My grand son 4 1/2,expressed his dislike for the super menu like this
"I hate meatballs!I hate meat balls since I was a little kid"

I hope you do`t hold this one against me

Wille driving home with my sons familiy ,I my wife , son driving , DIL and 3 grand kids ,I am sitting beside #2,at that time not yet 3 years old and very very hyper .
Grand kid 'Sam' ; Out of the blue " Grandpa" . I "yes sam whats up" sam; "your stupid"

Boy o Boy I love my grand kids

HAHAHA kids can be so brutally honest.

Edit: not implying that you actually ARE stupid

During a drive to school and of course fed up with ...mummy will you buy me this and will you buy me that .... i was lecturing my 7 year old daughter...

Me: You cant have everything you ask for money is not grown on trees...
Her: pauses for a moment and says...yes Mom money comes from trees.
Me: And how is that little girl....
Her: Trees make paper and paper makes money.

Ended the lecture there

Oh my, she looks like a twin of my son.. He has an answer for everything, it drives me nuts.

Ex. 1:
Me: Stop touching everything!
Him: What, I can't even touch the ground? And the air around me?
Me: %&ç*&(

Ex.2:
Teacher: Do your writing exercise, it's important to write correctly!
Son: Why? Everybody has computers now.

When min was having a particularly drawey day and had gone through 10 sheets in as many minutes I told her paper doesn't grow on trees..... It's a good thing she doesn't know it does yet.

Bedtime story about a tiger led (somehow) to questions about earthquakes in Switzerland, then the rest of the world. Then right to the point-

"Why is there the Earth?"
uh, ok, brief description of the Big Bang
little Mud is no dummy, why and how are different
"No, WHY is there Earth, I mean everything? WHY?"
that's a good question Bubba, um,
little Mud turns to face me, wide eyed-

"It's the Greatest Mystery EVER!"

Yep, you're 100% right. Now go to sleep. Now I can't sleep.

Next time make little mud read YOU a bedtime story.

My step-daughter's four year old really enjoys the breakfast I gave her mum the recipe for when they stayed with us last year.
She announced ' I really like that burglar muesli' !

Son: Mommy, can a black person have a baby with a white one?
Me: of course Sweetie.
Son: and what colour will the baby be???
Me: Well, it depends. Normally a bit lighter than the black parent.
Son: can the baby have stripes like a zebra???

My 5 year old daughter needed to urgently use the bathroom just as I was getting out of the shower...

"Mom, why are your boobs so long?" I wanted to DIE! ...and not of laughter!
I very calmly explained that if it wasn't for her and her 3 siblings my boobs would be absolutely PERFECT!

My four years old:

I don't want to take a nap, I don't like to sleep: I tried it and I didn't like it.

And last night 4 years old's logic:

Mommy doesn't have a penis but daddy does.


(Thank God for that!)

I just had a surreal bedtime conversation with my 5-year-old.

5-y.o.: "Daddy, does the Earth die?"
Me: "Um ... well, it won't die for a very long time. Not while you or I are still here."
5-y.o.: "Not for millions of years? Not till the Sun dies?"
Me: "Right. Not for many millions of years."
5-y.o.: "But you will die soon."
Me: "Er ... no, not for a long time. I don't ever want to leave you!"
5-y.o.: "You'll have to leave me soon."
Me: "Why's that, darling?"
5-y.o.: "I'll be a daddy soon."
Me: (stifling a laugh) "Really? How soon?"
5-y.o.: "I think in five days. Maybe six."

I didn't even know he had the lucky future mother of his children lined up already.

My son decided that he will go on living with me with his future wife and the kids, so that I don't feel lonely and I can babysit his children.

I'm sure his wife will love the idea!

I've just joined the EF and this thread has really made me laugh. 4 year olds know everything (I have a 4.5 year old).

Min... What's called that I have for znuni
Me... Avocado
Min.... but what's it called in German
Me.... Avocado.
Min.... No, in German, German's a different language, the words are different.
Me.... Not all, like Avocado, tomato, house...
Min.... No, house is höüse (or however the Zuriduetch is spelled).
Me.. ok, but avocado and tomato are the same in both....

continues until we get to krippe

Me to staff.... how do you say tomato and avocado in german
Krippe worker... tomato and avocado.
me to min.... see.
min. hurumph

later in toilet washing hands

Me... there's another word that is the same in English nd German, toilet
Min.... Oh muuummm, don't start that again.

My friend's 3-year old kid announced to his parents: I am getting marrid to Ana. The parents asked: how is that Adrian? Kid replies, I adore Ana, she adores me, there is no discussion, we are getting married. So sweet

kid also announced: Planet Earth should be called Planet Water!

We have been trying to out 2.5 year old that she has a baby brother on the way

Result:

Shaw pats her stomach and says
"There is a baby boy in Marie's tummy too"

Not for at least 20 years there isn't Mlle!

My son had a similar idea when he was younger; he said when he was all grown up I could live with him. I said, oh, that's very nice of you, I can clean your house and do your laundry. He answered no, you don't have to do any of that. Only cooking.