Go Back   English Forum Switzerland > Help & tips > Family matters/health  
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #41  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:11
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Zurich Unterland
Posts: 3,315
Groaned at 145 Times in 99 Posts
Thanked 4,850 Times in 1,930 Posts
smoky has a reputation beyond reputesmoky has a reputation beyond reputesmoky has a reputation beyond reputesmoky has a reputation beyond reputesmoky has a reputation beyond reputesmoky has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Interesting thread.

Reminds me of a little occurence last weekend.

I attended a sports match, and the toilets were in a school building far removed from the sports grounds.

I went in search of them. No signs. No pedestrians. Just an empty school with a maze of pathways.

So I asked two little girls (the only folk around) walking down one of the pathways, if they knew where the toilets were.

Yes, they did. And they took me to the correct building.

The scary part - for those kids - the one, aged about 6 or 7yrs, seemed to feel obliged to show me right into the building, which was an underground area with a maze of long dark passages. She showed me right to the door of the "Ladies toilets".

I am just an ordinary old granny type .... but .....I could have been ... like a case in SA a few years ago ..... one of those old ladies seeking out little children to procure for a paedophile partner/gang .....?

At the time I was just bursting for that elusive toilet ..... otherwise I would have attempted to find their parents and warn them to warn their kids to not trust strangers .... and especially to not enter empty buildings with them!
Reply With Quote
  #42  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:34
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
View Post
I hope you do not think I was implying this in my earlier posts in this thread. I have repeatedly discussed the dangers of strangers with my child. What I would like is for the school to step up and share in this responsibility especially when they have information regarding current dangers and/or have the opportunity to discuss such issues when, for example, the local policeman is visiting the school.

I also do not entirely agree that here in CH, parents are expected to take on a "very serious" role in raising children. Indeed, as a parent, I often struggle to not feel myself excluded from the usual duties I would associate with raising my child - such as accompanying him to and from school until a later age than is expected here, such as assisting with homework (we are persistently told not to even check that our child has done his homework) such as supporting the messages given to him at school (on issues such as bullying, road traffic awareness etc). In my mind, once my child goes to school, the job of guiding them through adulthood is partly (and only partly) shared with the school, but all too often I feel myself excluded from everything that goes on during school hours and not welcome if I try to assist (eg with school trips).

I just have to accept that there is a different culture towards responsibility not just of the child, but also for the child.

Many posts on this thread have demonstrated that this is not a country wide thing and many parents are reporting really sensible initiatives being taken by the schools particularly in regard to the subject of this thread. But no sane, thinking parent would EVER think that responsibility for their child's safety resided solely with the school.
Are you the parent or a child? Why do you have to go on school trips? Why during school hours? Your job as a parent is not only during "school hours" I'm sure you are aware of that. Switzerland is not into "pushy, aggressive parents" who are trying to control their program. You have to be more sensible...
Reply With Quote
This user groans at for this post:
  #43  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:36
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
Switzerland is not into "pushy, aggressive parents blah blah blah
What? All of Switzerland? You feel empowered to make such a sweeping statement about every canton in the federation, do you?

How about reading what ecb actually wrote, instead of what you imagine she wrote?
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank for this useful post:
  #44  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:40
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
Are you the parent or a child? Why do you have to go on school trips? Why during school hours? Your job as a parent is not only during "school hours" I'm sure you are aware of that. Switzerland is not into "pushy, aggressive parents" who are trying to control their program. You have to be more sensible...
Sorry but I don't think ecb is either pushy or aggressive. She is just a parent taking an interest in her child's schooling and welfare.

I think schools welcome these kinds of parents more than the sort that dump the kid and run, expecting the teacher to solely deal with discipline, social skills and all the other stuff that parents should be dealing with.

ecb made a point that it should be handled jointly with the school and at the moment that's not how it is in her child's case.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank for this useful post:
  #45  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:40
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
View Post
Wish you were right but you are not. Ylenia Lenhard was kidnapped in July 2007, apparently in just such a way.

(I'm kind of surprised you don't know about this, it was in all the papers at the time and was also the case that inspired some Swiss groups - Swiss groups, mind you, not these pesky over-hyping non-integrating foreign types - to call for the introduction of an "Amber Alert"-type system.)

Let's be sensible, not be paranoid, I agree - but claiming that "it doesn't happen here" is neither true nor responsible.
O.K. four years ago, a very, very rare occurance...people want to act like it's every week or so. Up until now, Switzerland is still quite safe for "responsible, not overly emotional-parents." It's heartbreaking regardless where it happens though...
Reply With Quote
  #46  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:46
ecb's Avatar
ecb ecb is offline
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: out n about - it's summer!
Posts: 2,200
Groaned at 8 Times in 8 Posts
Thanked 3,567 Times in 1,323 Posts
ecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
Switzerland is not into "pushy, aggressive parents" who are trying to control their program. ...
Do you know, particularly with regard to my second child who has learning difficulties I wish I was a pushy aggressive parent....

But actually my point is not to be a "hands off its their problem" parent nor to be a "pushy agressive parent". There is a happy medium. Our village school and the people who work there do an admirable job and and as a parent of a school child, I want to support what they are trying to achieve as much as I can.
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank ecb for this useful post:
  #47  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:46
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

So let's get this straight: the Swiss are not hysterical parents. The Americans and British are hysterical parents. Black people like fried chicken and watermelon. Chinese people are inscrutable. Jews are avaricious and untrustworthy.

Have I got that right, PJ?
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank for this useful post:
  #48  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:55
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Point well made DB. And yet- there IS a difference in culture. Parents in the UK are more likely to take a direct involvement in school activities, even attend classes to support, read with kids, join with trips and out of school activities, etc. Parents AND teachers expect this as the norm. In CH, parents still have the 'old fashioned attitude' that 'teacher knows best' and has to be let to get on with it, not interfere. Pros and cons, as always but the difference is there.
Reply With Quote
  #49  
Old 01.09.2011, 18:57
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
In CH, parents still have the 'old fashioned attitude' that 'teacher knows best' and has to be let to get on with it, not interfere.
My experience has been the complete opposite of this.

Swiss parents can be - are, in fact - just as eager to get involved in their children's education as their Anglo-Saxon counterparts.

Stereotypes are still stereotypes, even when supposedly positive in nature.
Reply With Quote
  #50  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:00
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
View Post
Do you know, particularly with regard to my second child who has learning difficulties I wish I was a pushy aggressive parent....

But actually my point is not to be a "hands off its their problem" parent nor to be a "pushy agressive parent". There is a happy medium. Our village school and the people who work there do an admirable job and and as a parent of a school child, I want to support what they are trying to achieve as much as I can.
I don't think you really wish you were a "pushy, aggressive parent" especially with a special needs child. They have "special needs" and one of them is not an over-bearing parent. Good you have found a happy medium...

Quote:
So let's get this straight: the Swiss are not hysterical parents. The Americans and British are hysterical parents. Black people like fried chicken and watermelon. Chinese people are inscrutable. Jews are avaricious and untrustworthy.

Have I got that right, PJ?
Tell us how you "really" feel DB...Those are your thoughts not mine.
Reply With Quote
  #51  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:02
MathNut's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Kt. Glarus
Posts: 4,415
Groaned at 34 Times in 32 Posts
Thanked 10,952 Times in 3,253 Posts
MathNut has a reputation beyond reputeMathNut has a reputation beyond reputeMathNut has a reputation beyond reputeMathNut has a reputation beyond reputeMathNut has a reputation beyond reputeMathNut has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
O.K. four years ago, a very, very rare occurance...people want to act like it's every week or so. Up until now, Switzerland is still quite safe for "responsible, not overly emotional-parents." It's heartbreaking regardless where it happens though...
Right... I'm glad we can all differentiate between "very, very rare" and "does not happen here because Swiss kids are so much smarter."

FWIW abduction by a stranger is a very, very rare occurrence in the US as well.
Reply With Quote
  #52  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:02
caz's Avatar
caz caz is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Tuggen SZ
Posts: 253
Groaned at 1 Time in 1 Post
Thanked 241 Times in 100 Posts
caz has an excellent reputationcaz has an excellent reputationcaz has an excellent reputationcaz has an excellent reputation
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Oh no - I am therefore a hysterical parent
seriously though folks I think most of us agree- kids need to be aware of safety and parents and teachers and community police officers are the best sources of this education in whatever form.

Interestingly the comments about not being involved in the schoolkids life piqued my interest as this was the opposite view of my eldest child's second class teacher. He quoted articles saying that we as parents were the best partner for the teacher, we needed to have a good relationship with the school and know what was going on as we had 80% of the influence on our children at 7 years old. His point was that whatever he did in class at this stage we were still the very very dominant affectors in our child's life.

Anyone who has heard a child making derogatory remarks about any number of things will probably have looked to the parents for the source

DB thanks for the name of that course - I will mention it to the teachers and see if they have any plans to use it (no doubt budgets come into it - we are a small gemeinde)

Anyone reading this thread and worrying about what to do I would like to recommend a book - it is quite Americanised but this British family managed to translate and understand it The Berestain Bears Talk about Strangers. Talks in a way that is easy to understand and discuss afterwards.

The other issues about now knowing what is going on just goes back to reading the local papers - a struggle when you don't read German but in any country I think you would get more info from the local paper than from the school. I am very nosy so i also read /www.polizeibericht.ch/ and you can just look at your area and see what is going on.

Caz
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank caz for this useful post:
  #53  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:02
ecb's Avatar
ecb ecb is offline
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: out n about - it's summer!
Posts: 2,200
Groaned at 8 Times in 8 Posts
Thanked 3,567 Times in 1,323 Posts
ecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
Point well made DB. And yet- there IS a difference in culture. Parents in the UK are more likely to take a direct involvement in school activities, even attend classes to support, read with kids, join with trips and out of school activities, etc. Parents AND teachers expect this as the norm. In CH, parents still have the 'old fashioned attitude' that 'teacher knows best' and has to be let to get on with it, not interfere. Pros and cons, as always but the difference is there.
I recognise this difference in approach Odile from my experiences but would add two comments - often parents are required to participate in UK schools due to a simple lack of resources ... when, for example, you teach a group of 40 5 year olds to read with only a teaching assistant as help, it is practically impossible to not require parents to come to school to hear children read. My second point is that here in CH, from the experience I have with my son's teachers, I sense they would be happy for parents to step up their involvement, but are reluctant to require it, as (as I witnessed at last years parent meeting) they are met with complaints from the parents about "being expected to do the school's job".

It is a difficult difficult life being a teacher
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank ecb for this useful post:
  #54  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:03
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
Tell us how you "really" feel DB...Those are your thoughts not mine.
Now you know how ecb feels when you respond to her posts.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank for this useful post:
  #55  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:05
ecb's Avatar
ecb ecb is offline
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: out n about - it's summer!
Posts: 2,200
Groaned at 8 Times in 8 Posts
Thanked 3,567 Times in 1,323 Posts
ecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond reputeecb has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
I don't think you really wish you were a "pushy, aggressive parent" especially with a special needs child. They have "special needs" and one of them is not an over-bearing parent. Good you have found a happy medium...
Obviously not pushy and aggressive with regard to my child ... but pushy and aggressive with regard to the treatment he sometimes receives .. oh yes!

As you say, a happy medium ....
Reply With Quote
  #56  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:06
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

As you know DB I taught for a long time in several UK schools, and my kids went to school there too. Parents were forever invited to come in, join in, help out, support. In my last school, adults and parents actually joined us in classes, learning and taking exams with the kids. Unheard of in CH.

I am involved with many schools in the area and have Swiss friends who live all over CH - (and perhaps they are not representative of CH overall- but the patterns are clear from where I stand from), and they all take the kids to school and withdraw. Schools and teachers in CH generally do NOT ask and encourage parent involvement. Not a stereotype, but just plain fact.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank for this useful post:
  #57  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:10
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
Not a stereotype, but just plain fact.
If you say so.
Reply With Quote
  #58  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:10
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
View Post
Right... I'm glad we can all differentiate between "very, very rare" and "does not happen here because Swiss kids are so much smarter."

FWIW abduction by a stranger is a very, very rare occurrence in the US as well.
No it's not, it's happening every week in the USA. They found a little boy who asked a stranger for directions recently cutup in the strangers freezer. Feet and all. Just last week a gorgeous little girl was abducted found her dead too. The stories are endless and sad too...
Reply With Quote
  #59  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:11
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
View Post
Obviously not pushy and aggressive with regard to my child ... but pushy and aggressive with regard to the treatment he sometimes receives .. oh yes!

As you say, a happy medium ....
From others or from you?
Reply With Quote
  #60  
Old 01.09.2011, 19:11
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Letter from school warning parents about strangers

Quote:
No it's not, it's happening every week in the USA.
What's the population of the United States, again?
Reply With Quote
The following 5 users would like to thank for this useful post:
Reply

Tags
perverts, strangers




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Warning for parents and children near Lausanne Vlh22 Family matters/health 0 03.05.2011 19:20
Any parents sending their children to the Pre-School in Zurich Int School (Baden) cocolua Family matters/health 0 12.04.2011 10:10
Parents Consent for School Field Trips? esto Family matters/health 35 28.04.2010 16:00
TASIS parents' issues with the school bedazzled1 Family matters/health 0 14.03.2009 00:34
[School] Feedback about Bilingual school [Pfäffikon SZ] landmark77 Family matters/health 12 22.02.2008 01:11


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 17:40.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2022, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0