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  #81  
Old 20.12.2020, 21:10
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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True you wouldn't like to smell like Henry Cooper or Barry Sheene after splashing the great smell of Brut all over.

Henry Cooper and Barry Sheene, Great smell of Brut Advert
LOL. He was rubbing it on his nipples!
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  #82  
Old 20.12.2020, 22:41
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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If you find that something is tasteless and difficult to chew, take off your mask and try it again
I was in that exact situation lately. Wasn’t the mask. I could not taste anything. Nada. Zip. I shortly panicked but it turned out to be just tofu...
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  #83  
Old 21.12.2020, 08:39
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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So you're not a Brylcreem man, huh?
A little dab'll do ya!
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  #84  
Old 21.12.2020, 08:51
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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A little dab'll do ya!
That reminds me. Folk in Dubai don't know the Flintstones. But those in Abu Dhabi do.
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  #85  
Old 21.12.2020, 09:18
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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That reminds me. Folk in Dubai don't know the Flintstones. But those in Abu Dhabi do.
That reminded me of another thing, of which I found an analysis and history online.
Still didn't see the version I recall in there, so I've adapted a bit, using stuff from there and my memory ...

"To be or not to be" - Shakespeare
"To be is to do" - Sartre
"To do is to be" - Socrates
"Do be do be do" - Sinatra
"Scooby dooby do!" - Scooby
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  #86  
Old 21.12.2020, 09:53
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

I just heard Chris Rea has turned back.
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  #87  
Old 22.12.2020, 09:32
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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  #88  
Old 22.12.2020, 12:06
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Bet you have to laugh:

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  #89  
Old 22.12.2020, 18:11
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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I just heard Chris Rea has turned back.
I absolutely hate that Driving Home for Christmas song with a vengeance. Back in 2003 I did a Christmas temp job in Marks and Spencer to earn some extra money as I'd not long moved back to Scotland and was in the process of looking for a job. They played the same CD on a loop all day and by the time I'd heard this for about the 40th time I was nearly bursting into tears and wanting to slit my wrists. And don't get me started on having to listen to Slade and Wizzard all day either
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  #90  
Old 24.12.2020, 14:23
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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The problem is that why did the chicken cross the road style jokes are just a bit old fashioned. It's like asking if anyone's got any good embroidery patterns for an antimacassar.

The only reason you're getting any response at all is due to the particular demographics of the EF audience.



It will truly be the apocalypse when humor is considered old fashioned.

Good thing the EF audience demographic is doing it's part to save the soul of humanity.
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  #91  
Old 25.12.2020, 12:52
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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I absolutely hate that Driving Home for Christmas song with a vengeance. Back in 2003 I did a Christmas temp job in Marks and Spencer to earn some extra money as I'd not long moved back to Scotland and was in the process of looking for a job. They played the same CD on a loop all day and by the time I'd heard this for about the 40th time I was nearly bursting into tears and wanting to slit my wrists. And don't get me started on having to listen to Slade and Wizzard all day either
Burn it, burn it with fire.
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  #92  
Old 25.12.2020, 12:53
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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It will truly be the apocalypse when humor is considered old fashioned.

Good thing the EF audience demographic is doing it's part to save the soul of humanity.
Tell that to Bernard Manning...
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  #93  
Old 29.12.2020, 19:09
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Strange but true this year:

What went through all our minds in 2020, the year when we all started to fear having a cold, namely is this cough due
to a bad cold or could it be Covid-19.
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  #94  
Old 30.12.2020, 23:24
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Can some one explain this joke?
I tried it and did not taste any difference.

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  #95  
Old 01.01.2021, 13:23
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Remember back when we used to eat cake after someone blew all over it trying to blow out the candles?

We really used to live so wild.
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  #96  
Old 01.01.2021, 13:24
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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Can some one explain this joke?
I tried it and did not taste any difference.



Thanks for the contribution. I'm not sure whether to groan or thanks you.
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  #97  
Old 01.01.2021, 13:27
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Ten years from now, you'll put on a jacket and find a mask in the pocket.

"Oh man, what a weird year that was," you'll chuckle to yourself.

Then you'll pick up your machete and continue across the wasteland, keeping to the shadows to avoid the roving gangs of cannibal raiders.
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  #98  
Old 01.01.2021, 14:34
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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Ten years from now, you'll put on a jacket and find a mask in the pocket.

"Oh man, what a weird year that was," you'll chuckle to yourself.

Then you'll pick up your machete and continue across the wasteland, keeping to the shadows to avoid the roving gangs of cannibal raiders.
...on your relentless search for toilet paper.
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  #99  
Old 01.01.2021, 23:48
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

1. The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.

2. 2019: Stay away from negative people. - 2020: Stay away from positive people.

3. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house & their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!

4. This morning I saw a neighbour talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I came into my house & told my cat. We laughed a lot.

5. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

6. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?

7. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars & keep men at home!

8. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!

9. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

10. Appropriate analogy. "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” is like saying “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now.”

11 The spread of COVID-19 is based on 2 things:
How dense the population is
How dense the population is

12. I will stay up late this New Year’s Eve. Not to see 2021 come in, but to be sure 2020 leaves !
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  #100  
Old 08.01.2021, 15:54
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

.


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