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Old 24.06.2011, 16:05
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Re: teething

Oops, you are right. I get tough titty and hot toddy confused.

Thinking of hot toddies...as my friends would say, there is always a right reason to have one, teeth or no teeth.
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  #82  
Old 24.06.2011, 16:28
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Re: teething

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Hmmmm....then they get into a super loyal, compliant ways, the authority pleasing phase, it's still super cure, but I kinda miss the spunk an drive of a mad tot, hahaha. The more hands on situations.
When does the authority pleasing stage start? What I wouldn't give for that phase as my pre-schooler fights everything tooth and nail. Food is particularly bad where I think the only thing she will eat these days is fish sticks and ice cream with occasional hot dog or strawberries. She's like a teenager in a tiny body. I don't think I'll miss this phase.
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Old 24.06.2011, 16:55
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Re: teething

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When does the authority pleasing stage start? What I wouldn't give for that phase as my pre-schooler fights everything tooth and nail. Food is particularly bad where I think the only thing she will eat these days is fish sticks and ice cream with occasional hot dog or strawberries. She's like a teenager in a tiny body. I don't think I'll miss this phase.

Kids are all different, but with us, it was about 3,5. Like a button was pressed. The minute she got verbal and could explain what she wanted and needed and why, the really mad tantrums were over. I have seen it with other multilingual kids, the fact they cannot express themselves well since the many languages are a bit overwhelming and they are generally verbally a little bit behind but socially well on spot, they have meltdowns. Well normal tots do, sure. But with us I noticed the breaking point of switching from meltdowns to more fun stuff, cooperation and story telling. I never believed people telling me one day you will miss the quiet phase of a nonverbal child, but hahaha, now I get stories, in 3 languages, every single second, the world stops because there are stories. She is happy to clean up since she can comment on it, she cooperates a lot more since now when I explain, she can ask the right questions she wants the right way and have things reexplained, etc. The tantrums were evil, but it felt like she needs to physically live through her handicap, and when she outgrew the handicap, it was gone. She loves to show she understands and is loyal, wants us happy. It's a tad odd.

With food, we were strict. If she knew the food and refused, we stuck to what was for dinner, maybe offer some fruit or poridge instead, but I do cook a lot of things she eats, pasta, pizza, rosti, raclette, soups, meat (she is a meat eater). If she didn't know the food, she wasn't allowed from a table without taking one little bite to test it, mostly she liked it so she ate it.

But it is true she just had a few months of pickiness, now, at 4,5. Creche was really good with this, seeing other kids munching down made her very inspired.

We all have tricks to trick them with, hahaha. One day they will be serving us food, that we won't be bothered chewing, I wonder.

Back to teething pains.
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  #84  
Old 24.06.2011, 17:32
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Re: teething

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Kids are all different, but with us, it was about 3,5. Like a button was pressed. The minute she got verbal and could explain what she wanted and needed and why, the really mad tantrums were over. I have seen it with other multilingual kids, the fact they cannot express themselves well since the many languages are a bit overwhelming and they are generally verbally a little bit behind but socially well on spot, they have meltdowns. Well normal tots do, sure. But with us I noticed the breaking point of switching from meltdowns to more fun stuff, cooperation and story telling. I never believed people telling me one day you will miss the quiet phase of a nonverbal child, but hahaha, now I get stories, in 3 languages, every single second, the world stops because there are stories. She is happy to clean up since she can comment on it, she cooperates a lot more since now when I explain, she can ask the right questions she wants the right way and have things reexplained, etc. The tantrums were evil, but it felt like she needs to physically live through her handicap, and when she outgrew the handicap, it was gone. She loves to show she understands and is loyal, wants us happy. It's a tad odd.
The multi-lingual angle is interesting. She doesn't really have mad tantrums anymore (she's 4.5) and her language skills are good along with always telling stories (I love that part, really) I can't say that she works very hard to make us happy. I'll keep hoping.

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With food, we were strict. If she knew the food and refused, we stuck to what was for dinner, maybe offer some fruit or poridge instead, but I do cook a lot of things she eats, pasta, pizza, rosti, raclette, soups, meat (she is a meat eater). If she didn't know the food, she wasn't allowed from a table without taking one little bite to test it, mostly she liked it so she ate it.
This one is very stubborn. I used to cook a lot, I love to cook and bake, but now am discouraged to the point of despair as if she doesn't want to eat it, she just won't eat and go to bed hungry. They say kids won't starve themselves but, this one I'm doubtful about. She used to eat a lot more back home so I'm not sure if this particular struggle has been amped up due to the move and not liking it here.
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We all have tricks to trick them with, hahaha. One day they will be serving us food, that we won't be bothered chewing, I wonder.

Back to teething pains.
LOL Don't forget the adult diapers, too.
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Old 25.06.2011, 07:37
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Re: teething

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This one is very stubborn. I used to cook a lot, I love to cook and bake, but now am discouraged to the point of despair as if she doesn't want to eat it, she just won't eat and go to bed hungry. They say kids won't starve themselves but, this one I'm doubtful about. She used to eat a lot more back home so I'm not sure if this particular struggle has been amped up due to the move and not liking it here.
It does not have to be a kid moving here, really, ours was born here and asks at least once a day when are going to move to granny and grandpa, since it's more fun there and more family friendly...

I have a stubborn child, too, I do appreciate it, since they are usually strong characters and won't get lost in the big school later on...I agree with you kids won't starve, really, just let her manage her own little body, kids need to feel hungry sometimes, they do. Mom always used to say hunger is the best cook. All the flavors are different than to what she is used to. It was frustrating for me to struggle with food here in terms of the appetite of my child (she is a non eater, too, couldn't care less, not picky but tiny portions), and anytime we went to see my family, she would eat no matter what, a piece of an old roll, strange things...

She might want to be in control over something, I would leave her alone, for a bit, and then slowly implement consistent routines (a piece of fruit with breakfast, or no cartoons on weekend morning, and apple sauce for dinner as a desert, all sorts of fruit compots and tasty veggie stews, splitting meals to more courses also feeds our child more). Organizing cooking parties for my kid and buddies also worked a treat, kids would bake together, or cook together and taste new stuff. Another thing is to have your child at parascolaire (if she is in enfantine), the mid break, eating lunch with other kids. Mine comes home eating barley, even tasted a salad the other day, hahaha, all sorts of different tastes. When she sees other kids doing yummm yumm and stuffing their little mouths, she does it too. Explaining how food works and what has and what has no vitamins is also good, the other day I got a poster form "got milk" CH version, where in pics they explain calcium as building blocs, etc. I know, it sounds complicated, but when kids know that we eat for reason (bananas give you potasium, vegies figer, carbs are for brain, meat for muscles) they feel like they are making the decisions. Plus, some kids are super clever, and just won't do what parents want, out of principle, since they do not see any reasons that they are the ones that benefit and it is their bodies that need fuel, we don't do stuff just to make mommy happy. This age is normal to be egocentric, really. The pleasing part comes, sooner or later. Let her starve a tiny bit..Then sit down with her and work out a week food planning, have her shop with you, weighing things on scales, asking for food at the counters, picking up bread she likes. She will be the Jamie Oliver, hahaha.

Kurcinka's books on Powestruggles and kids are great. Webs on Positive parenting are also good, since one feels pretty normal when reading it.

I had people telling me not to stress, and looking back, they were so right. It's always the moment of panic, you think they will really starve to death, their teeth will fall out, they will fall off their little school desks unconscious, hahaha, I am exaggerating...but looking back, I can see my child is pretty consistent in what she likes, what she has troubles with..no randomness. It's usually us that take time to figure these patterns out and make them work for us. Tangent, I now, sorry...

I purposely used food items for teething, by the way, or to play with on long drives and nibble on, hep me cut (she has cut with a knife for a while, she loves it, supervised) since I wanted to expand the palate a bit.
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