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  #21  
Old 23.12.2020, 22:52
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Re: Marital woes

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Same goes for women.

Tom

Indeed. However, let's be honest, the above situation happens more to women than men. It's the nature of the beast.
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  #22  
Old 26.12.2020, 13:42
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Re: Marital woes

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Indeed. However, let's be honest, the above situation happens more to women than men. It's the nature of the beast.
Actually it's a probability thing. More men marry women from abroad for immigration.

She on the other hand used him as an entry ticket into a western society, for her own egotistic economic improvement. Basically all answers assume such, implicitly, and seem to think that's perfectly fine.

So who's using whom again?

You don't know what makes him react like that. She could be the worst cu.nt on earth but of course she'd never tell, no one would. And posters would never consider such, let alone assume, that's reserved for the evil man. People of a certain conviction believe all women and automatically assume that the man is the bad one. After all that's what women always are: the victim.
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  #23  
Old 26.12.2020, 14:02
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Re: Marital woes

Wow. Just wow.
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  #24  
Old 26.12.2020, 14:29
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Re: Marital woes

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Actually it's a probability thing. More men marry women from abroad for immigration.

She on the other hand used him as an entry ticket into a western society, for her own egotistic economic improvement. Basically all answers assume such, implicitly, and seem to think that's perfectly fine.

So who's using whom again?

You don't know what makes him react like that. She could be the worst cu.nt on earth but of course she'd never tell, no one would. And posters would never consider such, let alone assume, that's reserved for the evil man. People of a certain conviction believe all women and automatically assume that the man is the bad one. After all that's what women always are: the victim.
Who took the jam out of your doughnut?
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  #25  
Old 26.12.2020, 16:06
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Re: Marital woes

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Who took the jam out of your doughnut?
I'm simply done with the misandrist sexism, bullshit like "it's the nature of the beast". While it my be meant figuratively it still paints all men as brutes.
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  #26  
Old 26.12.2020, 17:09
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Re: Marital woes

Rubbish!

Obviously on a forum we answer on the information given.

To each their own. Yes, we don’t know the deal they made but I have a hunch the charming husband had a clue what her reasons for marriage were. You are right that we don’t know, she may (or may not) be an awful person (not going to repeat your charming chosen term, which says a lot in itself btw.) but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior. Ever. A decent guy would just leave.

I can’t stand the victim mentality myself and I still sympathize with her story and situation. She is looking for solutions as well, not just whining so doesn’t sound like a victim at all.

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Actually it's a probability thing. More men marry women from abroad for immigration.

She on the other hand used him as an entry ticket into a western society, for her own egotistic economic improvement. Basically all answers assume such, implicitly, and seem to think that's perfectly fine.

So who's using whom again?

You don't know what makes him react like that. She could be the worst cu.nt on earth but of course she'd never tell, no one would. And posters would never consider such, let alone assume, that's reserved for the evil man. People of a certain conviction believe all women and automatically assume that the man is the bad one. After all that's what women always are: the victim.
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  #27  
Old 26.12.2020, 17:17
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Re: Marital woes

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Actually it's a probability thing. More men marry women from abroad for immigration.
True. My late wife's ex was a Swiss she met in Canada, and married when they moved here.

Meanwhile, wife #2 married a Vietnamese boat person before me (but I was already Swiss when we met), and still bitches about Viet-cong and Americans when she's in a bad mood.

Tom
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  #28  
Old 26.12.2020, 18:40
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Re: Marital woes

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Actually it's a probability thing. More men marry women from abroad for immigration.

She on the other hand used him as an entry ticket into a western society, for her own egotistic economic improvement. Basically all answers assume such, implicitly, and seem to think that's perfectly fine.

So who's using whom again?

You don't know what makes him react like that. She could be the worst cu.nt on earth but of course she'd never tell, no one would. And posters would never consider such, let alone assume, that's reserved for the evil man. People of a certain conviction believe all women and automatically assume that the man is the bad one. After all that's what women always are: the victim.
The plan was that he was gonna move to me after we got married but it did not work out with his job so i came to him. It's still the plan in a few years if we're still together
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  #29  
Old 26.12.2020, 18:46
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Re: Marital woes

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Actually it's a probability thing. More men marry women from abroad for immigration.

She on the other hand used him as an entry ticket into a western society, for her own egotistic economic improvement. Basically all answers assume such, implicitly, and seem to think that's perfectly fine.

So who's using whom again?

You don't know what makes him react like that. She could be the worst cu.nt on earth but of course she'd never tell, no one would. And posters would never consider such, let alone assume, that's reserved for the evil man. People of a certain conviction believe all women and automatically assume that the man is the bad one. After all that's what women always are: the victim.
Just in case anyone is wondering what the heck they are reading: Urs appears to be a misogynist of such potent and unfettered bitterness and frustration that the only conclusion that can be drawn, is that he has in the past had some seriously bad luck with the opposite sex. Possibly more than once.

I can only shudder when I read such poison and vitriol towards women because I can't help but think that anyone who can say things like that that publicly must hold more sinister thoughts beneath the surface.

Last edited by Chuff; 26.12.2020 at 19:28.
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  #30  
Old 26.12.2020, 20:03
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Re: Marital woes

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Rubbish!

Obviously on a forum we answer on the information given.

To each their own. Yes, we don’t know the deal they made but I have a hunch the charming husband had a clue what her reasons for marriage were. You are right that we don’t know, she may (or may not) be an awful person (not going to repeat your charming chosen term, which says a lot in itself btw.) but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior. Ever. A decent guy would just leave.

I can’t stand the victim mentality myself and I still sympathize with her story and situation. She is looking for solutions as well, not just whining so doesn’t sound like a victim at all.
That's not the point. Not at all. Feel free to try again.

After considering that I didn't reply to OP but to olygirl's misandrist post.
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  #31  
Old 26.12.2020, 21:03
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Re: Marital woes

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Just in case anyone is wondering what the heck they are reading: Urs appears to be a misogynist of such potent and unfettered bitterness and frustration that the only conclusion that can be drawn, is that he has in the past had some seriously bad luck with the opposite sex.
And you are a misandrist moron!

Tom
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  #32  
Old 27.12.2020, 10:47
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Re: Marital woes

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Rubbish!

Obviously on a forum we answer on the information given.

To each their own. Yes, we don’t know the deal they made but I have a hunch the charming husband had a clue what her reasons for marriage were. You are right that we don’t know, she may (or may not) be an awful person (not going to repeat your charming chosen term, which says a lot in itself btw.) but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior. Ever. A decent guy would just leave.

I can’t stand the victim mentality myself and I still sympathize with her story and situation. She is looking for solutions as well, not just whining so doesn’t sound like a victim at all.

This.


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The plan was that he was gonna move to me after we got married but it did not work out with his job so i came to him. It's still the plan in a few years if we're still together
@OP,

I hope everything will turn out OK for you in the future, but you really have to ask yourself why is he behaving like that. If I were you I wouldn't plan my life with someone who can snap at me for the tiniest disagreements, here or back to your home country. Obviously the guy has a superiority complex and I don't think it's accidental when he snaps at you like that. Maybe it's better you moved here so you can see his true colours.
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  #33  
Old 27.12.2020, 10:54
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Re: Marital woes

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Assuming you're male (?), maybe you're a magnet for histrionic women? They use their emotions to manipulate (they also usually get angry when they're not the center of attention). It's a personality disorder that's more common among women but men can have it as well.
Pancakes.. in my 12 years on this forum what have I done to give you the impression that I could be a chick?:
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  #34  
Old 27.12.2020, 11:01
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Re: Marital woes

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Pancakes.. in my 12 years on this forum what have I done to give you the impression that I could be a chick?:
lol. Honestly, I often have trouble remembering who is who and what is what in this place.

I just found out recently that 22Yards is male, although for whatever reason, I had had it in my mind for quite some time that he was female.

I'm just going to start thinking of each of us as being "gender fluid" from now on.
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Old 27.12.2020, 11:06
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Re: Marital woes

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Pancakes.. in my 12 years on this forum what have I done to give you the impression that I could be a chick?:
Must be your girly physique!

Tom
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  #36  
Old 27.12.2020, 11:09
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Re: Marital woes

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Must be your girly physique!

Tom
Nah, it's his poetic siggy.
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Old 27.12.2020, 12:43
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Re: Marital woes

OP - I hope you find a solution to your situation. We all understand that you do not feel like starting from scratch. Nobody does..Wrong choice of partner will force you to do that, sometimes. Good luck, stay safe and realize that the interwebz is public. Good of you to come and brainstorm, anyways.
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  #38  
Old 27.12.2020, 12:43
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Re: Marital woes

siggy? Now here is a word I do not know. Did you mean his ciggy?

However:

''MORON

noun

Informal. a person who is notably stupid or lacking in good judgment: I wonder why they elected that narrow-minded moron to Congress.

Psychology. (no longer in technical use; now considered offensive) a person of borderline intelligence in a former and discarded classification of mental retardation, having an intelligence quotient of 50 to 69.''

I was under perhaps false impression that personal insults are not allowed on EF. If they are, then, yes, the description is indeed perfect, in this case.
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  #39  
Old 27.12.2020, 13:41
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Re: Marital woes

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I was under perhaps false impression that personal insults are not allowed on EF. If they are, then, yes, the description is indeed perfect, in this case.
I meant it a a compliment, not as an insult.

Tom
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Old 27.12.2020, 13:49
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Re: Marital woes

Referring to someone as a moron can never be considered a compliment in my opinion, itís just unpleasant.
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