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Old 07.02.2011, 22:24
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Dodge Church taxes

Disclaimer: Sorry if this post may be offensive to you, just move on and don't read it, i'm currently a little pissed off at the organization

I registered to my local kreisburo as I'll be working here for the next six month. The gentle lady (GL) asked: "Are you religious?"
ME (honestrly): "No, agnostic"
GL (tricky): "Are you baptized?"
ME (as honest as dumb): "Yes"

Now I need to pay taxes to a church I don't believe and I'm going to hate even more I guess. Maybe it's not worth the effort but these guys earn on masses and I don't want to give them part of my money as gift.

It'd be better spent in drinks, or keeping Zurich as clean and pleasant as it is thank being obligated to give it to them.

Do you know what to do about that? I'm being taxed at source so I guess I better act before the end of the month?!?

What can I do?
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  #2  
Old 07.02.2011, 22:26
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Disclaimer: Sorry if this post may be offensive to you, just move on and don't read it, i'm currently a little pissed off at the organization

I registered to my local kreisburo as I'll be working here for the next six month. The gentle lady (GL) asked: "Are you religious?"
ME (honestrly): "No, agnostic"
GL (tricky): "Are you baptized?"
ME (as honest as dumb): "Yes"

Now I need to pay taxes to a church I don't believe and I'm going to hate even more I guess. Maybe it's not worth the effort but these guys earn on masses and I don't want to give them part of my money as gift.

It'd be better spent in drinks, or keeping Zurich as clean and pleasant as it is thank being obligated to give it to them.

Do you know what to do about that? I'm being taxed at source so I guess I better act before the end of the month?!?

What can I do?
Use the search button above?
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:30
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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What can I do?
OK. You'll need a black cockerel, a butcher's knife and a tub of ghee.

When you have acquired these materials, come back to this thread and tell me, and I'll give you the next set of instructions.
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:39
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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OK. You'll need a black cockerel, a butcher's knife and a tub of ghee.

When you have acquired these materials, come back to this thread and tell me, and I'll give you the next set of instructions.
Can you use old ma's mollasas instead of Ghee? Someone I know wants to know..ahem
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:41
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Can you use old ma's mollasas instead of Ghee?
'Fraid not.

Though a bottle of rum wouldn't go unused...
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:47
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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OK. You'll need a black cockerel, a butcher's knife and a tub of ghee.

When you have acquired these materials, come back to this thread and tell me, and I'll give you the next set of instructions.

Ready, what now?
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:48
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Ready, what now?
You got that black cockerel a bit quickly...
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:49
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Ready, what now?
So between 9.24 and 9.47 you obtained some Ghee?

Oh and the cockerel..thx DB
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:50
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

When I moved from BS to BL I said "konfessionloss" and that was the end of it. I have not stepped in a church since I got married but hey I am agnostic! And if I had to pay church taxes I'd rather pay for the reformed church even though I was baptized Catholic ...
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:50
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

Loads around here - any colour you like!

You should have seen the reaction when they asked us 'which religion?' and I replied 'none'. Everyone in the office jumped and stared (we had just bought the old Vicarage, ooops).
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Old 07.02.2011, 22:51
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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When I moved from BS to BL I said "konfessionloss" and that was the end of it. I have not stepped in a church since I got married but hey I am agnostic! And if I had to pay church taxes I'd rather pay for the reformed church even though I was baptized Catholic ...
You just had to go back on topic!!!
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Old 07.02.2011, 23:04
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

Donations which you make voluntarily to any religious order of your choice, can be offset against the taxes you pay. Are you sure that you understood the woman correctly?
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Old 07.02.2011, 23:05
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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What can I do?
Go back and tell them you don't belong to any church and you have no plans on joining any church and you are not paying church tax so they can remove that from your record. If they ask again if you were baptized tell them that you were but since you were a baby at the time, you had no choice in the matter, you consider it a violation of your human rights and are currently in the process of taking your parents to court in the Hague.
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Old 07.02.2011, 23:08
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Donations which you make voluntarily to any religious order of your choice, can be offset against the taxes you pay. Are you sure that you understood the woman correctly?
Are you sure I don't have a constant part of my salary detracted for something involving religious stuff? Supposing I don't donate to any church...
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Old 07.02.2011, 23:09
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Donations which you make voluntarily to any religious order of your choice, can be offset against the taxes you pay. Are you sure that you understood the woman correctly?
Are you sure? That of course, as most things, change from C'Kanton to C'Kanton. Here in NE, Church contributions are voluntary, but can only be deducted from Tax if you pay into Catholic, Christian Catholic (a bit like Anglican) or Reformed. No other religious groups.
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Old 07.02.2011, 23:10
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

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Go back and tell them you don't belong to any church and you have no plans on joining any church and you are not paying church tax so they can remove that from your record. If they ask again if you were baptized tell them that you were but since you were a baby at the time, you had no choice in the matter, you consider it a violation of your human rights and are currently in the process of taking your parents to court in the Hague.
Thanks for the laugh about taking my parents to court, I'd actually try that if I wasn't worried about getting things worse if I mention a process :P But I like the approach :P
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Old 07.02.2011, 23:29
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

Remember the silly film about Billy Connolly suing God, via the Vatican, because his boat was destroyed by a hurricane = an Act of God according to the insurance = not covered.
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Old 08.02.2011, 00:01
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

Why are you all so embarrassed to admit that you're Pastafarians? WWGSMD?
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Old 08.02.2011, 00:17
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

In some cantons you only get out of church tax by writing a letter to say you wish to leave the church. As grumpy said, using the search function will help...
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Old 08.02.2011, 00:19
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Re: Dodge Church taxes

I would write a letter to archbishop about possibility of mistake being made here stating clearly "agnostic" therefore not liable for church taxes in Switzerland. Wait, on the other hand, I would cut the middle man and I would address it directly to Vatican via papal fast delivery. Even better, send it via grey pigeons - Rome is down south afterall and let the birds have fun while enjoying a rewarding trip to somewhat warmer climate zone. Do you want link to site where they sell pigeons?

Last year I did it, because I believed in strong roots of my Dutch reformed church and riding on the wave of glory, I wouldn't allow my taxes to be unevenly redistributed. I know it might take weeks or even months to get a reply and the whole matter to be settled but having some good contacts with my Swiss friends who know some of their family members and uncles in famous Swiss Guard, I eventually succeeded. Only Carabinerri (Italian police), you know, happened to be pain in the ass because the latter ones infringed Berlusconi's new imposed law and in result abused the diplomatic channels.

But to cut the long story short I managed to reduce church tax from CHF55.99 per month to CHF5.99 plus I had to do weekly service of cleaning ecclesiastical edifice's backyard with broom and sometimes bring the milk from pastures to the fat priest. It's tough because I had to get up early in the morning and smell cowshit while listening to the cow bells. It still rings in my head this terrible sound. I tell ya..,

I hope it will help a bit. Good luck and try to use similar way of solving your tax problems.
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