you can afford me. She works in a restaurant on Bahnhofstr - no offers yet. (Still waiting in hope)

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  #33  
Old 15.03.2017, 20:00
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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A teenage kid came on to a MILF, that was about it. Blame the abundance of online porn which suggests MILFs crave teenage boys, and move on
There must be so many dissapointed guys who now work as handymen and pizza delivery drivers wondering what they're doing wrong.
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  #34  
Old 15.03.2017, 20:15
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

I have had to ask Mr Google what MILF means ... .
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Old 15.03.2017, 20:44
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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Actually it was more to protect the boy than anything else. Granted there isn't much info from the OP but if he's got "issues" which cause behaviour that less understanding people will act aggressively/inappropriately towards him (hubby was going to punch him and wifey took pics of him as a minor) it's reasonable to approach some authorities who can deal with him.
"Issues"?

JFC!

It's called adolescence. It was once considered normal. Now it's a crime. Are you sure you aren't American?
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Old 15.03.2017, 21:03
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

Wait until he faces one of these...

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Old 15.03.2017, 21:21
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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So La La-next time first ask the kid if you can take his picture.
He will want one of her in return .... only fair, no?

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Honestly, if I imagine somebody else at the receiving end of this boy's "experiments", say young kid...Working with young people every day, this kind of experimenting does not sound right to me. Creeps should be aware of consequences. The sooner the better. Cops are usually discrete and tactful, often it is a social worker who would address this.
What did the boy actually do? He had an - odd - idea and proposed it. OP said no because she is sick (?!) which in teen-ager-language means "normally yes why not but not today as I feel sick". So when he saw her again he though he might have a chance this time as the basic idea was not ridiculed last time (pretty brave for a 13/14 year old, actually).

You don't have children of your own? You obviously never worked with teen-agers. These kids need to be taken seriously and given straight forward answers and reasons. So the thing to do would have been to tell him straight that the idea was way out - and why - and that neither you nor any other woman would ever go for it. (And I problably would have asked him how on earth he even came up with that, but that's me LOL).

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"Issues"?

JFC!

It's called adolescence. It was once considered normal. Now it's a crime. Are you sure you aren't American?
Agreed. According to OP's post there was no violence involved (exept by the husband). Boys (girls too of course) should be able to learn that asking is okay - taking no for an answer is correct benaviour. Had he received a clear no who knows, she might never have seen him again.
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Old 15.03.2017, 21:30
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

Here's that 13yr old kid who's just beginning to discover his sexuality, perhaps doesn't even know yet what (French) kisses are in reality but can't wait to find out. So he walks up to OP, saying:

Q: "Can we play a game? If I win I get to kiss you."
A: "No"
Q: "Why not?"
A: "Because I'm sick."

Conclusion: Once OP is well again the answer may or will be "Yes". This is a valid and perfectly reasonable conclusion considering logic only.

So when the kid sees OP next time he hesitantly moves closer, not sure what to make of it as OP is acting a bit weird, perhaps even a bit frightened although (presumably) there's no reason at all. Next thing he realises is that big wannabe "hero" who threatens him and scares him off.

OP, instead of telling a stupid and completely unnecessary lie, tell it like it presumably is ("Sorry but I only kiss the man I love and that's my husband over there." Perhaps even start with "I like you but...") and probably end the boy's fantasies right then and there.

ETA:
OP, the case should be not closed for you. Instead, next time you see him apoligise for being a <selfcensored> and explain the situation.

Last edited by Urs Max; 15.03.2017 at 21:45.
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  #39  
Old 15.03.2017, 22:03
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

To be 13, walk around and offer "a game to play" to uknown adults does not seem like a good idea. Not everybody is going to be harmless as OP is. Not everybody will insist on safe sex, if anything happens. There are too many no-nos as it is. Reporting this behavior does not mean punishing him or over-reacting. If I had a 13yr old who does something like this, I would be really grateful if anyone tried to stop it.
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Old 15.03.2017, 22:07
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Re: advise needed: shall I report the case to police or not

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You don't have children of your own?
Ha!

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You obviously never worked with teen-agers. These kids.
Ha squared!
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