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Old 27.10.2010, 20:19
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Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

Would you be a member? IMHO an area where Switzerland is way ahead.
Still young(ish) and in good health, I find it quite reassuring to know, that should really bad luck knock at my door, I'll be allowed to make a dignified exit.
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Old 27.10.2010, 20:22
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Re: Exit ?

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I'll be allowed to make a dignified exit.
But how dignified is it?
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Old 27.10.2010, 20:23
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Re: Exit ?

You don't die with dignity you live with it.

I'm quite glad the option exists here. Kind of a plan Z.
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Old 27.10.2010, 20:38
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Re: Exit ?

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But how dignified is it?
In many cases an awful lot more dignified than the alternative. EXIT is very different to Dignitas.
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Old 27.10.2010, 20:40
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

I think having a choice is a good thing. I cannot bear the thought of being in an old peoples home, totally reliant on the moods and whims of staff. I'd rather leave in my own time.
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Old 27.10.2010, 20:49
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

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I think having a choice is a good thing. I cannot bear the thought of being in an old peoples home, totally reliant on the moods and whims of staff. I'd rather leave in my own time.
I often remind my father to be nice to his children. They will afterall choose his nursing home.
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Old 28.10.2010, 09:32
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

We have (unfortunately) had a very close expericene with Exit. For what it is worth, I would highly recommend it. Very professional, very caring, and good service (if you can call it that). If you are thinking of these things, of course please investigate fully. Compared to other similar services, Exit, is the one I would choose if I go that route. Be aware that you have to be a member for about 2 years (please verify, this is from memory), membership fees are quite low, and its best to have all your paperwork and wishes in order. After our experience with Exit, close family members are considering membership at the moment.
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Old 28.10.2010, 09:47
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

I think what it boils down to it that when you know that you are going to die a horrible death, do you want yours and your loved ones memories of the last 6 months to a year to be of you laying in a hospital bed in bubbling agony, or to be able to slip away quietly and peacefully, and allow them to grieve and remember you pretty much as you were. Same as with if you find you are suffering from Alzheimers and aware that you will gradually lose your mind, essentially turning into a vegetable who won't recognise your own family, and yet with the realization that you will still live for years being a complete burden on them. Why would anyone want that?

Obviously your view on assisted suicide will vary depending on your ethical and religious views, but personally I think the choice should be there for people to make, just as with (and im not directly comparing it) abortion.
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Old 28.10.2010, 10:09
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

Thankfully we still have a choice, a burden to my children?
Well I fed and watered them and changed nappies for years on all three of the buggers, the least I can expect is for them to look after me in a fitting way and not hold a children's court and coming to the verdict that granddad has to off himself.
Don't get me wrong the last thing that I want is to end my days as a sad and pathetic shadow of myself, I would rather go in a blaze of glory.
But on the other hand I don't want my kids to come up one day saying: "We had a talk and dad you are 107 don't you think it is time!"
Hope dies last, barring illness like Alzheimer's I can fully expect to have a working thinking mind in a body that is slowly shutting down, cell by frikking cell, right until the very end.
Then I want a pretty nurse holding my hand and getting a telephone call from the bank: "Mr. Slammer your account is 50 Chuff's overdrawn.

As one poster remarked: "Death is not dignified but life is"
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:02
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

Personally, i have had to watch a close family member, die slowly and in lots of pain, with no chance of recovery. If this option had been available in the UK , then he would have taken it. If i ever end up in that situation , then I would most certainly take the option.

If we have a sick animal/pet cat/dog who is in this condition, then as much as it pains us to let them go , we do the right thing and have them put out of their misery.. so why not let human beings have same the free choice. ?
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:11
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

I've watched two people I love dearly die exceedingly slow and painful deaths (both with cancer). And I've seen another drop dead from a heart attack.

And if (after all other avenues have been exhausted) I'm going to make a slow and painful exit; I'd definitely look into leaving on my own terms after putting all my affairs in order and saying goodbye to those I love.
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:13
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

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Personally, i have had to watch a close family member, die slowly and in lots of pain, with no chance of recovery. If this option had been available in the UK , then he would have taken it. If i ever end up in that situation , then I would most certainly take the option.

If we have a sick animal/pet cat/dog who is in this condition, then as much as it pains us to let them go , we do the right thing and have them put out of their misery.. so why not let human beings have same the free choice. ?
Delicate question and please don't get it wrong.
But are you sure that that is what your family member wanted or are you projecting your own anguish.
Personally I think that going through something like that (and I have, not just once) hammers home the fact that you yourself, just at that moment, wants the persons pain to end.
Compassion, that is what defines us as a species, but could we be wrong in how we applicate it?
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:19
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

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You don't die with dignity you live with it.

I'm quite glad the option exists here. Kind of a plan Z.
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I think having a choice is a good thing. I cannot bear the thought of being in an old peoples home, totally reliant on the moods and whims of staff. I'd rather leave in my own time.
I think having the "choice" is important.

By having the option available, those who strongly oppose it, can simply choose 'not' too.

I have also known people in this situation, and after lengthy discussions, I can say that I fully understand and would do the same in their position.

It is wrong to rob people of the option of ending their life in dignity and free from pain.

Nelly....... plan Z is also spot on.
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:20
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

Yes im sure its what my Father wanted.. and NO im not projecting my own anguish... he wanted the pain to end, I wanted the pain to end, as did all of my family.. the compassion helps us to understand the pain the sufferer is going through, and our strength helps us to decide what is right. He was attatched to a morphine drip to help with the pain, and there were so many times when it would have been so easy to increase the dosage and end his pain, he wanted this , and i couldnt do it , i couldnt end his pain for him, not only because of the legal implications but also because I didnt want him to die despite the pain he was in, I didnt want to loose him.

As i said, if i was in this position then i would want to take this step myself. If only to spare my family the same pain again.





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Delicate question and please don't get it wrong.
But are you sure that that is what your family member wanted or are you projecting your own anguish.
Personally I think that going through something like that (and I have, not just once) hammers home the fact that you yourself, just at that moment, wants the persons pain to end.
Compassion, that is what defines us as a species, but could we be wrong in how we applicate it?
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:21
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

and just a note, maybe you should watch this video.

http://vimeo.com/8191217

be warned it is very emotive and it will make you cry...
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:27
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

having watched a close friends dad very very slowly and painfully die of motor neurone disease I'd say its a good thing to have the choice, the poor sod lasted for quite a few years passed the 'average' expected lifespan and begged anyone who visited to kill him, he made a couple of attempts himself but just didn't have enough strength or coordination to pull it off. His actual cause of death in the end was extremely unpleasant.
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:37
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

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Yes im sure its what my Father wanted.. and NO im not projecting my own anguish... he wanted the pain to end, I wanted the pain to end, as did all of my family.. the compassion helps us to understand the pain the sufferer is going through, and our strength helps us to decide what is right. He was attatched to a morphine drip to help with the pain, and there were so many times when it would have been so easy to increase the dosage and end his pain, he wanted this , and i couldnt do it , i couldnt end his pain for him, not only because of the legal implications but also because I didnt want him to die despite the pain he was in, I didnt want to loose him.

As i said, if i was in this position then i would want to take this step myself. If only to spare my family the same pain again.
Like I said I was not trying to wind you up, the higher functions of my fathers brain were gone after a massive aneurysm and his body was writhing in.. I don't know.
The doctor asked me if I wanted the jerking to stop, he took my hands and made it clear, without saying a word but it was very clear and very important that I understood.
He stopped jerking when we went for a coffee.

Did I do the right thing???????? I will never know.
Sad now.
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:39
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

If it came to this I like the idea of being able to have a proper 'goodbye' and people not worrying about getting a phone call one night saying I'd had an agonising death.

I've watched 2 family members deteriorate with illness and the prolonged agony was just awful for everyone. Knowing that death is ever-closer and people are just waiting for it to happen...it's terrible.

In this case maybe Switzerland have the right idea. It should be a choice.
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Old 28.10.2010, 11:41
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

im not wound up at all, and yes you did what you felt was right at the time. Be happy he lived, and not sad that hes gone. :-)

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Like I said I was not trying to wind you up, the higher functions of my fathers brain were gone after a massive aneurysm and his body was writhing in.. I don't know.
The doctor asked me if I wanted the jerking to stop, he took my hands and made it clear, without saying a word but it was very clear and very important that I understood.
He stopped jerking when we went for a coffee.

Did I do the right thing???????? I will never know.
Sad now.
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Old 28.10.2010, 12:05
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Re: Exit ? [Assisted Suicide]

I am very much torn on this issue, having seen both sides.

One grandmother lived for 10 awful years with Alzheimer's, unable to do anything at all. When she first was diagnosed, she said she didn't want to end her life that way, signed a DNR order and made a living will. But as she remained physically healthy long after her mind went, there was no option other than to continue to the bitter end. I know this was not what she wanted, and it was heartbreaking.

But my other grandmother's case cast the issue in a different light. At 98, - sharp as a tack, still running mental rings around many folk a quarter her age - she needed surgery. The hospital staff put a great deal of pressure on us to sign a DNR order. The doctor kept saying 'she'd had a good run, what quality of life can one have at her age should the operation not go well'? (Knowing my fiesty grandmother, a very good one.)

It very much bothered me that a 30-something doctor who didn't know my grandmother was projecting his ideas on the value of a 98 year old woman's life. My grandmother always said that she wanted to hang on until the last possible minute before shuffling off this mortal coil, hence she refused to sign a DNR - yet here was her doctor, pressuring the family to do otherwise, making us feel that we were being selfish by adhering to Gram's wishes.

I honestly do not know how I will feel when my turn comes. Yes, I think the choice needs to be available - but I do want to ensure it really is the person's choice - and no one else's - either way.
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