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  #121  
Old 02.05.2017, 09:30
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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I get it, though. Everything is expensive here and people don't like owing favors. I also find it considerate, to offer to share the cost.
Sorry to say but no, you don't. It's about taking part of the burden off the host.

The host(s) spend hours preparing the event, bringing food takes some of that burden off them while simultaneously increasing variety of the food. Plus it will increase the time the hosts aren't burdened with chores, letting everybody have more time with each other. It's the same concept as helping in the kitchen though the real purpose of the latter is sometimes to have a chat in relative privacy.
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  #122  
Old 02.05.2017, 09:34
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

Well if its a burden for the host then maybe they should'nt invite people in the first place.
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Sorry to say but no, you don't. It's about taking part of the burden off the host.

The host(s) spend hours preparing the event, bringing food takes some of that burden off them while simultaneously increasing variety of the food. Plus it will increase the time the hosts aren't burdened with chores, letting everybody have more time with each other. It's the same concept as helping in the kitchen though the real purpose of the latter is sometimes to have a chat in relative privacy.
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  #123  
Old 02.05.2017, 09:38
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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Well if its a burden for the host then maybe they should'nt invite people in the first place.
That's your opinion. Many others follow a different approach, obviously.
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  #124  
Old 02.05.2017, 09:39
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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Everything is expensive here.
Wine isn't.

Tom
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  #125  
Old 02.05.2017, 09:43
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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Wine isn't.

Tom
And petrol is considerably cheaper than over the border or in the UK.
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  #126  
Old 02.05.2017, 09:48
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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...I found the baby/toddler groups in Zurich awful too - so many Mums with perfect babies who'd spend an hour telling you how fantastic motherhood is.. the stepford wives club
THIS! I thought I was the only one who thought this way, being a post-structuralist mom and all that
Not to mention where to buy the most organic baby food, the most organic baby clothes,etc..etc..
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  #127  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:01
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

The good things clearly outweighed the bad things - otherwise I wouldn't still be here 13 years after first arriving.

I remember coming for the interview and walking everywhere because the tram stops were so close together (I'd been living and working in London).

I remember arriving and not getting off the motorway at Altstetten - ending up having to trek back there - and leaving the letting agent waiting for 40 minutes.

I remember my first mortgage requiring haircut

I remember first shopping in Migros - not weighing any of the veg - but being forgiven after I managed to blurt out "first day in Switzerland".

I remember nothing being open on the first Sunday - until I found the bakery.

Karlsburg beer in Denner was 1chf a can

Searching for a first flat in an entirely scattergun approach - getting nowhere fast and settling for a place with a bunch of people who ignored the washing rota.

The Zollamt walking me through everything in broken English to get Z-plates

Not renewing the Z-plates after a year - and getting a big fine.

Summer tyres + a hill + 1 inch of snow + rwd <> Success

First winter doing donuts in an old Volvo estate in any deserted car park with snow/ice

I remember missing the summer of 2003
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  #128  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:06
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

I started a distance relationship with a lovely Swiss girl in 1997, and didn't arrive here full time until 2001, so my first memories mainly come from frequent visits during that initial time.

In no particular order...

Swiss people are trusting enough that I can just pay my bar bill at the end of the night? How awesome is that? And noticing how that trust was always reciprocated.

Visiting the Zürich Uni restaurant with my girlfriend, I had Spätzli for the first time, and spent most of the meal thinking, that Swiss french fries are very spongy.

A certain sense of awe about Zürich as a town, which makes a real effort with it's festivals and events. The niederdorf was a focus, since my lady had a room there, a lovely enclave full of character... and characters!

Sitting in a cinema, someone asked me the time in Swiss German.... I actually recoiled in horror, not knowing what he said, or what to say! Embarrassing.

In the early days, I was not much of a sunflower and did not appreciate the lake. The few times I swam in it, it seemed totally freezing... eventually I got used to it and now love to swim in it almost every day during the summer. I often note with other newer English arrivals that it's the same way with them at the beginning (and often never changes, a shame as it's one of my favourite parts of living here).

My distinct memory of the Swiss as a civilised people... I recall that most conversations with friends in England revolved around beer, football, and the opposite sex. At least in my experience, Swiss people often had a much broader range of interests and I had many interesting discussions.
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  #129  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:17
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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THIS! I thought I was the only one who thought this way, being a post-structuralist mom and all that
Not to mention where to buy the most organic baby food, the most organic baby clothes,etc..etc..
In truth, an expat baby group in Switzerland should have raised a big red flag before even considering to take part.
Ah, we all live and learn.
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  #130  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:18
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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I get it, though. Everything is expensive here and people don't like owing favors. I also find it considerate, to offer to share the cost.
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Sorry to say but no, you don't. It's about taking part of the burden off the host.

The host(s) spend hours preparing the event, bringing food takes some of that burden off them while simultaneously increasing variety of the food. Plus it will increase the time the hosts aren't burdened with chores, letting everybody have more time with each other. It's the same concept as helping in the kitchen though the real purpose of the latter is sometimes to have a chat in relative privacy.
You don't think it is considerate to offer to the host to share the cost and bring something?

Lol, it is funny how argumentative people will get over points they agree with
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  #131  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:28
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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Sorry to say but no, you don't. It's about taking part of the burden off the host.
Not to mention the gluten free, lactose free, vegan, vegetarian, allergies... etc If people bring something they are least know they can eat that if nothing else appeals to their stricture.
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  #132  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:31
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

I remember it was the hottest summer I've had here so far.. 30 + for a long time and boiling to death in a minergie house which had special windows that absorb heat and release into house.. So had to have window shutters closed all day..

And as someone who learnt German in the bastion of hoch deutsch in Niedersachsen the first interaction at coop Säckli wölla
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  #133  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:32
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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The bbq and birthday comments made me laugh. It is true..I can't get used to friends and neighbors calling me asking what they should bring, when I invite them for dinner. Nothing! Invitation is an invitation!

I get it, though. Everything is expensive here and people don't like owing favors. I also find it considerate, to offer to share the cost.
If you think more of it, is it so different than in other places where people might not call to ask what to bring but bring some small gifts for the hosts anyway - wine, flowers, chocolate box etc.
I find the Swiss approach more pragmatic tbh. But yeah, was something I also have to get used to. I totally get the sentiment behind it.
Also, offering to help in the kitchen- we are also used to that..and agree with Urs it brings even more closeness. Not that different, I think.
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  #134  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:41
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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You don't think it is considerate to offer to the host to share the cost and bring something?

Lol, it is funny how argumentative people will get over points they agree with
You seem to confuse main motive with consequence.
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  #135  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:43
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

And work thinking I'm gay as keep saying mein freund instead of kollege
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  #136  
Old 02.05.2017, 10:46
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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In the early days, I was not much of a sunflower and did not appreciate the lake. The few times I swam in it, it seemed totally freezing... eventually I got used to it and now love to swim in it almost every day during the summer. I often note with other newer English arrivals that it's the same way with them at the beginning (and often never changes, a shame as it's one of my favourite parts of living here).
It is true - I also did not swim at first. People back home were horrified that people actually swim in waters polluted by cercariae. We completely haphasardly seemed to find the cheapest Migros sunscreen that these larvae did not like. Kept swimming and boarding until now. The only problem my kid had with this parasite was when creche decided one hot day to dip the kids in an old water fountain.
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  #137  
Old 02.05.2017, 11:02
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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In truth, an expat baby group in Switzerland should have raised a big red flag before even considering to take part.
Ah, we all live and learn.
Suffering from the post-baby blue, I think I didn't see the flag was actually red
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  #138  
Old 02.05.2017, 11:19
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

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Suffering from the post-baby blue, I think I didn't see the flag was actually red
FRose, even if you tried hard you couldn't have found worse moments to hang out with them...
I thought of myself as being very ahem, talented in this area, but it seems I always have someone to look up to. Well done, lady!
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  #139  
Old 02.05.2017, 11:22
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

Talking about going to peoples' houses for dinner - I remember one such occasion early on in my time here - friends of my sister-in-law.

We arrived at their flat early evening and sat around for a bit. It would have been nice to be offered a drink - at least that is what would have happened in the U.K. or other countries but different cultures and all that....

Then they gave us a detailed guided tour of the flat. It would have been nice to be offered a drink. I was a bit thirsty at this point.

Then we sat down and talked a bit more whilst the wife finished off the meal prep. It would have been nice to be offered a drink.

Then we sat down to eat. A salad to start. It would have been nice to be offered a drink. I was a really thirsty at this point.
We finished the first course.

We talked a bit more. It would have been nice to be offered a drink.

Finally, half way through the main course, the host got up, poured the wine and proclaimed that he didn't enjoy having wine with salad so he kept it for the main course! He didn't let us drink much either.

I've seen wine severely rationed by other people here too. The big problem is that it seems to be these people who say they are going to bring the wine.

However, when we invited our elderly Swiss neighbours for an apero, the drink flowed freely and it was the same when we went there.
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  #140  
Old 02.05.2017, 11:39
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Re: First contact: memories of your first months in Switzerland

I remember in my first job when ever went out for dinner round a colleagues or for lunch in restaurant they always offered me a wide selection of booze always saying 'you have the English gene' which only after a while transpired that they all thought English are raging alcoholics.
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