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Old 29.03.2011, 11:42
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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Please before to assume it is in their heads, read more about it. Look at the other link I provided yesterday!

I got myself to many doctors telling me my illness was in my head until a doctor finally got to put his finger out of his nose and did proper research.

Sadly, in this situation, women's health is always in second plan in research when it comes to inexplicable symptoms.
1. Agree - sometimes proper research is not done because doctors think women are hysterical, because they (the doctors) don't know better, haven't seen that illness before etc. etc.

2. Women having TL are usually not in their 20ies but more likely late 30ies or 40ies when they have it done, because that's when you think you've had all the kids you needed.

3. At exactly that age (starting at around 35) your natural fertility starts to decline, your hormone level changes, which leads to (among other things) insomnia, irregular periods, stronger periods, heat flashes, thinning hair, mood swings, osteoporosis......

4. It is very possible these women had the symptoms after their TL, but it doesn't mean they are necessarily related to it.
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Old 29.03.2011, 12:10
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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But Nil, what do you feel comfortable with ?

The reason I mentioned that it's a good idea to select a reversible option, is that there is a psychological impact when you can no longer have children (whether it's because a deliberate choice, as discussed here, has been made or because a medical condition has taken away the possibility).

It's not as light as one may perhaps think.
You do feel the change.
I still think that in the current context of the second pregnancy, you are looking at effectively a STERILIZATION option (preferably for hubby as I read) rather than an option that would give you protection and peace of mind for a period of time so a decision can be taken at a later date when any issues about the second pregnancy are far behind you.

Have a look at Wiki. A vasectomy is reversible in about 50% to maybe 70% of the cases and at great expense. If you need to/want to reverse it, those are not good odds. There are also some less than good side-effects in 1 in 10 to 1 in 30 of cases.

One example of how things could change in the future (and let's not attack me on moral or other grounds). Assume number two baby is born with a genetic disease that can only be cured by "making" a designer baby number three. This is well within the technology that exists today. And you two have "shut down the factory". My guess is the two of you will be having some remorse about the decision that was taken "in the heat of the moment". Especially if it includes the premature death of number two.

All I am proposing is the IUD option that gives you both some time/space to review the situation at a future date where you might come to the same decision but at least it will not be tied into the emotional moment of a new baby on the way.

Good luck in any event.
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Old 29.03.2011, 12:18
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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1. Agree - sometimes proper research is not done because doctors think women are hysterical, because they (the doctors) don't know better, haven't seen that illness before etc. etc.

2. Women having TL are usually not in their 20ies but more likely late 30ies or 40ies when they have it done, because that's when you think you've had all the kids you needed.

3. At exactly that age (starting at around 35) your natural fertility starts to decline, your hormone level changes, which leads to (among other things) insomnia, irregular periods, stronger periods, heat flashes, thinning hair, mood swings, osteoporosis......

4. It is very possible these women had the symptoms after their TL, but it doesn't mean they are necessarily related to it.
1-2-3-4 all true!

About number 4, some women who had the kids in a very young age and went trought the TL are also in the amount of women who got the TL syndrome. Not a bunch of exemples but enough to ring the red flag to me!
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Old 29.03.2011, 12:23
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

I definitely think it's a good idea to wait a year or two after the birth of your last child before getting sterilised. Not because of concerns about a "replacement" or "spare part" child, which I'll attack on the grounds of sheer unlikeliness, but simply that if you are going to go for a third, you're more likely to decide to do that sooner than later. I had my snip three years after the birth of my youngest daughter.

On those grounds - I think you'd be well advised to not have a TL during the ceasarean.

Btw, for the IUD fans. My mother's IUD was found embedded in the placenta when I was born...
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Old 29.03.2011, 13:47
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

At the hospital where my sister works as a midwife they have a policy of not carrying out TL surgery during a C-Section. They will only do it after the youngest child has reached 1 year old to make sure the decision is not influenced by the current pregnancy.

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I definitely think it's a good idea to wait a year or two after the birth of your last child before getting sterilised. Not because of concerns about a "replacement" or "spare part" child, which I'll attack on the grounds of sheer unlikeliness, but simply that if you are going to go for a third, you're more likely to decide to do that sooner than later. I had my snip three years after the birth of my youngest daughter.

On those grounds - I think you'd be well advised to not have a TL during the ceasarean.

Btw, for the IUD fans. My mother's IUD was found embedded in the placenta when I was born...
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Old 29.03.2011, 13:56
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

Vasectomy is certainly the easier way in the sense that the op is not complicated. On the other hand, if I decided I didn't want any more kids I would have the TL. You never know what happens and if your partner finds someone new ( which we all neither hope nor expect) he would still have the option to have more kids, whereas I wouldn't want any more kids no matter who with.
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Old 29.03.2011, 14:01
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

I think that's a great policy. At the end of your pregnancy you are so tired (especially if you already have other children) and you can't imagine going through it again which can lead to a rash decision that you could regret.
I had mixed feelings about a TL during my whole pregnancy, then in the OR while I was having my C-sec the doctor asked if he should do it and I had about 5 seconds to give him a definitive answer.
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Old 29.03.2011, 14:16
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

A medical professor friend and colleague of one of my siblings specialized in all matters concerning male and female reproduction systems. This is such an interesting topic that I am going to ask them both for their candid views on either procedure the next time we speak or meet.
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Old 29.03.2011, 15:55
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

FWIW I agree with those who have said wait a year (or two), whatever method you decide to go with. While pregnant with and giving birth to our second I was kept going by the thought that I would never, ever have to do this again. But by the month after the birth I was seriously miserable at the thought that I would never get to have another tiny baby again (yes ok, post-partum hormones to some extent but still). I was glad - and am glad - that we didn't do anything rash right then!
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Old 29.03.2011, 16:02
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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I definitely think it's a good idea to wait a year or two after the birth of your last child before getting sterilised. Not because of concerns about a "replacement" or "spare part" child, which I'll attack on the grounds of sheer unlikeliness, but simply that if you are going to go for a third, you're more likely to decide to do that sooner than later. I had my snip three years after the birth of my youngest daughter.

On those grounds - I think you'd be well advised to not have a TL during the ceasarean.

Btw, for the IUD fans. My mother's IUD was found embedded in the placenta when I was born...
I got pregnant with an IUD in Situ. They say it is rare so they told me to wait that I couldn't possibly be pregnant, four months later they confirmed the pregnancy. Later I treid again with an IUD- After two months heavy blood loss it had to be removed.
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Old 29.03.2011, 17:03
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy



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  #72  
Old 30.03.2011, 00:06
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

Hoi Nil! ..... Mr Nil can have some sperm frozen and stored for the future, in case you guys change your mind and want to raise a "team" of players!... or add just another weeny to the nest..? Just an option to consider.....
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Old 30.03.2011, 09:11
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

Just don't have Mr Nil go for the budget option. (Possibly NSFW).
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Old 30.03.2011, 10:33
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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Just don't have Mr Nil go for the budget option. (Possibly NSFW).
Awah!

I want to bring something under the light here.

I find it quite disturbing what I read earlier about keeping options open in case the second child dies or has a genetic desease...

Am I the only one who find it just plain wrong?

When I got my first child, I didn't want to go for a second one. Because I hate to be pregnant (with great passion) and because I had a very bad labor experience. But I didn't take actions to not have an other one in case my feelings change. I decided to go for a second one knowing all those months of discomfort (if not pure torture) that were coming.

But even before to be pregnant again, I knew it would be the very last time ever that I would be pregnant. It is not feelings coming from my hormones and tireness of the pregnancy. I did it twice and that's it. If we want a third one (probably when we begin to have 4 thursdays in a week) we will go for adoption. Because I have a strong feeling for it and I always wanted to adopt.

People assume that someone can change his/her mind. Yes, maybe. About if I want a sandwich instead of pizza and I change my mind about it. But am I going to change my mind about being pregnant again? Nope, nope and nope. I am sure about it as much as I know my name, my kids names, etc...

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Old 30.03.2011, 11:57
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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...
Am I the only one who find it just plain wrong?
...
No, I found it wrong as well.
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Old 30.03.2011, 17:30
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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I want to bring something under the light here.

I find it quite disturbing what I read earlier about keeping options open in case the second child dies or has a genetic desease...

Am I the only one who find it just plain wrong?
Don't know... however we waiting a while before doing anything just in case there was an issues - be it a disease or SIDS or whatever as we knew we didn't want an only child... however you can't wait all your life for that as sometimes things happen that are out of your control...

However we felt a certain waiting period was the smart thing to do and we put thought into all the "nasty" things that could happen as weighed up when we thought it was safe to proceed as we were thinking of it as more a "we won't be turning back from this decision" point in time.....

but to each their own...
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Old 30.03.2011, 17:42
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

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Don't know... however we waiting a while before doing anything just in case there was an issues - be it a disease or SIDS or whatever as we knew we didn't want an only child... however you can't wait all your life for that as sometimes things happen that are out of your control...

However we felt a certain waiting period was the smart thing to do and we put thought into all the "nasty" things that could happen as weighed up when we thought it was safe to proceed as we were thinking of it as more a "we won't be turning back from this decision" point in time.....

but to each their own...
A friend of mine did the waiting period... more out of laziness to get the thing done. They were too busy with their two kids and time passed. They didn't want any other kids for sure. But shit happened and she felt pregnant again... Wasn't happy at all. She got a very hard time to come over the idea. I am sure they are very happy to have the little extra one but it was very difficult. She felt trapped and very frustrated about it.

Back then, she wished she had have it done because she wasn't ready nor interested to have an other one. They are great and loving parents so the last one is as loved as the others.
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Old 28.04.2011, 15:03
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Vasectomy

Vasectomy is easier, far less invasive, pre-surgery visit is refunded by medical insurance and surgery 600 CHF in Bern , can be refunded if prescribed by gyne. Surgery is far cheaper in London, and only 50$ in India (Some places they give you a free lunch).
In France, still considered as a genital self mutilation... but they are French.

As it is most time irreversible, it could be adviseable that Mr saves a few gametes in a sperm bank. Just in case... Madame and Mr might change their stance on having more children or even divorce (Hope not and for some of us , hope yes) after a while.

best

Last edited by GAILLARD; 28.04.2011 at 15:04. Reason: typos
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Old 05.10.2011, 13:24
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy: My Vasectomy Experience

I only just saw this thread now.

I had been meaning to write something about my own Vasectomy Experience for ages, but it's hard to do. Here's why

Read this:

I lost 1 testicle in Switzerland after multiple repeated chronic infections after what I believe was a bodged Vasectomy

Effects:

  • I had 4 full surgeries and many minor ones.
  • Open wound deep enough to take 2 Handys
  • 150+ days off work
  • 125 Spitex home visits
  • I am still suffering.

It was done at xxxx in November 2007 by the well-known and highly respected Dr. xxxxx.

I name him now because when I had the temerity to write to him and ask for an explanation of what he did that day, he charged me 35 CHF for his reply. Money is important to him. Patients are not.

I will write up the full-story one day here, but am still in many ways rebuilding my life.

The SPO - Swiss Patient Organisation www.spo.ch - told me "it can happen (infection after Vasectomy) and you're lucky you didn't lose both"
That was their Special Advisor, a former Doctor.

I have learnt a lot about the Medical Profession in the past 4 years and in my opinion, they will never admit to making mistakes.

It's deeply engrained in their Culture.

Unlike the industry I work in - Air Transport, where we have professionals who are tested every 6 months in emergency situations (They're called Pilots) and whose every spoken word and every control input on the aircraft is recorded during their time in the Office (it's called the Cockpit). There's even anonymous websites where any breach of safety can be reported e.g. www.chirp.co.uk.

I feel safe in the air - I'm with professionals.
On the ground, that's where I worry...

Sexually - I have changed and become quite an animal. I can't perform like before, but I have a lot of toys. I almost feel like it's my Duty after going through so much to try as many new and different things.

OK, that's quite enough for a lunchtime
PS. If the Mods want to remove the name of the Doctor or Spital, that's fine, but please don't delete the whole post. I've been through a lot!
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Last edited by Castro; 05.10.2011 at 14:06. Reason: As you noted, you cannot publish the doctor's name or place of work.
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Old 05.10.2011, 13:29
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Re: Tubal Ligation VS Vasectomy

For my file - and maybe yours, I wrote some of my story here.

In Sequence

Urologist wanted [Zurich area for second opinion]

What happens when a Routine Operation goes wrong?

Chronic Infection after Surgery - whip the Testicle off

And then I've not written about it until today.
It's approaching the 4 Year Anniversary...
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