Go Back   English Forum Switzerland > Living in Switzerland > Daily life
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:14
rag rag is offline
Newbie
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: winterthur
Posts: 5
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 36 Times in 6 Posts
rag is considered knowledgeablerag is considered knowledgeablerag is considered knowledgeable
i'm dying everyday.

hello guys.

Just wanted to share my Problems with some one ,im pretty sure you guys thinks that im a mad . the reason why i Choice this Diskussion forum is,no one know me .so i can share my feelings openly .

Its all about how i got betreibungs and what i got after betreibungs , and what im doing to pay and clear that .

I KNOW , ITS ALL ARE MY FLAUT .its came by my uneducated knowledge with Handling money .

in 2016 June i lost my job .so my all bills[bank credit ,and my other monthly paying ,pending bills ] went to betreibungsamt .its is about 80 000 Fr . Rav said , they cant pay for me to next 60 working days .thats why i was not able to pay those bills .because i had a bank credit to 66 000 Fr .

then in 3 months i found 2 jobs . one is 100 % and other one is 40 % . i worked Morning 5.15 to 9 in a place , then evening 14.30 to 23.30 in another place ,i forgot my sleep and my aim was only to clear those amount in betreibungsamt .i earn like 6400 Fr monthly [Burtto] .betreibungsamt calculated and paid me 2500 fr for month ,and rest they took . my home rent was 1700 ,but they paid 1200 for it .so i took the money they allow me for foods , cloths and mobile .so i forgot my foods ,and new cloths too with sleep .i paid about 30 000 fr in one year back to betreibungsamt .

then again in 2017 July i lost one job .which is was 100 % . im searching searching jobs ,but did not find .and this time was also wrong in my side ,so rav did not pay for 39 working days . so i was not able to pay my home rent ,medical insurance . but one of my friend helped me to pay my 1 months hause bills ,and last month social help winterthur paid me . so from this month rav will pay to me . This the short stroy of mine .

Now i will tell you , what i lost in my life ,forgot in my life .how i feel right now .

Lost and Forgot - 1. my wife ,she s living in france ,and i have applied for sponger here ,she said when she come , she can work and help me to clear my betreibung quickly ,so i applied to Immigration ,but i got rejected ,reason was that lohnpfändung amount is not enough for 2 peopls ,but i found a job for her 100 % applied with that work Betrag .No she can not come till i clear my bills .
2. i lost my sleep ,foods ,happiness ,friends ,my peace ,holidays ,etc etc .

How im feeling right now is , i feel like waste one , i dont know why im living in the world ,most times when i think hard , i though it would be better and peace when i make suicide .

really really i dont know , what i have to do . i feel shame ,bad ,mad ,et .

No one there to help ,of course i can not ask , because its all came because of my unacknowledged about handling money . IM REALLY BLANK.............

No idea ... sorry guys . thank you if any one read my story .
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank rag for this useful post:
  #2  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:21
amogles's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Zurich
Posts: 9,094
Groaned at 174 Times in 149 Posts
Thanked 17,023 Times in 7,224 Posts
amogles has a reputation beyond reputeamogles has a reputation beyond reputeamogles has a reputation beyond reputeamogles has a reputation beyond reputeamogles has a reputation beyond reputeamogles has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

How sad.

I hope you can find a solution and overcome your problems.
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank amogles for this useful post:
  #3  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:30
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Zurich
Posts: 3,916
Groaned at 116 Times in 74 Posts
Thanked 5,833 Times in 2,063 Posts
Kittster has a reputation beyond reputeKittster has a reputation beyond reputeKittster has a reputation beyond reputeKittster has a reputation beyond reputeKittster has a reputation beyond reputeKittster has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

I know this is a very easy thing to say when not in this situation, but please do not use a permanent "solution" for what is a temporary problem, much less for one that is surmountable if you get help. Unfortunately, I did not understand everything you wrote and how one thing relates to another but from what I gather, your debts are too much for you to handle.

The first step is to go and see a free Schuldenberatung from the state or an official charity or church - do not fall for companies that offer to finance you out of your debt, you will end up in even more trouble. If you are really from Winterthur, there are various places that you can turn to - they will not pay your debts or give you a loan but your situation is far from unique and they will know what to do:
Schuldenberatung Kanton Zürich
Caritas
Katholische Kirche Winterthur

It is important to make a list of all your debts and find a contact person, the Schuldenberatung will tell you to get in touch with them. If you already have a Lohnpfändung, the Gemeinde should have offered you some sort of support, surprised that did not happen. The important thing is to become proactive, even if it is almost unbearable. Ask for help - don't give up.

Good luck.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:31
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,422
Groaned at 10 Times in 10 Posts
Thanked 3,572 Times in 1,396 Posts
doropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Hello rag
I read your story.
It sounds like you are in a very, very difficult situation. I have sympathy for that.

You say your wife lives in France. I have some questions about her, and if she can help you in any way.
Is she a French citizen?
Is she "EU" or non-EU?
Does she have a job in France?
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank doropfiz for this useful post:
  #5  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:32
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Leimbach, Zürich
Posts: 1,514
Groaned at 90 Times in 65 Posts
Thanked 1,412 Times in 727 Posts
EdwinNL has a reputation beyond reputeEdwinNL has a reputation beyond reputeEdwinNL has a reputation beyond reputeEdwinNL has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

What nationality is your wife?
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank EdwinNL for this useful post:
  #6  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:35
Dougal's Breakfast's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: GL
Posts: 16,373
Groaned at 1,036 Times in 802 Posts
Thanked 43,256 Times in 13,401 Posts
Dougal's Breakfast has a reputation beyond reputeDougal's Breakfast has a reputation beyond reputeDougal's Breakfast has a reputation beyond reputeDougal's Breakfast has a reputation beyond reputeDougal's Breakfast has a reputation beyond reputeDougal's Breakfast has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Quote:
View Post
How im feeling right now is , i feel like waste one , i dont know why im living in the world ,most times when i think hard , i though it would be better and peace when i make suicide .
I'm the last person to ask about finance - I'm sure there will be plenty of better educated people who can advise you on these matters - but I've got to say something about this.

Suicide is not the solution. It is a permanent answer to a temporary problem - just take a minute to think: in your current situation what is the absolute worst that could happen? Whatever it is, how does it compare to being dead, forever, destroying all hope of ever experiencing anything better ever again and leaving those who love you bereft and bereaved?

Life can be pretty shitty sometimes. I've found myself in some quite unpleasant situations where my face was flat against a brick wall and I couldn't see a door - nor could I believe that there even was a door. There was even a time when I forced myself to sit down while waiting for the train because I couldn't trust myself not to make an instant - and permanent - decision. But somehow I got through, and life improved for a bit. Then it was shit again. Then it got better again. Then... well, you get the picture.

Life is hard. But it's also wonderful. It's the most precious gift we have - even when we're in debt, or have just been dumped, or discover we have a chronic illness, or whatever. None of those difficulties compare with being dead, forever, with no hope of ever feeling the sunshine on your face or smelling freshly cut grass or running through the crisp autumn leaves or just looking at the clouds.

Like I say, other people will offer more practical advice, but from someone who's been at the very bottom of the trough, I just want to say: keep at it. It will get better. I can't say how or when, but it will.

Courage!
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:36
JagWaugh's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Eglisau
Posts: 5,805
Groaned at 40 Times in 39 Posts
Thanked 10,963 Times in 4,311 Posts
JagWaugh has a reputation beyond reputeJagWaugh has a reputation beyond reputeJagWaugh has a reputation beyond reputeJagWaugh has a reputation beyond reputeJagWaugh has a reputation beyond reputeJagWaugh has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Rag,

There are times when the only thing we can do is hang on and feel shitty.

The sun is shining, go for a walk in the sun.

Suicide is not a solution.
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank JagWaugh for this useful post:
  #8  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:43
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,422
Groaned at 10 Times in 10 Posts
Thanked 3,572 Times in 1,396 Posts
doropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Rag,
do you have a Caritas Card? It is sometimes also called a Kultur-Legi.

If you get one, you can buy food more cheaply at the Caritas shops.
In Winterthur, there is one here: Zürcherstrasse 77, 8406 Winterthur.

Here is how to apply:
https://www.kulturlegi.ch/zuerich/ku...wo-beantragen/

If you feel too exhausted to apply, then please try to ask your friend to help you. Or ask at one of the places Kittster linked. I think they will help you.
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank doropfiz for this useful post:
  #9  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:51
ZuriRollt's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Zürich
Posts: 2,944
Groaned at 83 Times in 59 Posts
Thanked 3,435 Times in 1,511 Posts
ZuriRollt has a reputation beyond reputeZuriRollt has a reputation beyond reputeZuriRollt has a reputation beyond reputeZuriRollt has a reputation beyond reputeZuriRollt has a reputation beyond reputeZuriRollt has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

I'm sorry to read about your situation Rag.

Sometimes one needs a little bit of support in life, and it's a perfectly normal reaction to suffer from depression when life throws us one of it's blows (I have been there too).

As well as the advice given by others here, I would strongly recommend that you speak with your GP about getting some support from a Psychiatrist. Through your doctors referral, the basic Krankenkasse will cover the costs.

It sounds as if you are a very strong person, and have already achieved so much in handling this situation. Sometimes we all just need additional support.

Good luck, and keep up your strength to continue getting through this. It will pass, even if it takes time. And once it has passed, you can look back on it, and continue your life as a person who has grown even stronger from this experience.
Reply With Quote
The following 8 users would like to thank ZuriRollt for this useful post:
  #10  
Old 20.10.2017, 15:55
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,422
Groaned at 10 Times in 10 Posts
Thanked 3,572 Times in 1,396 Posts
doropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Quote:
View Post
It sounds as if you are a very strong person, and have already achieved so much in handling this situation.
YES!
You say you worked two jobs, and by doing so you managed to pay the Betreibungsamt Fr. 30'000 in one year! I think that is a huge achievement. Well done for that part!
Reply With Quote
The following 12 users would like to thank doropfiz for this useful post:
  #11  
Old 20.10.2017, 16:30
Patsycat's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Geneva
Posts: 2,255
Groaned at 50 Times in 35 Posts
Thanked 2,918 Times in 1,146 Posts
Patsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

I dont like your thread title. Some of us here, are in fact on that unknown road.

Social Services have been great to me. Taken a lot of the financial woes away, been kind and considerate. You have to be honest with them and they will help. It takes time and patience and they wont pay off your debt, are those not at Poursuite level? If so forget them. I have some that are lying there since 20 years!

Why are you here and not in France with your wife?

Dont worry, you wont be left out on the street. And, do enjoy the good weather. The winters can be very depressing.

Smile!
Reply With Quote
The following 16 users would like to thank Patsycat for this useful post:
  #12  
Old 20.10.2017, 16:35
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Winterthur
Posts: 204
Groaned at 6 Times in 5 Posts
Thanked 146 Times in 72 Posts
Silvestre has earned the respect of manySilvestre has earned the respect of manySilvestre has earned the respect of many
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Rag,

Unfortunately, I haven't got any financial advice but like a lot of other people have said, suicide is not the solution certainly not when the problem is money. Think about your wife, family and all the loved ones, what about them?

A lot of us make mistakes and I think it is ok to make mistakes, we are human after all, but you are learning from those mistakes and also putting them right so well done!

Quote:
View Post
i lost my sleep ,foods ,happiness ,friends ,my peace ,holidays ,etc etc .
Not eating and not sleeping is not going to help with anything.

I know you said you are here because you want to be anonymous but I am in Winterthur as well so if I can help with something (perhaps food) then please let me know.

As someone else said, working 2 jobs and clearing 30k in a year is no easy task. I am sure it is only a matter of time when you will come out of this as a bigger and better person.
Reply With Quote
The following 9 users would like to thank Silvestre for this useful post:
  #13  
Old 20.10.2017, 16:39
pilatus1's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: directly above center of earth
Posts: 1,241
Groaned at 136 Times in 88 Posts
Thanked 3,311 Times in 1,323 Posts
pilatus1 has a reputation beyond reputepilatus1 has a reputation beyond reputepilatus1 has a reputation beyond reputepilatus1 has a reputation beyond reputepilatus1 has a reputation beyond reputepilatus1 has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Quote:
View Post
I dont like your thread title.
I thought it must just be clickbait for some thread about dying... knitting yarn or something like that.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank pilatus1 for this useful post:
  #14  
Old 20.10.2017, 16:51
Patsycat's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Geneva
Posts: 2,255
Groaned at 50 Times in 35 Posts
Thanked 2,918 Times in 1,146 Posts
Patsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond reputePatsycat has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Im not interested in knitting anymore - i got my Blankie...
Reply With Quote
The following 14 users would like to thank Patsycat for this useful post:
  #15  
Old 20.10.2017, 21:22
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,422
Groaned at 10 Times in 10 Posts
Thanked 3,572 Times in 1,396 Posts
doropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Rag, since you're new on this forum, the last two post about knitting might not make any sense to you. Don't worry. They are references to a huge amount of goodwill that is here on this forum, as people reach out to see whether, even in some small way, they can comfort someone else.

So please write more. You are welcome.
Reply With Quote
The following 9 users would like to thank doropfiz for this useful post:
  #16  
Old 20.10.2017, 21:50
jacek's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Aargau
Posts: 7,761
Groaned at 98 Times in 77 Posts
Thanked 5,230 Times in 2,940 Posts
jacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

You will find lots of friends here offering some advices and support. Anytime life gets tough come back here. Don’t give up, don’t despair. Things will fall into place for you. They always do at some point of life.

I like Kittster’s suggestion. I cannot believe on earth that with such large accumulated debt, there won’t be any institution to help you with writing it off under your current situation and circumstances. Once you are in the system there should be enough social support to make life easier. Instead of grafting all day and night, try to approach this problem systematically and ask those above mentioned places for advice. Don’t get into more debt drawn from financial institutions.

Try to look at the bright side of life. There’s always a way.
__________________
🎾That's what we do to help English speaking expats community in Switzerland:
General Information About Swiss Tennis
Tennis Lessons Summer Winter Seasons
🎾🎾Our charity organization to help unprivileged kids to realize their dreams:
FMTF Supports Tennis For Children in Southern Africa
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank jacek for this useful post:
  #17  
Old 21.10.2017, 16:26
omtatsat's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Timbuktoo/Zürich
Posts: 4,747
Groaned at 622 Times in 329 Posts
Thanked 1,624 Times in 1,062 Posts
omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat
Re: i'm dying everyday.

So where is some feedback from the OP?
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 21.10.2017, 20:26
rag rag is offline
Newbie
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: winterthur
Posts: 5
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 36 Times in 6 Posts
rag is considered knowledgeablerag is considered knowledgeablerag is considered knowledgeable
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Thank you so much for all who replayed me . your words are really Pushing me to go forward , im sorry for late replay ,because i use internet when i in railway station . Thank a lot guys .

as you guys noted ,i will really go and ask some ideas or consulting about Handling my Situation.

i came here and posted , because my mind needed motivation or some positive words .you guys gave that to me . THATS IS REALLY BIG .

i have talked with my EX chef ,and he has plan to take me back to work .so hope i will start my work from start of DEC . so i will work from Dec 140 % like before i worked .,and hope i will clear my debits in betreibungsamt quickly .

Now a days i dont care about my sleep ,and free times . my aim is only one , that clear my betreibungs .
in last one year , i paid about 30 000 CHF , so and more about 50 000 to more .

I will .and after i clear that , i will post about that in same forum ,with my payment photos .

THANK YOU VERY MUCH ALL .YOU GUYS REALLY PUSHING ME FORWARD .
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 21.10.2017, 21:03
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,422
Groaned at 10 Times in 10 Posts
Thanked 3,572 Times in 1,396 Posts
doropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond reputedoropfiz has a reputation beyond repute
Re: i'm dying everyday.

Thank you, thank you, Rag, for coming back and posting again.
Please post more here, any time you need some encouragement.

Your story is sad, because you feel so desperate. But on another level it is inspiring. Really inspiring. Because you have not looked around for ten other people to blame, but you said yourself that you understand that you made some mistakes. And also, it is impressive that you are so very determined to work hard to make things right again.

There are so many other people in the world who get into some sort of mess, and then only want to make someone else take the blame, and who will not get on with doing what they can to put the situation right. I am moved to read that you are willing to do everything you can to clear that debt! Well done!

Please try to get some sleep. Everything is worse when one is overtired - that's true for just about everyone.

I hope that you can go to see one of the offices that Kittster linked to. Ask them to help you write letters to the companies to whom you owe money. Sometimes, a company will agree to reduce the debt a small bit, when they can see that they are getting something in. I am not saying try to get out of paying. And you obviously have the right intention to pay. Good. But it is worth asking if some of your creditors might write off (in German this is "abschreiben") a part of your debt. This is not charity. It can be a wise business decision for a creditor, because it increases the chance that you will really get through the year to pay back what you can. The right time to ask for this is soon, before you get your job back in December.

Oh, and good that you spoke to your former employer!
Reply With Quote
The following 10 users would like to thank doropfiz for this useful post:
  #20  
Old 21.10.2017, 21:54
rag rag is offline
Newbie
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: winterthur
Posts: 5
Groaned at 0 Times in 0 Posts
Thanked 36 Times in 6 Posts
rag is considered knowledgeablerag is considered knowledgeablerag is considered knowledgeable
Re: i'm dying everyday.

thanks a lot mate . yes i have spoke with my Ex chef today , and he said , he will get back from Dec .so that is really a big help like you guys did here in forum .

and i can not and i dont want to blame any one , because this all came because of me and my un knowledge of money handling .

yes , i will be here and post in this forum .

thank you again .
Reply With Quote
The following 7 users would like to thank rag for this useful post:
Reply




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Everyday etiquette glowjupiter Daily life 31 29.04.2014 22:00
Nanny/babysitter needed everyday mk1972 Jobs offered 1 16.12.2012 22:41
Stupid everyday expressions Louis Wu General off-topic 85 12.09.2009 20:17
Vonage dying ... Polorise TV/internet/telephone 0 10.05.2007 23:28


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 00:55.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0