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  #121  
Old 02.03.2021, 16:49
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

I got the AZ vaccination a few days ago. No real side-effects, except I no longer get lost driving around London.
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  #122  
Old 02.03.2021, 17:54
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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That man is a TP hoarder! Off with his head.
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  #123  
Old 19.03.2021, 09:14
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Q: How did the doctors know Dracula had Covid?

A: Because of his coffin

Get it?
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  #124  
Old 19.03.2021, 09:40
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Best joke I've heard recently.

"Everybody who wishes to receive a vaccine will have one by summer"
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  #125  
Old 19.03.2021, 14:15
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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Best joke I've heard recently.

"Everybody who wishes to receive a vaccine will have one by summer"
If enough people get scared off completely by the AZ news, that might work.
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  #126  
Old 19.03.2021, 15:22
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Working from home
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  #127  
Old 19.03.2021, 15:23
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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Working from home
They had time to redo their whole kitchen and stuck with white? Ha
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  #128  
Old 24.03.2021, 10:25
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

As you know holidays abroad are banned in the UK during the current climate and therefore
anyone leaving the UK has to fill in a 'reason for International travel' form available for download
from Gov.uk before flying from the UK.

You can imagine the 'reason for International travel' form has been open to ridicule on
social media, ever since they became available with some being framed as talking pieces
for peoples kitchens, alongside other british classic government posters of the past, like
Keep Calm and Carry On and Protect & Survive.




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Surely the time has come for Boris to 'circle the wagons' for a bit of herd immunity ?

Last edited by John William; 24.03.2021 at 10:36.
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  #129  
Old 31.03.2021, 17:51
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Dear tenants,

We recommend washing your hands not for 30 seconds, but for a minimum of 15 minutes.

The plumber
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  #130  
Old 31.03.2021, 19:39
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

I'll be glad when the barber reopens. Just three months and my hair weighs 10kig more.

The scales don't lie.
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  #131  
Old 15.04.2021, 00:01
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes



If you wear your mask like this ....
.... you might as well wear your underpants like this ....
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  #132  
Old 15.04.2021, 00:07
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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  #133  
Old 26.04.2021, 18:15
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

At last Shops, pubs, gyms, cafe's and restaurants reopen in Scotland after a 4 month lockdown.

BBC News Scotland - Shops reopen after lockdown


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  #134  
Old 27.04.2021, 07:39
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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  #135  
Old 27.04.2021, 09:00
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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There aren't any funny corona-virus jokes.

All the corona-virus jokes I've seen are tasteless.

Tasteless? Careful, that's one of the symptoms.
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  #136  
Old 27.04.2021, 12:44
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

If you can't taste and smell your food, that might be because you're still wearing your mask.
If you've removed your mask, and the stuff you're putting in your mouth still tastes like a mask, it might be that you're eating tofu.
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  #137  
Old 27.04.2021, 12:53
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

Why was the Vegan upset?

He wasn't getting his own whey
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  #138  
Old 27.04.2021, 13:37
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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Why was the Vegan upset?

He wasn't getting his own whey
That's the best Coronavirus joke I have ever seen. So poignant.
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  #139  
Old 29.04.2021, 06:09
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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  #140  
Old 29.04.2021, 07:01
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Re: Coronavirus Jokes

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If you can't taste and smell your food, that might be because you're still wearing your mask.
If you've removed your mask, and the stuff you're putting in your mouth still tastes like a mask, it might be that you're eating tofu.
Yeah, like, ummm! Elbow deep in a machine at a customers, took a swig of coffee and forgot the bloody mask...
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