Go Back   English Forum Switzerland > Help & tips > Family matters/health  
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #221  
Old 10.09.2010, 20:54
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Manchester
Posts: 806
Groaned at 40 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 305 Times in 188 Posts
menace has a reputation beyond reputemenace has a reputation beyond reputemenace has a reputation beyond reputemenace has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

If I was a man, or hadn't tried breast feeding, I would not claim to have personal experience. That would be idiotic, obviously. However, I have had plenty of experience of woman breast feeding. And my mother is a community midwife and has been for 35 years, so she knows a bit about it. More than most, I would venture to suggest. I may have picked up one or two snippets of information from here over that time.

Regardless, I am entitled to my opinion, even if it is a completely ignorant one
Reply With Quote
  #222  
Old 10.09.2010, 20:55
Nil's Avatar
Nil Nil is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Basel
Posts: 10,400
Groaned at 434 Times in 338 Posts
Thanked 16,045 Times in 6,322 Posts
Nil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post
That's a bit harsh nil. Men can know a lot about breast feeding if they have watched and helped their partner through it. They're granted never going to know how it feels or how painful it may be (like i have no idea) but they can also have the wish that their kids are breast fed if possible

Those hormones are really getting you eh
Yes they are....

After reading it again, I found his speach being the one we should avoid.

If he is a father, I can understand he wants the best. But if he is a husband and a father who was there to see how difficult it can be, he wouldn't talk like this.

The way he talks reflect on a lack of experience what so ever on the topic.
Reply With Quote
  #223  
Old 10.09.2010, 20:56
Tilia's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,765
Groaned at 81 Times in 45 Posts
Thanked 2,649 Times in 1,194 Posts
Tilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Yeah, I really don't understand why men need Viagra. C'mon, man has been having sex since the beginning of time. Most natural thing in the world. Just takes a bit of will-power and support from the family and of course he will get it up.



Quote:
View Post
Imagine the first woman in the world to try bottle feeding a baby. I reckon she found it harder than breast feeding. Especially when she realised it was with milk squirted out of a cow.

Fast forward to today, and it amazes me that, considering all the antibiotics and steroids and other chemicals they pump into cows, not to mention their feed, any parent would consider feeding their children with that rather than what nature intended before even trying. Its the most natural thing in the world, successfully practiced by mammals for millions of years, and certainly a lot more natural and easier than, say, fake tits.

Problem is, it's not so easy for someone to make money from it. Just ask Nestle.
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank Tilia for this useful post:
  #224  
Old 10.09.2010, 20:57
Nil's Avatar
Nil Nil is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Basel
Posts: 10,400
Groaned at 434 Times in 338 Posts
Thanked 16,045 Times in 6,322 Posts
Nil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post

Regardless, I am entitled to my opinion, even if it is a completely ignorant one
Amen

But you can also be wise and learn from it.
Reply With Quote
  #225  
Old 10.09.2010, 21:14
smackerjack's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: U.K/VAUD
Posts: 2,180
Groaned at 14 Times in 7 Posts
Thanked 2,466 Times in 1,058 Posts
smackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post

I already feel worried that in 13 weeks time I may not be able to and I think I'll be more embarrassed to get a bottle out in public than my breasts.

Wow,I didn't know you were expecting but felt really sad to read that you are worrying whether you can breastfeed or not.
When I had one of my children my dear friend had a baby at the same time. I chose to breastfeed she didn't. I have to admit that she was put under pressure but stuck to her decision. And that is it - it is HER baby, HER body and HER choice.
Her son and mine have parelled each other - he does not seem to have allergies, any more colds etc.
If you can feed that is great and you can always express into a bottle to let your other half help. Being stressed does not help
If you can't that is ok too and if you don't want to never let anyone make you feel bad
Enjoy the end of your pregnancy and when you have your precious baby do what you feel is right - ( is there a baby boon on EF)??
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank smackerjack for this useful post:
  #226  
Old 10.09.2010, 21:17
Nickers's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Zurich
Posts: 3,735
Groaned at 41 Times in 35 Posts
Thanked 4,899 Times in 1,697 Posts
Nickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post
Wow,I didn't know you were expecting but felt really sad to read that you are worrying whether you can breastfeed or not.
I was more making a point really. I'm not overly worried, what will be, will be but I am not daft enough to expect it to be a breeze and instantly achievable. I have seen many friends struggle and some have to give up for various reasons. I know how some of those friends felt a failure hence why this thread annoyed me with some of the comments made
Reply With Quote
  #227  
Old 10.09.2010, 21:27
smackerjack's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: U.K/VAUD
Posts: 2,180
Groaned at 14 Times in 7 Posts
Thanked 2,466 Times in 1,058 Posts
smackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond reputesmackerjack has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post
I was more making a point really. I'm not overly worried, what will be, will be but I am not daft enough to expect it to be a breeze and instantly achievable. I have seen many friends struggle and some have to give up for various reasons. I know how some of those friends felt a failure hence why this thread annoyed me with some of the comments made

It makes me angry too. As you said - some friends felt a failure -

How can a woman feel a failure when she has nurthered this little being for 9 months, gone through a sometimes traumatic birth and produced another human being - she is definately anything but a failure - I cannot think of a word that describes how wonderful a new mother should feel about herself
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank smackerjack for this useful post:
  #228  
Old 10.09.2010, 21:28
Nil's Avatar
Nil Nil is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Basel
Posts: 10,400
Groaned at 434 Times in 338 Posts
Thanked 16,045 Times in 6,322 Posts
Nil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond reputeNil has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post
I was more making a point really. I'm not overly worried, what will be, will be but I am not daft enough to expect it to be a breeze and instantly achievable. I have seen many friends struggle and some have to give up for various reasons. I know how some of those friends felt a failure hence why this thread annoyed me with some of the comments made
You know, I felt awful when my milk supply died. I saw it coming to a end and the last ones were precious.

It took me a week or 2 and when I found out how wonderful my life was with a bottle! I could sleep throw the night, I could take a shower without rushing and my breast weren't tender and the constant tingling wasn't there anymore. I could do something else while hunny was feeding her. I didn't feel panic at feeding time when I was out...I was relieved.

If it does work for you, enjoy! If it doesn't, think about all the good things bottle feeding and Formula can bring too!
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Nil for this useful post:
  #229  
Old 10.09.2010, 21:43
Nickers's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Zurich
Posts: 3,735
Groaned at 41 Times in 35 Posts
Thanked 4,899 Times in 1,697 Posts
Nickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond reputeNickers has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Right I best bow out of this thread. I seem to have inadvertedly painted a picture of myself which is not necessarily true because I was trying to make a point in favour of the evil non breast feeders I'm stepping off my soap box now

Anyway rest assured I am pretty relaxed for now with whatever my outcome may be
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank Nickers for this useful post:
  #230  
Old 10.09.2010, 22:26
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Breast feeding

Why not find out who your la Leche League advisor is in your area is, and get in touch. Always best to meet her before the birth so you can discuss how you feel, ask any questions, etc. Then If you need support after the baby is born, you'll find it easier to ask, having met her before. Bonne chance, Viel Gluck dabei.

(Must say I am very happy I fed both ours for 8 months approx, in the UK a long time ago- and 1 daughter fed both hers recently- each to their own of course, but the medical evidence is very strong - and it is of course much easier (once you got established) and cheaper.)
Reply With Quote
  #231  
Old 11.09.2010, 00:36
hoppy
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Breast feeding

Of course Breast feeding is usually the better choice, but sometimes breastfeeding right-on mothers (I was one) can get on your nerves like ex-smokers.
Reply With Quote
  #232  
Old 11.09.2010, 07:43
MusicChick's Avatar
modified, reprogrammed and doctored˛
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: La Cote
Posts: 15,026
Groaned at 283 Times in 205 Posts
Thanked 17,459 Times in 9,028 Posts
MusicChick has a reputation beyond reputeMusicChick has a reputation beyond reputeMusicChick has a reputation beyond reputeMusicChick has a reputation beyond reputeMusicChick has a reputation beyond reputeMusicChick has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post

Breastfeeding seems almost like a luxury, especially when I read MusicChick's description of a 24-hour support team, and also when the majority of mothers around the world have to earn money to keep their families going. In CH, women don't get a decent amount of maternity leave, so I imagine breastfeeding after 3 months can be really stressful, and that affects the milk supply I imagine.

Every woman has to choose what is best for her and her child. I would like to try it if I have a baby, but I'd also bottle-feed so that his/her father could have bonding time as well. Also, what about stress? Can it be passed through the milk? I'm a kind of nervous and stressed out person prone to depression, so I'd be worried about breastfeeding for that reason. Other people take medication for different health issues, so that's probably a big factor too. I also wonder about the need for women to kind of 'take back' ownership of their bodies, and to reclaim their breasts as part of their sexuality? Is that an issue? Forgive my ignorance, it's because I haven't yet experienced this...
I wouldn't worry about passing on stress through the milk, since it is actually the most therapeutical thing - to have your own child happily nurse releases happy hormons, so most likely - if you do it right, it's like popping happy pills. It makes one sleep, that's how calming and efficient the whole chemistry is. It is therapeutical for the child, too, they smell, touch, it's a communication on a whole new level. You can do it with bottles too, I think it is just way simpler, faster and easier with nursing. Fathers can easily bond with expressed bm, for a good year I rotated 2l of frozen bm in our freezer (it can be stored 3mo if I remember well), to make myself more relaxed to what if scenario worries and to enable dad to do his "mom" duties, haha. Plus, there are moments, you will need to pump to dump, medication, whatever. You can even party.

There is 6mo bit in the law, protecting nursing. If you nurse, I think they either grant 6mo maternity leave, or provide nursing/pumping breaks during your work hours. At least in canton VD, my friend just went through this. Your HR will know.

Not everyone takes 3yrs (it is actually 4yr paid maternity leave back home if you don't mind your employer not holding your job for you anymore) of maternity, but people still hang on to nursing even when they work. I had to create the whole support network myself here - called the lact people back home who were a lot more knowledgable than anyone I found here, these lact specialists, who aren't paid but were successful themselves realized there are a few moments that can ruin the whole many months effort, so they are happy to help out. Once you do it, you realize how great it is for your child and you want to help, too. I didn't have an educated support to figure out the most basic troubles here, in fact the peds were against it, the lact agents here had no clue and gave ill advice, so I'll be glad to help anyone who is in need here. I'd do it at home too, but it is unlikely moms will call me from Prague at midnight, haha, when they are in trouble.

For the body ownership, yeah, one gets touched out. Seriously. But you have your guy to fix that, since that is what makes it click in your head..It is still a very natural push in your psyche, to have your child in your arms and nursing, so the few months that follow birth - one feels both, get back into the swing of things (not as much for some), and nurse. It's the normal hormon work. I think there is no point to think too much about it ahead of the time, just ride the wave when it comes.

Quote:
View Post
But, I am not naive enough to expect I can, nobody should assume they can. My point on this thread is that there may be people reading this who for whatever reason could not breast feed and if they were to believe the comments on here then they would believe they were evil mothers.
Nobody is an evil mom, I don't know any. Moms are prone to be too hard on themselves with anything as it is, really any little guilt trip that arises, but why go against nursing? It is better to offer support, peptalk and give confidence. I feel crappy too, since we didn't manage to cloth diaper, due to a number of things, and the idea of my child sitting 2yr + in plastic gives me creeps. But I am not going to ram my head against the wall for this, or say plastic diapers are at least as good as nice clean cotton cloth. We all make choices, mothering isn't easy as it is, so I'd never try to make anyone feel bad about not nursing.

It is up to anyone to decide how to feed, as with anything else. I haven't experienced any anti-formula feeding sentiments, it is so widely spread, especially here at home of Nestle. Back home the ff campaigning is being restricted, in EU too, since it aggressively advertized and pushed people ff rather than bf.

Have faith in your nursing abilities. It is like the ability to have tears appear in your eyes. That's how efficient it is. You just have to know the simple tricks, and there are only a few. There are roughly 2% of population that is unable to nurse, the rest is poor technique, ill advice, not enough support, nerves. Most people can easily do it, if they realize the mechanism, and act quick ahead of the time, to avoid loss of supply. When you get sensitive to the sings, you can easily predict and prevent, then it gets all automatic, no more planning and thinking, your body and your child's needs synchronize. You can rest your worries and have the luxury to expect and assume you will be able to nurse. If you have any doubts, want to get reassured or need some technical info, pm me.
__________________
"L'homme ne peut pas remplacer son coeur avec sa tete, ni sa tete avec ses mains." J.H. Pestalozzi

“The only difference between a rut and a grave is a matter of depth.” S.P. Cadman

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." A. Einstein

Last edited by MusicChick; 11.09.2010 at 21:27.
Reply With Quote
The following 2 users would like to thank MusicChick for this useful post:
  #233  
Old 11.09.2010, 08:54
Sky's Avatar
Sky Sky is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere special far away
Posts: 4,150
Groaned at 55 Times in 41 Posts
Thanked 6,418 Times in 2,448 Posts
Sky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Music.... impressive

Except for cloth diapers.... that one never even crossed my mind

For the ladies in waiting, I'd really like to stress the point that you shouldn't let anybody make you feel guilty regarding your choice.

Of course it is better to breastfeed, but not everybody can.

I wanted to, couldn't for very long because I had to take antibiotics, and I really disliked the pressure I got because I couldn't. It upset me quite a bit. Retrospectively I should have just let my mother in law and a few other self-righteous individuals yak away, but at the time it really cracked me up.
__________________
.
"Il mondo č fatto a scale, chi le scende e chi le sale"
Reply With Quote
The following 3 users would like to thank Sky for this useful post:
  #234  
Old 11.09.2010, 09:34
Tilia's Avatar
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: ZH
Posts: 2,765
Groaned at 81 Times in 45 Posts
Thanked 2,649 Times in 1,194 Posts
Tilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond reputeTilia has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

No, it is not. If we speak from a Western world perspective, there are some indications of benefits for breast feeding and some indications against. Not a single report I have read (and I have read a lot) speaks of strong or undisputed benefits. All reports are rather cautious and speak of possible benefits but usually also mentions that it may be due to other socio-economic factors.

This has lead me to believe that there is absolutely no reason to feel guilty or feel bad or feel that you're not giving your child the best protection if you chose not to breast feed. If you breast-feed, fine. If you don't breast-feed, fine as well. Same as some use Pampers and others use terry-cloth diapers.



Quote:
but the medical evidence is very strong
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Tilia for this useful post:
This user groans at Tilia for this post:
  #235  
Old 11.09.2010, 15:07
hoppy
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Breast feeding

For me it was about feeling comfortable sharing my body with someone else and trusting enough to let go not knowing what to expect.
I expected it to come totally naturally to me and it didn't. there was no way that I wanted to expose my breast and the first time I felt a babies mouth on them was an " OH my God No!" the people wanted to help me by touching my breats or standing over me and watching- I felt like crawling into hole.
Ijust knew that I had no excuse not to so I had to get on with it.


If you are too stressed out you won't get the let-down reflex, just like you can't orgasm. But once you get past the first one you know what to expect and enjoy the feeling. For the first few days the baby gets cholustrum, before the milk comes in so there is no rush. After a while when the baby feeds it demands eye contact and starts to gently massage-like effleurage the breast. Sometimes I just fed so that I could totally relax after work- Like getting a fix. Which is why it took me so long to wean them off.
Reply With Quote
  #236  
Old 11.09.2010, 17:11
olympe's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Hong Kong now Bern before
Posts: 557
Groaned at 6 Times in 3 Posts
Thanked 245 Times in 156 Posts
olympe is considered knowledgeableolympe is considered knowledgeableolympe is considered knowledgeable
Re: Breast feeding

You know Nil , the other important thing and I apologise if it has already been mention up here, is the support you get from the dad. I know a few women who wanted to breastfeed but the dad did not want. I also know some couple where both prefered bottle fed. When the couple is both ok with whatever decision.. it takes lots of pressure off, the most important one..

I breast fed both my kids and with the second one, I was working up to 50 hours a week. I was lucky that in China, I was allowed to come home at lunch time to breasfeed. But in the end, in her first 10 months and until we moved here ( I breasfed her until she was 7th month) , I did not spent as much time with my baby as some women who bottle fed do.. so who's the bad mum here?

And you should see now our eating habits..yes I breasfed but I don;t think they're having very good habits now..
Reply With Quote
  #237  
Old 11.09.2010, 17:35
hoppy
 
Posts: n/a
Re: Breast feeding

there can be a problem when the milk first 'comes in'and the breast are like hard watermelons, for the poor baby it is like trying to suck on a football. Various appliances like a nipple shield can help, but that is when someone may suggest a bottle to tide the hungry baby over. Sometimes it helps to express some milk off but not give it to the baby in the bottle. Instead you can then try again as it may be easier for the baby to latch onto a less engorged breast.
It is difficult to bottle and breatsfeed. For the baby it is easier to suck on a bottle- they need less muscle action, so once they take to the bottle they may not want the extra hard work of breast feeding. Similarly once established on the breast it might be difficult to get them to take the occasional bottle.

I was already sold on the fact that human breast milk is designed for human babies, but I wasn't told about the wonderful feeling that you can get from it. Also that it stimulates contractions which suck that belly back in, helps you to lose weight, gives you an amazing figure and leaves you with a lower risk of breast cancer.

After the beginning the only time I couldnt feed was after I single-handedly laid a lawn with turf in 90F weather in 3 hours. I was exhausted and the milk would not come in for my 6 -week -old. So he cried until I had rested and rehydrated.
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank for this useful post:
  #238  
Old 11.09.2010, 17:45
olympe's Avatar
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Hong Kong now Bern before
Posts: 557
Groaned at 6 Times in 3 Posts
Thanked 245 Times in 156 Posts
olympe is considered knowledgeableolympe is considered knowledgeableolympe is considered knowledgeable
Re: Breast feeding

I have to say that with my experience, I've never had any problem with pain or milk supply.. Not all women face problem with breastfeeding apart from being exhausted when you do it on demand. Also, I know now that my first baby suffered from Reflux and that I should have taken to a doctor and change my eating habit.
Reply With Quote
  #239  
Old 11.09.2010, 19:41
Forum Veteran
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Manchester
Posts: 806
Groaned at 40 Times in 28 Posts
Thanked 305 Times in 188 Posts
menace has a reputation beyond reputemenace has a reputation beyond reputemenace has a reputation beyond reputemenace has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

No experience of it, you say? I beg to differ. I was breast fed for, oh, a year? Then at 6 saw my brother being breast fed for even longer - he was a greedy b@st@rd and it used to shut him up. My mother runs breast feeding support groups, as well as doing pre and postnatal care and classes for mums and babies. The mother of my two children breast fed them both, and I was there all during that time. In fact, it was one of the reasons I chose her to be my kids mother, so to speak, the knowledge that she would and could breast feed.

Personally, I think its like a lot of things in life, how much do you want to do it? And probably similar to when you pick up a baby for the first time. If you do it with confidence, as well as care, the baby will feel it and respond accordingly.

Good luck, anyway. I have faith in women's ability to be tenacious in the face of all adversity. You've done pretty well as a sex, historically speaking, all things considered.
Reply With Quote
  #240  
Old 11.09.2010, 20:49
Sky's Avatar
Sky Sky is offline
Forum Legend
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Somewhere special far away
Posts: 4,150
Groaned at 55 Times in 41 Posts
Thanked 6,418 Times in 2,448 Posts
Sky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond reputeSky has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Breast feeding

Quote:
View Post
The mother of my two children breast fed them both, and I was there all during that time. In fact, it was one of the reasons I chose her to be my kids mother, so to speak, the knowledge that she would and could breast feed.
.

Breast feeding is important.... but to that extent ?

Quote:
View Post
Good luck, anyway. I have faith in women's ability to be tenacious in the face of all adversity. You've done pretty well as a sex, historically speaking, all things considered.
Yup, can only agree.... if we hadn't, nobody would be here to tell the tale
Reply With Quote
This user would like to thank Sky for this useful post:
Reply

Tags
breastfeeding




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Breast feeding at 8 !! Maple Leaf General off-topic 41 12.09.2010 19:48
Feeding the kids Swiss food Galatea Family matters/health 23 06.11.2009 13:25
Breast pump rental Zurich swiss_in_training Family matters/health 13 28.08.2008 21:32
Bird feeding Colonelboris Daily life 11 13.04.2007 13:22


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 04:47.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
LinkBacks Enabled by vBSEO 3.1.0