A story from a friend of a friend...

Apparently this lady, like so many of us, struggles to keep on top of her household tasks. Things often get left to the last minute...

One morning her son came to her with a reproachful expression on his face...

"Mummy, why didn't you pre-heat my trousers this morning?"

There you go mums, proof your children may actually prefer it when you leave the ironing to the last minute!

Tonight, at the dinner table:

Son: Mommy, A. brought an English book at daycare today!
Me: ah yes? How do you know it was English?
Son: it's obvious, we had to read it from right to left, in the wrong sense!

That's a Japanese manga son, not a road!

My 16-year old son is learning Italian. The other day he came home and told me:

Today we had to make sentences about what we love. I couldn't really think of anything, so I said: Amo la mia mama (I love my mom)

Aw, now isn't that sweet Is that the same boy who was ashamed of us last summer at the pool?

Not say, but do.
I pushed M too far in MurryMania. She saw a photo of Federer in the paper and got excited, so I started talking about him being number 2, and that Murry is number one (who has the Olympic gold? who is still in Wimbledon?) and she pulled a sulk and refused to talk to me unless I said Federer was number one. Too much of a Swisser.

Min is always asking me 'How do we make....' questions. (Often resulting in me saying 'WE don't make horses, horses make horses' luckily the next question hardly ever comes up). I decided to ask her one.
'How do we make beer?'
'You get some bubbles and....... Add some sugar........ And some milk...... Put it in the oven, then you have beer'

Town clock is striking, I look at little Muddette and ask, " Do you know for whom the bell tolls bubba?"

Straight back- "No."

Then, in her deepest possible voice, breaking into mock operatic song:

"For God
For God
For God is dead."

Then she cracked up, and so did I

This is so cute! I babysat a little girl once who hit a girl at school and when I asked her about it when she came home, she said, "She liked it". haha

Even when they're no longer really 'kids' they make you smile with the things they say.

Arriving at a rest area in France I commented
'Phoar what's that smell?'
OH replied 'What smell!'

To which our 13 year old promptly replied ' you know it's no use asking Daddy he can't smell anything. He's nose deaf.!!!'

His dad and I just cracked out laughing.

My trilingual toddler learning to speak, with a slight pronunciation problem.

'Fish' turns into a mix of English 'fish' + Portuguese 'pesce' to become... pi$$

'Sheep' becomes... 'sh!t'

And the one I like most: the French 'petit pain' (bread roll) becomes... 'pipi pain'

"Bub, why are you spitting raspberry seeds back into the yoghurt?"
" Recycling. You just explained me how it works."

Yeah.

"Mom can you switch the news off, please"
"Why, hon..you like the news"
"Coz when there are bad news, I am afraid of what's under the bed"

My dad tapped Min on her head in a playful way.
"Don't do that to my head. My dreams are asleep. They wake up when I go to bed"

After much trouble getting a 3yo into bed and staying there we discuss it at breakfast.
Me "when I put you in bed you need to stay there"
"I try but it is not my fault"
Me "whose fault is it?"
"my foot keeps falling out of bed and I need to follow it!!"
Me "okay.... how do we stop it?"
"you should tell it not to"

My five-and-three-quarters-year-old son served up a superb triple whammy at dinner time last night. We were chatting about various things when he suddenly asked:

Him: How old are you, Daddy?

Me: (I tell him ...)

Him: (Perfectly seriously) I didn't know anyone lived that long. (... 1!)

Me: (Laughing) Cheeky!

Him: Soon you'll be a grandpa walking around with a walking stick. (... 2!) Will you die before me, Daddy?

Me: I think so, darling, yes. But by then you'll have your own family, and you'll love them, and want to be with them.

Him: I always want to be in your family. I want to marry you when I'm older! (... 3!)

Reminds me of a conversation I had with my grandma at around the same age, which has passed into family history.

She was explaining to me how she was my mother's mother, and that that made her my grandma. Then she decided to give me a little test to see if I've understood.

Grandma: So when you grow up and have children, what will you be?

Me: Their mummy!

Grandma: That's right. And what will your mummy be?

Me: Their grandma!

Grandma: Yes! And what will I be?

Me (in a casual, off-hand way): Oh, you'll be dead.

My daughter (5) and I met an old lady that lives nearby and the lady told us about her new subscription to aquagym classes.

When the lady left us my daughter turned to me and asked:

"Mummy what will be of the left over classes when she dies? Can someone claim for money back?"

Drum roll please ... at 5 and a half and after only starting to form any recognisable words around 3 years old (he is autistic) my wonderful boy finally makes a genuine entry into this thread ....

He just loves his trains and all the train travel we did this summer - especially on our local Basel to Geneva/Lausanne line and he loves pretending to be the train guard. He reels off the station names in a great interpretation of the train announcements .. except "Yverdon-les-bain" has become "Il va dans le bain" (he goes in the bath ..)

. Very proud Mummy. :

Love this thread...

This is why I work with children they are always saying such funny things..

When I was teaching in a pre school back in the UK a child came up to me and said...

Miss what do you want to be when you grow up? I explained to him that I was quite grown up and that I came to work to look after all you boys and girls. I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. He cocked his head to the side and after a few seconds thinking he proudly said...a sea turtle .

Just gotta love what they say...

I got a backhanded compliment from my picky 6 year-old eater the other day: "Thank you Mommy for not making the omelette slimy this time!"

"Mom, you look like a real teacher again"

Summer's definitely out n ouva.