Go Back   English Forum Switzerland > Help & tips > Family matters/health  
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 15.11.2019, 21:44
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2019
Location: Basel
Posts: 36
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
Thanked 13 Times in 5 Posts
justintheexpat has no particular reputation at present
Depression

Hi everyone.

I recently got a new job in Basel. I moved from London! I get depressed because I want a girlfriend and friends but I sit here on weekends all alone cause I’m in this country all by myself. I find myself feeling really isolated and don’t know what to do. I don't speak the local language. Tomorrow is my birthday and I haven’t got anything planned lol!
Reply With Quote
The following 5 users would like to thank justintheexpat for this useful post:
  #2  
Old 15.11.2019, 22:20
NotAllThere's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Baselland
Posts: 12,063
Groaned at 187 Times in 164 Posts
Thanked 17,356 Times in 7,059 Posts
NotAllThere has a reputation beyond reputeNotAllThere has a reputation beyond reputeNotAllThere has a reputation beyond reputeNotAllThere has a reputation beyond reputeNotAllThere has a reputation beyond reputeNotAllThere has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

Follow the link here that I linked to it in response to your first post. Ask there if anyone wants to meet with you and help you celebrate your birthday. Or here. Have you not made contact with anyone in your workplace?

Go to Flannagan's, Paddy Riley's or Pickwick's. Full of people who speak English. That's what I did when I arrived here on my own back in 2002.
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank NotAllThere for this useful post:
  #3  
Old 15.11.2019, 22:29
Sky's Avatar
Sky Sky is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere special far away
Posts: 4,114
Groaned at 53 Times in 39 Posts
Thanked 6,355 Times in 2,426 Posts
Sky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

Hi Justin,
Why not do try something different?
McTavge is organizing / or is part of a Ceilidh Scottish Dancing evening tomorrow in Geneva
https://www.englishforum.ch/entertai...-november.html
You could enjoy a night out 😊
Don’t stay home on your birthday !
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank Sky for this useful post:
  #4  
Old 15.11.2019, 22:50
jacek's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Aargau
Posts: 8,384
Groaned at 109 Times in 84 Posts
Thanked 5,965 Times in 3,359 Posts
jacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond reputejacek has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

Happy birthday for tomorrow. Just have fun by yourself then and spoil yourself rotten in the local pub with both the strangers and locals. Then you will surely make some friends. Things will fall into place then!
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank jacek for this useful post:
  #5  
Old 15.11.2019, 23:29
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Zürich
Posts: 897
Groaned at 84 Times in 66 Posts
Thanked 1,182 Times in 576 Posts
YuropFlyer has a reputation beyond reputeYuropFlyer has a reputation beyond reputeYuropFlyer has a reputation beyond reputeYuropFlyer has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

You aren't going to make friends when sitting home

First - sign up for a language course. That's a GREAT way to integrate and to get known people. I'd suggest Migros Klubschule, but pretty much any program will be better than nothing.

Second - depending on your company, there might be a lot of events/programs to attend, mostly sports - great to get known your coworkers and to find friends within the work environment. If there isn't much at work, check your local community centers, often there are sport activities offered there. Or just head for some swimming, or literally anything that makes you "moving" out of your comfort zone.

Third - as a "quick fix", head for local pubs (as others said already) for a drink is never wrong.

Fourth - take a trip to Zürich, much more international than Basel and easier to make friends here I'll happily have a beer with you tomorrow. On a more serious note, if you like travelling, worth to get a Half Fare card or even a GA (all travel included) - depends what public transport fare you already use, this won't even be THAT more expensive and allows you to travel the whole country. There is LOT to be explored.
Reply With Quote
The following 8 users would like to thank YuropFlyer for this useful post:
  #6  
Old 16.11.2019, 00:32
curley's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: canton ZH
Posts: 11,014
Groaned at 175 Times in 146 Posts
Thanked 12,326 Times in 6,468 Posts
curley has a reputation beyond reputecurley has a reputation beyond reputecurley has a reputation beyond reputecurley has a reputation beyond reputecurley has a reputation beyond reputecurley has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

I know someone who took dance lessons and went boxing and seems pretty comfortable here within a short time.
Thinking about this, it's the perfect way to meet many people casually as both these sports demand a regular partner change in order to learn it properly. teamsports of course do the trick as well.

However, let me wish you a happy birthday, as it has already started.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank curley for this useful post:
  #7  
Old 16.11.2019, 07:26
omtatsat's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: CH
Posts: 10,828
Groaned at 2,030 Times in 1,118 Posts
Thanked 5,070 Times in 3,203 Posts
omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat
Re: Depression

Quote:
View Post
Hi everyone.

I recently got a new job in Basel. I moved from London! I get depressed because I want a girlfriend and friends but I sit here on weekends all alone cause I’m in this country all by myself. I find myself feeling really isolated and don’t know what to do. I don't speak the local language. Tomorrow is my birthday and I haven’t got anything planned lol!
Good luck in the social winderness of Switzerland. And happy birthday!
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank omtatsat for this useful post:
  #8  
Old 16.11.2019, 07:57
Raffles's Avatar
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: In the shadows of your mind.
Posts: 145
Groaned at 4 Times in 2 Posts
Thanked 327 Times in 137 Posts
Raffles has a reputation beyond reputeRaffles has a reputation beyond reputeRaffles has a reputation beyond reputeRaffles has a reputation beyond reputeRaffles has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

Happy birthday mate.
Get out for the day, blow some cash, enjoy the weekend.

Last edited by Raffles; 16.11.2019 at 09:14.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Raffles for this useful post:
  #9  
Old 16.11.2019, 08:50
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Geneva
Posts: 4,005
Groaned at 37 Times in 31 Posts
Thanked 5,583 Times in 2,002 Posts
McTAVGE has a reputation beyond reputeMcTAVGE has a reputation beyond reputeMcTAVGE has a reputation beyond reputeMcTAVGE has a reputation beyond reputeMcTAVGE has a reputation beyond reputeMcTAVGE has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

I know the feeling, but personally I find it strange to use lol with the word "depression" or are you more feeling "down" and "fed up"? Not quite the same.
Having had to deal with living suddenly by myself, I know how you feel on a day like your birthday especially, Xmas being another tough one for lonely people.


Daytime (today): dress to kill, go to a shop and buy yourself something nice, treat yourself to a nice brunch, don't forget to take your favourite book or go to an international newsagent and get a newspaper from back home.


Depending on what you like, visit a museum, a library, check what's on through your local expats links... Tell "Gruezi/Bonjour" to as many people you see, you'll feel good.


Evening: go and listen to some live music, treat yourself to a nice restaurant (not a top range, fussy, formal one where no one will talk to you but one buzzing with locals...even without the language, look at people, smile, someone will react and engage the conversation with you).
In November, we Scots celebrate St Andrew with a ceilidh (big Scottish dance party,, great fun!). There's bound to be some around your way, check it out and get back to me to praise Scottish hospitality and sense of partying! If all fails, come to ours in Geneva, but that's a bit far from Basel.


Most importantly, Happy Birthday!
Reply With Quote
The following 9 users would like to thank McTAVGE for this useful post:
  #10  
Old 16.11.2019, 10:15
grumpygrapefruit's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Zuriwest
Posts: 6,218
Groaned at 37 Times in 36 Posts
Thanked 16,494 Times in 4,310 Posts
grumpygrapefruit has a reputation beyond reputegrumpygrapefruit has a reputation beyond reputegrumpygrapefruit has a reputation beyond reputegrumpygrapefruit has a reputation beyond reputegrumpygrapefruit has a reputation beyond reputegrumpygrapefruit has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

Happy Birthday!

And as others have said, don't stay at home. There's plenty of clubs, evening classes and groups you can join up with. Check out Meet-up, there's also a FB group for internationals in Basel, just post an intro and see what's going on today.

Or come to Zürich (it's only an hour on the train). I run a small bar and Saturday afternoon there's always a big bunch of international people, some couples, many single (including lots of nice girls!). I'll buy you a beer for your birthday!
Reply With Quote
The following 5 users would like to thank grumpygrapefruit for this useful post:
  #11  
Old 16.11.2019, 10:29
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: London
Posts: 117
Groaned at 33 Times in 15 Posts
Thanked 231 Times in 69 Posts
Brian1985 is considered knowledgeableBrian1985 is considered knowledgeableBrian1985 is considered knowledgeable
Re: Depression

Use meet-up www.meetup.com and enter your city. This has been a life saver for me. There are events every night of the week and most of the attendees are young single types who have moved to CH and are looking to make friends/meet people. It's not all boozing either and they also do things like hikes and excursions. Failing that, you can always get yourself a "lady of the night" haha.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Brian1985 for this useful post:
  #12  
Old 16.11.2019, 10:42
Sky's Avatar
Sky Sky is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere special far away
Posts: 4,114
Groaned at 53 Times in 39 Posts
Thanked 6,355 Times in 2,426 Posts
Sky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

Justin, Happy Birthday !!!!! 😊
Something about your words makes me believe you are in your 20s ?
If so, may I kindly suggest you check the social events at Basel uni ?
There are always lots of student get-togethers and evenings.
Sign up to audit/follow an evening English literature course and as a native speaker you’ll soon be involved and meeting other young people.

I loved the thoughts on this thread and will borrow a few.
Life can be so lonely sometimes 🌸
Reply With Quote
The following 4 users would like to thank Sky for this useful post:
  #13  
Old 16.11.2019, 10:49
omtatsat's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: CH
Posts: 10,828
Groaned at 2,030 Times in 1,118 Posts
Thanked 5,070 Times in 3,203 Posts
omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat omtatsat
Re: Depression

Quote:
View Post
Happy Birthday!

And as others have said, don't stay at home. There's plenty of clubs, evening classes and groups you can join up with. Check out Meet-up, there's also a FB group for internationals in Basel, just post an intro and see what's going on today.

Or come to Zürich (it's only an hour on the train). I run a small bar and Saturday afternoon there's always a big bunch of international people, some couples, many single (including lots of nice girls!). I'll buy you a beer for your birthday!
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 16.11.2019, 12:56
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Zürich
Posts: 338
Groaned at 26 Times in 18 Posts
Thanked 323 Times in 171 Posts
Rjellsch has an excellent reputationRjellsch has an excellent reputationRjellsch has an excellent reputationRjellsch has an excellent reputation
Re: Depression

Not sure how close or convenient it is but I think there is a big restaurant exhibition in Basel this weekend. From my experience, that is an industry with many open and friendly people. Maybe they have an evening program with some social events. You could probably find some English speaking folks to hangout with just from overheard conversation.

Happy Birthday, too. 😊
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 16.11.2019, 16:18
TonyClifton's Avatar
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2019
Location: Zurich
Posts: 376
Groaned at 175 Times in 110 Posts
Thanked 1,003 Times in 492 Posts
TonyClifton has a reputation beyond reputeTonyClifton has a reputation beyond reputeTonyClifton has a reputation beyond reputeTonyClifton has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Depression

As others have mentioned:
Join a club
Do a language course
Do sport and keep yourself fit
Join a few online dating websites and go on a few dates
Test the water and see if you can invite a few work colleagues to go out and meet socially
DON’T stay at home on your own
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 02.12.2019, 10:19
Newbie
 
Join Date: Oct 2019
Location: Zurich
Posts: 2
Groaned at 1 Time in 1 Post
Thanked 3 Times in 1 Post
SirenSong has no particular reputation at present
Re: Depression

All of this advice is solid--but you might want to consider talking to someone as well. There are several english speaking therapists around the city and if what you're struggling with is depression the best thing to do (and likely the thing yo least want to do) is talk about it with someone. Just my two cents! Good luck Justin, I hope your birthday was a good day!
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank SirenSong for this useful post:
Reply




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Burnout or Depression Gerry's Holly :) Family matters/health 11 01.05.2019 13:51
Diagnosed with depression Keith66 Family matters/health 72 20.05.2018 20:25
What do I do if I have depression? Xamarth Family matters/health 41 21.08.2016 11:34
Anyone recovered from depression? missnobody Family matters/health 107 08.10.2013 21:48
postpartum depression PennyMama Family matters/health 9 28.02.2013 17:24


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 13:19.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0