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  #21  
Old 05.01.2021, 13:50
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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Here is the thing, most of us have only space for about five to eight people genuine friends in our lives at any one time. When you arrive here most of your slots are free, where as the locals have all their slots full up. And you’re going to have to wait for a slot to open up. It does not help, that the locals maintain friendships with people the were in kindergarten with 90 years ago either.

The other thing is that the Swiss tend to keep work and the rest of their lives separate. I don’t have a single Swiss friend that I met through work. They are all people I met while involved in local activities.

So if you want to get to know the Swiss people, you need to get involved in local activities, not the typical expat stuff such as language classes etc...
Haha, free slots. I liked the comparison although I don't think we come with free slots here, we make room for friends and friendship.

Btw, I'm still friends with my ex-colleagues from the very first work place I had in Switzerland, so I guess it depends. On age probably and many other variables.

But I'd agree on one thing: here you learn to socialise more through a hobby or a common interest than just hang around, having a beer or a coffee etc.
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  #22  
Old 05.01.2021, 15:42
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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*Insert the trope of "the Swiss may be reserved but once they decide to become your friend, they're you're friend for life..."
Sounds almost like a threat.
Beware which Swiss you become friends with.
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  #23  
Old 05.01.2021, 18:39
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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Sounds almost like a threat.
Beware which Swiss you become friends with.
Thank you everyone for all Your help
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  #24  
Old 05.01.2021, 19:05
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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It's true. Unfortunately, I'm so intelligent that I have no friends at all
My dad claims he has two friends. For a 58 year old bloke that's not bad.

Sadly one has been dead for 15 years and the other he despises but is my mums best friends husband.
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  #25  
Old 05.01.2021, 21:25
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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It's true. Unfortunately, I'm so intelligent that I have no friends at all
Do you talk to yourself then and have only dinners for one?
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  #26  
Old 05.01.2021, 21:56
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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Do you talk to yourself then and have only dinners for one?
A cat, mate, a cat.

Or a wife and 8 kids. Might be intelligent but too driven.
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  #27  
Old 06.01.2021, 08:33
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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Time to drag out the Deville classic?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCSQwPv6Z-k
This was truly very funny, stereotypical, but accurate and somehow wrong and right all at the same time.

We got a lot of laughs and chuckles out of the video.

Thank you.
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  #28  
Old 14.01.2021, 13:43
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Re: Life in Switzerland

Part of your problem at the moment is covid, but once it (hopefully) becomes possible to socialise again, I would agree that finding friends through mutual interests is the most fruitful. Go to a gym, or swimming, or if you like dogs get a dog and meet other dog walkers. Or does your friend that you mention have any other social groups/contacts? We have found it a bit more successful to expand our (still small) network of friends by inviting a friend or two, and suggesting that they invite another friend along, and in that way we can get to know those people as well and try to build a friendship. Meeting other families through kids also works well, but if you don't have kids that doesn't help you. You could also investigate volunteer work to meet other people doing the same thing.
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  #29  
Old 14.01.2021, 16:03
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Re: Life in Switzerland

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I remember reading an article once that said that more intelligent people tend to have smaller circles of friends because they're more selective.
I must be highly intelligent. Time to kill the last remaining friend, I want to be the pinnacle of intelligence

Everyone comes with baggage. The more "friends" I collected the more I felt like a baggage handler I keep everyone at arms length now. I don't invest emotionally in other peoples life or problems. There are way too many psycho people out there and my time is limited.

They say if you find one person in your lifetime who is a true friend then you are a winner! For some it is a popularity contest for others it is a quality contest. I prefer quality over quantity.
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