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Old 17.05.2020, 19:24
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Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

Talking to some midwives recently, and apparently there's been a marked drop in cases of Post Natal Depression since only the spouse has been permitted to visit mum. So much so that they're thinking of introducing it as normal practice.

Apparently, letting mum cuddle the newborn and have no family stresses is a really really good thing.

Food for thought anyway.
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Old 17.05.2020, 19:36
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

Or maybe it is due to a lot Mum's having their husbands at home at the moment, meaning they are not left at home to deal with the baby once Dad is normally back at work?
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Old 17.05.2020, 19:43
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Talking to some midwives recently, and apparently there's been a marked drop in cases of Post Natal Depression since only the spouse has been permitted to visit mum. So much so that they're thinking of introducing it as normal practice.

Apparently, letting mum cuddle the newborn and have no family stresses is a really really good thing.

Food for thought anyway.

Postnatal depression does not manifest itself that quickly. Takes a couple of weeks. The "baby blues" is a bit quicker.

I can't imagine anything worse than being in sole charge of a new born after just giving birth. You need the support.


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Or maybe it is due to a lot Mum's having their husbands at home at the moment, meaning they are not left at home to deal with the baby once Dad is normally back at work?

This.
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Old 17.05.2020, 19:58
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

The paucity of paternity leave is an absolute scandal.

Here in Switzerland its just gone up from 1 day (!) to 2 weeks. Thankfully, my company has a much more reasonable 3 months.
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Old 18.05.2020, 08:30
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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I can't imagine anything worse than being in sole charge of a new born after just giving birth. You need the support.
This is while they're in the hospital. There are nurses there specifically to provide support. What you don't need, apparently, is great aunt nelly coming and telling you what you're doing wrong.

And yes, maybe it's this that and the other - I was just reporting what the midwifes had said when my grandsprog was born yesterday.

Btw - my son only got 1 day paternity leave. But his employer gave him an additional 5 days vacation this year so he could be with his wife and new baby!
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Old 18.05.2020, 08:37
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Postnatal depression does not manifest itself that quickly. Takes a couple of weeks. The "baby blues" is a bit quicker.

I can't imagine anything worse than being in sole charge of a new born after just giving birth. You need the support.





This.
Careful at "you need the support". Must come from someone who's not freaking out at any cough, crying, screaming etc of the new baby.

Talking from experience....

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Talking to some midwives recently, and apparently there's been a marked drop in cases of Post Natal Depression since only the spouse has been permitted to visit mum. So much so that they're thinking of introducing it as normal practice.

Apparently, letting mum cuddle the newborn and have no family stresses is a really really good thing.

Food for thought anyway.
Haha, why am I not surprised.... I knew that and didn't repeat first time around mistakes.
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Old 18.05.2020, 09:51
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Apparently, letting mum cuddle the newborn and have no family stresses is a really really good thing.
My midwife reminded us that we didn't need to tell anyone the due date or even after the birth until we had had time to bond. We announced it a week later.
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Old 18.05.2020, 10:13
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

lied about due date of third child.... by a month!


But as others have said, postnatal depression normally does not appear until quite a long time after the birth. And it's more likely to be detected or disclosed to a close friend or family member than it is by a nurse or doctor.


As others have said, the current situation really is slowing everything down...


Postnatal depression risk factors:


Previous history of depression and anxiety
Negative attitude towards the pregnancy
Stressful life events
History of Sexual Abuse
Rejection of the baby's gender
Low self-esteem
High-risk pregnancy
Postpartum complications
Very low birthweight baby
Sleeping difficulties for the mother before birth
Lack of social support
Domestic Violence
Social factors
Health factors




Personally, I am very skeptical of midwives or doctors reporting lower rates of depression. As a second-time mum I participated in a 'new mums group' and the midwife shut me down when I mentioned PND in the group. She acted like you could 'catch it' if you talked about it. I found out later they were part of a study to show the lower rate of PND in mothers who participated in the group. Not surprisingly they were lower - but not because of the group - because the mothers were not allowed to talk about mental health in the group, and mothers who are struggling are very unlikely to join a group full of 'supermoms'....



Give it a year....I suspect it's just hidden because of the lower interaction and also the pressure of everyone to 'keep it together' right now...
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Old 18.05.2020, 15:20
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Personally, I am very skeptical of midwives or doctors reporting lower rates of depression. As a second-time mum I participated in a 'new mums group' and the midwife shut me down when I mentioned PND in the group. She acted like you could 'catch it' if you talked about it. I found out later they were part of a study to show the lower rate of PND in mothers who participated in the group. Not surprisingly they were lower - but not because of the group - because the mothers were not allowed to talk about mental health in the group, and mothers who are struggling are very unlikely to join a group full of 'supermoms'....
I suspect these mom groups can be really toxic to some of us. I never had postnatal depression or anything, but I also found these groups to be-- difficult. I gave them a try and found them to be exhausting since I always had to pretend to want to be happy about everything. New parents get to be grouchy when they want to, sometimes things go wrong and it sucks. In both groups I joined, the only thing it was deemed okay to complain about was the husband.
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Old 18.05.2020, 16:08
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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...And yes, maybe it's this that and the other - I was just reporting what the midwifes had said when my grandsprog was born yesterday...
Congratulations on your new grandbaby!
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Old 18.05.2020, 19:55
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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My midwife reminded us that we didn't need to tell anyone the due date or even after the birth until we had had time to bond. We announced it a week later.
Bit difficult as we were the ones looking after my grandson. (We're very young grandparents - not in at risk groups).
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Old 18.05.2020, 21:13
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Bit difficult as we were the ones looking after my grandson. (We're very young grandparents - not in at risk groups).
Hey! Congrats on becoming a grandparent! That's big news!

Did you know there is a Grandparents Day?


Last edited by MusicChick; 18.05.2020 at 21:29.
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Old 18.05.2020, 22:00
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

I was diagnosed with postnatal depression by a psychiatrist about one year after my son was born. His instinct was to put me on an anti-depressant (the thought of which did not settle very well with me). But then he happened to notice that my iron levels were a bit low after seeing the blood report sent to him by my house doctor. My house doctor had told me my iron levels were fine at a score of 38. But the psychiatrist said that in women, the score should be 50 or higher. He gave me two intravenous iron infusions, and I literally felt like Wonder Woman afterward.

Anyways... I'm certainly not trying to imply that postnatal (postpartum?) depression is always due to an iron deficiency, but I do wish that when someone reports being depressed, doctors would check their blood work before prescribing anti-depressants.

The other thing is that sleep-deprivation easily causes depression -- or at least it causes our emotions to become amplified. I think that was the most difficult thing for me to deal with after my son was born -- the sleep deprivation.
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Old 18.05.2020, 22:15
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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This is while they're in the hospital. There are nurses there specifically to provide support. What you don't need, apparently, is great aunt nelly coming and telling you what you're doing wrong.
!
well, I got home after an emergency section after 3 days. I was very young, in a foreign country, no family and no support at all- and an OH working very long hours, including nights and week-ends. I would have killed to have great aunt nelly to l give a hand and let me have a couple hours of sleep from time to time and cook me a meal. But hey ho...Are you a man btw?

Thank goodness when I had number two, I had auntie Betty next door, who was amazing and took us all under her wings. Bless her (long gone now).
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Old 18.05.2020, 22:22
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Talking to some midwives recently, and apparently there's been a marked drop in cases of Post Natal Depression since only the spouse has been permitted to visit mum. So much so that they're thinking of introducing it as normal practice.
I hope any decision to change practice will be more measured.

Correlation does not prove causation.
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Old 18.05.2020, 22:23
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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Here in Switzerland its just gone up from 1 day (!) to 2 weeks.
Since when?
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Old 19.05.2020, 09:28
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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well, I got home after an emergency section after 3 days. I was very young, in a foreign country, no family and no support at all- and an OH working very long hours, including nights and week-ends. I would have killed to have great aunt nelly to l give a hand and let me have a couple hours of sleep from time to time and cook me a meal. But hey ho...Are you a man btw?

Thank goodness when I had number two, I had auntie Betty next door, who was amazing and took us all under her wings. Bless her (long gone now).
Yeah, I know this is what people usually say. And if you're disagreeing you're the spoiled brat who doesn't deserve their mom/aunt's kindness.

My mom travelled here to be with us for our first one (btw I think OP should be grateful for that, not everyone is that privileged anymore ) Physically, she helped a lot..You can't believe how hard working she was her entire life. She had a job that came with many responsibilities and stress, and she worked incredibly hard at home too. We didn't have cleaning ladies etc, not even when it started to be fashionable, each of us had to do their part. I still stick to this mentality btw. Long story short - suffice to say that she helped me a lot, but psychologically.. she dragged me down and anxiety and insecurity creeped in. I think we really need people who are a bit more detached (psychologically) from us and we from them.

I appreciated my m-i-l's help with the second one more because she was/is the opposite. Calm, leaving us space for own mistakes. She might have gotten that I'm fiercely independent and chose to work with it not against it .. She is a former educator btw and has a lot of patience, my kids learn a lot of things from her. She's the incredible type who was kind not only with kids but with adults too, having to talk with so many parents. Please don't misinterpret my words, both mom and m-i-l have equal access and both love their grandkids beyond reason, no doubt (in my mom's case "grandmothering" came with incredible joy and anxiety too)...Bless them..I miss them both. OK, I miss my mom a bit more...
This pandemic and lockdown and everything we have to change now, postponing to visit or be visited by our family...it makes me sad and kind of angry or frustrated tbh...but let's hope things will be fine again soon.

Anyways, apparently I missed OP's post about him welcoming a grandson, congrats from all my heart. As for new moms out there - postnatal depression is a real thing.
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Old 19.05.2020, 11:36
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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This is while they're in the hospital. There are nurses there specifically to provide support. What you don't need, apparently, is great aunt nelly coming and telling you what you're doing wrong.

And yes, maybe it's this that and the other - I was just reporting what the midwifes had said when my grandsprog was born yesterday.

Btw - my son only got 1 day paternity leave. But his employer gave him an additional 5 days vacation this year so he could be with his wife and new baby!

I understand and I disagree. Maybe it's a country difference but I would have struggled (post emergency c section) to have been alone with my second.

Close family only visiting I agree with.

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Careful at "you need the support". Must come from someone who's not freaking out at any cough, crying, screaming etc of the new baby.

Talking from experience....
It took me a while to umderstand what you were getting at here.... yes, obviously actual support and not veiled criticism.

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But as others have said, postnatal depression normally does not appear until quite a long time after the birth. And it's more likely to be detected or disclosed to a close friend or family member than it is by a nurse or doctor.


As others have said, the current situation really is slowing everything down...


Postnatal depression risk factors:


Previous history of depression and anxiety
Negative attitude towards the pregnancy
Stressful life events
History of Sexual Abuse
Rejection of the baby's gender
Low self-esteem
High-risk pregnancy
Postpartum complications
Very low birthweight baby
Sleeping difficulties for the mother before birth
Lack of social support
Domestic Violence
Social factors
Health factors




Personally, I am very skeptical of midwives or doctors reporting lower rates of depression. As a second-time mum I participated in a 'new mums group' and the midwife shut me down when I mentioned PND in the group. She acted like you could 'catch it' if you talked about it. I found out later they were part of a study to show the lower rate of PND in mothers who participated in the group. Not surprisingly they were lower - but not because of the group - because the mothers were not allowed to talk about mental health in the group, and mothers who are struggling are very unlikely to join a group full of 'supermoms'....



Give it a year....I suspect it's just hidden because of the lower interaction and also the pressure of everyone to 'keep it together' right now...
Shocking attitude of midwife there - the mental health "fear" I suppose, unforgivable in a medical professional.

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I suspect these mom groups can be really toxic to some of us. I never had postnatal depression or anything, but I also found these groups to be-- difficult. I gave them a try and found them to be exhausting since I always had to pretend to want to be happy about everything. New parents get to be grouchy when they want to, sometimes things go wrong and it sucks. In both groups I joined, the only thing it was deemed okay to complain about was the husband.
They are. Agreed.
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Old 19.05.2020, 11:37
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

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I was diagnosed with postnatal depression by a psychiatrist about one year after my son was born. His instinct was to put me on an anti-depressant (the thought of which did not settle very well with me). But then he happened to notice that my iron levels were a bit low after seeing the blood report sent to him by my house doctor. My house doctor had told me my iron levels were fine at a score of 38. But the psychiatrist said that in women, the score should be 50 or higher. He gave me two intravenous iron infusions, and I literally felt like Wonder Woman afterward.

Anyways... I'm certainly not trying to imply that postnatal (postpartum?) depression is always due to an iron deficiency, but I do wish that when someone reports being depressed, doctors would check their blood work before prescribing anti-depressants.

The other thing is that sleep-deprivation easily causes depression -- or at least it causes our emotions to become amplified. I think that was the most difficult thing for me to deal with after my son was born -- the sleep deprivation.

I'm sorry you went through this. PND is awful.
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Old 19.05.2020, 12:58
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Re: Lockdown and Post Natal Depression

Greenmount- I agree that 'too much help' can really add up to interference and lack of confidence. I certainly would not have like my mum, as much as I loved her, and as much as I terribly miss her- to live with us for sure. And even less my mother in law !!! Also agree about close family only visiting- in some cultures and countries, the traditional visits by all and sundry to 'welcome' the baby must be overwhelming. I also had a colleague in the UK who lived in her OH's extended family- and her MIL more or less forced her to bottle feed- so she could be in charge. It caused massive heartache, resentment and depression too. I remember getting so much conflicting advice re sleeping, crying, BF, etc- from health staff and others- in the end I had to say 'leave me to it- I shall find my own way, thanks' - and I did.

Getting the balance right is almost impossible. With Auntie Betty, our next door neighbour when I had second baby- she never took over or gave advice- but she would say things like 'go to bed for a couple of hours- I'll take your two at mine... come when you are ready' - or she'd turn up with a stew or a cake- and say, I made some for you as I was making ours. Brilliant - She had bottled her 3, but totally respected that I wanted to BF- and I just got on with it.

however, back to OP - and yes I am surprised. Mind you in Swiss hospitals they keep you for a decent amount of time - unlike the UK where you are sent back home within hours or 1 night at most- and even in the early 70s - home on 3rd day after a section- not checking if you had any help or support at home.

Nearly did not have a second one due to sleep deprivation with first one. With OH working such long hours and often nights on top- he was too knackered to help with baby at night (or during the day for that matter... he found it hard too, in a different way)- thank goodness baby 2 was very different at night and slept through after a late evening feed very quickly. Sleep deprivation can truly cause damage. Yes, so sorry it took you over the edge for a while pancakes x

Last edited by Odile; 19.05.2020 at 17:01.
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